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Mr. Deeds Goes to Town (1936) Poster

Quotes

Longfellow Deeds: People here are funny. They work so hard at living they forget how to live.

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Longfellow Deeds: About my playing the tuba. Seems like a lot of fuss has been made about that. If, if a man's crazy just because he plays the tuba, then somebody'd better look into it, because there are a lot of tuba players running around loose. 'Course, I don't see any harm in it. I play mine whenever I want to concentrate. That may sound funny to some people, but everybody does something silly when they're thinking. For instance, the judge here is, is an O-filler.

Judge May: A what?

Longfellow Deeds: An O-filler. You fill in all the spaces in the O's with your pencil. I was watching him.

[general laughter]

Longfellow Deeds: That may make you look a little crazy, Your Honor, just, just sitting around filling in O's, but I don't see anything wrong, 'cause that helps you think. Other people are doodlers.

Judge May: "Doodlers"?

Longfellow Deeds: Uh, that's a word we made up back home for people who make foolish designs on paper when they're thinking: it's called doodling. Almost everybody's a doodler; did you ever see a scratchpad in a telephone booth? People draw the most idiotic pictures when they're thinking. Uh, Dr. von Hallor here could probably think up a long name for it, because he doodles all the time.

[general laughter; he takes a sheet off the doctor's notepad]

Longfellow Deeds: Thank you. This is a piece of paper he was scribbling on. I can't figure it out - one minute it looks like a chimpanzee, and the next minute it looks like a picture of Mr. Cedar. You look at it, Judge. Exhibit A for the defense. Looks kind of stupid, doesn't it, Your Honor? But I guess that's all right; if Dr. von Hallor has to, uh, doodle to help him think, that's his business. Everybody does something different: some people are, are ear-pullers; some are nail-biters; that, uh, Mr. Semple over there is a nose-twitcher.

[general laughter]

Longfellow Deeds: And the lady next to him is a knuckle-cracker.

[general laughter]

Longfellow Deeds: So you see, everybody does silly things to help them think. Well, I play the tuba.

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Longfellow Deeds: Now, um, heh, now about the Faulkner sisters. That's kind of funny. I mean, about Mr. Cedar going all the way to Mandrake Falls to bring them here. Do you mind if I talk to them?

Judge May: Not at all.

Longfellow Deeds: Jane, who owns the house you live in?

[pause; then Jane whispers to Amy; Amy whispers back]

Jane Faulkner: Why, you own it, Longfellow.

Amy Faulkner: Yes, you own it.

Longfellow Deeds: Do you pay any rent?

Jane Faulkner: No, we don't pay any rent.

Amy Faulkner: Good heavens, no, we never pay rent.

Longfellow Deeds: Are you happy there?

Jane Faulkner: Oh, yes.

Amy Faulkner: Yes indeed.

Longfellow Deeds: Now, uh, Jane, a little while ago you said I was pixilated. Do you still think so?

[Jane whispers to Amy; Amy whispers back]

Jane Faulkner: Why, you've always been pixilated, Longfellow.

Amy Faulkner: Always.

Longfellow Deeds: That's fine, hm, I guess maybe I am. And now tell me something, Jane: who else in Mandrake Falls is pixilated?

Jane Faulkner: Why, everybody in Mandrake Falls is pixilated - except us.

Amy Faulkner: Mm-hmm.

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Louise "Babe" Bennett: Mabel, that guy's either the dumbest, stupidest or the most imbecilic idiot in the world or else he's the grandest thing alive. I can't make him out... I'm crucifying him.

Mabel Dawson: People have been crucified before.

Louise "Babe" Bennett: Why? Why do we have to do it?

Mabel Dawson: You started out to be a successful newspaper woman, didn't ya?

Louise "Babe" Bennett: Yeah, then what?

Mabel Dawson: Search me? Ask a gypsy.

