Babes in Toyland (1961)
Toymaker: Do you Mary take this man to be your husband?
Mary Contrary: I do.
Toymaker: That's funny. I'd take him to be your grandfather.
Barnaby: For lunch, I had roast goose!
Sylvester: That's the way we lost mother.
Gonzorgo: We don't know how to tell you this, Miss Mary. No, we don't know how to tell you this at all. We were 20 leagues at sea and it was calm as it could be, when out of the north, there came a sudden squall! He was standing at the wheel he was, Miss Mary, and across the deck, the might ocean roared, and the mizzen broke and fell and we heard the fellow yell as it bashed him down and swept him overboard!
Gonzorgo: Slowly, slowly, he sank into the sea! Though we tried to save him, he sank into the sea!
Mary Contrary: But who, sir? Who sank?
Gonzorgo: It was Tom, ma'am. Tom sank.
Mary Contrary: Tom sank?
Mother Goose: Tom sank?
Sylvester: Who's Tom Sank?
Barnaby: What preposterous rumor are you spreading, sailors? Go on your way, unless you have some evidence, some proof for what you say?
Gonzorgo: Oh, yes, sir!
Mary Contrary: What proof do you have?
Gonzorgo: We are bringing you his personal belongings, and in his hat, we found this soggy note. Though the salty ocean spray somehow washed the words away, I'll see if I can't decipher what he wrote. "Darling Mary," he begins, or is that "dearest"? Yes, that's term he uses we agree. Now the boy goes on to tell how he hopes this finds you well. It's too bad he slowly sank into the sea.
Gonzorgo: Slowly, slowly, he sank into the sea! With no life preserver, he sank into the sea!
Mary Contrary: But this was to be our wedding day. Why would Tom be at sea?
Barnaby: Does this letter offer some explanation? I presume he's written more?
Gonzorgo: Oh, yes, sir! "I am poor," the letter reads, "and can't support you, and it's best I sail away to set you free. Noble lady that you are, you'd be better off by far if you were to marry wealthy Barnaby." We advice you to forget him now, Miss Mary, though our condolences to you we will extend, but we'll blame you not, my dear, if you care to shed a tear for the way he met his most untimely end.
Gonzorgo: Slowly, slowly, he sank into the sea! To the very bottom, he sank into the sea!
[Rodrigo suddenly sinks in the puddle and then slowly comes back up. Gonzorgo tries to find the hole, but can't]
Sylvester: How about that!
Mary Contrary: [near tears] Oh, my poor brave Tom, sacrificing his life for my welfare!
Mother Goose: Poor Mary. Come, children, in the house.
Sylvester: There's something fishy about this!
Mother Goose: Hush, Sylvester!
Sylvester: Well, I wouldn't trust either one of them, the fat one or the idiot!
Sylvester: Hello, everybody. My name is Sylvester, Sylvester J. Goose. My friends call me Syl, or sometimes silly.
Sylvester: At this time, it is with unmitigated pleasure...
Mother Goose: [behind curtain] Sylvester, talk faster.
Sylvester: "Talk faster"? You're lucky to find a goose who can talk at all! As I was saying, it is my pleasure to present your hostess for this occasion, weighing one hundred and eighty nine pounds...
Mother Goose: Sylvester!
Sylvester: Hmph! I present the one and only Mother Goose.
[Mother Goose enters]
Mother Goose: Thank you, Sylvester.
[under her breath]
Mother Goose: Blabbermouth.
Mother Goose: I'm here to invite you to a celebration in our village. Tomorrow is the wedding of Tom and Mary.
Sylvester: Two of my closest friends.
Mother Goose: I know. So put on your best smile, set free your imagination, and come with us to Mother Goose Village. Sylvester?
Sylvester: Alright, boys, open the curtains!
Toymaker: Oh, for heaven's sakes! Such a dreadful temper! I'm glad I'm not marrying you! Well, I am marrying you, but I'm marrying you to her.
Barnaby: Not yet, boys. The odds will be better when they're sleeping. We'll wait till nightfall. Come, let us lurk!
Barnaby: Night is about to fall. Five, four, three, two, one.
[darkness suddenly drops over the sky]
Mother Goose: Now, let's see. There's something borrowed, something blue...
Barnaby: Good day, friends.
Sylvester: And here's something old and ugly too.
