Movies Reviewed on

by revterry | created - 29 Oct 2017 | updated - 6 months ago | Public

Films featured on the VideoReligion blog. Reviews by myself (revterry) and a few guests.

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1. Lady Avenger (1988)

R | 82 min | Action, Drama

Maggie's brother is brutally killed by a gang of thugs. Maggie is in prison but is allowed to leave to go to her brother's funeral. At the funeral, she takes off and goes on a quest for her... See full summary »

Director: David DeCoteau | Stars: Peggy McIntaggart, Tony Josephs, Jacolyn Leeman, Michelle Bauer

Votes: 117

"I fear the new generations will never be allowed the exotic thrill of being let loose at the video rental store as children. In the years before you could find nudity by simply typing "boobs" in to Tumblr, the lanes of plastic encased VHS covers that lined the local store were one of the few afforded exposures to the sleaze the world had to offer. Even without a risky dart into the curtains of the "adult only" area a child could find a buffet of intriguing box art. The two plus trips my family made a week were never to be missed and I frequented the dwindling remains all the way till the last blockbuster (I have encountered) shut its doors on the shelved box, filled with the same mostly family safe DVD-sleeves, it called a video rental store. One of many favorites pieces of art in the Action section as a kid featured a blond model, bandanna tied to her head, wearing a wife-beater standing against a fence. She was armed with a shotgun ,had a hand gun at her waist, and also sported some perfectly defined nipples through her rugged shirt rag. The whole image resembled a bargain basement Sarah Connor at the time and my imagination concocted a plot which pretty much boiled down to oversexualized versions of the desert scenes from T2: Judgement Day. I wouldn't actually see the film itself till much later, when I would find it buried among other Shot-On-Tape classics on a lucky treasure hunt and while its titular character is definitely not Sarah Connor level, I think the little kid version of me would approve of the twisty trash ballad that is Lady Avenger(1988)..."-revterry

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2. Hard to Die (1990)

NC-17 | 77 min | Action, Comedy, Horror

While doing the inventory for a lingerie outlet in a high rise office building, five attractive women are terrorised by a series of bizarre killings. They suspect that the strange janitor, ... See full summary »

Director: Jim Wynorski | Stars: Gail Thackray, Karen Mayo-Chandler, Deborah Dutch, Melissa Moore

Votes: 976

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3. Hollywood Chainsaw Hookers (1988)

R | 75 min | Comedy, Horror

A detective embarks on a mission to track down a woman in L.A.'s seedy nightclubs, only to come face-to-face with a blood-thirsty cult of lethally beautiful prostitutes. Is he the next victim of Hollywood's demented Chainsaw Hookers?

Director: Fred Olen Ray | Stars: Gunnar Hansen, Linnea Quigley, John Henry Richardson, Dawn Wildsmith

Votes: 2,837

Full Review:

4. Smothered (2016)

Not Rated | 96 min | Comedy, Horror

Five horror icons ditch an unprofitable autograph signing convention to earn some extra cash haunting an RV park, but find themselves being haunted instead.

Director: John Schneider | Stars: Kane Hodder, R.A. Mihailoff, Bill Moseley, Dane Rhodes

Votes: 355

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5. Some Guy Who Kills People (2011)

R | 97 min | Comedy, Crime, Drama

Ken Boyd, a lonely man fresh out of the loony bin, who sets out to kill those he deems responsible for his miserable life.

Director: Jack Perez | Stars: Kevin Corrigan, Barry Bostwick, Karen Black, Leo Fitzpatrick

Votes: 5,621

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6. Julia X (2011)

92 min | Comedy, Horror, Thriller

Meeting a man on the Internet, Julia decides to see him in person, only to get abducted and branded with the letter "x" by that guy. A game of cat and mouse follows, but the story has an unexpected twist.

