Worst films I've ever seen

by nanasuyl | created - 04 Apr 2011 | updated - 03 Jun 2011 | Public
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1. Wanted (2008)

R | 110 min | Action, Crime, Fantasy

64 Metascore

A frustrated office worker learns that he is the son of a professional assassin and that he shares his father's superhuman killing abilities.

Director: Timur Bekmambetov | Stars: Angelina Jolie, James McAvoy, Morgan Freeman, Terence Stamp

Votes: 328,159 | Gross: $134.51M

So much gratuitous violence. The story is simply silly. I can't believe Jolie, Freeman and McAvoy are in this.

2. After the Sunset (2004)

PG-13 | 97 min | Action, Comedy, Crime

38 Metascore

The story of what happens after a master thief achieves his last big score, when the F.B.I. Agent who promised he'd capture him, is about to do just that.

Director: Brett Ratner | Stars: Pierce Brosnan, Salma Hayek, Woody Harrelson, Don Cheadle

Votes: 41,064 | Gross: $28.33M

3. White Chicks (2004)

PG-13 | 109 min | Comedy, Crime

41 Metascore

Two disgraced FBI agents go way undercover in an effort to protect hotel heiresses the Wilson Sisters from a kidnapping plot.

Director: Keenen Ivory Wayans | Stars: Marlon Wayans, Shawn Wayans, Busy Philipps, Maitland Ward

Votes: 112,251 | Gross: $70.83M

4. Hancock (2008)

PG-13 | 92 min | Action, Crime, Drama

49 Metascore

Hancock is a superhero whose ill considered behavior regularly causes damage in the millions. He changes when the person he saves helps him improve his public image.

Director: Peter Berg | Stars: Will Smith, Charlize Theron, Jason Bateman, Jae Head

Votes: 391,038 | Gross: $227.95M

After I watched this, I imagined the studio boss laughing at me and saying "hahaha, you paid for this crap!".

5. Men in Black II (2002)

PG-13 | 88 min | Action, Adventure, Comedy

49 Metascore

Agent J needs help so he is sent to find Agent K and restore his memory.

Director: Barry Sonnenfeld | Stars: Tommy Lee Jones, Will Smith, Rip Torn, Lara Flynn Boyle

Votes: 294,375 | Gross: $190.42M

6. Cats & Dogs (2001)

PG | 87 min | Action, Comedy, Family

47 Metascore

A look at the top-secret, high-tech espionage war going on between cats and dogs, of which their human owners are blissfully unaware.

Director: Lawrence Guterman | Stars: Alec Baldwin, Tobey Maguire, Jeff Goldblum, Elizabeth Perkins

Votes: 50,866 | Gross: $93.39M

Talking animals are so annoying, unless they're cartoons. I watched this as a child and already thought it was too stupid. And why are cats the villains? I'm not a cat person and used to have a dog (a lovely boxer), but I have never seen a cat which was more irritating than a poodle or pincher (or any small dog).

7. Once Upon a Time in Mexico (2003)

R | 102 min | Action, Thriller

56 Metascore

Hitman "El Mariachi" becomes involved in international espionage involving a psychotic CIA agent and a corrupt Mexican general.

Director: Robert Rodriguez | Stars: Antonio Banderas, Salma Hayek, Johnny Depp, Willem Dafoe

Votes: 140,589 | Gross: $56.36M

Again, way too much violence. Simply gross.

8. Alien³ (1992)

R | 114 min | Action, Horror, Sci-Fi

59 Metascore

After her last encounter, Ellen Ripley crash-lands on Fiorina 161, a maximum security prison. When a series of strange and deadly events occur shortly after her arrival, Ripley realizes that she brought along an unwelcome visitor.

Director: David Fincher | Stars: Sigourney Weaver, Charles S. Dutton, Charles Dance, Paul McGann

Votes: 241,899 | Gross: $55.47M

Ridiculous story. Loads of clichés. Began the fall of the Alien franchise. It should have been just the first two films. The Alien is too nice a monster to star in this crap.

9. Star Wars: Episode I - The Phantom Menace (1999)

PG | 136 min | Action, Adventure, Fantasy

51 Metascore

Two Jedi Knights escape a hostile blockade to find allies and come across a young boy who may bring balance to the Force, but the long dormant Sith resurface to claim their old glory.

Director: George Lucas | Stars: Ewan McGregor, Liam Neeson, Natalie Portman, Jake Lloyd

Votes: 620,226 | Gross: $474.54M

I was watching this and decided to look at my watch to see how much time had passed. I thought one hour had passed, but only 15 minutes had passed. This is how boring this crap is.

I wanted to hide my face in shame at the obvious cliché that the child would win the race. I doubt anybody in the audience would think the child would lose.

10. Win a Date with Tad Hamilton! (2004)

PG-13 | 95 min | Comedy, Romance

52 Metascore

A small-town girl wins a date with a male celebrity through a contest. When the date goes better than expected, a love triangle forms between the girl, the male celebrity, and the girl's best friend.

