The Wizard of Oz (1939)
Dorothy: How can you talk, if you haven't got a brain?
The Scarecrow: I don't know. But, some people without brains do an awful lot of talking, don't they?
Dorothy: Yes. I guess, you're right.
The Wicked Witch of the West: Just try and stay out of my way. Just try! I'll get you, my pretty, and your little dog, too!
The Wizard of Oz: A heart is not judged by how much you love; but by how much you are loved by others.
Dorothy: [has just arrived in Oz, looking around and awed at the beauty and splendor] Toto, I've a feeling we're not in Kansas any more.
Dorothy: [after a pause] We must be over the rainbow!
[a bubble appears in the sky and gets closer and closer. It finally lands, then turns into Glinda the Good Witch wearing a spectacular white dress and crown, holding a wand]
Dorothy: [to Toto] Now I... I know we're not in Kansas!
Auntie Em: Almira Gulch, just because you own half the county doesn't mean that you have the power to run the rest of us. For 23 years, I've been dying to tell you what I thought of you, and now... well, being a Christian woman, I can't say it!
Miss Gulch: [stopping bicycle and getting off] Gale?
Uncle Henry: Well, howdy, Miss Gulch.
Miss Gulch: [comes into the Gale's yard] I want to see you and your wife right away about Dorothy.
Uncle Henry: Dorothy? Well, what has Dorothy done?
Miss Gulch: What she's done? I'm all but lame from the bite on my leg!
Uncle Henry: You mean she bit you?
Miss Gulch: No, her dog!
Uncle Henry: Oh, she bit her dog, eh?
[Uncle Henry lets go of the gate, it hits Miss Gulch on the backside]
Miss Gulch: [exasperated] No!
The Wizard of Oz: Pay no attention to that man behind the curtain.
[Dorothy watches the Wicked Witch melt]
The Wicked Witch of the West: [her final lines] You cursed brat! Look what you've done! I'm melting! melting! Oh, what a world! What a world! Who would have thought a good little girl like you could destroy my beautiful wickedness? Oooooh, look out! I'm going! Oooooh! Ooooooh!
The Wizard of Oz: As for you, my galvanized friend, you want a heart. You don't know how lucky you are not to have one. Hearts will never be practical until they can be made unbreakable.
The Tin Man: But, I... I still want one.
The Scarecrow: I've got a plan how to get in there.
The Cowardly Lion: Fine. He's got a plan.
The Scarecrow: And you're going to lead us.
The Cowardly Lion: Yeah... me?
The Scarecrow: Yes, you.
The Cowardly Lion: I... I gotta get her out of there?
The Tin Man: That's right.
The Cowardly Lion: [determined] All right. I'll go in there for Dorothy. Wicked Witch or no Wicked Witch, guards or no guards, I'll tear them apart. I may not come out alive, but I'm going in there. There's only one thing I want you fellas to do.
The Cowardly Lion: Talk me out of it.
The Wizard of Oz: Why, anybody can have a brain. That's a very mediocre commodity. Every pusillanimous creature that crawls on the Earth or slinks through slimy seas has a brain. Back where I come from, we have universities, seats of great learning, where men go to become great thinkers. And when they come out, they think deep thoughts and with no more brains than you have. But they have one thing you haven't got: a diploma.
Glinda: You have no power here! Begone, before somebody drops a house on you, too!
Dorothy: Your Majesty, if you were king, you wouldn't be afraid of anything?
The Cowardly Lion: Not nobody! Not nohow!
The Tin Man: Not even a rhinoceros?
The Cowardly Lion: Imposerous!
Dorothy: How about a hippopotamus?
The Cowardly Lion: Why, I'd thrash him from top to bottomus!
Dorothy: Supposing you met an elephant?
The Cowardly Lion: I'd wrap him up in cellophant!
The Scarecrow: What if it were a brontosaurus?
The Cowardly Lion: I'd show him who was king of the forest!
