Elephant (2003)
I hereby disown Gus Van Sant and Roger Ebert
14 October 2005
Warning: Spoilers
*** Spoilers *** Wow. This movie Elephant was so bad. I encourage everyone to not see it. Personally, I have a high tolerance for boredom but some of you probably do not. If it is possible to die from tedium then this flick is the litmus test. Inert as an unconscious ELEPHANT, this thing plods along till you want to pull your hair out. MOTHER-OF-PEARL this thing is so pretentious that it is almost laughable. Ugh. I am not going to harp on any details but I would like to make a couple of personal observations. First Roger Ebert's reviews are worthless. The fact that he raved about this movie while dropping GVS's name and stating his warped views on the media verses movies is proof enough. He is just too much of an insider and an academic for most of us. Find a prolific reviewer here on IMDb that you agree with and read his/her reviews as a better guide. Second personal point, Gus Van Sant's success has gone to his head. This movie is not even a good "typical day" at a high school. Or at least not any high school that I have been to. GVS has directed several of my favs (Drugstore Cowboy, To Die For, My Own Private Idaho, Good Will Hunting) so like a moron I assume Elephant will at worst be misguided. Geez Louise was I wrong. Moral of the story: Never trust a director or a movie critic. If you liked Elephant then I strongly suggest you also see Warhol's Sleep (1963). I am afraid that Elephant is to GVS as Heaven's Gate was to Cimino. (now imagine the distant ring of the death knell)
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