nebilcs-168-165298 Reviews

13 Minutes (2021)

So bad it's... terrible...

[1/10 · 23 February 2022]

Oh my.

This film is Strong On The Message. Young white men? Irresponsible, untrustworthy and selfish - unless they're LGBT in which case they're OK once they come out. Old white men? Racists, homophobes and heedless of personal safety. Women? Victims of the patriarchy - unless they're Christian in which case they're judgemental and uncaring. Illegal farmworkers? Hardworking heroes just making a living.

I feel quite sorry for the tornado which was denied any representation and failed to kill any of the hilariously badly-drawn characters meaning that there isn't one redeeming thing about this film. Not a single one.

Doctor Who: Eve of the Daleks (2022) Season Unknown, Episode Unknown

One good thing about this episode. Just one....

[2/10 · 2 January 2022]

Rewatching this episode and cheering then taking a drink every time the Doctor Impersonator gets blasted by a Dalek could well become a New Year tradition.

That's the praise over, now I'll be selective with the criticisms.

First off - OK, so it was only the Dalek fleet which was destroyed by the Flux, not the entire race? I must have heard differently... Well anyway, like a verruca they're still hanging around but now with a new Gatling gun (cool) which cannot aim straight even down narrow corridors (not cool) and is lethal only when their victims oblige by standing still and waiting.

Secondly, Dan. Once again, he is written as the dumb assistant who adds a line here or there, has a brief heroic moment then lapses into the background again. At least this time he had a significant part to play in forcing Yaz to confront Chibnall's obsession with her attraction to the completely unlikeable Doctor Impersonator. And Dan only fell short of rubbing his hands together with a lecherous grin at the thought of travels through space and time in a small box with this unspoken relationship turning physical.

Thirdly, creepy stalker/collection fetishist gets the girl? Nothing unusual about that; possibly Chibnall is drawing on personal experience there.

Fourthly, the actual story? No real threat or tension after the first loop through - having one of the characters irrevocably die would have lent some depth to the story but no, we can have adult relationship themes but no deaths, because of the kids of course.

At least the drinking game concept has legs...

Doctor Who: Flux: Chapter Six - The Vanquishers (2021) Season 13, Episode 6

As good as expected

[1/10 · 5 December 2021]

Chibnall's egotistical and insulting retconning of the Doctor's origins remains in place and a pathetic premise is served by a pathetically OTT characterisation of the Doctor himself supported by weak and ineffectual men and superwomen who are always knowledgeable way beyond their learned experience rush everything to a pathetic conclusion. So that's most of the universe and the entire Dalek, Cyberman and Sontaran fleets wiped out, yeah? Clean slate... can't wait to see what new threats emerge in the future...

Oh wait, the NYD teaser dropped. Daleks again.

Time to put the crayon away Chibnall.

(Edit: and another thing, Dan's voice has gone so high pitched it's no wonder he summoned a fleet of dog-men)

Doctor Who: Flux: Chapter Three - Once, Upon Time (2021) Season 13, Episode 3

Dreadful and confusing

[2/10 · 15 November 2021]

Evil white male protagonist - check.

Jodie Whittaker running around jabbering away - check.

Recycling old enemies for fan service - check.

Chibnall's retconned pre-Hartnell Doctor - check.

Might as well have just got all those tropes out of the way in the first 10 minutes and saved a whole heap of time. Pun not intended.

Second star was for yer wan's accent which was at least an interesting challenge to tackle while the story pinballed around.

Doctor Who: Flux: Chapter Two - War of the Sontarans (2021) Season 13, Episode 2

Better than last week's episode

[5/10 · 7 November 2021]

Sontaran story arc - relatively interesting but for a race genetically designed for warfare they're pretty lousy shots when targeting a fleeing Scouser and have they really not come up with a defence for being smacked on the back of the neck?

Rushed (and ludicrous) resolution for the Crimea portion, rushed resolution for the Liverpool portion which had potential to be much more interesting. Dan's actions are inconsistent with his lack of experience and he's frequently coming across more dopey, flat and dull than Ryan Sinclair which is really quite an achievement.

Not really interested in Evil Vision and his entourage at all, they don't have the presence or threat of a Davros or the Master.

The usual Chibnall tropes feature - old white men being foolish and bigoted, thank goodness for strong diverse female characters saving the day...

But for all that, the episode was coherent, the tropes were relatively understated and there was enough improvement on the incoherent mess of the first episode to keep this viewer engaged - for now.

Doctor Who: Flux: Chapter One - The Halloween Apocalypse (2021) Season 13, Episode 1

Too much rush

[2/10 · 31 October 2021]

Opening scene truly dreadful and what followed was a lot of rushed dialogue, strong female characters (obeying the Chibnovitch Limitation that males must be either weak or easily defeated evil protagonists) and a whole heap of rushing around for the sake of rushing around. Pyrotechnics at the Tardis console aren't a viable substitute for building tension through plot and dialogue and so far John Bishop is acting like a character from Bread.

