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Project Mc² (2015)
Four genius girls save the day - what's not to love?
We just got Netflix and discovered this show. Oh - My - Gosh! This show is the perfect blend of quirky science-y teen girls that may not always fit in with the "cool kids" and the unending excitement of "Spy Kids" movies.
Being late to the Netflix party we didn't even know this show existed until today. And we binge watched all three episodes! The story follows one trained spy who is placed in a school to perform one mission. She ends up making friends with three other girls in spite of her grating, left-brained and self-reliant attitude. Together they use their individual "nerdy" skills to save the world.
If you're a 9-13 year old and you loved "Spy Kids" or "Shark Boy and Lava Girl" you'll love "Project MC2".
Overly dramatic and uninspiring.
This movie was recommended to our family by the local elementary school. Unfortunately the entire movie is plodding and tired. It was like sitting through someone filing their nails for an hour.
The movie follows a surgeon and his family living in Denmark during the German occupation of WWII and their sober subterfuge of all things Jewish, including the people.
While the movie starts off slow, building the narrative of "German eyes everywhere", it culminates in a mediocre anti-climax that barely registers on the feelings scale. The characters try (very transparently) to become the underdogs while the evil Nazis go overboard to be seen as evil oppressors. While this is a typical story arch, Miracle at Midnight seems unable to grasp its own storyline with a touch of believability.
Save yourself the trouble and rent another movie. This one falls flat.
Left Behind (2014)
Could have been so much better, but it isn't.
TLDR: Movie is weak. Rent it for your relatives under 13 and they'll love it.
Let's start with this - If you're over 13 you won't like this movie. And this - I'm a 20 something Christian male (yes, we still exist) and I wanted this movie to be mind-blowing. Sadly, it wasn't.
Cons Vs Pros (Yep, it's reverse order so you're don't mistakenly think Pros wins.) Cons: 1. The acting is sad and stilted. Some actors are OK (the midget who's name I don't remember, Cage on occasion) but most are just horribly high-school level actors.
2. The writing is full of padding and over stereotyping. All boys do not want a baseball glove, particularly if they wear glasses and have pale skin. All Christians don't sound like the Westboro baptist church or wishy washy whine-bags.
3. The music is 1980's sitcom style. Lots of "scoobity doo do doo, you'll find your way, just look up to the sky" type movement and mood music. I want to call it predictable but that word is overused and doesn't really fit. It's more like... sense-dulling. It makes you want to have a glass of milk, cookies, and a long nap.
4. The directing is weak and amateurish. i.e. In the first scent the mom and daughter are having a phone conversation and instead of 2-3 location changes they swap back and forth for every sentence. It can make your head swim.
1. The message is semi-solid. As one passenger in the plane put it, "That's it?". Yes, that's it.
I'd pay James Cameron $4 billion to remake this movie with good actors and a great CGI budget. Maybe we should start a kickstarter campaign.
Madagascar: Escape 2 Africa (2008)
More swearing in kid's movies
Again, Madagascar goes the extra mile to expose our kids to swear words. Madagascar 1 spelled out the "S" word in what they thought was a cutesy way, "Oh Sugar-honey-Iced-Tea!", and to make sure your kids understand that swearing is A-OK with them they actually say the "H" word out loud in Madagascar2.
Granted, most childless homes have these words flying around without any censorship but in most homes with decent parents and children under 14 (which Madagascar 2 is marketed to) you'll see that people frown on this sort of behavior. It's not hard to act like a responsible adult and edit out the swearing in children's films. Why is it Dreamworks can't seem to figure this out? I want my $30.00 back.
The Iron Giant (1999)
Not for KIDS, but still an OK movie.
