1/10
Now I Know Why Birds Attack
2 April 2006
Warning: Spoilers
I'm not sure why I marked my comment with "*** This comment may contain spoilers ***". It's pretty much spoiled before you ever watch it.

Normally I wouldn't comment on a film if I'd not watched it in it's entirety. However, this one deserves that honor. Most times when I have had to stop watching a movie mid-way through it's usually an interruption by forces other than myself. Not this time, I invested 60 minutes into this one and just couldn't bear the thought of wasting another 30 minutes of my life on it. (And I've sat through some real stinkers)

I don't even know where to start. Let's see; The acting was worse than I've seen at an elementary school Christmas play- the script too, for that matter, with lines like, "Turkey's are killing people, and it's not even Thanksgiving" and "Stop. The champagne's going to get hot... Don't you mean we're going to get hot and the champagne's going to get warm?". Now I do agree with some of it being so bad it was almost laughable but for the most part, this one may just be so far down the scale that it passes by the hilarity and goes right on down to "complete waste of time".

I'll admit, I do like my share of gory scenes, and I suppose the one with the man's eyeball being removed was alright, but it sure wasn't enough to hold my attention. I'd be willing to bet that the makers of this film spent more money on the Hershey's Chocolate Syrup they used as fake blood than they made on their opening weekend; and let's just say there wasn't all that much chocolate syrup used. Well, maybe there was, like I said, I never made it to the end. Maybe the pigeons won the war and the world was flooded with it. And by the way, I was rooting for the birds.

I was happy to see in another comment here that someone else showed concern over what might have happened to some of the birds used in this movie. It was sad really. As was mentioned earlier, you could actually see a hand throwing a bird at one of the actors, and then the scene where two of the birds were shown pecking away at the dead hang glider their feet were attached to the clothing on the body in a way that I probably don't really want to know.

I was going to give it 1 star but decided since I hadn't finished it I should be fair, so I gave it 2.

(I do keep my promises, and I hope this is one you've never heard of... AL)
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