The Police Are Blundering in the Dark (1975) Poster

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5/10
The Police Don't Turn Up Until The Last Five Minutes
Bezenby5 September 2018
What a bizarre mess!

We begin by seeing a woman having her car break down and getting a pair of scissors in her neck for her trouble, which then leads to a shot of a deranged man tending a lettuce patch and chuckling. We then cut to another young lady who breaks down and calls her boyfriend to get help. He's says he'll be right along, but neglects to mention he's in bed with another girl. Naughty, fella, naughty!

This guy is Marcello and every single female member of the cast wants to tug his tummy banana. Marcello does eventually head off to pick up his girlfriend, but not before she receives a pair of scissors to the neck (although she's given time to strip off for the camera of course). Marcello is confused when he discovers his girlfriend's car is still around, so he's unsure where she's disappeared to, and instead he ends up at a villa full of very emotional people/suspects.

There's the afroed-wheelchair scientist who has perfected a machine that can print out peoples thoughts (which it does by taking pictures via the eye of a gold statue situated in the dining room!). His wife, who suffers from 'Erotomania', whatever that is - she just seems pissed off that she lives in the country, and their neice, a blonde, sexually repressed girl who lives in terror of her uncle and seems to be the main subject of the thought machine. Plus, there's the doctor who looks after the scientist, the giant gardners guy, angry butler Alberto and yet another sexually repressed maid who has the hots for Marcello, and everyone else for that matter.

This film looks like it cost about five lire to make and even though there's plenty of nudity to keep you awake, an interminable dinner party in the middle almost derails the whole thing. Luckily the thought machine and a novel death for the killer goes in its favour. Of course the killer's motives don't make much sense and there's a couple of extra twists at the end because...you know...it's a giallo. Got to have twists!
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6/10
Blundering all around
andebuchs11 March 2015
"La Polizia brancola nel Buio" (The Police are blundering in the Dark) occupies a place of honor among the bizarre gialli. Even for a Giallo, "La Polizia brancola nel Buio" is quite strange: the film begins with a bang; a girl is driving on a road and suddenly a flat tire forces her to stop by the road. She looks around and sees someone nearby, and she asks him to help her in changing tires. He promptly goes there to help her and the girl says: "molto gentile" (that could be translated as - very nice of you). Suddenly the face of the girl changes from a smile to an expression of terror; the stranger had a pair of scissors in his hands, and starts running after her with murderous intentions. She runs through a forest, hitting branches, and losing one by one her upper clothes, till her tits are bare, it's then that the killer reaches her and slashes her throat. Sex and violence!

After a while, there's another girl on a road, and she's forced to stop her car in front of an inn, her car must be fixed, and to crown it all, rain starts to fall, a heavy rain. Will this girl survive the inn? Well, anyway, this girl is wet, she wants to get dry, so she warms herself by the fireplace, but not before taking all her clothes off. It seems that there's someone in the room, or is it just imagination? These two girls and other ones had been going to a villa nearby to make photo shoots. This villa is inhabited by odd characters; many film scenes are filmed inside its walls, the characters do nothing much, they dine, talk, play cards, and there is the owner of the villa that invented a camera that photographs thoughts… and so on. There are many people who think that this part of the film is boring, but I haven't felt this way – the dialogues are completely over-the-top, and things are weird and ridiculous. And just don't forget – there's a killer on the loose.

