Reviews written by registered user

8 reviews in total 
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90 out of 163 people found the following review useful:
Google Infomercial...that runs too long!, 18 September 2013

To be perfectly honest, I really like Google, it's not that I am against the brand or anything, and I even think their marketing campaigns are very intricate and subtle...and that's exactly why I hated this movie, it's not subtle at all.

The Internship, to sum things up, it's one of the longest infomercials I've seen in my entire life, and badly enough is also really boring at that; the actors do their best to make it look like an actual movie, they even succeed in the first 15 minutes of the film, but it's when Google takes the whole screen that everything goes down the drain...they even go in the "Google AdWords just saved an entire franchise" direction...

I think this is just a waste of time, if I wanted information about Google Drive, Gmail or Google Wallet I could have googled it right? I mean, there are youtube videos about those products, and there's a reason why people don't just waste their spare time watching those videos...well, now Google charged us to do it...

Oh and by the way, as a comedy it sucks big time, I did not laugh even once...

14 out of 26 people found the following review useful:
Boring and...well, boring!, 1 January 2013

First things first, I'm not against the fact that Peter Jackson and co. decided to stretch one book into three movies, after all it's the movie BUSINESS and it is of course and industry, so, no harm no foul.

The thing is, if you're into doing business at least try and deliver a good product, which is not the case with The Hobbit. Yes, technically the movie hasn't got many flaws, but, when it comes to the storytelling, you'll have a disappointing movie with a generic formula that actually repeats itself over and over again.

What do we have here? It will sound really familiar if you've seen The Lord of the Rings actually (and I have to say I love TLOTR trilogy), all characters aside, you have a Wizard convincing a Hobbit to go for an adventure, then a small group gathers, they all go on a quest...then they find orcs, thus they go to the Elf city to rest, then off they go to the mountains...more danger...then caves...more danger...then they watch as the horizon delivers a to be continued feeling...the end.

That's 3 hours of my life I'll never get's boring, it's repetitive, and it's The Lord of the Rings with different characters, that's all.

I say go watch TLOTR does not simply remakes that movie and calls it "The Hobbit" while not caring about the actual book at all...

Detachment (2011)
242 out of 273 people found the following review useful:
Best Movie of 2011, 27 November 2011

Saw this at a local film festival with little to no information about the movie whatsoever; little did I know this was going to become my favorite film of the year, and that's saying a lot given that 2011 has been a blast for moviegoers with new products by Woody Allen, Terrence Malick, Lars Von Trier and Clint Eastwood.

The movie revolves around an poignant substitute teacher (perfectly played by Adrien Brody) who arrives at a vicious school, where students go around bullying people (including the teachers) and basically throwing their lives directly to the dumpster…you know, teenage angst and such…I didn't grow up in the USA, so two important things I must say, a) I don't know if this is an accurate depiction of any given school in America and b) I can't relate with the overall chronicle, which brings me to my next point.

The beauty of this movie comes within the subtext, whether you can directly relate with the characters or not, the movie takes the message and widens its range so everyone is able to understand the actual meaning of the film. Let's clear things out, this film is not about a school or the basis of education, this is about trying our best not to give a damn about others as most of us just go around doing everything in our power to be happy ourselves with a lousy job, a loveless marriage, a constant sense of abandonment or basically a crappy life (all of the above portrayed marvelously in the film).

Films by Tony Kaye tend to be really visceral with a thin slice of optimism in the undertones, I think this time he just went mental about everything, in the end you'll leave the theater with a slight sense of hopelessness, almost as if you're destined to watch daily misery without the power to control anything but your own life, as if the only battle you must fight is the constant reminder that even when everything falls apart and slowly turns into dust, you can't change the world, you just have to avoid the world from changing you…This exposed stunningly in the final sequence of the movie.

Do yourself a favor, watch this film!

Martyrs (2008)
8 out of 15 people found the following review useful:
PLEASE! do not watch this movie, 7 October 2009

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

I can't remember the last time I wrote here but man, this is something I just NEED to say.

This movie is beyond ridiculous, is way past the line of being stupid just for the sake of it, I mean, and I'm trying to be polite here, this is the epitome of suckiness, this is a lousy story directed by the most unexperienced person ever.

The movie starts nicely, you've got a Japanese-like ghost there, a frightened child and a couple of blood stains in the title..."OK, you got me there I'm paying attention" then it builds up into something quite decent, you know, with a teen (wearing a hoodie) that's blowing people off with a shotgun...promising really...then everything breaks into little pieces of stupidity.

