4/10
Stab me! Nail me! Boil me! Burn me! Chop Me! Spear me!
1 October 2012
Another worthy entry in the seemingly endless list of horrible 80's slashers, "Scared Alive" (a.k.a. "Island of Blood" and a.k.a. "Whodunit") is a wondrously inept and totally redundant low-budget flick with all the right ingredients: a senseless basic premise, unmemorable characters, a complete absence of logic, laughable dialogs, various but totally non-shocking killing methods and one remotely ingenious little gimmick (a constantly repeated rock song of which the lyrics reveal how the next victim will die a gruesome death). The movie starts with a bunch of idiots (= aspiring actors/actresses) gathering on an island, allegedly to start shooting a movie after the weekend when the rest of the technical crew arrives. None of them has a clue what the movie will be about, why they were selected or what they will do on this geographically isolated island location for the rest of the weekend, but hey, that's totally normal right? Then, and luckily quite fast and at a regular pace, they're being picked off one by one by an unseen killer. His/her curious modus operandi involves hanging a walkman somewhere near to the next victim that is repeatedly playing the same song entitled "Face to Face". The singer states with what weapon the character is going to get killed, resulting in a boy drowning in a pool filled with boiling water ("Boil me! Boil me!), a poor girl showering in battery acid ("Burn me! Burn me!), another poor chick getting her face nail-gunned to the wall ("Nail me! Nail me!) etc … Some of the murder sequences are wickedly entertaining, but overall seen is "Scared Alive" just another very dumb and forgettable slasher. The attempts to mislead the viewer and throw in red herrings fail miserably and literally none of the characters deserves a bit of sympathy. The idea behind the unforeseeable "twist-at-the-end" is rather admirable, but still very implausible and badly processed. I also think the make-up artists were all schizophrenic, as some murders are illustrated quite sick and explicitly, whereas certain others are lame and occurring off-screen. Let's just conclude it's a really bizarre and amateurish slasher movie only intended for avid genre fanatics. Oh, and the complete lack of nudity – especially with one shower sequence and one alleged sex sequence - is unforgivable!
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