Louise "Babe" Bennett: Here's a guy that's wholesome and fresh. To us, he looks like a freak. Do you know what he told me tonight? He said when he gets married, he wants to carry his bride over the threshold in his arms.

Mabel Dawson: The guy's balmy.

Louise "Babe" Bennett: Is he? I thought so too. I tried to laugh, but I couldn't. It stuck in my throat.

Mabel Dawson: Aw, cut it out, will ya. You'll get me thinking about Charlie again.

Louise "Babe" Bennett: He's got goodness, Mabel. Do you know what that is? No, of course you don't. We've forgotten. We're too busy being smart alecks. Too busy in a crazy competition for nothing.

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[Deeds and attorney Cedar shake hands in parting]

Longfellow Deeds: Even his hands are oily.

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Longfellow Deeds: When the servant comes in, Mr. Hallor, I'm going to ask him to show you to the door. Many people don't know where it is.

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John Cedar: Your Honor, what she is saying has no bearing on the case. I object!

Judge May: Let her speak!

Babe Bennett: I know why he won't defend himself! That has a bearing on the case, hasn't it? He's been hurt, he's been hurt by everybody he met since he came here, principally by me. He's been the victim of every conniving crook in town. The newspapers pounced on him, made him a target for their feeble humor. I was smarter than the rest of them: I got closer to him, so I could laugh louder. Why shouldn't he keep quiet - every time he said anything it was twisted around to sound imbecilic! He can thank me for it. I handed the gang a grand laugh. It's a fitting climax to my sense of humor.

John Cedar: Why, Your Honor, this is preposterous.

Babe Bennett: Certainly I wrote those articles. I was going to get a raise, a month's vacation. But I stopped writing them when I found out what he was all about, when I realized how real he was. He could never fit in with our distorted viewpoint, because he's honest, and sincere, and good. If that man's crazy, Your Honor, the rest of us belong in straitjackets!

John Cedar: Your Honor, this is absurd. The woman's obviously in love with him.

Babe Bennett: What's that got to do with it?

John Cedar: Well, you are in love with him, aren't you?

Babe Bennett: What's that got to do with it?

John Cedar: You are, aren't you?

Babe Bennett: Yes!

John Cedar: Your honor, her testimony is of no value. Why shouldn't she defend him? It's the typical American womanhood. The instinct to protect the weak.

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[Two shy sisters testify at Deeds's sanity hearing]

John Cedar: Do you know the defendant, Mr. Longfellow Deeds?

[long pause]

Jane Faulkner: Oh yes, yes, of course we know him.

John Cedar: How long have you known him?

[Jane whispers to Amy; Amy whispers back]

Jane Faulkner: Since he was born.

Amy Faulkner: Yes, Elsie Taggart was the midwife.

Jane Faulkner: He was a seven months' baby.

John Cedar: Thank you, that's, that's fine. Do you see him very often?

[Jane whispers to Amy; Amy whispers back]

Jane Faulkner: Most every day.

Amy Faulkner: Sometimes twice.

Judge May: Must we have the echo?

John Cedar: Suppose you just answer, Miss Jane. Now, will you tell the court what everybody at home thinks of Longfellow Deeds?

[pause; then Jane whispers to Amy; Amy whispers back]

Jane Faulkner: They think he's pixilated.

Amy Faulkner: Oh, yes, pixilated.

Judge May: He's what?

John Cedar: What was that you said he was?

Jane Faulkner: Pixilated.

Amy Faulkner: Mm-hmm.

John Cedar: Now that's rather a strange word to us, Miss Jane. Can you tell the court exactly what it means?

Court Doctor: Perhaps I can explain, Your Honor. The word "pixilated" is an early American expression derived from the word "pixies," meaning elves. They would say the pixies had got him. As we nowadays would say, a man is "balmy."

Judge May: Oh. Is that correct?

Jane Faulkner: Mm-hmm.

Amy Faulkner: Mm-hmm.

