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The Chastity Belt (1972)

Up the Chastity Belt (original title)
PG | | Comedy | 14 January 1972 (UK)
The Queen of England gives birth to twins. In order to protect the blood line one is kept and the other hidden in a pig sty and is raised to think it's mother is the pig. Lurkalot is the ... See full summary »


Bob Kellett


Sid Colin (screenplay), Ray Galton (screenplay) | 1 more credit »




Cast overview, first billed only:
Frankie Howerd ... Richard / Lurkalot
David Kernan ... Troubadour
Nora Swinburne ... The Mistress Of The Bed Chamber - Lady-In-Waiting
Godfrey Winn Godfrey Winn ... The Archbishop Of All England / Archbishop Of All England
Bill Fraser Bill Fraser ... Sir Braggart de Bombast
Anna Quayle ... Lady Ashfodel
Graham Crowden ... Sir Coward de Custard
Anne Aston ... Lobelia
Billy Walker Billy Walker ... Chopper
Royce Mills ... Knotweed
Lally Bowers ... The Voice (voice)
Alec Pleon Alec Pleon ... Man-In-Stocks
Ian Trigger Ian Trigger ... Lucky Charm Seller
Ken Wynne ... First Man
Jimmy Gardner Jimmy Gardner ... Little Man


The Queen of England gives birth to twins. In order to protect the blood line one is kept and the other hidden in a pig sty and is raised to think it's mother is the pig. Lurkalot is the one raised by pigs who doesn't know his past. He makes a good living as a servant, selling chastity belts on the side. When his master's castle is lost to Sir Braggart de Bombast, Lurkalot must fight to protect his daughter, eventually travelling to the missions to bring back his master. On the mission he uncovers that his twin is Richard the Lionheart and he is of Royal stock and must bring them both back. Written by Paul Hunter

Plot Summary | Add Synopsis


Frankie Howerd is the Funniest Knight of the Year!




PG | See all certifications »

Parents Guide:

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Did You Know?


Anne Aston receives an "introducing" credit. See more »


Songwriters Ken Howard and Alan Blaikley are listed in the closing credits as Alan Howard and Ken Blaikley. See more »


Scheherazade: [performing the film's title song] Give me a modern man who knows how it has to be / Not some old miser who's guarding my chastity / Treating his woman as though she were some kind of chattel / It's unnatural / Give me a born true fighter who'll willingly tilt for me / Not some poor flower who'll suddenly wilt when he's hard / Pressed, right in the thick of the battle / Oh for a knight for my nights! / Oh for a knight for my nights! /
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Followed by Up the Front (1972) See more »


Troubadour's Song
Sung by David Kernan
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User Reviews

Don't titter, Madam!
3 September 2003 | by michaeljacobsSee all my reviews

This film is a vehicle for the comedic talents of Frankie Howerd, and if you like his style of humour, the plot is irrelevant. This is a curiously popular movie (it's almost always available on VHS or DVD) considering that there was no TV series to go with it. It was really an extension of Up Pompeii (many of the same people were involved), and feels like it (Lurcio Lurkalot). Frankie's less well-known "Up the Front" (set in WW1) is hardly ever shown or on tape to buy, and the TV show "Whoops, Bagdad" is all but forgotten (possibly with good reason).

Some of the jokes require a knowledge of the state of Britain in the early 1970s, and even if it isn't politically correct by modern standards, most of the audience will be laughing out of nostalgia rather than the freshness of the material, IMHO. When Howerd turns to camera and says "oh, you know this one, don't you", you know that they are going to do the classic open the door in front of the battering ram joke anyway, even though we're all expecting it by then. Many comedians couldn't have carried it off, but that was the age of "camp" comedy. Today, audiences aren't into "camp", which is why so many younger reviewers on this site fail to understand why these films were meant to be funny. (That's why the movie of "The Avengers" was such a horrible failure.)

It is very much a product of its period, but still worth watching today - if you know how to appreciate it.

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Release Date:

14 January 1972 (UK) See more »

Also Known As:

The Chastity Belt See more »

Company Credits

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Technical Specs


Sound Mix:



Color (Technicolor) (as TechnicolorĀ®)

Aspect Ratio:

1.85 : 1
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