Change Your Image
Upload An Image
Crop And Save
The After (2014)
nonsensical pilot with way too much swearing !
Without going into too much detail, I just cannot see the point in this Pilot, nothing anyone did made any sense, like the following: Why would you choose to go to a strangers house with other total strangers just because you had just been stuck in a lift for 5 minutes with them ? Why would an escaped convict come back to rescue some people including a police officer who he had met 2 minutes earlier and threatened with a gun when the city was swarming with police and other rescue personal ? Why does everyone swear so much, every sentence contained "fucking", the Irish character only knows this word, but hey nobody seems really bothered, there seems to be something else going on (a few booming noises and a lot of people hanging around in the streets, swearing) but everything appears to be normal, but just in case its not lets stick together with an escaped convict and a dodgy looking Irish gob shite ! Just to keep us interested in the end we have a weird guy painted blue with snazzy eyes and little horns appear and attempt to caress our heroine, he however gets knocked down and decides it will be quicker to get away by crawling on his back ! Does it make much sense ? Well it didn't to me !
Man of Steel (2013)
Dare I say the best Superman movie or Superhero movie of all time !
Just returned from an IMAX 3D showing of this movie and I must say it is the first time for a very long time I have left a movie theatre extremely satisfied, the movie was as near to perfection for a sci-fi/superhero/action movie you could get, the only thing that let it own very slightly was the score but only because I have always been a fan of the original movie soundtrack, thinking about it now it would not have suited the movie. Its not a movie about Superman flying about saving cats, saving kids, stopping robbers and trying to stop a man with his fat mate launching a couple of rockets, its much bigger than that, much more epic, Superman is saving mankind ! It is none stop action from start to finish and it is nothing like the original, Christopher Reeve has always been the Superman, but Henry Cavill has stepped into the role and the boots fit perfectly, he makes Brandon Routh seem a little bit of a wuss. Get to the cinema to watch this movie, it definitely deserves the backing, it deserves to make lots of money and deserves an amazing sequel and I can't wait !!!! 10/10
2-Headed Shark Attack (2012)
Just a few plot holes and a wuss of a teacher !
My first thought after watching this film was what a wuss Charlie O'Connell's character was, he gets a little cut on his leg and he is then rolling around on the floor like he has broke his leg, writhing in agony while his students carry him ! What a pussy ! This film was entertaining purely for its extreme stupidness, OK I know with a name like "2 Headed shark attack" it is never going to be taken seriously but this one did take the biscuit ! 1) They race the speed boats back to the main boat they are on for approx. 5 minutes, the main boat was only anchored about 300 metres off shore so it should have taken about 30 seconds max. 2) While they were racing the boats, sometimes the sea was dark and really rough, others it was crystal clear and as calm as a pond. 3) Who was the guy riding the bike along the path in the background when the group were investigating the island "Atol", it was obviously a holiday resort due to the paths and little wooden bridges everywhere and the director could not be bothered to re-shoot the scene after the cyclist rode by (not that re-shooting would have taken that much effort !) or they did just not notice him ? 4) When the skinny dippers got eaten there was no sign of the shark above the water, which was strange as the water was only waist deep and this appeared to be some monster shark, occasionally appearing to be 50ft in length, sometimes 20, sometimes less ! 5) The shark had the amazing ability of being able to dive tens of metres underwater when the water was only a few metres deep, it even did this on occasion while it was actually eating someone at the surface, it would be eating, it would dive down to the bottom, then be eating again all in a millisecond ?!?!??! 6) While they are trying to repair the boat, Carmen Electra feels the need to have a sunbathe on top deck, instead of looking out for her mate who is pretending to weld under the water, so her mate then gets eaten and nobody notices for half the film ! 7) When the shark gets bolder and eats the electric box, why do the 2 Spanish guys jump into the water to get eaten, its clear they jumped and did not fall as you see their knees bend. 8)Whats with the tidal wave and where does that come from and why when its about to happen do Charlie and Carmen start kissing as though they have had sparkling chemistry throughout the movie ? 9) Before the moment about, why do Charlie and Carmen separate from the kids ? OK I know the path cracked slightly but there was plenty of room to simply walk past it and follow the kids to safety. 10) With 3 people remaining and when a mass of not seen before rocks appear behind them, do the kids feel the need to talk about how they can out swim the shark, why not simply walk backwards in the knee deep water and climb onto the rocks to safety. 11) The Atol was supposedly built on coral, what the shark keeps biting away to help it collapse, but the beaches all sloped gradually into the sea, where did the shark go to do this ? 12) You know there is a giant 2 headed shark in the sea as you have just watched it destroy a boat and eat some kids, why get in a motorised dinghy and go back to the island, personally I would stay put. Anyway I am going on a bit now, there are plenty more interesting and fun plot holes and errors, which only adds to the enjoyment of this film, I do feel it did drag on for a bit i.e. the boat race could have been compressed to 30 seconds instead of 5 minutes etc., but its worth watching to just witness my list of errors and add to it. Oh yes just 1 more, there was no shock and surprise of the fact the shark had 2 heads, just the fear of it having 6000 teeth ! lol
Don't Be Afraid of the Dark (2010)
Definitely not worth the wait !
