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ayresryder
Reviews
Upgrade (2018)
OMG
I rated this a 10 but it's best to go into this movie not expecting much. You may be (giggles) shocked into an outburst of laughter at a few points. Seriously though, the script will be more appreciated some day, it just wasn't promoted well enough or something. Or maybe all people want to watch now are Marvel, James Bond, Mission Impossible, and Disney princesses any more.
Resident Evil: The Final Chapter (2016)
Nothing in this movie makes sense
At 64 minutes into the movie I was compelled to write this review that nothing in this movie makes sense. Also, my wife spent 20 minutes playing Sudoku rather than watching the movie. At least there are weird zombies, fighting, and explosions. But, for seriously, nothing makes sense in this movie. That is all.
Suicide Squad (2016)
Harley Quinn
Harley Quinn is a sexy cash cow that was bound to be monetized into a major motion picture and this movie is the quintessential form of what I know from the Harley Quinn Universe. I am a fan but I am not a fanatic. I did, however, grow up watching the Batman cartoon with Harley Quinn and that version of the joker and this movie is a perfect stamp from that mould. I read some bad reviews but I saw that the general consensus on the IMDb was about a 7 and that is always a good movie in my experience. Based on the previews I was impressed by the storyline and thought that over-all the movie was very well written, directed, and acted. And it did a good job of livening my interest in the Joker/Harley Quinn cartoon movies and continuations of that version of the Batman universe. You know, I think an aging generation doesn't get it but before watching this movie I saw previews for yet ANOTHER King Kong movie and it too looked like an exciting movie. I had to say, "it appears that Hollywood has run out of ideas" but apparently they've been saying that for 50 years. And with Bollywood coming out with amazing movies and the Russian Avengers getting interest in the United States it may be that the dust has settled in Tinseltown and another region of the world gets a turn at being the glory hole. We shall see about that, but I rate this movie as a ten because there's no amount of money or talent that could have made this a better movie. It's too bad our standards are so high that the populous just doesn't get that the passion has been dimming for a while. A person who is fat and happy can still do a good job but they can't make magic. That is a privilege relegated to the poor, the hungry, and the undiscovered.
The Demon's Rook (2013)
Oh Thank God, B-Movies aren't dead after all
Bloody, gory, hilarious, sexy, campy, repetitive. These words are all you need to know about this movie. If Evil Dead (or Ash vs. Evil Dead) had a weird Wiccan cousin, this would be it. In the true art of low budget B-movies this delivers in every way. It's not just some other half-assed low budget movie as I was beginning to think were all that were left for our future. The Devil's Rook was made by a group of thoughtful and passionate young people who obviously had a lot of fun doing what they were doing. And while they did well, the actual storyline of the movie drags on, this would be a good party movie because it's mostly eye candy so you can talk through it without missing anything. Also, it has plenty of good nudity!
A Good Marriage (2014)
Complete Waste of Time
I have a bachelor's degree in philosophy, I have a quote, "you can learn just as much from a bad teacher as you can from a good teacher", I have spent hundreds of hours playing idle games, I have maxed out the timer on dozens of other games at 99:99:99 just leveling up on rpg games, I have read numerous Stephen King books (old school and new school), and I am very familiar with how they translate into movies, and I have never, ever, never, never, ever rated a movie with a rating of 1.
I wouldn't even dare you to watch this movie because it'll tempt King to sell books of blank pages and movies of complete and utter nothingness. The end is nigh!