Dorothy: Oh, but anyway, Toto, we're home. Home! And this is my room, and you're all here. And I'm not gonna leave here ever, ever again, because I love you all, and - oh, Auntie Em - there's no place like home!
The Wizard of Oz: Back where I come from there are men who do nothing all day but good deeds. They are called phila... er, phila... er, yes, er, Good Deed Doers.
Dorothy: [singing] Somewhere Over The Rainbow, Bluebirds fly. Birds fly Over The Rainbow. Why then, oh why can't I? If happy little bluebirds fly beyond the rainbow, why oh why cant I?
The Wizard of Oz: [to the Lion] As for you, my fine friend, you're a victim of disorganized thinking. You are under the unfortunate delusion that simply because you run away from danger, you have no courage. You're confusing courage with wisdom.
The Scarecrow: I haven't got a brain... only straw.
Dorothy: How can you talk if you haven't got a brain?
The Scarecrow: I don't know... But some people without brains do an awful lot of talking... don't they?
Dorothy: Yes, I guess you're right.
Dorothy: Now which way do we go?
The Scarecrow: Pardon me, this way is a very nice way.
Dorothy: Who said that?
[Toto barks at scarecrow]
Dorothy: Don't be silly, Toto. Scarecrows don't talk.
The Scarecrow: [points other way] It's pleasant down that way, too.
Dorothy: That's funny. Wasn't he pointing the other way?
The Scarecrow: [points both ways] Of course, some people do go both ways.
Dorothy: [to the Scarecrow] I think I'll miss you most of all.
The Cowardly Lion: Courage! What makes a king out of a slave? Courage! What makes the flag on the mast to wave? Courage! What makes the elephant charge his tusk in the misty mist, or the dusky dusk? What makes the muskrat guard his musk? Courage! What makes the sphinx the seventh wonder? Courage! What makes the dawn come up like thunder? Courage! What makes the Hottentot so hot? What puts the "ape" in apricot? What have they got that I ain't got?
The Cowardly Lion: You can say that again! Huh?
The Scarecrow: Help! Help! Help!
[the Flying Monkeys walking away, Tin Man and the Lion comes to him]
The Tin Man: Well, what happened to you?
The Scarecrow: They tore my legs off and they threw it over there! Then, they took my chest off and they threw it over there!
The Tin Man: Well, that's you all over.
The Cowardly Lion: They sure knocked the stuffings out of you, didn't they?
The Scarecrow: Don't stand there talking, put me together. We've got to find Dorothy.
[the Tin Man and the Lion trying the fix the Scarecrow]
The Tin Man: Now, let's see.
Munchkin Coroner: [singing] As Coroner I must aver, I thoroughly examined her, and she's not only merely dead, she's really most sincerely dead.
The Scarecrow: The sum of the square roots of any two sides of an isosceles triangle is equal to the square root of the remaining side. Oh joy! Rapture! I got a brain! How can I ever thank you enough?
The Wizard of Oz: Well, you can't.
Dorothy: My goodness, what a fuss you're making! Well naturally, when you go around picking on things weaker than you are. Why, you're nothing but a great big coward!
The Cowardly Lion: [crying] You're right, I am a coward! I haven't any courage at all. I even scare myself.
The Cowardly Lion: Look at the circles under my eyes. I haven't slept in weeks!
The Tin Man: Why don't you try counting sheep?
The Cowardly Lion: That doesn't do any good, I'm afraid of 'em.
The Scarecrow: Aw, that's too bad.
The Cowardly Lion: I do believe in spooks, I do believe in spooks. I do, I do, I do, I do believe in spooks, I do believe in spooks, I do, I do, I do, I do!
The Wicked Witch of the West: Ah! You'll believe in more than that before I'm finished with you.
Auntie Em: Help us out today and find yourself a place where you won't get into any trouble!
Dorothy: A place where there isn't any trouble. Do you suppose there is such a place, Toto? There must be. It's not a place you can get to by a boat or a train. It's far, far away. Behind the moon, beyond the rain...