I wondered by this film took so long to find a release date, I now know, Del Toro must have realised while trying his best to edit the movie what a disaster he had made and was too ashamed to let it go, until finally he thought "hang on, i need to get some money back at least", then let it go. The movie is not frightening at all, its not suspenseful, all the acting apart from the little girl is wooden, I find it hard to say anything good about it ! Some tips if you buy a house with a stove in your cellar that your daughter has a funny attraction to; 1) If your handy man walks out of the cellar with a pair of scissors in his shoulder and a screwdriver in his eye, don't just assume he had an accident 2)If your daughter keeps insisting she is hearing voices, just have a look into it, it won't take 2 minutes 3)If your daughter tries to show you a photo of one of the gremlins she has been talking about but you did not believe her, just take a quick look 4) If some little gremlins do happen to attack you or run at you, KICK THEM AWAY, they are tiny and are easily crushable as we find out so have no strength, why be afraid of them really ? 5) If you see your wife get pulled into a stove by some small gremlins, show no emotion about it, just have a quick look down the hole in the stove, the move out with your daughter !
Personally if I knew i had small creatures in a stove in my cellar, I would call in someone to get rid of them, I would not just leave them there, I would try and flood them out, burn them out or even gas them, who in their right mind would just leave them !
Thats about me done, i hated this movie, thought it was a waste of a remake, the wife does not feel as harshly about it as me, she thought it was good, but she does not like scary movies, so that should tell you everything !
Falling Skies (2011)
I hope they all die at the end of season 1 !
Well, what can I say, another hyped up series that ends up being very disappointing, up to episode 5 and its just getting worse, I am a massive Sci-Fi fan, been putting this on in bed and I actually end up falling asleep towards the end of each episode (even fast forwarding the breaks), so it tells you that not much interesting is happening. Its like watching a low budget daytime family soap opera with a few low budget sci fi channel movie aliens and robots in the mix, the only thing missing being Thomas C Howell running past the windows. The aliens seem pretty useless to be honest, hence why nobody seems to show any concern that humanity was almost wiped out by them recently, everyone on the planet except this useless bunch must have been in a coma at the time. I am actually finding it hard to write anything positive about it, every other negative review has said it all. Even a guy at work who watches all kinds of junk says he got bored after episode 4 and has stopped watching it. I enjoyed and praised The Event and got slated, that was dropped by the network, this is complete garbage compared to that, so I guess it means this will at least get another season !
Battle Los Angeles (2011)
Did I miss the Aliens ?
I don't know if its Aaron Eckhart or the theme of the movies he is in, but like "The Core" the other "chance of the world ending as we know it" movie he was in, it does not seem to contain the feeling of "the end" if you get what I mean, while watching the movie you don't feel as though people are reacting like they actually would if the world was at threat. Like with The Core, its like they thought hey "if we drill to the centre of the earth and kick start it, everything will be fine", this is like, "Hey look at those meteors slowing down as they hit the earth, hang on a minute is that......, ah no its just aliens come to destroy the human race, nobody worry we will send in the marines and clear em out in no time". Don't get me wrong, if the day comes and we actually get attacked by an alien race, we don't know how we would react, it may seem that surreal we do react like they did in this movie and I could be totally wrong, but I sense there would be more shock from people as to what was going on around them than what the characters in the movie convey, to me the aliens may as well have been some Iraqi terrorists floating about the rooftops, it would not have made any difference to the film. What would have made a better film would have been Battle LA and Skyline combined, i.e. the surprise element of the attack, the Dyson vacuum style hover alien crafts with the battles from the marines on the streets from Battle LA, with the human race getting wiped out in the end, just to give you the feeling of hopelessness, we need a film like that for once
The Event (2010)
Amazed that is has been cancelled !??!?!
This show has been one of the best Sci-Fi series to come out for years, I enjoyed Lost but occasionally got "Lost" with it, The Event is not hard to follow, something happened during each episode leaving a cliffhanger and you wanting for the next. I can understand why NBC has cancelled another season due to a plummet in viewing figures, but I cannot understand their thinking, the pilot and subsequent episodes faired really well with great viewing figures, they decide to allow the show to have a 3 month break, without warning the show restarts at a later time in the schedule and on a different night (In the UK it went from 10pm on a Friday to 11.55pm on a Monday), I would not have noticed this, only did due to the fact I had it on series record on satellite TV so was able to resume my viewing, many people I think will have been unaware of this or unable to do this, I just don't think the viewing figures dropped due to it being a bad show, I think bad decisions by NBC and lack of advertising. It was truly an entertaining show, especially the last 7 or 8 episodes of the series when it all kicked off, its like an emotional roller coaster at the beginning you can sympathise with the Aliens and dislike the humans especially the president and his decisions but all that changes, I don't want to go into it too much but I think its a series that anyone could enjoy given a chance. There are the odd annoyances, there are a few plot holes and a few minor irritations i.e. the character Sophia, her acting at time was a bit wooden and emotionless, but I suppose you get people like that in real life, I know some myself. Anyway give it a chance and I am sure you will end up thinking like I do, hope they back another series, don't want to be left in another forever limbo with the fantastic cliffhanger of the final show of the series !
