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Ten Little Indians (1965)
terrible version of a great story
I love Agatha Christie's original novel "And Then There Were None" but this movie version is terrible. I don't mind the fact that they changed the setting to a mountain in the swinging sixties, but this movie is silly on so many levels because of the changes. Most of the fault lays on the silly performances. One that stands out is the wooden and emotionless Hugh O'Brien as Lombard.Lombard is supposed to be a dashing and cool headed hero. However O'Brien is completely void of any emotion as people drop dead around him bringing it to the point of being ridiculous. No one can possibly remain that calm with people constantly dying around him. There is lots of silly dialogue such as after the first death a woman cries "he's dead drunk" and a man replies "not drunk, just dead." Charchters are changed to absurd cardboard cutouts. Reckless party boy Anthony Marston is now the lead singer of a rock band who ran over a newlywed couple. The most unforgivable change was the change of religious fanatic Emily Brent who pushed her maid to suicide, who is now an actress responsible for killing her rich husband. The stiffness of the majority is somehow balanced by the horrendous overacting of the maid and butler. The final straw was the cheesy ending which sadly is used in most versions were the secretary and the adventurer survive and fall in love and live happily ever after, replacing the darker and much more powerful ending of the book. Not recommended for hardcore Agatha Christie fans.
College Road Trip (2008)
Really Corny, but I had some fun
The is a completely trite and corny movie. A majority of the jokes are painful! The basic plot is that police officer James Porter (Martin Lawrence), the over over OVER protective father of Melanie (Raven-Symone) takes her across the country to look at colleges. She really wants to go to Georgetown but he wants her to go closer to were they live in Chicago. The "humor" of the films is just one flat joke after another. Everything that involved the pig that the little brother insisted on dragging everywhere with him was excruciating. They also encounter a hyper over caffeinated father and daughter (Donny Osmons and some girl I don't know) who basically annoy the hell out of everyone by randomly breaking out into song. Raven makes stupid faces and of course manages to squeeze in a well choreographed song, since it IS a Disney film. They visit the "CRAZY" grandma, I guess she is crazy because she dances salsa. The most painful joke was the old lady, living with crazy grandma, hiding from the "control freak son" by quivering under a blanket she places over her head. The only amusing parts of the film were the parts with Donny Osmond and the sky diving scene. I was actually involved with the making of this film. I was an extra in the scene were Raven and Martin Lawrence wildly drive a golf cart through a fraternity/sorority Greek festival. I had so much fun on the set of the film. Too bad I did not have as much fun in the theater.
Scary flawed entertainment
While I do feel this is a classic. There are certain parts that annoy me. First here are the good parts. The opening scene with Drew Barrymore is terrifying. It is heart pounding with the scenery and the blue of the TV screen giving a eery light to the set. On another high note Drew's blonde wig is fabulous looking and it is a shame that she is killed off so early, but it does catch you off guard, similar to what Janet Leigh did in "Psycho." It is suspenseful and filled with exciting chase sequences and clever kills. With the exception of the first scene there is not too much gore which makes this a good movie for people who like suspense but not so much blood. The not yet married Courtney Cox and David Arquette offer comic relief as the lovable Gail and Dewey! Now the down side. The whole movie is supposed to be a tribute to horror films. "Halloween" is constantly referenced and Jaime Kennedy's character has an uncomfortable obsession with Jaime Lee Curtis. In the end the charchter's reveals their motives where to be like charchters in the movies. He references some of my favorite horror films such as "Halloween," "Friday the 13th," "Carrie," "Psycho," and "Silence of the Lambs." What is so bad about it is that they overdo it with the movie references. It gets to a point where it actually kills all those other movies for me. If I were to remake the movie that is the only thing I would do differently is not make such a big deal out of being a "tribute." Overall plenty of chills medium amounts of blood and a few laughs make this a worthwhile choice!
Mars Attacks! (1996)
Don't watch this garbage!
Possible Spoilers: This is such a terrible film. I don't understand why exactly it has such a large fan base! It is not funny at all. What is so funny about watching people being constantly vaporized, and crushed, while these ugly ass aliens run around with laser guns going YAK YAK! What is so amusing about watching a golder retriever be vaporized for no reason? Now I'm a big dog lover so this scene in particular was very upsetting to me! What is so funny about a woman's head on a dog's body? That is possibly the most flat joke since "the Brady Bunch Vareity Hour!" Also, please don't give me that garbage about "Oh but you don't understand this movie was not meant to be good!" Now I like Tim Burton's "Ed Wood." That was a GOOD movie ABOUT bad movies, where as this is just simply a bad movie with a good cast. So I was actually expecting to be entertained by this film! I have now lost all respect I once had for Jack Nicholson, Glenn Close, and Tim Burton! Also many fans say "But Tim Burton was paying tribute to classic Sci-Fi films!" How the hell do you pay tribute to bad films? This movies is just tasteless, unpleasant, unentertaining and not funny at all!
Meet the Fockers (2004)
Has Weak Points but Is Overall Fun
This does not even come close to being as funny as the first movie, however it still made me laugh. Hunky and Geeky Ben Stiller and Stern Overprotective Robert DeNiro are what really make the movie work. But of course the best performance of the movie came from "Little Jack!" What brings the movie downhill is the overdone outrageousness of Hoffman and Streisand. Sure we expect them to be much more liberal than DeNiro's family. However they are almost a little too crazy, and were actually quite irritating! Streisand is without question the most irritating person in the entire movie. There is a scene were she gives DeNiro a message and basically climbs on top of them. I'm sorry but I've never seen a message therapist like THAT before, this scene was pretty stupid, even for a comedy. Blythe Danner and a majority of the other characters are basically just their for the sake of being their. Danner was much funnier in the first movie. Over all it's okay, however there are certain performances which make the movie work, as well as performances that don't make the movie work.
Psycho Beach Party (2000)
One of my Favorites!
This is one of my all time favorite movies! I only bought it yesterday and i have already seen it six times! It is hysterical and very fun! The plot revolves around a teenage beach bunny named Florence (Lauren Ambrose of TV's 'Six Feet Under') who has multiple personality disorder. She is sort of a combination of Gidget and Norman Bates! Anyway her friends start getting bumped off and she does not know whether or not her alternate personality Ann Bowman may actually be the killer. She is excellent, very funny, and a very talented and promising actress. Many other talented actors stand out such as the ditsy b-movie bombshell, the two gay surfer guys, the mean spirited cripple girl, and Florence's mother who is sort of June Cleaver after drinking too much vodka. From the high energy opening credits, to the unexpected ending it is non stop fun. (even the opening credits are entertaining!) Sure the surfing scenes are lame, but that adds to the movie's campiness. Nicholas Brendan (TV's 'Buffy the Vampire Slayer') did not stand out a whole lot but he did well with what he was given. One scene that is particularly fun is the 'Dance Fight'(You just gotta see it). The entire cast does a great job! Very original, very campy, and overall just very entertaining! Highly recommended!