Director: P.J. Pettiette | Stars: Valerie Azlynn, Kevin Sorbo, Alicia Leigh Willis, Joel David Moore

Votes: 2,423

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7. Hot Tub Party Massacre (2016)

72 min | Horror

The sisters of the Delta Omega sorority won a free weekend at a luxurious hotel & spa. They planned on having a fun and steamy weekend. However, things go from steamy to bloody when an ... See full summary »

Director: Chris Greenaway | Stars: Chrissy Cooke, Stu Ford, Sarah Foster, Erin Hyndman

Votes: 65

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9. Toxic Shark (2017 TV Movie)

TV-14 | 87 min | Action, Adventure, Comedy

A tropical singles retreat takes a terrifying turn when guests realize a poisonous shark is infesting the surrounding water. Not only will it rip apart its victims, but it also uses projectile acid to hunt - in and out of the water.

Director: Cole Sharpe | Stars: Kabby Borders, Christina Masterson, Michelle Cortés, Bryce Durfee

Votes: 788

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10. Hooker with a Rocket Launcher (2015)

3 min | Short, Crime

Misty was just an ordinary prostitute trying to make ends meet on the streets of Bakerstown. That changed when Kyle recruited her to join him in his battle against President Justin's army ... See full summary »

Director: Chris Greenaway | Stars: Chris Greenaway, Nicholas MacDonald, Darren Matyas, Manbir Singh


11. All Cheerleaders Die (2013)

Not Rated | 89 min | Comedy, Fantasy, Horror

45 Metascore

A rebel girl signs up a group of cheerleaders to help her take down the captain of their high school football team, but a supernatural turn of events thrusts the girls into a different battle.

Directors: Lucky McKee, Chris Sivertson | Stars: Sidney Allison, Charon R. Arnold, Shay Astar, Sam Bean

Votes: 8,188

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12. Hard Ticket to Hawaii (1987)

R | 96 min | Action, Crime, Thriller

In Hawaii, an undercover DEA agent and her civilian friend stumble upon a drug trafficking operation, and have to enlist the help of all their colleagues/friends to go after the vicious drug kingpin.

Director: Andy Sidaris | Stars: Ronn Moss, Dona Speir, Hope Marie Carlton, Harold Diamond

Votes: 3,603

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13. The Drop (2014)

R | 106 min | Crime, Drama, Thriller

69 Metascore

Bob Saginowski finds himself at the center of a robbery gone awry and entwined in an investigation that digs deep into the neighborhood's past where friends, families, and foes all work together to make a living - no matter the cost.

Director: Michaël R. Roskam | Stars: Tom Hardy, Noomi Rapace, James Gandolfini, Matthias Schoenaerts

Votes: 140,531 | Gross: $10.72M

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14. Hideous! (1997)

R | 82 min | Comedy, Horror

A group of rival collectors of severely deformed freakish human beings and the FBI agents that are investigating them must battle against some of their collections which aren't as dead as ... See full summary »

Director: Charles Band | Stars: Michael Citriniti, Rhonda Griffin, Mel Johnson Jr., Jacqueline Lovell

Votes: 886

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15. Return of the Living Dead III (1993)

R | 97 min | Horror

47 Metascore

Having recently witnessed the horrific results of a top secret project to bring the dead back to life, a distraught youth performs the operation on his girlfriend after she's killed in a motorcycle accident.

Director: Brian Yuzna | Stars: Kent McCord, James T. Callahan, Sarah Douglas, Melinda Clarke

Votes: 13,705 | Gross: $0.05M

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16. Pumpkinhead (1988)

R | 86 min | Fantasy, Horror

47 Metascore

After a tragic accident, a man conjures up a towering, vengeful demon called Pumpkinhead to destroy a group of unsuspecting teenagers.

Director: Stan Winston | Stars: Lance Henriksen, Jeff East, John D'Aquino, Kimberly Ross

Votes: 19,979 | Gross: $4.39M

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17. Vampire's Kiss (1988)

R | 103 min | Comedy, Horror

31 Metascore

After an encounter with a neck-biter, a publishing executive thinks that he's turning into a vampire.