This movie surprised me. After reading the reviews online I thought this might be a great movie for the kids. Wrong! There are several instances where the characters use "colorful" language that kids under 14 probably shouldn't hear. Check the "Parental Advisory" page here on IMDb for the exact words and occurrances. You'll be surprised. We watched about 15 minutes of this till the first "who the hell" popped up then decided it wasn't really the show for us. No wonder it bombed at the box office. I'd have walked out had I been sitting in a paid-for seat with my kids in tow. It's sad too, because the wife and I watched it later and it was a decent movie. Maybe they should change the marketing strategy when something like this is released so it's NOT specifically targeted to younger viewers. It'd keep us *real* parents from having to stop the movie midway through.
Stargate: Continuum (2008)
Much better than the "Ark"
Pros: 1. This tied up things nicely through the plot so we don't have to look for some of the tired old goauld's running through the seasons anymore. 2. The old cast is back to a large degree. 3. Fills Sci-Fi gap that seems to have opened in the entertainment industry. 4. Has plenty of "woah ho ho ho! Look at that!" moments 5. Keeps a good healthy pace Cons: 1. There are several points where the characters just let things go (as mentioned in the other reviews) and it lends a feeling that the writer was red-pen marking things out just to fit a time constraint. 2. There's a new and over-the-top addition of swearing to the movie, which we could have done without. I watched this with my 10 year old, an avid SG1 fan, and had to stop partway through. It didn't add anything, even angst, to the movie. 3. The ending was anti-climactic and tied up a little too fast. 4. Tealc has hair.
Overall I think casual fans like myself will love this addition, while hardcore fans will blow it off as just another milking of the cash cow. There's a palpable dearth of good sci-fi programs on anymore (cry) and this really hit the spot. RIP Don Davis, btw.
The Ruins (2008)
Nasty, but nothing you haven't seen before
I'd have rated this a solid 2 out of 10 but after the first 20 minutes it actually picked up a little and morphed out of the usual (extremely stupid) teen style horror show complete with boobie shots and drunken dancing. It's almost like this movie was directed and written by two different people. It'll never be a classic but it did, by the skin of it's teeth, redeem itself by the middle. I particularly liked the "bad guy" and it's abilities. I won't go into details and spoil the movie but trust me, you'll enjoy it. Take a girlfriend or your wife and it should provide just enough of a fright to get her close. Just don't bring anyone under 18. No sense in adding to their already screwed up sense of sex and violence.
Son of Rambow (2007)
I heard about this "Awesome" movie at work and had to run out to see it. "It's geared to our age group!" I heard. Hmph. My age group may love Rambo but this crap is just insulting. I'll never get back the hour I sat through (walked out after that). It's S-L-O-W. It's brilliantly slow. I swear you'd have to film snails dating to get a slower plot with a climax much more exciting (the snails, I mean). I keep seeing that this was supposed to be a comedy, but where was the laughter? No one laughed in the theater. Maybe we're talking about different movies with the same title? That's the only way I can explain how horrible this was and how starkly contrasted these comments are to my personal experience. If you go to see one movie this summer make sure it's NOT Son of Rambow. YawnSauce x2.
Bend It Like Beckham (2002)
A gay movie
This movie was rotten. The acting was awful and the plot was mired in star crossed love triangles. There's even a homosexual section so everyone's properly offended. The only thing they didn't do here is kill a whale and run over a nativity scene with a satanic dump truck. You'd be better off watching a movie like the one with Will Farrell coaching a soccer team than seeing this dribble. Don't bother seeing this movie unless your tastes are horrible or you enjoy seeing 12 year old homos. It's enough to make the average person sick. Its no wonder they only ended up showing this movie in "limited theatres". No one went to watch it for good reason.
Good Luck Chuck (2007)
Porn by any other name
WTF? This was almost sickening to sit through for the first hour as boob after boob and hump after hump passed our eyes. I ended up having to edit the movie on my PC before watching it with my wife and our friends. Everyone fully understands the occasional boob-shot in an R rated movie, but come on! This was nakedness just to be naked. It wasn't even in context. Was this movie directed by a 13 year old boy with daddy issues? It just left us with a sick feeling and snarled faces. We wouldn't recommend this movie to anyone without the ability to fast-forward through the crap to get to the actual movie. Keep the remote handy.