Stop being overly critical, its a good family movie !
Fair enough, the storyline and acting in this film are substandard, but after watching it I am positive it was not made for us to watch and walk away and to think Danny Glover made a great president !, John Cusack is a great action hero ! Both in my opinion were terrible but as others have mentioned, if you switch your brain off and watch the action, you will be blown away ! Yes it is far fetched, there is not a chance anyone would survive, I am sure when Mr Cusack fell into the crack in the Earth above the lava(before pulling himself back out to catch a plane once again), he would have melted ! The car would never have made it out of the first street in LA with all the devastation around it, they would all have died in the real world ! END OF MOVIE, is that what you would have all wanted, a disaster movie over in 25 minutes ?!? lol I do agree some scenes were not needed, Danny Glover being the patriotic President, not wanting to abandon a sinking ship etc. etc., that could have been cut from the movie, who would have given a toss, everyone was gonna be killed, who would have remembered how brave he was ? The president would have been the first on the plane !
My main gripe with this film was at the end, why were they so worried about the Ark they were in crashing into Everest, it had just about been bashed into every other mountain in the area with no concern or damage caused, so what made Everest so scary, "We need to get the engines going, otherwise we are going to hit Everest in 1500 metres!", my calculations were it took about 10 minutes from then before they started to hit so they were travelling at 5.62 miles per hour, hardly back breaking speed to cause concern, after all they must have used some sort of alien material to build the crafts after the hammering it took on the other mountains. Also the shock on their faces when they see Air Force one approaching the bridge of the ship, why would they be so worried, surely the glass had been built to withstand impacts like that, what did they expect, debris free tsunami's ?!?!?!?
Other than the other stupid near misses and the pointless love story, i.e. he kind of wants his ex wife and family back, but she is madly in love with new partner, kids think the new partner is great and love him like their own dad ........... "Anyone seen Gordy, my new partner ??" "He died love, crushed and mangled in a giant cog, very very painful though fast death, thats why the doors did not shut, you nearly drowned and we nearly crashed into Everest", "oh OK", She then throws herself into the arms of her ex who has saved the day by releasing the giant cog ! (not exactly what is said but its what should have been said.
All is all, I am contradicting my summary and am also being overly critical, its going to win as many Oscars as my writing wins booker prizes, but it is a good family action movie. Kids won't read too much into the acting and storyline, they will watch an enjoyable fun film and watch in awe. Get a extra large popcorn and enjoy, its worth watching on the big screen I would say, you won't get the same effects on a TV, so there would be no point in watching it at all !
Observe and Report (2009)
Not as bad as people have written..........give it a chance
To be honest I quite enjoyed this film, OK its not a laugh out loud all the time comedy but it does have its moments. Sometimes it comes across as a serious film and its gets confusing as to what sort of route its taking. I think the viewer needs to sit down, relax and watch it with an open mind, that way you will find yourself enjoying it. The premise of the film is basically about a Naive Mall Cop (Seth Rogan) who suffers from Bi-Polar, his aim in life is to become a Police officer, without going into too much detail and spoiling it, he sets his target of finding a Flasher that is terrorising customers of the Mall to prove to an investigating police officer (Ray Liotta) he is capable of doing his job. Along the way he tries to win the heart of a Make-up Clerk (Anna Faris) with miserable consequences. All in all, many films I have seen recently I have switched off halfway through, not interested in seeing what happens in the end, this I watched to the end. I thought the ending was good, can't see what other people thought was so bad about it, yes it was a bit harsh, but all was OK. Sorry about the review being a bit short on the info part, but did not want to reveal too much about it.
30 Days of Night (2007)
Should have been 3 Days of night - Don't read if you have not watched the film
To be honest I really enjoyed this film, thought it was a good addition to the horror genre and much better than some of the garbage that comes out these days. I thought the acting, effects and story were fine, my only problem with this film and maybe I am been a bit picky is: Day 1 Vampires appear and slaughter most of the town, a group of survivors head into an attic of an abandoned house; a couple of deaths later; Day 3 'Flashes up' there is a snow storm so they head to a weapons store and end up camping out there as the snow storm ends; Day 7 'Flashes up' (a few more deaths) the remaining survivors head to the police station and camp down; Day 27 'FLASHES UP', I was thinking WHAT ? they have camped out for 27 days in the police station eating what ?, why have the vampires not been around looking for these people, why would the vampires have hung around if there was no one left to eat, the survivors see a flashing torch light in a neighbouring house window and decide to investigate, why would you bother ?? Only 3 days to go till sunlight comes back and you take a pointless risk, anyway a few more deaths and in the end with only about 10 minutes till sunrise and Josh Hartnett decides to turn himself into a vampire to save his missus, who clearly was going to be OK anyway as she stood by the truck she was hiding under all the time he was fighting the head vampire and the fire never reached her anyway ! Like I say it was a good film but it would have been more believable had it only been 3 days of night, there was no real reason for it to have been called 30 days of night as Barrow in Alaska actually has around 67 days of night.