Director: Robert Luketic | Stars: Kate Bosworth, Josh Duhamel, Topher Grace, Nathan Lane

Votes: 24,545 | Gross: $17.07M

11. Me, Myself & Irene (2000)

R | 116 min | Comedy

49 Metascore

A nice-guy cop with dissociative identity disorder must protect a woman on the run from a corrupt ex-boyfriend and his associates.

Directors: Bobby Farrelly, Peter Farrelly | Stars: Jim Carrey, Renée Zellweger, Anthony Anderson, Mongo Brownlee

Votes: 202,350 | Gross: $90.57M

12. Just Like Heaven (2005)

PG-13 | 95 min | Comedy, Fantasy, Romance

47 Metascore

A lonely landscape architect falls for the spirit of the beautiful woman who used to live in his new apartment.

Director: Mark Waters | Stars: Reese Witherspoon, Mark Ruffalo, Donal Logue, Dina Spybey-Waters

Votes: 89,871 | Gross: $48.32M

Could this film be any more sugarcoated? The lady is I-dont-know-where and puts her hand against his? Oh, gosh, I'm afraid my suspension of disbelief isn't that advanced.

13. The Proposal (I) (2009)

PG-13 | 108 min | Comedy, Drama, Romance

48 Metascore

A pushy boss forces her young assistant to marry her in order to keep her visa status in the U.S. and avoid deportation to Canada.

Director: Anne Fletcher | Stars: Sandra Bullock, Ryan Reynolds, Mary Steenburgen, Craig T. Nelson

Votes: 257,475 | Gross: $163.96M

Is this film supposed to be funny? I didn't laugh once.

14. There's Something About Mary (1998)

R | 119 min | Comedy, Romance

69 Metascore

A man gets a chance to meet up with his dream girl from high school, even though his date with her back then was a complete disaster.

Directors: Bobby Farrelly, Peter Farrelly | Stars: Cameron Diaz, Matt Dillon, Ben Stiller, Lee Evans

Votes: 266,205 | Gross: $176.48M

Not funny and way too many disgusting jokes about body fluids. I guess I'd laugh if I were a guy.

15. Be Cool (2005)

PG-13 | 118 min | Comedy, Crime, Music

37 Metascore

Disenchanted with the movie industry, Chili Palmer tries the music industry, meeting and romancing a widow of a music executive on the way.

Director: F. Gary Gray | Stars: John Travolta, Uma Thurman, Dwayne Johnson, Vince Vaughn

Votes: 63,044 | Gross: $56.05M

Is this supposed to be funny? I didn't understand what they were trying to do here.

16. Starsky & Hutch (2004)

PG-13 | 101 min | Comedy, Crime

55 Metascore

Two streetwise cops bust criminals in their red and white Ford Torino, with the help of a police snitch called "Huggy Bear".

Director: Todd Phillips | Stars: Ben Stiller, Owen Wilson, Snoop Dogg, Vince Vaughn

Votes: 128,121 | Gross: $88.24M

17. Before the Devil Knows You're Dead (2007)

R | 117 min | Crime, Drama, Thriller

84 Metascore

When two brothers organize the robbery of their parent's jewelry store the job goes horribly wrong, triggering a series of events that sends them, their father and one brother's wife hurtling towards a shattering climax.

Director: Sidney Lumet | Stars: Philip Seymour Hoffman, Ethan Hawke, Albert Finney, Marisa Tomei

Votes: 87,704 | Gross: $7.08M

So much violence, crime, guns. Please, Americans, make films about other things! Otherwise the whole world will think your country is all about violence, crime, guns and drugs! :P

18. Kill Bill: Vol. 1 (2003)

R | 111 min | Action, Crime, Thriller

69 Metascore

A former assassin known as The Bride wakens from a four-year coma. The child she carried in her womb is gone. Now she must wreak vengeance on the team of assassins who betrayed her - a team she was once part of.

Director: Quentin Tarantino | Stars: Uma Thurman, David Carradine, Daryl Hannah, Michael Madsen

Votes: 851,750 | Gross: $70.10M

Yeah, I hate violence. I've learnt, I don't watch violent films anymore. But I can't understand America's obssession with violence.

I love Uma Thurman's yellow clothers in this film. That's the only reason I've watched it.

19. Kill Bill: Vol. 2 (2004)

R | 137 min | Action, Crime, Thriller

83 Metascore

The Bride continues her quest of vengeance against her former boss and lover Bill, the reclusive bouncer Budd and the treacherous, one-eyed Elle.

Director: Quentin Tarantino | Stars: Uma Thurman, David Carradine, Michael Madsen, Daryl Hannah

Votes: 579,204 | Gross: $66.21M

Had to know how this crap ended. The clothes and music are great, though.

20. Two Weeks Notice (2002)

PG-13 | 101 min | Comedy, Romance

42 Metascore

A lawyer decides that she's used too much like a nanny by her boss, so she walks out on him.

Director: Marc Lawrence | Stars: Sandra Bullock, Hugh Grant, Alicia Witt, Dana Ivey

Votes: 94,327 | Gross: $93.35M

I don't know how am I supposed to feel. Is the film funny? Is it sad? I don't get this film. Yes, I've stopped watching romantic comedies as well.