This film could be cool, if the director had some sense of style, but no, the death scenes and everything is kind of pedestrian. I think that the only way of breaking the limits of a low budget is through the imagination, and this (in a way) is something the filmmaker lacks, but the film is so uneven, incoherent and amateurish, that it has some strange kind of charm. Why? I don't know. I've seen this film twice already.
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5/10
The cheapest giallo ever made?
HumanoidOfFlesh8 April 2010
The opening of "The Police Are Blundering in the Dark" features a brutal stabbing of a semi-naked young woman in the countryside.A journalist Giorgio D'Amato agrees to meet his friend Enrichetta at Parisi's villa,but when he arrives the model has been killed with a pair of scissors.Her presence at the villa was requested by the crippled owner of the villa who has invented a device which supposedly photographs thoughts.Helia Colombo's first and only movie is arguably the worst giallo of early 70's.It's cheaply made and deadly dull.There is some sleaze and nudity as all three victims are flashing their breasts during kill scenes.There is even a revolutionary camera that can photograph people's thoughts.My beat-up Super 8-sourced copy looks awful,the score by Aldo Saitto is annoying and the action often drags."La Polizia Brancola Nel Buio" is the last film of Polish-born actress Halina Zalewska,who died tragically in a fire in her Roman apartment in 1976.5 out of 10.
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6/10
A bungling, dim giallo with Eurotrash appeal
melvelvit-117 August 2008
Warning: Spoilers
THE POLICE ARE BLUNDERING IN THE DARK starts out with the brutal scissor stabbing of a woman who's car breaks down and continues with the murder of a model stranded at an inn on the outskirts of Rome. Just before she's stabbed to death -and buried in a lettuce patch- the girl calls her boyfriend to come and get her -but he's in bed with another woman and says he'll pick her up in the morning. These gruesome events occur near the villa of a famous artist who has just invented a device that can photograph a person's thoughts and the lackadaisical Lothario sets out to discover what happened to his girlfriend. More murders occur and among the suspects are the wheelchair-bound artist, his imperious wife (who suffers from "erotomania"), his devoted niece (who may or may not be his prisoner), the village doctor, a sinister butler, and a lusty maid. One of them is also an undercover Inspector but it's the contraption that catches the killer before being donated to science -hence the title. As in most gialli, the murderer's motive means nothing -but it's the movie's lack of set-piece style, suspense, and common sense that will probably disappoint hard core aficionados of the genre. On the other hand, connoisseurs of odd-ball Eurotrash should find it irresistible.
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3/10
Indecipherable Giallo-ish "Thriller"...
EVOL66630 July 2007
Warning: Spoilers
LA POLIZIA BRANCOLA NEL BUIO is an Italian film that unfortunately I can't tell you much about. I don't speak Italian, and being that this is another no subs/no dubs disc for me, I can't really give a thorough synopsis of what happens - but in a nutshell:

A woman is stabbed by an unidentified person wielding a pair of scissors when her car breaks down on a deserted road. The rest of the "action" of the film takes place in a house where the same killer starts knockin' off most of the chicks that are staying there. There seems to be some sort of side plot about a paralyzed guy who fidgets with some sort of mechanical gadget in a secret room that may or may not control a mask with a flashing eye in the dining area that may or may not exhibit some sort of mind-control over guests at the house...

Sorry - that's about as good as it gets with this one. LA POLIZIA BRANCOLA NEL BUIO seemed to have some giallo-ish elements, but unfortunately I can't even really verify that, as giallo films typically rely heavily on storyline, and again - I just didn't understand this one. The film appeared to be made on about a six-dollar budget and visually the film offered very little appeal. I'm trying to be fair with a rating given that I understand that the majority of my issue with it has to do with my lack of understanding the language - but for real - the kill scenes are weak as hell, and there's a few tits on display but no full-frontal. If I could have understood the plot, I may have given it another point (or maybe not...) as it is....3/10 from me...
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5/10
Blundering fools.
morrison-dylan-fan23 October 2014
Warning: Spoilers
After accidentally buying a 2nd copy of the satirical Italian Horror The Blood Stained Lawn,I was delighted to discover that the DVD seller had included a surprise "bonus" title on the disc,which led to me getting ready to see the police blunder in the dark.

The plot:

Heading to a photo-shoot ,a fashion models car breaks down.Getting out of the car,a stranger walks up to the model,offering to help fix the car.Suddenly,the stranger pulls a knife out and stabs the women to death.

A few weeks later:

Breaking down miles away from her photo-shoot,a women rushes to a near- by inn to make a phone call to her friend.Due to having planned a wild night with his girlfriend,the fashion model's friend tells her to stay at the inn for the night,and that he will pick her up tomorrow morning.Arriving at the inn,it is soon revealed that the fashion model has mysteriously disappeared.

View on the film:

Working on an extremely low budget,director Helia Colombo covers the film in Grindhouse slime,which goes from showing plenty of the murder victims skin,to being backed by a vibrating score from Aldo Saitto.Along with the Grindhouse grime,Colombo also gives the title an excellent creepy vibe,which goes from the Giallo elements having supernatural undertones,to the suspects having an uneasy "all in the family" which leads to this being a far from blundering Giallo.
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6/10
Fans of very strange cinema need only apply
Red-Barracuda1 September 2012
A reporter agrees to meet a model friend at an isolated villa. Turns out she's been stabbed to death by an unknown assassin. The owner of the villa is a wheelchair-bound man who has invented a device for photographing thoughts. Typically for these types of movies, the house is also populated by a selection of other oddballs and eccentrics.

