Basil Fawlty: Your *name*, please, could I have your name?
Lord Melbury: Melbury.
[the phone rings; Basil picks it up]
Basil Fawlty: [to Melbury] One second please.
[to phone]
Basil Fawlty: Hello?... Ah, yes Mr O'Reilly, well it's perfectly simple. When I asked you to build me a wall I was rather hoping that instead of just dumping the bricks in a pile you might have found time to cement them together... you know, one on top of another, in the traditional fashion.
[to Melbury, testily]
Basil Fawlty: Could you fill it in, please?
[to phone]
Basil Fawlty: Oh, splendid! Ah, yes, but *when*, Mr O'Reilly?
[to Melbury, who is having difficulty with the register]
Basil Fawlty: there - there!
[to phone]
Basil Fawlty: Yes, but when? Yes, yes... ah!... the flu!
[to Melbury]
Basil Fawlty: *Both* names, please.
[to phone]
Basil Fawlty: Yes, I should have guessed, Mr. O'Reilly that and the potato famine I suppose...
Lord Melbury: I beg your pardon?
Basil Fawlty: Would you put *both* your names, please?...
[to phone]
Basil Fawlty: Well, will you give me a *date*?
Lord Melbury: Er... I only use one.
Basil Fawlty: [with a withering look] You don't have a first name?
Lord Melbury: No, I am *Lord* Melbury, so I simply sign myself "Melbury".
[there is a long, long pause]
Basil Fawlty: [to phone] Go away.
[puts phone down]
Basil Fawlty: ... I'm *so* sorry to have kept you waiting, your lordship... I *do* apologize, *please* forgive me. Now, was there something, is there something, anything, I can do for you? Anything at all?