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Longfellow Deeds: [to the Court] It's like I'm out in a big boat, and I see one fellow in a rowboat who's tired of rowing and wants a free ride, and another fellow who's drowning. Who would you expect me to rescue? Mr. Cedar - who's just tired of rowing and wants a free ride? Or those men out there who are drowning? Any ten year old child will give you the answer to that.

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Longfellow Deeds: Hand me my pants. I wrote her phone number on a piece of paper.

Walter: You have no pants, sir. You came home last night without them.

Longfellow Deeds: I did what?

Walter: As a matter of fact, you came home without any clothes at all. You were in your shorts. Yes, sir.

Longfellow Deeds: Don't be silly, Walter. I couldn't walk around on the streets without any clothes. I'd be arrested.

Walter: That's what the two policemen said, sir.

Longfellow Deeds: What two policemen?

Walter: The ones who brought you home, sir. They said you and another gentleman kept walking up and down the street shouting "back to nature! Clothes are a blight on civilization! Back to nature!"

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[to Walter, as he interrupts Mr. Deeds' tuba playing]

Longfellow Deeds: The evil finger's on you!

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[Mac, the newspaper editor, is chewing out his reporting staff for their inability to get a scoop on Deeds]

MacWade: He's been here three days and what have you numb-skulls brought in? Any halfwit novice could have done better. You imbecilic stoops. Now get out of here before I really tell you what I think of you. Go on, get out!

[a reporter mumbles an unintelligible insult at Mac as he exits the office]

MacWade: What was that?

Reporter: I said you were a... uh... I said you had dirty plaster.

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Cornelius Cobb: [Approaching a Vermont farmer who is busy unloading boxes] Good morning!

Farmer: Morning, neighbors. 'Morning.

Cornelius Cobb: A...

[farmer walks away with a box]

Cornelius Cobb: That's an excellent start. At least we've broken the ice.

John Cedar: [the farmer returns] I say, my friend, do you know a fellow by the name of Longfellow Deeds?

Farmer: Deeds?

John Cedar: Yes.

Farmer: Yes, sir. Yes, indeedy. Everyone knows Deeds.

John Cedar: Yeah, we...

[farmer walks away with a box]

Cornelius Cobb: Must be a game he's playing.

John Cedar: [the farmer returns] We'd like to get in touch with him. It's very important.

Farmer: Who's that?

John Cedar: Deeds! Who do you think I am talking about?

Farmer: Oh, yes, Deeds. Fine fellow. Very democratic. You won't have no trouble at all. Talks to anybody.

[walks away with a box]

John Cedar: I guess we'd better try somebody else.

Cornelius Cobb: No. We won't. The next time that jumping jack comes out, I'll straddle him while you ask him your questions.

Farmer: 'Morning, neighbor.

Cornelius Cobb: Remember us, the fellows who were here a minute ago?

Farmer: Oh, yeah. Yes, indeedy. I never forget a face.

Cornelius Cobb: Listen, pop. We've come all the way from New York to look up a fellow by the name of Deeds. It's important. It's *very* important.

Farmer: You don't have to get rough, neighbor. All you've got to do is ask.

Cornelius Cobb: Then *please* pretend, for just one fleeting moment, that I'm asking. Where does he reside?

Farmer: Who?

[Cobb gives up in desperation]

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Longfellow Deeds: You know the poem I told you about? It's finished. Would you like to read it? It's to you.

Babe Bennett: Yes. Of course.

Longfellow Deeds: You don't have to say anything, Mary. You can tell me tomorrow what you think.

Babe Bennett: I tramped the Earth with hopeless feet / searching in vain for a glimpse of you / Then heaven thrust you at my very feet / a lovely angel, too lovely to woo / My dream has been answered, but my life's just as bleak / I'm handcuffed and speechless in your presence divine / For my heart longs to cry out. If it only could speak / I love you, my angel. Be mine. Be mine.