[begins to sing "Over the Rainbow"]
Dorothy: It really was no miracle. What happened was just this...
Dorothy: [singing] The wind began to switch / The house, to pitch / And suddenly the hinges started to unhitch / Just then the Witch / To satisfy an itch / Went flying on her broomstick, thumbing for a hitch!
Munchkin: And, oh, what happened then was rich!
Munchkins: [singing] The house began to pitch / The kitchen took a slich / It landed on the Wicked Witch in the middle of a ditch / Which was not a happy situation for the Wicked Witch!
Dorothy: Did you say something?
[indiscernible sounds from the Tin Man, who is rusted]
Dorothy: He said oil can!
The Scarecrow: Oil can what?
Dorothy: Oil can.
The Cowardly Lion: [singing] If I were king of the fore-e-e-est / Not queen, not duke, not prince / My regal robes of the fore-e-e-est / Would be satin, not cotton, not chintz / I'd command each thing, whether fish or fowl / With a r-r-ruff and a r-r-ruff, and a royal growl - R-R-Ruff! / As I click my heels / All the trees would kneel / And the mountains bow / And the bulls kowtow / And the sparrow would take wing / If I, if I were ki-i-i-i-ng! / The rabbits would show respect to me / The chipmunks genuflect to me / Though my tail would lash / I would show compash / For every underling / If I, if I were king / Just ki-i-i-i-ing!
Captain of the Winkie Guard: [after the Wicked Witch has melted] She's... She's dead. You killed her.
Dorothy: I didn't mean to kill her. Really, I didn't. It's just that he was on fire.
Captain of the Winkie Guard: Hail to Dorothy! The Wicked Witch is dead!
The Winkies: [all kneel before Dorothy] *Hail*! Hail to Dorothy! The Wicked Witch is dead!
Dorothy: The broom! May we have it?
Captain of the Winkie Guard: [hands Dorothy the broomstick] Please. And take it with you.
Dorothy: Oh, thank you so much! Now we can go back to the Wizard, and tell him the Wicked Witch is dead!
The Winkies: The Wicked Witch is dead!
The Tin Man: What have you learned, Dorothy?
Dorothy: Well, I - I think that it - it wasn't enough to just want to see Uncle Henry and Auntie Em - and it's that - if I ever go looking for my heart's desire again, I won't look any further than my own back yard. Because if it isn't there, I never really lost it to begin with! Is that right?
The Cowardly Lion: Put 'em up, put 'em up! Which one of you first? I'll fight you both together if you want. I'll fight you with one paw tied behind my back. I'll fight you standing on one foot. I'll fight you with my eyes closed... ohh, pullin' an axe on me, eh? Sneaking up on me, eh? Why, I'll... Ruff!
The Wicked Witch of the West: Going so soon? I wouldn't hear of it. Why my little party's just beginning.
The Gatekeeper: Orders are nobody can see the Great Oz! Not nobody, not nohow!
Dorothy: Goodbye, Tinman. Oh, don't cry! You'll rust so dreadfully. Here's your oil can.
The Tin Man: Now I know I've got a heart, 'cause it's breaking...
Dorothy: Goodbye, Lion. I know it isn't right, but I'm going to miss the way you used to hollar for help before you found your courage.
The Cowardly Lion: I never would've found it if it hadn't been for you...
Dorothy: [to Scarecrow] I think I'm going to miss you most of all.
The Wizard of Oz: They have one thing you haven't got: a diploma. Therefore, by virtue of the authority vested in me by the Universitartus Committiartum E Pluribus Unum, I hereby confer upon you the honorary degree of ThD.
The Scarecrow: ThD?
The Wizard of Oz: That's... Doctor of Thinkology.
The Wizard of Oz: As for you, my galvanized friend, you want a heart. You don't know how lucky you are not to have one. Hearts will never be practical until they can be made unbreakable.
