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Reviews
The Package (2018)
1 joke on repeat
I appreciate that there is a space for juvenile or campy comedies. I get that there is some value in hokey slapstick comedy. But this movie isn't even that. It has the ingredients to BECOME that but never makes it. They simply tell the same joke with the same gag throughout. No character development, no real plot, even extra characters they come across get fed the same joke with no chance to change it up. BORING.
Mare of Easttown (2021)
Worthy of the 10
I seldom give 10 star reviews but this is a masterpiece. It's not a feel-good series but it's one full of characters that have so much depth in a storyline that really keeps you guessing all they way until the end. And I mean the very end. Don't stop once you think you know whodunnit.
I was significantly impressed and then when I saw the "behind the scenes" clips at the end of the series my admiration came to a whole new level when I realized none of the actors had the proper accent or dialect naturally but each pulled it off seamlessly. I was stunned.
It's a fantastic story. The people have so much depth. You don't love any of them and you don't hate them either. Astonishing work.
Fit for a Prince (2021)
I stayed for the dresses :(
Ok, Hallmark movies are delightfully campy and predictable so let's put all of that aside. And these other reviews do a great job pointing out plot holes and seamstress flaws. But I stayed until the end to see what amazing dresses would come out at the reveal. Ya'll. It's Sears 2001 prom catalog. They're beyond plain, boring and not suited to the actresses. If you're staying for the dresses go ahead and flip the channel.
Behind Her Eyes (2021)
Good story - should have been shorter
Normally longer media platforms allow for more character development and details. Unfortunately this film did not take advantage of it's multi-hour outlet and instead created a story that was interesting but really only had enough content to fill one 2 hour movie. Episodes were drawn out and then the interesting / "gotcha" moments were shoved in with very little detail or explanation and still left gaping plot holes. Unfortunate.
Time for Us to Come Home for Christmas (2020)
beyond a campy Christmas movie
I love Hallmark Christmas movies for exactly what they are - a little fluff, a little visual magic. But this movie was more. It had complexity, interest, characters you could relate to and root for. It had a storyline that was both mysterious and charming. Finally, the conclusion is one that you don't necessarily see coming but it make sense. Very well written.
A Ghost Story (2017)
Movie version of extending a 1 page report into a 5 page report by messing with the font and margins.
Ok, I really wanted to like this film. I get that artistic pieces aren't chock full of action and drama and I even spent some time reading through all of the positive reviews for this movie to try to gain some insight into what they saw in the film. I can't. To say this movie was slow was an understatement. Early on you see a simple scene unfolding and you know it's a deep movie so you wait, and wait and wait (and wait) and nothing happens then the next scene is another simple scene unfolding. Wait wait wait nothing... Like literally nothing. About 1/2 way in I started fast-forwarding. 5 minutes of a woman eating a pie. 5 minutes is a long time to watch someone eat pie. And then nothing... onto the next scene.
I feel like this was a genuinely interesting idea that would have made a mediocre 15 minute short film but was given finances to extend to a full feature and nobody went back to add in any details / character development or plot.
Cobra Kai (2018)
Writing is smart, clever and the characters have so many layers
The plots, the characters and the dialogue are both realistic and intriguing. The characters have so many amazing layers written in and every single one of the actors really embodies all of the complexity in what could have been a one dimensional sequel. You feel for these characters and really see how they get themselves into the situations they find themselves in. It has a lot of great action and so many laughs - fantastic fun for both me and my teenage boys. Well done.
It Chapter Two (2019)
Wanted to like it
Bill Hader was the only redeeming quality in this film. I loved the original IT and was excited for my teenagers to watch this one with me. The setting was great, the adult actors seemed fine but the cartoonlike campy villans were exceptionally distracting. Pennywise reminded us of Turbo from Wreck-It-Ralph in both physical form and personality. The storyline made little sense and the character arcs were shallow. Checked the time more than once to see how much longer the movie was going to continue. Sad.
