Top 20 Quotes

by mallen92506 | created - 19 Apr 2011 | updated - 01 Jul 2011 | Public

My favorite lines from any movie, game, TV show that pretty much sum up the piece or are just really funny.

 Refine See titles to watch instantly, titles you haven't rated, etc
  • Instant Watch Options
  • Genres
  • Movies or TV
  • IMDb Rating
  • In Theaters
  • On TV
  • Release Year
  • Keywords





IMDb user rating (average) to
Number of votes to »




Reset



Reset
Release year or range to »




































































































1. Carry on Cleo (1964)

Not Rated | 92 min | Comedy, History

Two Britons are captured and enslaved by invading Romans and taken to Rome. Hengist Pod creates useless inventions, while Horsa is a brave and cunning fighter. One of their first encounters... See full summary »

Director: Gerald Thomas | Stars: Kenneth Williams, Sidney James, Kenneth Connor, Charles Hawtrey

Votes: 3,369

Infamy! Infamy! They've all got it in for me!

2. Trading Places (1983)

R | 116 min | Comedy

69 Metascore

A snobbish investor and a wily street con artist find their positions reversed as part of a bet by two callous millionaires.

Director: John Landis | Stars: Eddie Murphy, Dan Aykroyd, Ralph Bellamy, Don Ameche

Votes: 116,439 | Gross: $90.40M

Is there a problem, officers?

3. Star Wars: Episode V - The Empire Strikes Back (1980)

PG | 124 min | Action, Adventure, Fantasy

82 Metascore

After the rebels are brutally overpowered by the Empire on the ice planet Hoth, Luke Skywalker begins Jedi training with Yoda, while his friends are pursued by Darth Vader.

Director: Irvin Kershner | Stars: Mark Hamill, Harrison Ford, Carrie Fisher, Billy Dee Williams

Votes: 983,581 | Gross: $290.48M

Obi Wan never told you what happened to your father.

He told me enough! He told me you killed him.

No. I am your father.

4. The Beverly Hillbillies (1993)

PG | 92 min | Comedy, Family

A feature adaptation of the classic television show, when nice guy redneck Jed Clampett strikes it rich when he finds black oil, and moves him and his kin to posh Beverly Hills.

Director: Penelope Spheeris | Stars: Diedrich Bader, Erika Eleniak, Jim Varney, Cloris Leachman

Votes: 15,639 | Gross: $44.03M

All woman know happiness (a-penis) is 'ard to find.

5. Life of Brian (1979)

R | 94 min | Comedy

75 Metascore

Born on the original Christmas in the stable next door to Jesus, Brian of Nazareth spends his life being mistaken for a messiah.

Director: Terry Jones | Stars: Graham Chapman, John Cleese, Michael Palin, Terry Gilliam

Votes: 312,804 | Gross: $20.05M

Now look. He's not the Messiah, he's a very naughty boy!

6. 'Allo 'Allo! (1982–1992)

45 min | Comedy, History, War

In France during World War II, Rene Artois runs a small café where Resistance fighters, Gestapo men, German Army officers and escaped Allied POWs interact daily, ignorant of one another's true identity or presence, exasperating Rene.

Stars: Gorden Kaye, Carmen Silvera, Vicki Michelle, Richard Marner

Votes: 20,883

Listen very carefully, I shall say this only once.

7. Carry on Camping (1969)

R | 88 min | Comedy

Sid and Bernie keep having their amorous intentions snubbed by their girlfriends Joan and Anthea. The boys suggest a camping holiday, secretly intending to take them to a nudist camp. Of ... See full summary »

Director: Gerald Thomas | Stars: Sidney James, Kenneth Williams, Charles Hawtrey, Joan Sims

Votes: 3,872

Matron, take them away!

8. Bedknobs and Broomsticks (1971)

G | 117 min | Animation, Adventure, Comedy

An apprentice witch, three kids and a cynical conman search for the missing component to a magic spell useful to the defense of Britain.

Director: Robert Stevenson | Stars: Angela Lansbury, David Tomlinson, Roddy McDowall, Sam Jaffe

Votes: 29,215 | Gross: $18.53M

What's that got to do with my knob?

9. Aliens (1986)

R | 137 min | Action, Adventure, Sci-Fi

86 Metascore

Ellen Ripley is rescued by a deep salvage team after being in hypersleep for 57 years. The moon that the Nostromo visited has been colonized, but contact is lost. This time, colonial marines have impressive firepower, but will that be enough?

Director: James Cameron | Stars: Sigourney Weaver, Michael Biehn, Carrie Henn, Paul Reiser

Votes: 566,643 | Gross: $85.16M

Get away from her, you bitch!

10. The Dark Knight (2008)

PG-13 | 152 min | Action, Crime, Drama

82 Metascore

When the menace known as the Joker emerges from his mysterious past, he wreaks havoc and chaos on the people of Gotham. The Dark Knight must accept one of the greatest psychological and physical tests of his ability to fight injustice.