Dorothy: [Toto is held hostage by the Witch and one of her monkeys] What are you gonna do to my dog? Give him back to me!
The Wicked Witch of the West: All in good time, my little pretty. All in good time.
Dorothy: Oh, please give me back my dog?
The Wicked Witch of the West: Certainly. Certainly. When you give me those slippers.
Dorothy: But, The Good Witch of the North told me not to.
The Wicked Witch of the West: Very well.
[to her flying monkey]
The Wicked Witch of the West: Throw that basket into the river and drown him!
Dorothy: No, no, no! Here... You can have your old slippers. But, give me back Toto!
The Wicked Witch of the West: That's a good little girl. I know you'd see reason!
[the Witch stoops to steal the shoes. But, fire burns Dorothy's toes and the Witch's hands. she reacts in pain]
The Wicked Witch of the West: Ohhhh!
Dorothy: I'm sorry! I didn't do it. Can I still have my dog?
The Wicked Witch of the West: No! Fool that I am! I should have remembered! Those slippers will never come off as long as you're alive. But's that not what's worrying me. It's how to do it. These things must be done delicately or you hurt the spell.
Munchkin Mayor: Then this is a day of independence for all the Munchkins and their descendants!
Munchkin: If any!
Munchkin Mayor: Yes - let the joyous news be spread! The Wicked Old Witch at last is dead!
Dorothy: What would you do with a brain if you had one?
[Dorothy, the Scarecrow, and the Tin Man watch as the Wicked Witch of the West vanishes into a fireball]
The Scarecrow: I'm not afraid of her! I'll see you get safely to the Wizard now, whether I get a brain or not. Stuff a mattress with me. Ha!
The Tin Man: I'll see you reach the Wizard, whether I get a heart or not. Beehive, bah! Let her try and make a beehive out of me!
Dorothy: Oh, you're the best friends anybody ever had. And it's funny, but I feel as if I'd known you all the time, but I couldn't have, could I?
The Scarecrow: I don't see how. You weren't around when I was stuffed and sewn together, were you?
The Tin Man: And I was standing over there, rusting for the longest time.
Dorothy: Still, I wish I could remember, but I guess it doesn't matter anyway. We know each other now, don't we?
The Scarecrow: That's right.
The Tin Man: We do.
The Scarecrow: To Oz?
The Tin Man: To Oz.
Dorothy: [Reaches to pick an apple from the apple tree, the tree grabs the apple and slaps her hand] Ouch!
Angry Apple Tree: What do you think you're doing?
Dorothy: We've been walking a long ways and I was hungry and... did you say something?
Angry Apple Tree: She was hungry!
Apple Tree: [Repeating after The Angry Apple Tree] She was hungry!
Angry Apple Tree: Well, how would you like to have someone come along and pick something off of you?
Dorothy: Oh, dear! I keep forgetting I'm not in Kansas!
The Scarecrow: Come along, Dorothy. You don't want any of those apples!
Dorothy: [as the Wizard's balloon goes off without her] Come back! Come back! Don't go without me! Please come back!
The Wizard of Oz: I can't come back, I don't know how it works! Good-bye, folks!
The Wicked Witch of the West: How about a little fire, Scarecrow?
Glinda: Are you a good witch, or a bad witch?
Dorothy: I'm not a witch at all. I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas.
Glinda: Oh. Well, is that the witch?
Dorothy: Who, Toto? Toto's my dog!
Dorothy: Oh please, Professor, why can't we go with you and see all the Crowned Heads of Europe?
Professor Marvel: Do you know any? Oh, you mean the... thing. Yes.
[Dorothy is brought to the Witch's castle]
The Wicked Witch of the West: What a nice little dog. And you, my dear, what an unexpected pleasure. It's so kind of you to want to visit me in my loneliness.
The Wicked Witch of the West: Who killed my sister? Who killed the Witch of the East? Was it you?