Love Wedding Repeat (2020)
So much potential
This movie had so much potential. The cast was interesting and well played, the scenery was perfect and the idea was pretty solid. It was almost Clue meets Table 9. They get us 1/2 way there but then at the very next repeat of what "could" have happened it all fizzles out. The montage is too fast and not inclusive enough for us to get in the laughs that obviously were intended. The only other fully played out scenario falls flat and you just end up liking the characters less instead of finding them more endearing. 90% of the movie I would have rated a 9/10 but the other 10% flopped so terribly. Sad.
Murder, She Baked: A Peach Cobbler Mystery (2016)
Have her cake and eat it too...
While I applaud this series for trying something different with a Hallmark love interest, the way they ended this particular episode was infuriating. We have an established main character with a big-heart who consistently treats Norman poorly. This episode focuses on giving us a little more back-story on Mike and also letting Norman show a few new sides of himself, stregnthening his bond with Hannah. He straight up asks her out on Valentines day and she accepts. Then, after Mike asks her out too, she suddenly changes her plans in a surprise twist to have dinner with her mom and sister instead. This solves nothing. It is supposed to be a solution to not hurting anyone's feelings but it concretely is her cancelling her plans with Norman so she doesn't have to discourage Mike. He would be cancelled on either way. There isn't a lingering "decision" to be made, she clearly made it but is trying to be non-confrontational about it so she has a backup guy if things don't work out with Mike.....
Shameful. I hope Norman ends up with the assistant baker, she seems positive and delightful.
The murder twists were good in this episode though. Didn't actually see the ending coming. So good points for that!
In the Tall Grass (2019)
Hilarious
Ok, if you're looking for an edge of your seat thriller, this isn't it. But I'll tell you I (43) and my two sons (12 and 16) thought it was hilarious. Each week we pick one movie to stop our schedules and watch together. We love all genres, comedies, horror, thrillers, dramas. We were thinking this would be a mild thriller but it was sooo off from that that it became really runny. Yes yes I get that there are religious links and time loop implications but at the end of the day it's a campy slow weird story that if you just embrace it you'll find yourself laughing - a lot!
Ma (2019)
With a few tweaks this could have been a 9!
Octavia Spenser is a rockstar. She is subtle and really leaves you guessing. You never really see her next move coming. However, the plot was a bit flat so she didn't have much to work with. I WISH they had peppered into the story that she'd been raped by Ben as a teen but lost/killed the baby due to humiliation and now the opportunity to be a mother figure to these teens AS WELL AS a comrade peer with them would be both biologically and socially tempting. Then we as the audience wouldn't really know if she was planning to kill or "keep" which characters. There could have been fewer parties and more creepy moments that way. As it was it was cute, entertaining and kind of a flat slasher flick but still worth the time. Wish they had given her more to work with!
Hush (2016)
Creepier than I expected but some plot points weren't necessary
There were some large inconsistentcies in the storyline and some plot aspects weren't necessary but overall a good film. I wish the antagonist had kept his mask on longer - the was significantly creepier with it on than off.
The Crown (2016)
S1 & 2 were 10 stars - S3 took a turn
I thought a long time before writing this review. I struggle giving the series an overall star rating because seasons 1&2 were so amazing but season 3 is so lacking.
Everyone has commented on the actor changes and yes this does impact the characters slightly. But I feel there is a deeper disconnect in this 3rd season. It's really about the writing, storyline and perspective.
Seasons 1 & 2 gave us beautiful haunting insight into WHY each of the royal members were the way they were. We subtly saw how they struggled and the ways they found their own selves to be lacking. Insecurities, combined with explanation of how each were restricted and stiffled by their role and duties combined to create characters that even if you didn't like you UNDERSTOOD.
Claire Foy was amazing. She gave the queen a glimpse of a backbone, a desire to learn and be better, and the storylines led us to infer that while her hands were legally tied from much impact that she had interest and concern about the country.
This 3rd season was written, directed and portrayed in the opposite manner. Scenes are laid out to make the royals act snobbish - even discourteous - to their servants and guests. The queen is written to be not only ignorant due to a lack of schooling but also completely void of interest in knowing ANYTHING. She is played to be flaky, unfeeling, dense and completely ineffective. I understand that part of the story cover years where popular thinking questioned the purpose of the royal family. If this had been tackled in S1 or 2 we would have seen each character's struggle with it and felt for them. As it is in S3 it seems like they don't even feel they are relevant themselves.