The Police Are Blundering in the Dark is a bargain basement yet extremely strange giallo. It opens with a half-naked woman being chased by an unseen assailant and then being stabbed to death with a pair of scissors. But from hereon in it just gets stranger. The very idea of a machine that photographs thoughts is of course ludicrous. Its nearest giallo equivalent would be the ridiculous eye device in Dario Argento's Four Flies on Grey Velvet. But that's where the comparison ends, as this flick is hardly on the same level as Argento's one. It is a somewhat bizarre entry in the giallo sub-genre it does have to be admitted and for that alone it deserves at least some recognition. But it's strictly a movie for Euro-trash connoisseurs, it's not even going to necessarily appeal to giallo enthusiasts as it's a little bit too clunkily offbeat for its own good.
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5/10
Sure, blame it on "La Polizia"...
Coventry24 February 2021
I guess, after having seen 140 genuine gialli and another 40 giallo-ish thrillers, I have to accept that all the really good ones are discovered already. The only ones that occasionally still float to the surface are obscure, low-rated and forgotten for a reason. The omens for "The Police are Blundering in the Dark" were quite negative from the start. Filmed in 1972 but not released until 1975? 1972 was THE most productive year for the Italian giallo ever! Dozens of gialli were released in this year, some of the best but also many mediocre ones, so how bad must it have been not to receive a release in '72? Three years later the gialli was as good as extinct, but this film still had to be released. You know what? The Poliziotesschi replaced the giallo in terms of popularity, so let's give it a new title with a reference towards the police. Minor problem, maybe... there isn't a police officer in sight throughout the entire film.

And yet, I'd lie if I said I didn't enjoy "The Police are Blundering in the Dark" at all. The script is really poor and hardly makes any sense, but the film features three extended and gruesome murder sequences, during which the female victims are largely naked before getting sliced with scissors, knives or letter openers! Isn't that the essence of gialli?

Moreover, and I just discovered this (thank you, Wikipedia), the name of writer/director Helia Colombo is a pseudonym of Elio Palumbo, and he happens to be the songwriter of - hands down - one of the most beautiful songs ever made; - namely "Tornerò" by the band "I Santo California". If you don't know it, look it up! Fascinating how the creator of such a pure and heavenly song, also made this sleazy and misogynic thriller.
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3/10
Remarkably Boring Giallo
kayrannells16 February 2021
Talky, nearly gore-free, and overlong at under 90 minutes, The Police Are Blundering in the Dark might be one of the least interesting giallos ever made. While most giallos aren't known for their award winning scripts or realistic dialogue, there's usually a little style or sleaze to keep one's interest, but this film is too coy and pedestrian to keep one's attention.
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6/10
Great title ridiculous camera
BandSAboutMovies16 January 2021
Warning: Spoilers
A young nude-model is stabbed to death with a pair of scissors, the third in a series of victims who had all had their photos taken by Parisi, a potentially mentally unhinged individual who claims that his camera can photograph people's thoughts.

Director and writer Helia Colombo made one giallo and here it is, rarely seen outside of Italy until today. It really has the best title - The Police Are Blundering In the Dark - because if you think about it, the police never do a great job in these films.

Now, reporter Giorgio D'Amato meets his friend Enrichetta at the photographer's villa, but when he arrives, he learns that she's the model we watched die at the beginning of the movie.

She'd been begged by Parisi - who is in a wheelchair and looks quite frail - to come to speak to him about his magical camera. And just like Clue - you know, but with plenty of graphic murder and no short supply of nudity - we meet the suspects, ranging from Alberto the butler to the photographer's lesbian wife Eleonora, his niece Sara and the sexed-up maid Lucia, who is the next to be killed.

I have no idea why that camera figures in, but maybe the filmmakers thought that Four Flies On Grey Velvet was going to force everyone to have science fiction photography as part of their plot, so they ripped it off. There's also little police involvement, but it's not like there's an actual rule that giallo titles have to make sense. I prefer when they don't.
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