Dorothy: No, no. It was an accident. I didn't mean to kill anybody.
The Wicked Witch of the West: Well, my little pretty, I can cause accidents, too!
The Scarecrow: Witch? Huh, I'm not afraid of a witch. I'm not afraid of anything... Except a lighted match.
[points to the straw in his arm]
Dorothy: I don't blame you for that.
Dorothy: Oh, Thank you so much! We've been gone such a long time and we feel so messy... What kind of a horse is that? I've never seen a horse like that before!
The Carriage Driver: And never will again, I fancy. There's only one of him and he's it. He's the Horse of a Different Color, you've heard tell about.
Auntie Em: Here, here, what's all this jabber-wapping when there's work to be done? I know three shiftless farmhands that'll be out of a job before they know it.
'Hickory': Well, Dorothy was walking along...
Auntie Em: I saw you tinkering with that contraption, Hickory! Now you and Hunk get back to that wagon.
'Hickory': All right, Mrs. Gale. But someday, they're going to erect a statue to me in this town, and...
Auntie Em: Well, don't start posing for it now!
The Cowardly Lion: [singing] I'd be brave as a blizzard...
The Tin Man: [singing] I'd be gentle as a lizard...
The Scarecrow: [singing] I'd be clever as a gizzard...
Dorothy: [singing] If the Wizard is a wizard who will serve.
The Scarecrow: [singing] Then I'm sure to get a brain...
The Tin Man: [singing] A heart...
Dorothy: [singing] A home...
The Cowardly Lion: [singing] The nerve!
The Cowardly Lion: Read what my medal says: "Courage". Ain't it the truth? Ain't it the truth?
The Tin Man: Help! Help!
The Scarecrow: It's no use screaming at a time like this. Nobody will hear you. Help! Help!
Dorothy: I've got a witch mad at me and you might get into trouble!
Dorothy: She isn't coming yet, Toto. Did she hurt you? She tried to, didn't she? Come on. We'll go tell Uncle Henry and Auntie Em.
The Winkies: [singing repeatedly] O-Ee-Yah! Eoh-Ah!
Dorothy: [in the Wizard's Throne Room with the three others, having returned from the Witch's castle] Please, sir. We've done what you told us. We brought you the broomstick of the Wicked Witch of the West. We melted her!
The Wizard of Oz: Oh, you liquidated her, eh? Very resourceful!
Miss Gulch: If you don't hand over that dog, I'll bring a damage suit that'll take your whole farm! There's a law protecting folks against dogs that bite!
Auntie Em: How would it be if she keeps him tied up? He's really gentle... with gentle people, that is.
The Wizard of Oz: Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain! The greatest Oz has spoken!
The Wizard of Oz: [in a booming voice] Step forward, Tin Man!
The Tin Man: [terrified, steps forward] Ohhhh!
The Wizard of Oz: [still in a booming voice] You DARE to come to me for a heart, do you? You clinking, clanking, clattering collection of caligenous junk!
The Tin Man: Yes, sir. Yes, your honor. You see... a while back, we were walking down the yellow brick road. And...
The Wizard of Oz: [booming voice] Quiet!
Dorothy: Weren't you frightened?
The Wizard of Oz: Frightened? Child, you're talking to a man who's laughed in the face of death, sneered at doom, and chuckled at catastrophe... I was petrified.
The Scarecrow: [singing] I could while away the hours/conferrin' with the flowers/consultin' with the rain/And my head I'd be scratchin'/ While my thoughts were busy hatchin'/If I only had a brain.
The Wicked Witch of the West: But that's not what's worrying me. It's how to do it. These things must be done delicately... or you hurt the spell.
Auntie Em: Now you go feed those hogs before they worry themselves into anemia!
'Zeke': [to pigs] Get in there, before I make a dime bank out of you.
Professor Marvel: Better get under cover, Sylvester. There's a storm blowin' up - a whopper, to speak in the vernacular of the peasantry. Poor little kid, I hope she gets home all right.