Director: Robert Bierman | Stars: Nicolas Cage, Maria Conchita Alonso, Jennifer Beals, Elizabeth Ashley

Votes: 14,069 | Gross: $0.73M

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18. The Substitute (1996)

R | 114 min | Action, Crime, Drama

Mercenary Shale's team is retired after a (not so) covert mission in Cuba. He becomes substitute teacher at his teacher fiancee's Miami high school to get those behind kneecapping her. His team helps him.

Director: Robert Mandel | Stars: Tom Berenger, Raymond Cruz, William Forsythe, Luis Guzmán

Votes: 12,093 | Gross: $14.75M

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19. Deathrow Gameshow (1987)

R | 83 min | Comedy

Chuck Toedan's the host of a gameshow featuring death row convicts competeing in life-or-death contests in hopes of cheating the executioner or, at the very least, winning some nice prizes ... See full summary »

Director: Mark Pirro | Stars: John McCafferty, Robyn Blythe, Beano, Darwyn Carson

Votes: 673

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20. Hell Comes to Frogtown (1988)

R | 86 min | Action, Comedy, Sci-Fi

After a worldwide nuclear war, where 68% of the male population was wiped out and virile men becoming a rarity, Sam Hell, a scavenger and a highly virile man, is assigned to help rescue a group of fertile women kidnapped by humanoid frogs.

Directors: Donald G. Jackson, R.J. Kizer | Stars: Julius LeFlore, RCB, Roddy Piper, William Smith

Votes: 5,188

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21. Undefeatable (1993)

R | 90 min | Action, Crime, Thriller

Kristi Jones (Cynthia Rothrock) avenges her sister's death at the hands of a crazed martial arts rapist.

Director: Godfrey Ho | Stars: Cynthia Rothrock, Don Niam, John Miller, Donna Jason

Votes: 2,023

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22. Jack Frost (1997 Video)

R | 89 min | Comedy, Fantasy, Horror

After an accident that left murderer Jack Frost dead in genetic material the vengeful killer returns as a murderous snowman to exact his revenge on the man who sent him to be executed

Director: Michael Cooney | Stars: Scott MacDonald, Christopher Allport, Stephen Mendel, F. William Parker

Votes: 7,811

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23. Santa's Slay (2005)

R | 78 min | Comedy, Fantasy, Horror

Santa Claus is actually a demon who lost a bet with an Angel, so he becomes the giver of toys and happiness. But when the bet is off, he returns to his evil ways.

Director: David Steiman | Stars: Bill Goldberg, Douglas Smith, Emilie de Ravin, Robert Culp

Votes: 8,899

While we portray Santa as a jolly fat man who endorses carefree capitalism, felt clothing and a very loose code of ethics, it's no secret that his origins aren't as nice or marketable. Somewhere between the telephone game and religious censorship some of Saint Nick's darker qualities were removed for the general population. Like many things of it’s nature the process of marketing Christmas would mean a removal of teeth and sanding of edges. In older legends it wasn't only presents getting delivered by the fat guy on Christmas Eve night, the bad kids got deity style beat downs as well. In some Santa would take a more omniscience role, and to avoid getting his hands dirty, he brought his hairy grotesque homie Krampus along to do his heavy work. While Santa handed out gifts to the polite kiddos, the demon esqu Krampus ran around fucking up the other kids day. Lucky for me, where our asshole cultural forefathers liked to keep it PG and vanilla as fuck, the horror genre likes to focus on the good stuff in magnification. The topic of Santa's darkside, Krampus and other archaic Yuletide misery, unsurprisingly has come up once or twice in the genre. Most mentioned as of late the properly titled and funded Krampus (2015). Michael Dougherty’s Krampus does a pretty good job of making a comedic and dark but family centered holiday film. It wasn't the first film to attempt that task and as an entertainingly less effective example we have Santa's Slay..."-RevTerry

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24. Dudes (1987)

R | 90 min | Adventure, Comedy

3 punk loving dudes in NYC need a change and drive a VW Beetle to California. After rednecks kill one of them in Arizona, they want justice. A cute girl helps them.

