FantomWorks: One Tough Customer (2017)
Season 4, Episode 3
Drawn Out, Fake Reality Show Episode
2 July 2019
One thing you could always count on with this series was the shop owner, Dan, always being bent out of shape and taking nothing easy. Instead, he goes off the deep end more than Oliver Wendall Douglas on Green Acres (since both are fictional characters, why not compare them?).

In this episode Dan does a few things out of character for him. One, he actually listens to a pitch from anyone not him. This time, from an employee, a guy who literally pops out of the woodwork and pitches a restoration plan for an old Model T Ford. This alone is not in Dan's wheelhouse. As an anal guy, no way this Ford hasn't already been charted and given a project name and number, and assigned a project manager. Next, we find out who the mythical PM is: Dan's young daughter. Why her, who knows?. She's more anal than her dad, if that's possible. And, maybe for laughs, takes charge of this Ford Project. Showing Dan has a mean sense of humor, turning her loose on the rather silly woodworking PM wanna-be promises to let her expose the abundant supply of testosterone she inherited from the old man. Third, Dan really gives his fictional series TV character a direct drilling in the caboose, and states for all to hear that he has somehow managed to forget a project and let one of his men take it on. This stirs confusion among his troops. They all cringe at the thought of it happening to them. To top it off, working under the bosses little girl. Sack and all.

As we watch the other car done for this episode with no interest, we focus on the Ford Project with all of our well earned knowledge of this fine series. We're confused as well because this episode is so un-Dan like. Whoever wrote this episode was either promoted or lined up before a firing squad. Or both. Or married to Dan's offspring.

What really blows this whole deal is when the rapidly losing altitude woodworker gets a call with a quote for parts. The call is not only done on speakerphone but right in front of the bosses little girl. Try woodworker guy tries to dig out of his hole ('can I have a military discount?') and fails, then gets reamed by the girl and PM and bosses daughter. All fake. The daughter acts as bad as she comes across, as a poster child for the Virginia Republican Party (no offense).

This scene alone is so fake and contrived that only a complete mindless ape couldn't figure that out. The poor woodworker, forced to bend over and take it over nearly each of his 'management decisions' drawing insults from Ms. PM never overcomes his lack of este nagales and hears a muted mush sound later when he tries in vain to clank them together.

Tail between his legs, at the end he faces the boss who spares him. As a true fictional character on this fictional TV series, big time Dan let's woodman off the hook but warns him his future as a member of the management class is in peril, as is his chance to get a crack at his daughter. Woodman, of course, understands this. But, he also knows he is headed for failure city, all because he let them use him in this episode. Soon enough, he'll be changing spark-plugs at a Jiffy Lube in Arlington, or even worse, Stafford, Virginia.
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