The Wicked Witch of the West: The last to go will see the first three go before her. And her mangy little dog too.
The Cowardly Lion: I- I- I hope my strength holds out.
The Tin Man: [hanging by Lion's tail] I hope your tail holds out!
The Cowardly Lion: I'll get you anyway, Pee-wee.
[Chases Toto; Dorothy hits him on the nose]
Dorothy: Shame on you!
The Cowardly Lion: [sobbing] Why did you do that for? I didn't bite him.
Dorothy: No, but you tried to. It's bad enough picking on a straw man, but picking on a little dog.
The Cowardly Lion: Well, you didn't have to go and hit me! Is my nose bleeding?
Dorothy: Well, of course not.
Manicurist in Emerald City: We can make a dimpled smile out of a frown.
Dorothy: Can you even dye my eyes to match my gown?
Manicurist in Emerald City: Uh-huh.
Dorothy: Jolly old town!
Ozmites: [singing] We get up at 12 and start to work at 1! Take an hour for lunch and then, at 2, we're done! Jolly good fun!
The Cowardly Lion: Come on, get up and fight, you shivering junkyard!
[goes over to the Scarecrow]
The Cowardly Lion: And put your hands up, you lopsided bag of hay!
The Scarecrow: Now that's getting personal, Lion.
The Tin Man: Yes. Get up and teach him a lesson.
The Scarecrow: Well, what's wrong with you teaching him?
The Tin Man: Well, I hardly know him.
The Wicked Witch of the West: Helping the little lady along are you, my fine gentlemen? Well stay away from her, or I'll stuff a mattress with you! And you, I'll make you into a beehive. Here Scarecrow, want to play ball?
The Wizard of Oz: You are talking to a man who has laughed in the face of death, sneered at doom and chuckled at catastrophe. I was petrified.
The Scarecrow: I've got a way to get us in there, and you're gonna lead us.
The Wizard of Oz: To confer, converse, and otherwise hob-nob with my brother wizards.
The Wicked Witch of the West: And now, my beauties, something with poison in it, I think. With poison in it, but attractive to the eye, and soothing to the smell.
The Wicked Witch of the West: Poppies... Poppies. Poppies will put them to sleep. Sleeeeep. Now they'll sleeeeep!
Dorothy: I'm frightened, Auntie Em! I'm frightened!
[Auntie Em's image appears in the crystal ball]
Auntie Em: Dorothy? Dorothy? Where are you? It's me, Auntie Em! We're trying to find you! Where are you?
Dorothy: I'm here in Oz, Auntie Em! I'm locked in the witch's castle, and I'm trying to get home to you, Auntie Em!
[Auntie Em's image fades out]
Dorothy: Oh, Auntie Em, don't go away! I'm frightened! Come back! Come back!
[the Wicked Witch's image appears in the crystal ball]
The Wicked Witch of the West: Auntie Em! Auntie Em! Come back! I'll give you Auntie Em, my pretty!
[cackling, to the audience, cackling again and the Wicked Witch's image fades out]
The Wizard of Oz: [booming voice] And you, Scarecrow, have the affrontery to ask for a brain, you billowing bale of bovine fodder!
The Scarecrow: Y-Yes... Yes, Your Honor... I mean, Your Excellency... I-I mean, Your Wizardry.
The Wizard of Oz: [booming voice] Enough!
The Cowardly Lion: [to Toto who is barking at him] I'll get you anyway Pee Wee!
Dorothy: Oh will you help me? Can you help me?
Glinda: You don't need to be helped any longer. You've always had the power to go back to Kansas.
Dorothy: I have?
The Scarecrow: Then why didn't you tell her before?
Glinda: Because she wouldn't have believed me. She had to learn it for herself.
The Tin Man: What have you learned, Dorothy?