Toymaker: We are gathered here today to witness this young lady making her first step toward unhappiness. She's gonna marry you.
Toymaker: Do you Barnaby take Mary to be your wedded wife? To keep her in sickness, in adversity, in poverty, in tragedy, in disaster...
Barnaby: What are you doing?
Toymaker: Well, I was just trying to talk you out of it.
Toymaker: Do you, Barnaby, take Mary to be your wedded wife?
Barnaby: I do.
Toymaker: Are you sure you don't want to think this over?
Toymaker: [to Grumio about his toy-making invention which got destroyed] Did you say your invention was to make toys or to make noise?
Toymaker: You know something? I think we should go to lunch!
Toymaker: [Grumio wants to show the Toymaker one of his inventions] This is one of your inventions?
Grumio: Yes, sir!
Toymaker: Shoot me!
Gonzorgo: Look, Roderigo, a gypsy camp. Gypsies, eh? I've heard it said that gypsies buy babies. I wonder if they'd be interested in purchasing this fine, strapping youth?
[Tom tries to wake but Roderigo hits on the head with a mallet, putting him back to sleep]
Gonzorgo: Roderigo, I have an idea. Why don't we sell Tom to the gypsies and that way collect for him twice, understand?
[Roderigo shakes his head]
Gonzorgo: Listen, Barnaby is paying us to get rid of Tom, but if instead of throwing Tom into the sea, we sell him to the gypsies, we'll be paid for him again. Once by Barnaby and once by the gypsies. Can't you see that?
[Roderigo nods ecstatically]
Barnaby: I don't mind a double-cross and I don't mind a triple-cross, but see that you execute no quadruple-cross. For this, to me, is insincerity.
Barnaby: [hits Gonzorgo and Roderigo's open hands with his cane] Not now! Tomorrow, when the swelling goes down. Be in my attic when the bank opens.
Barnaby: Item 1:
Gonzorgo: Item 1:
Barnaby: Kidnap Tom.
Gonzorgo: [to Roderigo who is writing down the plan] Kidnap Tom.
[Roderigo makes a motion across his throat with a pencil]
Gonzorgo: No, just kidnap him.
Barnaby: Item Two:
Gonzorgo: Item Two:
Barnaby: Throw him in the sea.
Gonzorgo: [to Roderigo] Throw him in the sea.
[Roderigo again makes a motion to about killing Tom]
Gonzorgo: No, no, just throw him in the sea!
Barnaby: Item Three...
Gonzorgo: Item Three...
Barnaby: Mary's sheep. These sheep support her. Somehow, I must thwart her. She's much too independent with them, therefore, she must be without them. Steal the sheep!
Gonzorgo: [to Roderigo] Steal the sheep!
[Roderigo makes a repeated stabbing motion with his pencil]
Barnaby: [grabs Roderigo around the neck using his cane] No, *steal* them!
Floretta the Gypsy: [about Barnaby while beating and bending his hand] Now this is the palm of a cad. A sly reprobate and a mean one. Corrupt and malicious. Conniving and vicious! A scoundrel if ever I've seen one.
[honks Barnaby's nose]
Floretta the Gypsy: He seeks a young maid for his wife while plotting her sweetheart's abduction.
[beating Barnaby's hand]
Floretta the Gypsy: The crimes he's involved in will one day be solved and result in his utter destruction!
Wedding Guests: [singing last lines] Tom and Mary, Tom and Mary / Goodbye, good luck to you / Tom and Mary, Tom and Mary / Your beautiful dream has come true / Two lives blended as intended / While all the world, in tune / Smiles divinely for you're finally / On your honeymoon.
[Barnaby has planned to use the shrinking gun on Tom and he asks Gonzorgo and Roderigo to accompany him, but the now-shrunken Toymaker manages to convince them otherwise]
Barnaby: I beg your pardon?
Gonzorgo: After talking things over, we have decided not to take part in your diabolical plan. Consider us no longer in cahoots. Furthermore, we are going to expose you to everybody.
Barnaby: [leveling the shrinking gun at his henchmen] Won't you reconsider?
Gonzorgo: Not a chance!
Gonzorgo: Now, there's no use in talking about it! We want nothing more to do with it!
Tom Piper: That's right children, we've been playing with the toys.
Toymaker: [laughing] That's right. We were just playing with the toys.