Kiss the Girls and Make Them Die
In this spoof of spy films, CIA agent, Kelly, is in Rio De Janeiro spying on a wealthy industrialist, David Ardonian, who secretly plans to turn the world sterile and repopulate it with his ... Read allIn this spoof of spy films, CIA agent, Kelly, is in Rio De Janeiro spying on a wealthy industrialist, David Ardonian, who secretly plans to turn the world sterile and repopulate it with his harem. UK spy, Susan Fleming, helps Kelly.In this spoof of spy films, CIA agent, Kelly, is in Rio De Janeiro spying on a wealthy industrialist, David Ardonian, who secretly plans to turn the world sterile and repopulate it with his harem. UK spy, Susan Fleming, helps Kelly.
- Kelly
- (as Michael Connors)
The exotic locations in Brazil are pretty good; as mentioned in other comments, some of this, including some plot points, seems to have been copied by an actual later Bond film, "Moonraker," though one could argue this happened because this copies earlier Bond films such as "Thunderball" and "Dr.No." The story has some slow parts in the first half, meandering as the hero follows villains and vice-versa. This is reflected in the film's music score, which has a lazy, easy style to it, even during action sequences. As the hero, Connors also ambles his way through, usually laconic or sarcastic, depending on the scene, but projecting toughness. This was just before he began his 8-year run as tough TV private eye "Mannix." To give you an idea of the humor, there's a recurring theme of the hero's fondness for bananas. Things pick up in the latter half when the action shifts to the sci-fi stronghold of the villain. I've heard that this film is a favorite of Quentin Tarantino's. Hero:6 Villains:6 Femme Fatales:6 Henchmen:6 Fights:7 Stunts/Chases:6 Gadgets:6 Auto:4 Locations:7 Pace:6 overall:6
- Bogmeister
- Apr 25, 2008
- Permalink
Storyline
Did you know
- TriviaMike Connors has said that he performed the stunt where he hangs from a rope attached to a helicopter flying around the Christ the Redeemer Statue because a local Brazilian stuntman refused to do it.
- Quotes
Ling: [Ardonian and Soong have made it to the launch site together as the Chinese delegation has requested.Deputy Chairman Ling walks up to Ardonian and says] these are the specifications for putting the device inside the rocket
Mr. Ardonian: [Ardonian takes the plans and thanks him then he says] I'd like to congratulate you on your great victory only five revolutions around the North American continent and their civilization will begin to go into a decline.
Ling: [He says] yes this will be a great victory over the Americans
Mr. Ardonian: [Ardonian says] the rocket will launch in exactly one hour. I understand that certain members of your government feel I will use the device against other countries including your own. So I want Miss Soong to translate so there are no misunderstandings.
[Soong, who came to the meeting with Ardonian is suprised but remains silent. She reaches over and pulls out her microphone . Soong who is sitting slightly apart from the delegation watchs as all the Chinese delegation put on headphones.She wore the very best of her finery. It's a traditional Chinese dress red with white flowers on it. Short sleeves and knee length with slits up both sides. The dress is very tight fitting.She wore white heels and a matching white hand bag. She is wearing very sheer flesh toned stockings]
Mr. Ardonian: Miss Soong should have noticed this is the second time she has been here and second time translating. This time there are two of Ardonian's guards who are armed and the large portal doorway next to her is open. This door was s closed the last time And there were no guards.
Wilma Soong: [Soong is confused as Ardonian didn't notify her this was going to happen. So Soong Is completely in the the dark on this. She will sit and wait for this to develope. So she is following Ardonian's lead]
Mr. Ardonian: [Ardonian says] I want you to be perfectly clear on this and I want to eleaviate your worries once an for all
[He turns up a switch and electrocutes the Chinese delegation]
Mr. Ardonian: ELECTRICAL BUUUUZZZZZ .