Dorothy: Well, I, I think that it, that it wasn't enough just to want to see Uncle Henry and Auntie Em. And it's that if I ever go looking for my heart's desire again, I won't look any further than my own backyard. Because if it isn't there, I never really lost it to begin with. Is that right?
Glinda: That's all it is.
The Wizard of Oz: Can I believe my eyes? Why have you come back?
Dorothy: Please, sir, we've done what you told us: we've brought you the broomstick of the Wicked Witch of the West. We melted her.
The Wizard of Oz: Ah, you liquidated her, eh? Very resourceful.
Dorothy: Yes, sir. So we'd like you to keep your promise to us, if you please, sir.
The Wizard of Oz: Not so fast, not so fast! I'll have to give the matter a little thought. Go away and come back tomorrow.
Dorothy: Tomorrow? Oh, but I want to go home now!
The Tin Man: You've had plenty of time already!
The Cowardly Lion: Yeahhh...
The Wizard of Oz: Do not arouse the wrath of the Great and Powerful Oz! I said, come back tomorrow!
[Toto runs off to hide under a curtain]
Dorothy: If you were really great and powerful, you'd keep your promises!
The Wizard of Oz: Do you presume to criticize the Great Oz? You ungrateful creatures! Think yourselves lucky that I'm giving you audience tomorrow instead of 20 years from now!
[Toto pulls the curtain aside, revealing the real Wizard of Oz as a short, middle-aged man with blond hair]
The Wizard of Oz: Oh... The Great Oz has spoken! Oh!
[the Wizard hides behind the curtain, even though Dorothy and her friends have seen the real Wizard]
The Wizard of Oz: [stammers nervously] Pay no attention to that man behind the curtain! The great and - Oz has spoken!
Dorothy: Who are you?
The Wizard of Oz: I am the great and powerful... Wizard of Oz.
[his voice lowers at the end of his sentence]
Dorothy: You are? I don't believe you.
The Wizard of Oz: [timidly] I'm afraid it's true; there's no other Wizard, except me.
The Scarecrow: You humbug!
The Cowardly Lion: Yeahhh!
The Wizard of Oz: [ashamedly] Yes, that's exactly so. I'm a humbug.
Dorothy: You're a very bad man!
The Wizard of Oz: Oh, no, my dear, I'm a very good man; I'm just a very bad wizard.
Title Card: [opening title card of dedication] For nearly forty years this story has given faithful service to the Young in Heart; and Time has been powerless to put its kindly phiosophy out of fashion. To those of you who have been faithful to it in return... and to the Young in Heart... we dedicate this picture.
The Cowardly Lion: [noticing the snow that fallen on the poppy field] Unusual weather we're having, ain't it?
The Scarecrow: Come along, Dorothy. You don't want any of those apples.
Angry Apple Tree: Are you hinting my apples aren't what they ought to be?
The Scarecrow: Oh, no. It's just that she doesn't like little green worms!
Dorothy: Do you suppose we'll meet any wild animals?
The Tin Man: Mm, we might.
The Scarecrow: Animals that eat... s-traw?
The Tin Man: Some, but mostly lions, and tigers, and bears.
The Scarecrow: And tigers?
The Tin Man: And bears.
The Gatekeeper: Who rang that bell?
The Gatekeeper: Can't you read?
The Scarecrow: Read what?
The Gatekeeper: The notice!
The Gatekeeper: It's on the door - as plain as the nose on my face! It... oh...
[does a tsking, expression, goes inside door for a moment. He hangs the notice and goes back inside]
[Dorothy knocks the door and he opens the window]
The Gatekeeper: Well, that's more like it! Now, state your business!
The Gatekeeper: [gasps] The Wizard? But, nobody can see the Great Oz! Nobody's ever seen the Great Oz! Even, I've never seen him!
Dorothy: Well, then how do you know there is one?
The Gatekeeper: Because, he... I... Oh, you're wasting my time.
[starts to close the window]
Dorothy: Oh, please. Please, sir. I've got to see the Wizard. The Good Witch of the North sent me.
