Get Carter (1971)
Cliff Brumby: [blocking Carter's path] Listen, I don't like it when some tough nut comes pushin' his way in and out of my house in the middle of the night! Bloody well tell me who sent you!
Jack Carter: You're a big man, but you're in bad shape. With me it's a full time job. Now behave yourself.
[Brumby takes a swing at Carter, who grabs his hand, punches him, and then slaps him in the face for good measure]
Jack Carter: [as he's leaving] Goodnight, Mrs. Brumby.
Jack Carter: You know, I'd almost forgotten what your eyes looked like. Still the same. Pissholes in the snow.
Jack Carter: A pint of bitter
[snaps fingers as bartender walks away]
Jack Carter: ...in a thin glass!
Jack Carter: I'm off tomorrow, so I don't suppose I'll be seeing you again.
Jack Carter: [Pulls out some large banknotes, giving some to Doreen] Here. Go and get your hair done.
Doreen Carter: Thanks!
Jack Carter: Be good... And don't trust boys.
Jack Carter: [naked, pointing a shotgun] Out!
Con McCarty: Come on Jack, put it away. You know you're not going to use it.
Peter: The gun he means!
Eric: So, what're you doing then? On your holidays?
Jack Carter: No, I'm visiting relatives.
Eric: Oh, that's nice.
Jack Carter: It would be... if they were still living.
[Harry, who's playing poker, is disturbed by Carter's presence in the room]
Harry: Thought you were going soon.
Jack Carter: Soon. When you've lost your money. Won't take long.
Harry: Clever sod, aren't you?
Jack Carter: Only comparatively.
[Carter offers to give Keith some money after the latter was beaten up by Carter's enemies and is lying down in bed with his face badly bruised]
Keith: Stuff it! My girlfriend is coming from Liverpool tonight! Nice surprise, isn't it?
Jack Carter: [throwing him the money] Here, go get yourself a course in karate.
Albert: For Christ's sake, Jack!
Jack Carter: You knew what I'd do, didn't you Albert?
Albert: I didn't kill him!
Jack Carter: [stabs Albert] I KNOW YOU DIDN'T KILL HIM! I KNOW!
Jack Carter: Frank wasn't like that. I'm the villain in the family, remember?
Jack Carter: [to Albert] Do you want to be dead Albert?
Edna: [Pointing to a small wooden box that contains Frank's cremated remains] That was left for you this evening... What is it?
Jack Carter: My brother Frank.
Edna: Is he staying the night?
Jack Carter: [not amused] Funny.
Edna: What's that gun doing in your room? Suppose I phone the police, told them there's a bloke in my hotel... who's planning to shoot somebody?
Jack Carter: You wouldn't do that.
Edna: How do you know I wouldn't?
Jack Carter: 'Cause I know you wear purple underwear.
Edna: What's that supposed to mean?
Jack Carter: Think about it.
Architect: [Brumby has suddenly disappeared from his meeting with the architects at the car park building] It's very rude to disappear like that. Where can he possibly be?
Architect: [Sounds of police cars converging on the car park can be heard below] I have an awful feeling we're not going to get our fees on this job.
[Anna is having phone sex with Carter when her husband enters the room]
Gerald Fletcher: What's the matter? You got gut trouble or something?
Anna: No, darling. Just doing my exercises.
[in the phone]
Anna: Listen, Janet, Gerald's just walked in. I must ring off.
Edna: What are you going to do?
Jack Carter: I'm going to sit in the car and whistle "Rule Britannia".
Jack Carter: You couldn't run an egg and spoon race Eric.
Jack Carter: [to Margaret] I've come for you, Margaret.
Con McCarty: [to a naked Jack who is pointing a gun] Jack, don't you think you ought to get dressed first.
Gerald Fletcher: [to Jack] Remember, they're killers. Just like you.
Cliff Brumby: What the bloody hell's all this? Do you know what the bloody time is? It's two o'clock in the bloody morning!
Gerald Fletcher: Bare ass naked with his socks still on?
Sid Fletcher: Yeah, they do it like that - up North.
Gerald Fletcher: What for? For protective purposes?
Jack Carter: I've always had your welfare at heart, Eric. Besides which, I'm nosy.
Eric: Well, that's not always a healthy way to be.
Jack Carter: [on the phone with Anna] I fancy you. I wish I was touching you - right now - making love to you. I want - to stroke you - and kiss you all over. Where are you?
Anna: I'm in the bedroom. My black underwear.
Jack Carter: The sexy, silk ones? Take your bra off.
Anna: Stop it, darling.
Jack Carter: Now. Go on. Now. Now, hold them - gently. Slowly. Imagine it's me. When we're in South America - we'll make love in the sun. Roll over. Make love again - and again.
Jack Carter: Why don't you make us all a nice cup of tea.
Edna: What are you gonna do?
Jack Carter: Make us a cup of tea and I'll tell you. I might even let you watch.
Jack Carter: Alright, I want to square things with you, first.
Keith: [laying in bed, bloody and beat up] Oh, yeah. How?
[Jack holds a hand full of pounds]
Keith: Stuff it! My girlfriend's coming from Liverpool tonight. Nice surprise, isn't it?
Jack Carter: I'm sorry. Here, get yourself a course in karate.
[Jack begins to leave]
Keith: Frank said you were a shit and he was bloody well right! You even screwed his wife, didn't you! The poor bastard didn't even know if the kid was his!
Margaret: I can't help the way I am.
Jack Carter: Why'd you see him so regular?
Margaret: Once a week.
Jack Carter: I call that regular.
Margaret: He was gentlemanly. I like that.
Jack Carter: Once a week, you like a gentleman, do you?
Margaret: Look! I'm me, right? We are what we are, like it or not!
Jack Carter: You bloody whore! Frank was too careful to die like that. Now, who killed him?
Margaret: I don't know nothing!
Jack Carter: Listen, the only reason I came back to this crap house - was to find out who did it. And I'm not leaving until I do.
Glenda: You didn't know you had a fairy godmother, did you?
Jack Carter: No, frankly, I didn't know that.
Glenda: A fairy godmother - all of your own. Aren't you lucky?
Jack Carter: Yeah. So, where are we going, princess?
Glenda: To the demon king's castle, of course.
Jack Carter: Of course. Where else.
Jack Carter: How did you know where I'd be?
Glenda: You were seen parking your car. The demon king waived his wand and I was dispatched to bring you to him. Lucky for you, I waited.
Jack Carter: Very lucky, I should think. You're drunk!
Jack Carter: He must have been pretty sure I'd come.
Glenda: Oh, he was! He told me a magic spell that would make you come.
Cliff Brumby: You know my life: machines, the arcades. It's a nice business. It runs itself! People put money in - and I take it out. There's not much rough stuff. It's a business that makes me very happy.