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Longfellow Deeds: He talks about women as if they were cattle.

Walter: Every man to his taste, sir.

Longfellow Deeds: Tell me, Walter, are all these stories I hear about my uncle true?

Walter: Well, sir, he sometimes had as many as twenty in the house at the same time.

Longfellow Deeds: Twenty! What did he do with them?

Walter: That is something I was never able to find out, sir.

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Longfellow Deeds: Cedar, Cedar, Cedar and Budington. Funny, I can't think of a rhyme for "Budington".

Cornelius Cobb: Why should you?

Longfellow Deeds: Well, whenever I run across the funny name, I like to poke around for a rhyme.

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Longfellow Deeds: [to the Court] From what I can see, no matter what system of government we have, there will always be leaders and always be followers. It's like the road out in front of my house. It's on a steep hill. Every day I watch the cars climbing up. Some go lickety-split up that hill on high, some have to shift into second, and some sputter and shake and slip back to the bottom again. Same cars, same gasoline, yet some make it and some don't. And I say the fellas who can make the hill on high should stop once in a while and help those who can't. That's all I'm trying to do with this money. Help the fellas who can't make the hill on high.

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Louise "Babe" Bennett: [Taking Mr. Deeds to see Grant's Tomb] To most people, it's an awful let-down... To most people, it's a washout.

Longfellow Deeds: Well, that depends on what they see.

Louise "Babe" Bennett: Now what do you see?

Longfellow Deeds: Me? Oh I see a small Ohio farm boy becoming a great soldier. I see thousands of marching men. I see General Lee with a broken heart surrendering. And I can see the beginning of a new nation, like Abraham Lincoln said. And I can see that Ohio boy being inaugurated as President. Things like that can only happen in a country like America.

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Cornelius Cobb: [Reading entrance sign of Mandrake Falls town, written by Deeds] Welcome to Mandrake Falls / Where the scenery enthralls / Where no hardship e'er befalls / Welcome to Mandrake Falls.

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Longfellow Deeds: [to Cobb] There once was a man named Cobb / Kept Semple away from the mob / Came the turn of the tide / And Semple he died / And now poor Cobb is out of a job.

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John Cedar: [giving his name card to Deeds] I'm John Cedar, of the New York firm of Cedar, Cedar, Cedar and Budington.

Longfellow Deeds: [chuckling] Cedar, Cedar, Cedar, Budington. Budington must feel like an awful stranger.

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Judge May: Mr. Deeds, there has been a great deal of damaging testimony against you. Your behavior, to say the least, has been most strange. But in the opinion of the court, you are not only sane, but you're the sanest man that ever walked into this courtroom!

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[last lines]

Jane Faulkner: He's still pixilated.

Amy Faulkner: He sure is!

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Morrow: You hop aboard my magic carpet and I'll show you sights that you've never seen before.

Longfellow Deeds: Well, I'd kinda like to see Grant's tomb and the Statue of Liberty.

Morrow: Well, you'll not only see those, but before the evening's half through, you'll be leaning against the Leaning Tower of Pisa, you'll mount Mount Everest, I'll show you the Pyramids and all the little pyramidees, leaping from sphinx to sphinx!

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Morrow: Pal, look, how would you like to go on a real old-fashioned binge?

Longfellow Deeds: Binge?

Morrow: Yeah, I mean the real McCoy. Listen, you play saloon with me and I'll introduce you to every wit, nitwit, and half-wit in New York. We'll go on a twister that'll make Omar the soused philosopher of Persia look like an anemic on a goat's milk diet!

Longfellow Deeds: Well, I guess that oughtta be fun.

Morrow: Fun? Listen, I'll take you on a bender that will live in your memory as a thing of beauty and a joy forever!

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[reading Babe's first column about Deeds]

MacWade: "At two o'clock this morning, Mr. Deeds held up traffic while he fed a bagful of doughnuts to a horse. When asked why he was doing it, he replied, 'I just wanted to see how many doughnuts this horse would eat before he asked for a cup of coffee.'"