Director: Penelope Spheeris | Stars: Jon Cryer, Daniel Roebuck, Flea, Lee Ving

Votes: 1,236

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25. The Last Heist (2016)

TV-MA | 84 min | Action, Horror, Thriller

28 Metascore

A bank Robbery goes terribly wrong when one of the hostages turns out to be a wanted serial killer

Director: Mike Mendez | Stars: Henry Rollins, Torrance Coombs, Victoria Pratt, Michael Aaron Milligan

Votes: 2,482

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26. Chop (2011)

Not Rated | 98 min | Comedy, Horror, Thriller

Lance Reed is forced by a psychotic stranger to confront his duplicitous past. Seeking retribution for a crime, the man forces Lance to reveal his inner most secrets by systematically removing his limbs.

Director: Trent Haaga | Stars: Will Keenan, Timothy Muskatell, Chad Ferrin, Max Haaga

Votes: 1,149

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27. Video Violence (1987 Video)

Unrated | 90 min | Horror

A husband and wife open a video store in a new town, and come to find out that the locals only rent horror films and the "occasional triple X'er", and make their own snuff videos.

Director: Gary P. Cohen | Stars: Gary Schwartz, Chick Kaplan, Robin Leeds, Paige Price

Votes: 700

"Life is full of disappointments- Alien sequels, long awaited Duke Nukem games etc..., but the one that left the biggest stain on my soul was the extinction of my dream job- the video store clerk. I know it was far from a career to begin with, and most likely a vocation that came with a room at your parents house far into adulthood. All the same, it seemed like a good fit and I'm not doing much better in the life game anyway. I just wanted to be that guy. You know the one. The one with the passionate recommendations and fun facts. The associate who can tell a parent why a movie has a PG13 rating or give you a friendly warning if the gore/nudity of the film doesn't quite live up to the cover. They watched everything because it was their job and their passion.You could feel the excitement even as you made your movie choices, loving jealousy of virgin eyes as you picked up a first time watch. If you were lucky, in the VHS days, you had a “mom and pop” shop staffed only with these dedicated disciples of cinema. Even in the less golden age of the young DVD and the Blockbuster/Hollywood two party system there always seemed to be one on the floor at all times. As timed passed I watched my opportunities for my calling dwindle and disappear under the rise of Redbox and streaming/download capabilities. It's hard to admit, but in the grand scheme, change can be a good thing, and The Twilight Zone did try it's best to warn me. I also have the movies themselves to comfort me in my perceived obsolescence, as a video clerk without a shop, with increasing ease of access as technology moves forward (new transfers on disc, streaming, etc) and if i'm really in need of a trip down the greasy aisles of the home media revolution I can load up Video Violence (1987)."-RevTerry

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28. The Brain (1988)

R | 94 min | Horror, Sci-Fi

With the help of an alien organism, a man brainwashes audiences through television; a troubled high school student is determined to stop them.

Director: Ed Hunt | Stars: Tom Bresnahan, Cynthia Preston, David Gale, George Buza

Votes: 1,774

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29. 1990: The Bronx Warriors (1982)

R | 89 min | Action, Sci-Fi, Thriller

In a post-apocalyptic New York City, a policeman infiltrates the Bronx, which has become a battleground for several murderous street gangs.

Director: Enzo G. Castellari | Stars: Mark Gregory, Fred Williamson, Vic Morrow, Christopher Connelly

Votes: 2,902

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30. Decoder (1984)

Not Rated | 87 min | Horror, Mystery, Sci-Fi

A burger shop employee discovers that by changing the background music from pleasantly calming to industrial "noise" music, he can incite riots and a revolution against the looming power of the government.

Director: Muscha | Stars: FM Einheit, William Rice, Christiane Felscherinow, Britzhold Baron De Belle

Votes: 667

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31. Slime City (1988)

Not Rated | 81 min | Horror

A student moves into a run-down building in New York City. His bizarre neighbors make a concoction in their apartment they call wine, but when he takes some of it, he turns into a deformed, murderous monster.