Yes, the spoilers are ahead. I respect French Cinema, I actually love French Horror, but to see a woman (after being skinned alive) talking to an old lady about how the afterlife is bliss or something that mildly passes as "awery", and to watch a bunch of really old people throwing a mid-afternoon party all dressed in black waiting for the aforementioned old lady to give a deep speech about how torturing people is cool because they end up looking like the characters of the latest Tool, that's just blatantly plain and makes me feel like going out there to plant a tree or something.

This movie is ridiculous, just like my last paragraph, it's not horror, it's not torture-porn, it's not terror or any of those's just a movie about how a girl can be dumb enough to stick around after her girlfriend (who just committed suicide BTW) blew the hell out of two adults and two young children...I mean, if you stick around to watch the corpses decompose I promise something weird will happen to you, why don't you just run the bleep away girl! Anyway, don't watch "inside" or "frontiers" instead, those are bad, but at least the gore and horror bits will make you sick and happy. I rather see a naked, hairy and very fat old man jumping in the grass than seeing this movie again.

1 out of 3 people found the following review useful:
Average Movie, 19 July 2008

I'm not sure what happened here, I'm a big fan of Quentin Tarantino, I've gathered even dolls and figurines of his movies...I'm also a huge fan of Kurt Russell, ever since I saw Tango & Cash a long time ago I fell in love with his attitude, he was the greatest "bad-A" in the movie business...

So what happened? The movie is one big blah blah blah! there's just one scene where everything seems scary and chilling, but that's it, one lonely scene in the entire movie, the rest of the time you'll find yourself drowned in girl chats and boring stories about irrelevant subjects, it's just non-sensical talk that goes on for endless hours.

So, it's still Quentin Tarantino directing Kurt Russell, there are some details here and there that are 100% worthwhile, but the movie as a whole is just tedious and really monotonous, sadly enough I bought the unrated version of the film(with extra footage)...I'm about to commit suicide...well, not really, at least they gave me a coupon for "Planet Terror", and that film is a true masterpiece.

1 out of 3 people found the following review useful:
A Classic Movie, Just Wait 10 Years And You'll See!, 19 July 2008

Burlesque all over the place ladies and gentlemen, this movie is all about making fun of the genre; so, don't expect to see a zombie movie with a deep hidden message (ala George A. Romero), "Planet Terror" exists only to entertain the viewers.

Now, even when the movie focuses on the "fun" factor, it also has great achievements inside the package, everything from the way the movie looks to the incredible editing makes this picture an amazing ride; yes, most of the errors were made on purpose, and who cares anyway, you have a film that already has a "classic" feeling, just imagine what people will think about it 10 years from now...

10 stars, this is my favorite Rodriguez movie!

5 out of 11 people found the following review useful:
I thought perfection was only a myth!, 19 July 2008

But it's not...

This movie is just perfect from the beginning to the very end; OK I was a little sad with a certain "two boats" incident, but even then the story was delivering something chilling! So anyway, to be honest and fair now, The Joker literally stole the entire movie, Batman is just a pawn this time, The Joker is what every single human in this world fears, the joker is your nightmare, it's my nightmare too...The Joker is "THE" human, the only part of a human being that won't ever stand corruption or greed, the joker is pure evil, he is the dark side that all of us hide, the side that does not need money or anything, that part that only wants to see the world burn, and believe me, that's scarier than anything else in the entire universe.

the last time I felt this way about a movie was when I saw "the Godfather", this time the movie is even more balance than anything I've seen before, this film has everything you could ask for in cinema.

I wish we could see more Heath Ledger in the next film...but wishes always turn to smoke, so what we have now is "The Dark Knight", the best movie I've seen in over a decade.

J-ok'el (2007)
12 out of 21 people found the following review useful:
Even the Music Is Flawed, 2 March 2007

I've been eager to write a review on this site for a while, I even registered a while ago but never wrote anything...but damn! I have to warn you all about this movie.

It's a hellish idiocy fest, the last time I saw a movie with flawed illumination I was like 10 and it was a black & white film. Anyway, the film is about "la llorona" a woman who killed her kids and then drowned herself in the river...the actual legend is really scary, but this movie just makes you laugh with the plot-holes, the bad acting and the general scheme of the movie.

I gave it two starts because the American guy knows how to act and how to convince the public, the rest of the film is just utter garbage ready to receive the vomit of the masses.

A huge stinker if you ask me!!