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Cornelius Cobb: You're wasting your time. He doesn't want any lawyers. He's sunk so low he doesn't want help from anybody. You can take a bow for that. As swell a guy as ever hit this town, and you crucified him for a couple of stinking headlines. You've done your bit. Now, stay out of his way.

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Anderson: [walks up to the farmer] Longfellow Deeds. Where does he live?

Farmer: Oh, that's what you want. Why didn't you say so in the first place instead of beating around the bush? Those other fellows don't know what they're talking about. Come on, I'll take you there in my car. If they'd only explained to me what they want, there'd be no trouble.

Mrs. Meredith - Housekeeper: [the group arrives at Longfellow's house and knocks] Oh. Will you come in, please, gentlemen?

John Cedar: Is Mr. Deeds in?

Mrs. Meredith - Housekeeper: No, he's over to the park arranging a bazaar to raise money for the fire engine.

[turning to farmer]

Mrs. Meredith - Housekeeper: Mal, you should've knowed he was in the park.

Mrs. Meredith - Housekeeper: Knowed it all the time but these men said they wanted to see the house. Can't read their minds if they don't say what they want.

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Longfellow Deeds: What puzzles me is why people seem to get so much pleasure out of hurting each other. Why don't they try liking each other once in a while?

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Longfellow Deeds: Last night, after I left you, I was walking along and looking at the tall buildings. And I got to thinkin' about what Thoreau said: "They created a lot of grand palaces here, but they forgot to create the noblemen to put in them."

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Babe Bennett: He's got goodness, Mabel. Do you know what that is? No, of course you don't. We've forgotten. We're too busy being smart alecks. Too busy in a crazy competition for nothing.

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Longfellow Deeds: Just because I want to give this money to people who need it, they think I'm crazy.

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Cornelius Cobb: He writes poetry?

Mrs. Meredith - Housekeeper: Oh, my goodness, yes. Longfellow's famous! He writes all those things on post cards. You know, for Christmas and Easter and Birthdays. Sit down, please. Here's one. He got $25 for this one! "When you've nowhere to turn, And you're feeled with doubt, Don't stand in midstream hesitating, For you know that your Mother's heart cries out, 'I'm waiting, my boy. I'm waiting.'" Isn't that beautiful? Isn't it a lovely sentiment?

Cornelius Cobb: Yeah.

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John Cedar: I have good news for you, sir. Mr. Semple left a large fortune when he died. He left it all to you, Mr. Deeds. Deducting the taxes, it amounts to something in the neighborhood of $20,000,000.

Mrs. Meredith - Housekeeper: How about lunch? Are the gentlemen going to stay or not?

Longfellow Deeds: Of course they're going to stay. She's got some fresh orange layered cake, you know, with the thick stuff on the top. Sure, they don't want to go to the hotel.

[starts playing the tuba]

John Cedar: Perhaps you didn't hear what I said, Mr. Deeds. The whole Semple fortune goes to you: $20,000,000.

Longfellow Deeds: Oh, yes, I heard you, all right. $20,000,000. That's quite a lot, isn't it.

Cornelius Cobb: It'll do in a pinch.

Longfellow Deeds: Yes, in deed. I wonder why he left me all that money. I don't need it.

[returns to playing the tuba]

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Cornelius Cobb: Look.

John Cedar: What?

Cornelius Cobb: That tuba player. Well, now I've seen everything.

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John Cedar: I wouldn't worry if I were you. Of course, a large portion like this entails a great responsibility. But, you'll have a good deal of help. So, don't worry. Leave everything to me.

Longfellow Deeds: Oh, I wasn't worried about that.

John Cedar: No?

Longfellow Deeds: I was wondering where they're gonna get another tuba player for the band.