We've been pampered by the writing and acting in the first 2 seasons. It was a realistic and raw love story to the time and the monarchy. This season is simply a boring flat flop bashing the institution. Weird twist.
Knock Knock (2015)
WANTED to like this
I'm a big Keanu Reeves fan and also a fan of a broad range of thriller/psychological movies. I try to give credit where good ideas lay. But this. I WANTED to like this - on some level, any level.
Keanu's character is very on the surface. They spoon feed the audience every emotion he has and then hits you on the head again with it a few extra times for good measure. The girls' characters are the opposite. You think that there is a tantalizingly back and forth dynamic trying to figure out who they really are - what they really want - but in the end they make absolutely no sense. No answers. Nothing. It's frustrating on both ends of the spectrum.
Nobody reacts the way you'd think that they would. Nobody behaves in realistic ways. It's just a disaster. They try to make it sexy but it flounders. I can't find any good points at all in it and that makes me very sad.
The uber driver played his role excellently which is why I give it 2 stars instead of 1.
The White Queen (2013)
Trying to like this but it's a mess
I enjoy all period pieces, historical or fantasy. I wanted desperately to like this series. Unfortunately it is simply a mess of historically inaccurate and dramatically confusing plots that serve no purpose other than trying to get to the moment where they can show the heroines breasts and softcore p***. By episode 2 they have marriages that don't make sense, decrees for no reason, haphazard wars that no one would enter into and a bumbling king oh wait three bumbling kings tossing some magic and bad acting. This is the first period series I am giving up on.
Schitt$ Creek (2015)
I almost never give 9s
I heard about this little gem via a few facebook friends who had recently binge-watched it on-demand. Tardy to the party I started season 1 about 2 weeks ago and am almost through season 4. I love this show.
It's not a traditional canned humor show. It's a character study that requires investment. Every character on the show has layers and depth only revealed a after you've "known" them for a while. The plots aren't exaggeraged but feel comedic, the dialogue whimsical yet realistic.
Give it a full season before you decide. I was on the fence for a long time but now really care about all of the characters like the family they are becoming.
Miracle Workers (2019)
I was really looking forward to this
The Earth may be round, but this show falls flat.
I feel deflated. I had been really looking forward to this series. I love the actors' previous works, I have a light sense of humor about religion, I enjoy all things quirky and delight in writing that has subtext on subtext.
This isn't a drama. It's not a comedy. It's not a study into character development or situations. It doesn't have big-picture spark nor does it have indie-film charm. It's really just a flat show of nothing.
None of the characters have enough depth to make you like or dislike them, the writing is stiff and repetitive. It's simply like watching a high budget middle school project video.
I'm sad. i wanted it to be something. Anything! But this poor thing has no redeeming qualities or anything to grab onto.
Dumplin' (2018)
Better than I expected
I started this movie in the middle of a busy afternoon, looking for some background noise while I did computer work. I thought it would be a typical "fat girl finally is valued" movie. I soon realized that Dumplin' was going to be different. The writing is fantastic. The conversations are realistic, the characters are likeable and relatable. No one is purely the good guy or bad guy, it's a healthy dose of the realization that no one is fully understood or appreciated in this little community until they open their hearts and see each other more clearly. Jennifer Anniston grows on you (I"m from the south so hearing her southern accent is jarring and distracting and she holds her mouth in an awkward way when she does it), all of the girls are beautiful and tapestry characters. The main actress who plays Dumplin' is superb. You can see the emotions behind her tough exterior and she has some beautiful moments. Not sure it would be one I watch repeatedly, but I highly recommend watching it at least once!
Ralph Breaks the Internet (2018)
Funny for adults and kids
I took my 13yo son, 11yo son and 4yo daughter to see this movie today. It was mainly just a way to burn a few hours to get out of the house during a week of rain, but I have to say that we ALL laughed out loud a lot. There were tidbits and references for all age groups and they were peppered in perfectly. The characters stayed true to themselves and the life lessons were fairly honest. Highly recommend.