Director: Gregory Lamberson | Stars: Craig Sabin, Mary Huner, T.J. Merrick, Dennis Embry

Votes: 904

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32. Black Scorpion (1995)

R | 92 min | Action, Crime, Sci-Fi

A female "BATMAN" with a strong story, intriguing characters, good action pacing... and several opportunities for sex.

Director: Jonathan Winfrey | Stars: Ashley Peldon, Rick Rossovich, Michael Wiseman, Bradford Tatum

Votes: 1,039

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33. Night of the Demon (1983)

Not Rated | 92 min | Horror

Professor Nugent and his students try to track down Bigfoot, but end up uncovering something more sinister at work.

Director: James C. Wasson | Stars: Eugene Dow, Joy Allen, Don Hurst, Bob Collins

Votes: 1,654

"I would like to thank the internet for showing me that Bigfoot still has a posse out there and kicking, even if it is a little more sexually focused than I seem to remember from my days as a junior cryptozoologist. The over affectionate spin on the notion is understandable. Something about Mr.Foot is ultimately very relatable and charming. It's most likely his obvious favor of ungroomed solace. There have been several points in my life where a smelly existence alone in the forest seemed like a suitable choice or alternative, and if anyone would get that- I guess it would be Bigfoot. Whatever the reasoning, it's good to know that I'm not the only one out there still looking out for the big guy. Even if nowadays my squatching is mostly contained to yelling “Hey Bigfoot, where you at?” repeatedly every time I go hiking (intoxicated) and watching pretty much any sasquatch related film I uncover. In the world of Cinema, the illusive creature’s exploits have ranged from a grip of VHS family Adventures to obscure hardcore porn. Because it's easy to find and slightly modify a gorilla suit (or equivalent),they will probably make flicks forever or at least until Bigfoot himself appears, hires a lawyer and sues the shit out of everyone. I will be there to watch every single one, no matter how bad they are or how far outside of the target audience I am, because… well Bigfoot is the shit ,and that's the kind of stuff I do with my time. Without a doubt, in my opinion, the best would fall under the “bigfoot-horror” sub genre which boasts a few all time greats. Firstly no Bigfoot film conversation would be complete without a mention of the early faux-documentary The Legend of Boggy Creek (1972), and for something a little more manic there is the genre bending Demonwarp (1988). But for my personal favorite, if only by a hair, I would have to pick Night of the Demon..."- RevTerry

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34. Possessed by the Night (1994 Video)

R | 84 min | Action, Horror, Sci-Fi

Several subplots revolve around story of mutant embryo in jar that exercises control over the lives of those who come into contact with it.

Director: Fred Olen Ray | Stars: Shannon Tweed, Ted Prior, Sandahl Bergman, Chad McQueen

Votes: 570

"There is no one discernible origin for my love of trash cinema. The roots of my high tolerance for the cheese, schlock and taboos of the film world are probably too deep for me to actually even understand, or frankley, want to. There are some important events that come to mind though. Incidents that took place over my development that could be pointed to as partly responsible for building or creating my current tastes. Unfortunately for my scholarly cred, I must admit that the driving force behind some of these contributive moments can be boiled down to being a child in the 90s and trying to see some tits. It is what it is. I refuse to apologize for little me. It sounds bad and juvenile but it's the truth, and it sounds that way because I was a juvenile. It wasn't the same as today. Boobs didn't fly out computer screens like doves every time you opened Tumblr. Back then there was no Tumblr, no google, no high speed porn tubes, and even when the fledgling internet finally showed up, it's bandwidth made waiting for a nipple to render painful. In these primitive times a curious party had to scrounge, conspire and fight for a glimpse of the coveted skin, but this brought with it a positive side effect. Since I couldn't just type boobs in a box somewhere, as a kid I would watch pretty much anything that even had the slightest hint of erotic subplot, and since it was either cable or a vhs tape, I had to just watch the whole thing. Over time, what was originally a misguided search for boobs turned into a (probably equally misguided) search for bad movies.The titties just being one part of a awesomely terrible package of entertainment. Thank the Cinema Gods for the premium channels free trials. Back then HBO and Showtime would turn on there channels for a few free days. I would spend all night watching whatever erotic thriller or near porn filled the later time slots. Usually it was the same few flicks repeated at random, so after awhile you knew which ones were worth a wait. Somewhere between my transition from little kid looking for some some cleavage to manchild just trying to watch some garbage, I ran into Possessed by the Night (1994)."-RevTerry

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35. X-Ray (1981)

R | 89 min | Horror, Thriller

While receiving a routine check-up, a woman finds herself stranded on the hospital's eighth floor, while someone dressed as a doctor is intent on her never leaving, even if it means killing any staff member who comes into contact with her.