Director: Christopher Nolan | Stars: Christian Bale, Heath Ledger, Aaron Eckhart, Michael Caine

Votes: 1,926,768 | Gross: $534.86M

Why So Serious

11. Moonraker (1979)

PG | 126 min | Action, Adventure, Sci-Fi

66 Metascore

James Bond investigates the mid-air theft of a space shuttle, and discovers a plot to commit global genocide.

Director: Lewis Gilbert | Stars: Roger Moore, Lois Chiles, Michael Lonsdale, Richard Kiel

Votes: 77,606 | Gross: $70.31M

Good God, what's Bond doing?

I think he's attempting re-entry, sir.

12. Austin Powers: International Man of Mystery (1997)

PG-13 | 89 min | Adventure, Comedy

51 Metascore

A 1960s hipster secret agent is brought out of cryofreeze to oppose his greatest enemy in the 1990s, where his social attitudes are glaringly out of place.

Director: Jay Roach | Stars: Mike Myers, Elizabeth Hurley, Michael York, Mimi Rogers

Votes: 198,179 | Gross: $53.88M

Let me ask you a question and be honest. Do I make you horny? Randy? Do I make you horny, baby? Yeah!

13. Top Gear (2002– )

TV-PG | 60 min | Comedy, Talk-Show

The hosts talk about everything car-related. From new cars to how they're fueled, this show has it all.

Stars: Jeremy Clarkson, Richard Hammond, James May, Ben Collins

Votes: 95,118

That's Mick Dick. Best friend, it turns out, of Billy Willy.

They work for Bob Knob, do they?

With Roger Todger.

They were gonna get it designed by the Scottish designer, Jock Cock.

14. The 40-Year-Old Virgin (2005)

R | 116 min | Comedy, Romance

73 Metascore

Goaded by his buddies, a nerdy guy who's never "done the deed" only finds the pressure mounting when he meets a single mother.

Director: Judd Apatow | Stars: Steve Carell, Catherine Keener, Paul Rudd, Romany Malco

Votes: 344,453 | Gross: $109.45M

I'm a virgin.

Great. I like that. I find that very sexy because I know that you don't have chlamydia. And that *beep* is everywhere.

15. Monty Python and the Holy Grail (1975)

PG | 91 min | Adventure, Comedy, Fantasy

93 Metascore

King Arthur and his Knights of the Round Table embark on a surreal, low-budget search for the Holy Grail, encountering many, very silly obstacles.

Directors: Terry Gilliam, Terry Jones | Stars: Graham Chapman, John Cleese, Eric Idle, Terry Gilliam

Votes: 434,582 | Gross: $1.23M

Look, you stupid bastard, you've got no arms left!

Yes I have.

LOOK!

It's just a flesh wound.

16. Keeping Up Appearances (1990–1995)

TV-PG | 60 min | Comedy

A snobbish housewife is determined to climb the social ladder, in spite of her family's working class connections and the constant chagrin of her long suffering husband.

Stars: Patricia Routledge, Clive Swift, Geoffrey Hughes, Judy Cornwell

Votes: 11,469

So then, this purser chap came up to the cabin and said we're on the captain's table. And I thought "Blimey!" I mean, you win a competition, you get a luxury cruise, and then they expect you to eat with the crew!

17. Batman: The Movie (1966)

PG | 105 min | Adventure, Comedy, Crime

The Dynamic Duo faces four supervillains who plan to hold the world for ransom with the help of a secret invention that instantly dehydrates people.

Director: Leslie H. Martinson | Stars: Adam West, Burt Ward, Lee Meriwether, Cesar Romero

Votes: 26,259

Some days you just can't get rid of a bomb!

18. Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade (1989)

PG-13 | 127 min | Action, Adventure, Fantasy

65 Metascore

When Dr. Henry Jones, Sr. suddenly goes missing while pursuing the Holy Grail, eminent archaeologist Dr. Henry "Indiana" Jones, Jr. must follow in his father's footsteps to stop the Nazis from getting their hands on the Holy Grail first.

Director: Steven Spielberg | Stars: Harrison Ford, Sean Connery, Alison Doody, Denholm Elliott

Votes: 594,834 | Gross: $197.17M

Indiana? Indiana? Let it go.

19. South Park (1997– )

TV-MA | 22 min | Animation, Comedy

Follows the misadventures of four irreverent grade-schoolers in the quiet, dysfunctional town of South Park, Colorado.

Stars: Trey Parker, Matt Stone, Isaac Hayes, Mona Marshall

Votes: 281,786

BUT MAAAAAAMM!!!!

20. King of the Ring (1998 TV Special)

180 min | Action, Sport

WWF Title: Steve Austin vs. Kane, Hell in a Cell: The Undertaker vs. Mankind, The sixth annual King of the Ring tournament featuring Ken Shamrock, The Rock, Jeff Jarrett & Dan Severn, WWF ... See full summary »

Director: Kevin Dunn | Stars: Steve Austin, Glenn Jacobs, Mark Calaway, Mick Foley

Votes: 302

Oh my god, they killed him! As God as my witness, he's broken in half!