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MacWade: A corn-fed bohunk like that falling into the Semple fortune is hot copy! It's got to be personal. It's got to have an angle. What does he think about? How does it feel to be a millionaire? Is he going to get married? What does he think of New York? Is he smart? Is he dumb? A million angles!

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Butler: The gentlemen from the opera are still waiting in the boardroom, sir. They're getting a trifle impatient, sir.

Longfellow Deeds: They are? I forgot all about them. What do you think they want?

John Cedar: Well, your uncle was chairman of the Board of Directors. They probably expect you to carry on.

Cornelius Cobb: I'll tell those mugs to keep their shirts on.

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Longfellow Deeds: Gee, I'm busy. Do the opera people always come here for their meetings?

Cornelius Cobb: Uu-hum.

Longfellow Deeds: That's funny. Why is that?

Cornelius Cobb: Why do mice go where there's cheese?

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Longfellow Deeds: We must give the wrong kind of shows.

Italian Opera Board Member: The wrong kind? Why, there isn't any wrong kind or right kind. Opera is opera.

Longfellow Deeds: I guess it is. I personally wouldn't care to be the head of a business that kept losing money! That wouldn't be common sense. Incidentally, where is the $180,000 coming from?

Italian Opera Board Member: Well, we were rather expecting it to come from you.

Longfellow Deeds: Me?

Italian Opera Board Member: Naturally.

Longfellow Deeds: Excuse me, gentlemen, there's nothing natural about that.

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Cornelius Cobb: I can't hold out any longer: lamb bites wolf. Beautiful.

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Cornelius Cobb: Well, how 'bout tonight? What would you like in the way of entertainment?

Longfellow Deeds: Entertainment?

Cornelius Cobb: Your uncle had a weakness for dark ones, tall and stately. How would you like yours? Dark or fair? Tall or short? Fat or thin? Tough or tender?

Longfellow Deeds: What are you talking about?

Cornelius Cobb: Women! Ever heard of 'em?

Longfellow Deeds: Oh!

Cornelius Cobb: Name your poison and I'll supply it.

Longfellow Deeds: Some other time, Cobb. Some other time.

Cornelius Cobb: Okay, you're the boss. When your blood begins to boil, yell out.

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Longfellow Deeds: I guess I found out that all famous people aren't big people.

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Morrow: Oh, what a magnificent deflation of smug-glers. Pal, you've added ten years to me life. A poet with a straight left and a right hook. Delicious. Delicious! You're my guest from now on - forever and a day - even unto eternity!

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MacWade: [reading from the newspaper] "'I play the tuba to help me think.' This is one of the many startling statements made by Longfellow Deeds, New York's new Cinderella Man, who went out last night to prove that his uncle, M. W. Semple, from whom he inherited 20 million dollars, was a rank amateur in the art of standing the town on its cauliflower ear." Cinderella Man! That's sensational, Babe. Sensational!

Babe Bennett: High-powered acting, believe me.

MacWade: Get it?

Babe Bennett: I was the world's sweetest ingenue.

MacWade: Is he really that big a sap?

Babe Bennett: He's the original. There're no carbon copies of that one.

MacWade: Cinderella Man - Babe, you've stuck a title on that hick that will stick to him the rest of his life!

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Walter: If you permit me to say so, sir, you were out on quite a bender last night, sir.

Longfellow Deeds: Bender? You're wrong, Walter. We out to a binge but we never got to it.

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Longfellow Deeds: They got you down as a sap!

Longfellow Deeds: I think I'll go down and punch this editor in the nose.

Cornelius Cobb: No you don't! Get this clear: socking people in the nose is no solution - for anything.

Longfellow Deeds: Sometimes it's the only solution.

Cornelius Cobb: Not editors! Take my word for it. Not editors!

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Cornelius Cobb: Listen, Longfellow. You got brains, kid. You'll get along swell, if you'll only curb your homicidal instincts and keep your trap shut. Don't talk to anybody. These news hounds are out gunning for you.