Director: Boaz Davidson | Stars: Barbi Benton, Charles Lucia, Jon Van Ness, John Warner Williams

Votes: 2,049

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36. Hectic Knife (2016)

82 min | Action, Comedy, Horror

A put upon, knife wielding vigilante, Hectic Knife protects the city from scum, baddies and a new super villain bent on world domination, Piggly Doctor.

Director: Greg DeLiso | Stars: Michelle Polec, Jesse Wozniak, Peter Litvin, James A. Sands

Votes: 105

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37. The Occultist (1988)

Not Rated | 82 min | Action, Sci-Fi

A cyborg private eye is hired to protect a Caribbean president visiting New York City from sadistic sorcerers. Where behind the lush beauty of the island lurk powers of darkness so evil no man has ever fought them - and lived.

Director: Tim Kincaid | Stars: Rick Gianasi, Joe Derrig, Richard Mooney, Jennifer Kanter

Votes: 166

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38. Prom Night IV: Deliver Us from Evil (1991)

R | 92 min | Horror, Thriller

Four students ditch their high school prom for a party at a summer home, unaware that a psychotic priest is on the loose, determined to punish sinners.

Director: Clay Borris | Stars: Nicole de Boer, J.H. Wyman, Joy Tanner, Alle Ghadban

Votes: 1,502

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39. Exit to Hell (2013)

R | 81 min | Action, Horror, Thriller

A local gang rob a mafia run strip club, shooting up the place and killing anyone in sight. They head south for the border, but when they enter the town of Redstone and begin terrorizing ... See full summary »

Director: Robert Conway | Stars: Kane Hodder, Tiffany Shepis, Dan Higgins, Jason Spisak

Votes: 359

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40. Exorcist II: The Heretic (1977)

R | 117 min | Horror

39 Metascore

A teenage girl once possessed by a demon finds that it still lurks within her. Meanwhile, a priest investigates the death of the girl's exorcist.

Directors: John Boorman, Rospo Pallenberg | Stars: Richard Burton, Linda Blair, Louise Fletcher, Max von Sydow

Votes: 21,574 | Gross: $30.75M

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41. The Amazing Transplant (1970)

R | 77 min | Fantasy, Mystery

A seemingly pleasant fellow, Arthur goes berserk and rapes any woman in front of him wearing gold earrings. One woman tells the investigating detective (who is Arthur's uncle) she was raped... See full summary »

Director: Doris Wishman | Stars: João Fernandes, Linda Southern, Larry Hunter, Olive Denneccio