[They are all dead leaning back in their chairs with their eyes wide open looking up at the ceiling with their mouths open their heads leaning backwards. They look like a pile of dead mackerel at the fish store]
Wilma Soong: [Soong leaps to her feet and jumps up on the higher level of seating, she is in complete disbelief she is still holding her microphone she looks over at the Chinese delegation and they all have their heads tilted back eyes looking straight up mouths wide open. Soong is gawking and her mouth is wide open. She can only make a gasping sound] gasping sound
[then Soong looks back over at the delegation still cannot fathom what has happened. She looks over at Ardonian and let's out with a shrill screech]
Wilma Soong: shrill screech Soong is starting to hyperventilate and is going into shock she says to Ardonian
[Then she is hyperventilating and gasps]
Wilma Soong: gasp
[Soong can't believe how the seven man delegation are all looking up with their eyes wide open looking b up and their mouths wide open]
Mr. Ardonian: [Ardonian looks over at the Chinese delegation and thinks he has completely fooled them getting the much needed rocket he needed to sterilize the world .He lets out a very sinister laugh] very sinister laugh
[Ardonian wasn't happy that the Chinese held him up and kept him wondering twhen and if they were going to agree to his pla.Then his attention turns to Miss Soong. Ardonian starts to look at Soong up and down as she stands there hysterically hyperventilating, nothing like the very cool sly fox that was in his office only a few hours earlier.]
Wilma Soong: [Soong looks at Ardonian and finally drops her microphone and screams out] WHY, WHY
[she starts to charge Ardonian. She is having a very hard time breathing and she is taking very deep breaths]
Mr. Ardonian: [Two of Ardonian's guards grab Soong one under each arm. Between the jumping up to her feet and the guards grabbing her arms Soong's dress is pulled skin tight on her. Ardonian looks at the extremely nervous hyperventilating Soong and let's out with another] very sinister laugh .
[Directed at Soong. He says to Soong]
Mr. Ardonian: you should be very grateful you are still alive. Ardonian. gives Soong a very sinister laugh.
[Soong doesn't answer him but continues to breathe deeply her chest heaving up and down. Soong's breasts are heaving up and down with her deep breaths. Her dress is very tight on her chest and her belly. Ardonian looks Soong all over.She has a very perplexed look on her face trying to figure out what has happened. Only a minute ago she was finishing up this assignment now what?He turns to the guards saying]
Mr. Ardonian: Take her to the preparation room they are expecting her and they know what to do with her.And after she has been prepared bring her to my laboratory I want her taken care of as soon as possible
[Ardonian looks at Soong and yells]
Mr. Ardonian: OUT ! Ardonian was watching Soong's breasts heave up and down . He knows exactly what he is going to have done to Soong and how humiliated she will be.
[the guards turn and one grabs Soong's bag and start to walk Soong away. Soong is fighting them but she is completely powerless against the two powerful men. All she knows is she is being taken to a preparation room to be prepared and prepared for what ? Only earlier Soong had promised Ardonian that once this mission was complete they would have time for other things and she gave him a very sexy smile - letting Ardonian know once the mission was over she was going to be wined and dined by him and bedded. She cannot understand why he tricked them and murdered her bosses and what is he going to do to her. Soong didn't know that Ardonian was going to cook her goose and give her the works ! Within the hour Ardonian will make Soong look far more ridiculous than her comrades from the Chinese delegation sitting with there heads back eyes wide open and mouths open wide. The room guards take Soongto the preparationroomand they met two more of Ardonian's guards who quickly start to remove Soong's dress, then they remove her shoes, her slip, then her stockings bra and panties. Soongis nude and they place an ill fitting yellow robe on her.]
- ConnectionsEdited into Operation: Secret Agents, Spies & Thighs (2007)
- SoundtracksBacia E Uccidi (Kiss The Girls And Make Them Die)
Music by Mario Nascimbene, Lyrics by Howard Greenfield
Sung by Lydia MacDonald accompanied by Mario Nascimbene Orchestra
Details
- Runtime1 hour 46 minutes
- Aspect ratio
- 1.85 : 1
Contribute to this page