The Christmas Chronicles (2018)
LOVED everything except the elves !
This movie was original, honest and entertaining. Usually Christmas movies are very predictable but this one had me guessing at almost every turn. CG was great, sets were intriguing, interesting and beautiful. The acting was great too. Kurt Russel is now my favorite Santa.
I wish, however, they'd left out the jail song number and rethought the look/personalities of the elves. The song wasted time and was boring and the elves were just freaky gremlin-like hyper puppies. I know they were supposed to each have their own personalities but their scenes moved so fast much of that was lost and they were just an annoying herd of hyper fur.
Beyond those two points, this could have been my favorite Christmas movie of all time. Bravo!
The Little Mermaid (2018)
Very disappointing
I wanted to like this movie so much. The lighting, sets, costumes hinted at the potential of a magical hit. It had elements that could have turned out really interesting. But the story itself was exceptionally bland. Like beyond children's movies bland. It was slow, the actors did their best with what they were given but all of the monologues were so drawn out and repetitive there wasn't much to work with. About midway through the movie I started fast forwarding through the talking scenes just to get to the next plot point in the movie. The ending I was striving to get to was worse than imagined. Don't waste your time.
Sierra Burgess Is a Loser (2018)
Unforgivable
I wanted to like this movie.
I enjoyed it for the first half - sure, it was an overdone 80s themed Sereno de Bergiac type switcheroo love story but I held out hope that the smart girl who had been left out for most of her life would come around and unite the world. But the opposite happened.
Sierra spent the movie lying, avoiding, putting her friends in precarious positions due to her insecurities and hiding being a b*tch behind her frumpy shape. Rationalizing making a fool out of other people's emotions based on the fact that you don't like yourself is psychopathic. In the end she made zero amends. Zero. She wrote a song (that she actually needed for class) and sent it to Veronica. It was a song about sunflowers being misunderstood and overlooked while roses get the spotlight (Sierra being the sunflower and Veronica being the rose). The song wasn't an apology. It was a lame "look at me" attempt to explain why she's an awful friend by demonstrating that Veronica is a vapid pretty flower while she's the interesting overlooked one. Worst. Apology. Ever.
Oh wait, it came with a text note that said " I never meant to hurt you"... That should patch it all up right? But. But she did mean to hurt her. That's exactly what she meant to do and the full intent behind posting an embarrasing photo on social media. So no fixes, no attempts to make things better and no real apology. She finally reverts to the shy fat-girl puppy dog eyes at the dance to demonstrate her wish to be friends again. Which Veronica - the nice girl - accepts with a hug.
Veronica showed herself to be a true friend, forgiving, trustful to a fault and loyal.
Jamie showed himself to be forgiving, trustful to a fault and loyal as well. And because Veronica went the extra steps to make amends for her part and Sierra's part in the whole scheme she actually fixes everything that Sierra messed up.
This movie should be called "Selfish Sierra and her cheerleader fairy godmother".
Making It (2018)
Great show layout and hosts - judging was lame
I really wanted to love this show to the point of giving it 10 stars, but the judging and editing were too distracting. The challenges were appropriate and interesting but the viewer barely got to see any of the "how to" and just a sweeping glimpse of the finished products. I actually got in the habit of pausing the tv to figure out what the end results were. The hosts were perfect - just enough campy humor to keep it light. The judges were ridiculous. Their critiques were pointless - zero constructive criticism or explanation of why they liked or disliked items and they seemed to contradict themselves from week to week. It would have been a 10 if they had a different judging team and better yet judged each project anonomously not knowing who did what. I hope they take everyone's comments to heart and do a second season.
The Ranch (2016)
Great as a single season
It took me a few episodes to get into this show but after that I was addicted! Sure, a little campy writing here and there but it's entertainment. For the most part I liked the characters, the situations made sense, especially the first season. I think they should have written it to just be a 10 episode event, or single series event. There wasn't really enough content to carry it for a second season and you started having de'ja vu over the plotline rehashing old issues from the first season. Great ingredients, they just cooked it too long.