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Babe Bennett: Got any news? I mean, eh, has anything exciting been happening lately?

Longfellow Deeds: Sure. I met you.

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Newspaper Photographer #1: That dame's nuts!

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Newspaper Photographer #2: Well, feast your eyes: Grant's Tomb.

Newspaper Photographer #1: Is that it?

[to cab driver]

Newspaper Photographer #1: Hey, beetle-puss, the Tomb.

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Babe Bennett: I used to love to go fishing with my father. You know, that's funny. He was a lot like you, my father was. He talked like you too. Sometimes he'd let me hold the line while he smoked and we'd just sit there for hours. And, after awhile, for no reason, I'd go over and kiss him and sit on his lap. He never said very much. But, once I remember him saying,"No matter what happens, honey, don't complain."

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Longfellow Deeds: Did you get that stuff I was telling you about?

Butler: Stuff, sir?

Longfellow Deeds: Yeah, that goo - that stuff that taste like soap?

Butler: Oh, yes, sir. Here it is the: pâté de foie gras, sir.

Longfellow Deeds: That's fine. Have a lot of it; because, she likes it.

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Cornelius Cobb: She's the dame who slapped that moniker on you: Cinderella Man. You've been making love to a double-dose of cyanide!

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Cornelius Cobb: [on the phone] Nah, nah, we're not buying any bulls. What's that? Listen, fella, bulls what I've been selling all my life.

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Cornelius Cobb: Listen, pal, I know just how you feel. A blonde in Syracuse put me through the same paces. I came out with a sour puss; but, full of fight! Come on, you don't wanna lay down now.

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Babe Bennett: I've got to see him.

County Hospital Guard: Now, listen sister, for the fourteenth and last time, he don't want to see nobody.

Babe Bennett: Well, well will you just give him my name?

County Hospital Guard: Listen, Toots, just between us, there ain't a thing in the world the matter with that guy until I mention your name. Then, he goes haywire!

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John Cedar: In these times with the country incapacitated with economic ailments and endangered with an undercurrent of social unrest, the promulgation of such a weird, fantastic and impractical plan, as contemplated by the defendant, is capable of fomenting a disturbance from which the country may not soon recover. It is our duty to stop it! Our government is fully aware of its difficulty. It can pull itself out of this economic rut, without the insistence of Mr. Deeds or any other crackpot! His attempted action must therefore be attributed to a diseased mind, afflicted with hallucinations of grandeur and obsessed with an insane desire to become a public benefactor.

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Madame Pomponi: He threw us out bodily. But, bodily!

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Babe Bennett: He's honest and sincere and good! If that man's crazy, your honor, the rest of us belong in straight-jackets!

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John Cedar: You are in love with him, aren't you?

Babe Bennett: What's that got to do with it?

John Cedar: You are, aren't you?

Babe Bennett: Yes!

John Cedar: Your honor, her testimony is of no value. Why shouldn't she defend him? It's the typical American womanhood. The instinct to protect the weak.

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Judge May: Mr. Deeds, you haven't yet touched upon the most important point: this rather fantastic idea of yours to want to give away your entire fortune. It is, to say the least, most uncommon.

Longfellow Deeds: Oh, yes, yes, I was getting to that, your honor. Suppose you were living in a small town and getting along fine and suddenly somebody dropped $20,000,000 in your lap. Supposing you discovered that all that money was messing up your life, was bringing a lot of vultures around your neck, and making you lose faith in everybody. Now, you'd be a little worried, wouldn't you? You'd feel that you had a - a hot potato in your hand and you'd want to drop it.

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Longfellow Deeds: Now, my plan was very simple. I was going to give each family 10 acres, a horse, a cow and some seed. And if they worked the farm for three years, it's theirs. Now, if that's crazy, maybe I ought to be sent to an institution; but, I don't think it is.

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