Votes: 277

"...In 1958 a newly widowed, 46-year-old Wishman decided making films would be the best way to take her mind off of the recent loss. Inspired by a loophole in New York law that allowed for nudity in cinema and her time spent working for her cousin Max Rosenberg’s film company (in “distribution”), she borrowed some cash (by her account $10,000) from her sister and went about making a “nudist” film. Without any training, and taking up most of the production roles herself, she made eight of these films between 1958 and 1964. As interest in the genre shifted, she too evolved, shifting to various more popular exploitation style films along the way, making a slasher, some porn and even trying comedy. She continued to make films aperiodically until her death in 2002. She gave the world around thirty trashy, sleazy flicks during her time in the business, and her presence can still be felt in low budget filmmaking, as well as some in some more well-known works. If there is some kind of age limit on career choices, it didn't fucking stop her. In fact, she seemed to break every rule she was privy to. She barged her way into a male-focused area of a drastically male-dominated field (not only filmmaking but “male interested” filmmaking in the 50s), doing most of the work on each film herself to avoid the industries patent bullshit. By all accounts, she was the eccentric opposition to the era’s current business climate. There are none of the common schlock filmmaker horror stories of angered/shorted associates or her being overly demanding of her skeleton crew. Any production work she was forced to outsource, was paid for, in full, at the end of the day. She apparently was always courteous to those she worked with, if not a little wearing due to her eccentric personality. The films she made exist in a peculiar place between cashing in on trends and having way to much fun making a movie to care what it looked like, never really falling too far to either side. She was truly unbound by any taboo regarding what she should have been doing or when she should be have been doing it. She is a testament to just not giving a fuck about what other people think, and just going for it. With around thirty grimy, sleazy or trashtastic flicks to her name(s), she has secured a place among the greats and has left behind immeasurable influence. To better illustrate, I want to talk about one of her films that has grown to become my favorite recently, The Amazing Transplant (1970)..."- RevTerry

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42. Ninja Dragon (1986)

85 min | Action, Crime

Major figures in the ninja community are being slaughtered. 3 ninjas are trying to figure out what evil people want to bring an end to all ninjas, and also rescue the kidnapped daughter of one of their mentors.

Director: Godfrey Ho | Stars: Richard Harrison, Paulo Tocha, Melvin Pitcher, Freya Patrick

Votes: 230

"Ninjas are a sure fire way to get me to watch a movie. They are on a long list of subjects that guarantee I will, if given the chance, indulge in a film. I have hurdled through various genres or degrees of quality solely due to the promise of a ninja appearing on screen at some point. The movie doesn't even have to be good, which is great, because there are tons of bad flicks involving the mythic assassins. Ninjas go well with everything, but they meld especially well in trash flicks. In a way the ninja, as we know and love it, belongs to cheesy entertainment. Not that there wasn't historically a people labeled as such, but the stylized image most of us pull to mind when we hear the word has been mostly formed of uninformed (but fun) fiction. The dark clad magical death fairy we have come to recognize as a “ninja” is, in bulk, the product of sensationalist oral storytelling, literary action tales and repeating trends in b-movies. It's as if two separate things share the name with only a minor relationship. On the one hand, you have the very real group of sneaky mercenaries that purposely remained mostly unknown, and on the other, one of entertainment’s many beautiful bastard children in some cool/comfortable fight clothing. In films, they can range from a magical order of karate wizards to cronie cannon fodder for the hero to mop up in faceless droves. The fill-in-the-blanks nature allows them to be shoved into most situations with little struggle, be it as major characters or hired help. In a lot of cases, it just makes a bad movie better, like throwing in something like nudity or a chainsaw. I fucking love ninjas, real ones and fake ones, whatever ninjas you got really. I hope to one day marry a ninja. You know who else really fucking loves ninjas? Godfrey Ho... or at least I assume he does since he was so instrumental in my gratuitous affection for the fake kind of ninjas. A huge chunk of his life's work incorporates one, or a bunch, as well as a title that contains the word. This, of course, includes his unexplainably absorbing mess of kung-fu and incredibly bad dubbing- Ninja Dragon (1986)..."- RevTerry

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43. Spidarlings (2016)

Not Rated | 120 min | Comedy, Horror, Musical

Poverty stricken lovers Eden and Matilda have enough trouble just getting through the days, but when Eden buys a pet spider the real troubles start.

Director: Selene Kapsaski | Stars: Sophia Disgrace, Rahel Kapsaski, Lee Mark Jones, Rusty Goffe

Votes: 172 | Gross: $0.00M

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44. Murder Weapon (1989)

90 min | Horror, Thriller

Two daughters of mobsters get out of the sanitarium after having killed a boyfriend in the shower, supposedly cured and on the right track. They hold a party and invite all their old ... See full summary »

Director: David DeCoteau | Stars: Lyle Waggoner, Linnea Quigley, Karen Russell, Stephen Steward

Votes: 373

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45. Slave of the Cannibal God (1978)

99 min | Adventure, Horror