The Gatekeeper: Prove it.
The Scarecrow: She's wearing the ruby slippers, she gave her.
The Gatekeeper: Oh, so she is! Well, bust my buttons! Why didn't you say that in the first place? That's a horse of a different color! Come on in!
The Scarecrow: What about the heart that you promised Tin Man? Or the courage you promised Lion?
The Wizard of Oz: Do not arouse the wrath of the great and powerful Oz. I said come back tomorrow.
The Wizard of Oz: [speaking in a booming voice into microphone] I am the great and powerful...
[then, realizing that it is useless to continue his masquerade, moves away from microphone, speaks in a normal voice]
The Wizard of Oz: ... Wizard of Oz.
'Zeke': Listen, kid. Are you gonna try and let that old Gulch heifer try and buffalo ya'? She ain't nothing to be afraid of. Have a little courage, that's all.
Dorothy: I'm not afraid of her.
'Zeke': Well then, next time she squawks, walk right up to her and spit in her eye. That's what I'd do.
The Wicked Witch of the West: Ring around the rosie, a pocket full of spears! Thought you were pretty foxy, didn't you? Well! The last to go will see the first three go before her! And your mangy little dog, too!
[the Cowardly Lion has just received a Courage Medal from the Wizard of Oz]
The Cowardly Lion: Shucks, folks, I'm speechless. Ha Ha!
The Tin Man: Here, here. Go away and let us alone.
The Cowardly Lion: Oh, scared, huh? Afraid, huh? Ah, how long can you stay fresh in that can? Ha ha ha ha.
The Wizard of Oz: Do you presume to criticize the Great Oz? You ungrateful creatures. Think yourselves lucky that I'm giving you an audience tomorrow, instead of 20 years from now.
The Cowardly Lion: [singing] I'm afraid there's no denyin' / I'm just a dandy-lion / A fate I don't deserve / I'm sure I could show my prowess / Be a lion, not a mouse / If I only had the nerve.
'Hunk': Now look here, Dorothy, you ain't using your head about Miss Gulch. You'd think you didn't have any brains at all.
Dorothy: I have so got brains.
'Hunk': Well, why don't you use them? When you come home, don't go by Miss Gulch's place. Then Toto won't get in her garden, and you won't get in no trouble. See?
Dorothy: Oh Hunk, you just won't listen, that's all.
'Hunk': Well, your head ain't made of straw, you know.
The Cowardly Lion: [getting a panic attack walking into the Wizard's foyer] Wait a minute, Fellows. I was just thinking. I really don't want to see the Wizard this much. I'd better wait for you outside.
The Scarecrow: What's the matter?
The Tin Man: Oh, he's just a scared again.
Dorothy: Don't you know the Wizard's going to give you some courage?
The Cowardly Lion: I'd be too scared to ask him for it.
Dorothy: Well then, we'll ask him for you.
The Cowardly Lion: I'd sooner wait outside.
Dorothy: Why? Why?
The Cowardly Lion: Because I'm still scared.
Dorothy: You ought to be ashamed of yourself, frightening him like that when he came for you to help!
The Wizard of Oz: [booming voice] Silence, whippersnapper! The beneficent Oz has every intention of granting your requests!
The Cowardly Lion: What's that? What'd he say?
Dorothy: Oh, come on.
[pulls the Lion up]
The Cowardly Lion: Huh, what'd he say?
The Wizard of Oz: [booming voice] But first, you must prove yourselves worthy by performing a very small task. Bring me the broomstick of the Witch of the West.
The Tin Man: But if we do that, We'll have to kill her to get it.
The Wizard of Oz: [booming voice] Bring me her broomstick, and I'll grant your requests. Now, go!
The Cowardly Lion: But... but, what if she kills us first?
The Wizard of Oz: [booming voice] I said GO!
[the Cowardly Lion jumps with fright and running of the Wizard's throne room, jumps out of the window]