Kiss Me Monster

As terrible as it was, I enjoyed this in a perverse "oh god, I could do better than that" kinda way. The guys who looked and acted like they'd flunked the Thunderbirds casting call. The dubbing that made me grateful that chop socky cheapos weren't dubbed in Germany by unemployed bierfest toastmasters. The stock footage that made me pine for the infamous white Jag 3.4 going over the cliff again again. The flashless guns that somehow kill people they're not aimed at (Did Roy Rogers ever patent them?) And the bouffantastic hairstyles that screamed "WIIIIIIIIIIIG!!!!!" loud enough to influence Divine and Joan Collins.

Somehow, I understood what little evidence of plot there was. This can probably be put down to a childhood diet of duff mangas and creaky Godzilla movies. The idea is that they get from scene one to finale without being mangled by the badddies. Erm, that's it. My brain barely broke sweat, but my funnybone was in overdrive. I'm not going to give it a post modern ironic 10, but the 5 is praise for making me hoot with incredulous laughter at the lapses in acting ability, plot, and continuity. The soundtrack is surprisingly cool. The band in the disco seem to be performing an excellent ersatz Detroit r n b breaks medley, and the kooky jazz pieces seemed seemed perfectly apt in context.

I've seen worse.