Sword of the Valiant

I am still trying to figure out how Mystery Science Theater 3000 missed this "jewel."

The sight of Miles O'Keefe in a blonde pageboy wig had me screaming with laughter! Had he been in a dress, he would easily have surpassed the "leading lady" in a beauty contest.

As other commentators mentioned, Sean Connery, indeed, should take his James Bond-era firearms training and seriously HURT the agent who put him up for this catastrophe.

The icing on the cake?

Poor Sean with green eyeshadow smeared all over his face... THEN he is decapitated by our "hero" and his head says something truly goofy like, "Body retrieve me," which it does, like a well trained puppy dog, without stumbling over any obstacles, or having to feel around for the head.

It was after that that my best friend's hubby came out of his office and demanded that we change the channel: She and I were laughing so hard that he was afraid that we would do SERIOUS permanent physical injury to ourselves.

Not one to miss, but keep an ice pack handy for your ribs, which will be aching after this.

I thought the movie was entertaining. Sean Connery looked a little ridiculous as the green knight. I saw the movie as a love story between Sir Gawain, Miles O'Keeffe, and the Lady of Lyonesse, Lila Kedrova. It was amusing and cute.

The Sword of the Valiant looks like an exciting film. It stars Sean Connery, Miles O'Keefe, Trevor Howard, Peter Cushing, Leigh Lawson and Ronald Lacey.... with a cast like that, you feel sure that it must be a big, expensive, epic-scale production. Furthermore, if the script was rubbish, then surely they wouldn't have been able to persuade so many top actors to appear in it. Armed with this sense of certainty that the film is going to be a good one, you sit down to watch it with a degree of eagerness. Only then do you realise what a terrible, terrible mistake you've made.....

Yes, The Sword of the Valiant is a stinker! It stinks to high heaven in fact! It marks a career low point for Connery, and is only slightly better than O'Keefe's most legendary bad film of all, Tarzan the Apeman (1981). The story follows O'Keefe (sporting a laughable blond wig) as he sets out to solve a puzzle set for him by the evil Green Knight. He has just one year to solve the riddle, and if he has not reached an answer after that time he will die.

The make up department emerge with some credit. They've made Connery's Green Knight look quite good. Other than that, the film is a failure on every conceivable level. The music is awful, the supporting performances are embarrassing, the script is amateurish, the pacing is tedious, the climax is dreary, even the hairdressers (!) have failed to do their job competently. If you insist on watching The Sword of the Valiant (and believe me, you'd be best advised not to) then prepare yourself in advance for one of the most stupefyingly inept experiences you are ever likely to put yourself through.

This is certainly a dodgy film on many levels, but it has some redeeming moments. Sean Connery is terrific as The Green Knight, he obviously has a heap of fun in the role and steals the show.

If you come across this film you could do a lot worse.

This movie is based on an old English poem, unfortunately the scriptwriters couldn't match the prose.. It has a wonderful cast all earning a pay check and nothing more. But, it is fun to watch, for all the wrong reasons., The lead hero Gawain is obviously based on Prince Adam, AKA He-man, he looks the spitting image, the music is atrocious and the acting is woeful. Grand Moff Tarkin, James Bond, Gimli, a Time Bandit and Albert Steptoe and it's still awful (but fun in a bad way).