Paris, 1900: a couple are horribly murdered by a masked man with a metal claw who rips their hearts out. The sole survivor and witness to the massacre is a young girl. Twelve years later in... See full summary »
Riccardo Serventi Longhi
Let me begin by saying that I dont believe a movie needs to be "good" to be entertaining. I myself am in love with some of the worst movies ever made, and find myself watching them over and over again. If you'd like to know what they are, drop me a line.
This movie, however, is miserable. The gore isnt gorey. The Horror isnt horrifying. The jokes arent funny (and are WAY out of place).
This movie was given a lot of hype a few years ago. Trailers of the film were all over the web, and they were interesting. It was hinted that it was too graphic and violent to be released, and "oh, please help us find this future horror masterpiece a distributer before it fades away into obscurity and is never seen." Well, maybe that would have been best.
This movie semed to steal the plot of "Night of the Demons" and mix it up with some banal Scooby Doo episode. They even offer characters ripped out of Saturday Night Live's "Goth Talk".
It opens in 1959 with the torching of a all girls Catholic school/convent by a disgruntled student. She hauls guns, gas and explosives into the chapel and destroys everyone in sight, all to the tune of Leslie Gore's "You Don't Own Me". Next, we are brought into present times with two girls, one a simple sorority pledge and her former best friend, a goth chick. The goth chick is the only interesting/sympathetic character, so of course she is the first to go. Some more 'zany teens" show up, and all head off to "The Convent". Its become the local urban legend hot spot and make-out point.
That is really all you need to know. You know where its going...you know where it's gone. Someone gets possessed, they, in turn, possess someone else, and so on, and so on, and so on. Until someone has to run and get the chick that torched the place 40-some years ago in the first place.
Its just horrible. Im so sorry for Coolio, who has a sad little cameo in the film. Im so sorry for Adrienne Barbeau who apparently doesnt have anything else to look foreward to.
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