Another Life: How the Light Gets Lost (2019) Season 1, Episode 8

Someone else got there first :(

[1/10 · 22 September 2021]

I'm disappointed to find another reviewer already declared this the worst episode of sci fi they had ever seen. I've watched whatever I could from the Golden Age of the 60s/70s through to the 2020s... I've put up with bubblewrap aliens, detergent bottles dangling from strings masquerading as attack fleets... and yes, there were hits and misses, forgettable stories or daft premises. Until now, the honour of being the Worst Episode was a tie between Dr Who's "Orphan 55" and "The Timeless Children" for the dreadful eco-lecturing of the former and the fully-intentional legacy defilement of the latter.

But not now. Take a bow "How The Light Gets Lost". There is literally nothing redeeming about this episode. The plot doesn't advance one iota and instead there is a bizarre and tasteless aside into drug-fuelled sexual abandon into which even the ship's AI enthusiastically throws himself. I could at least understand the motivations for the Dr Who writers to script those two episodes even if I didn't agree with them. But how and why anyone signed off on this episode of sub-space-prawn in what was already a tough watch is completely beyond me. I actually felt sorry for the actors involved; some scenes must have been particularly demeaning and to no useful or worthy end.

Another Life: I Think We're Alone Now (2019) Season 1, Episode 6

Here am I floating outside my tin can

[3/10 · 17 September 2021]

Oxygen burns in a vacuum, apparently.

Also, exotic matter which destroys organic matter "on an atomic level" permits sufficient time to deliver a moving final few sentences despite the fact most of it would first have attacked the lungs what with all that yelling and shouting. Definitely no time for a poignant closing speech. It would have been far more effective had the body just been found as the puddle it ended up - which would also answer the question of why, if the exotic matter was still actively digesting its victim, it didn't transfer to the first responder.

The spoiling of a reasonable premise with very decent sets and high production values by providing it with a teen drama script, inconsistent science and unlikeable characters having emotional breakdowns every 5 minutes is almost criminal.

The Blacklist: Konets (2021) Season 8, Episode 22

Where do we go from here?

[5/10 · 9 July 2021]

The only reason ever to have watched this series has been Spader's portrayal of Reddington. Like Tony Soprano, here is a villain fleshed out as a consistent, credible and pious anti-hero, pious at least by his own moral standards. Such a Machiavellian protagonist never needed a Liz/Soviet backdrop at all, a calculated partnership with the FBI to clean out his opponents would have been sufficient motivation without any overarching (and tiresome) family obligations. The successive reveals in the first few seasons were interesting enough, but as the series' progress seemed to hinge on continuing the mystery, the plot tangled itself up in ever increasing knots to the point of absurdity, a challenge eagerly grasped by what appears to be an apprentice writers' team.

Suffice it to say, I'm willing to bet that Reddington's mystery ailment is cervical cancer.

Manifest: Mayday: Part 2 (2021) Season 3, Episode 13

Struggling...

[7/10 · 20 June 2021]

A 6 season arc was laudably ambitious but there just hasn't been the depth and tension to sustain the interest past this third and (most likely) final season. "Lost", to which it is frequently compared, had a similarly beige lead male protagonist but set up many compelling mystery strands even in the first few episodes, significantly helped by a variety of contexts in flashback sequences and by a wider range of characters, each of whom had their time in the spotlight. But the mysteries wouldn't have been enough by themselves, the momentum was kept up by intriguing and well-written heroes, villains and those still to choose sides. Manifest has certainly had its moments but increasingly finds itself in soap territory and the mystery is too narrow to allow substantial progressive revelation and to keep the viewer engaged. The audience aren't fools - if you state it's a 6 season arc based around one mystery event, it's pretty obvious that seasons 2-5 can be skipped. Padding out the narrative with one too many character allegiance swings doesn't help (and the less said about Angelina's story arc the better...).

Judging by these three seasons, there is probably ample scope to condense the remaining three seasons into one and thereby end up with a punchy finale. I genuinely hope this happens and there's an opportunity to conclude what has been an interesting story.

The Blacklist: Misère (2021) Season 8, Episode 14

Dreadful

[1/10 · 26 April 2021]

For me, anyway, the appeal of The Blacklist is 100% down to Spader/Reddington (hard to tell where one ends and the other begins) and their schemes and interactions with an elaborate criminal underworld. The FBI characters would necessarily just be a wooden backdrop for him to play against. Other characters have come and gone - Kaplan and Glenn standing out in terms of strength and interest - but ultimately the entertainment is in Reddington himself.

Keen served a purpose in his initial approach to the FBI and the first couple of seasons worked out quite intriguingly as his relationship to her was unveiled. But since then, honestly, the flip-flopping of her love/hate for him is beyond boring - and what difference does it make if Reddington's back-story is that of a Russian asset or CIA double-agent? What's interesting is what he's doing now.

Something seems to have gone wrong in the writing of this series - as others have pointed out, there is no way that Keen could possibly throw together a meaningful alliance to bring Red down, particularly not if as suggested, she is having psychotic episodes seeing a long-dead but better-written character. This story arc, coupled with Reddington himself improbably abandoning his customary discretion and succumbing to a (hitherto undepicted) romantic streak by falling head over heels for a random bird-watcher - even reversing his decision to terminate his relationship before it had begun - suggests the solidity of the early series' writing has given way to a series of confusing, contradictory and chaotic unchecked first drafts.

Evidently we are approaching the end but it would be respectful of the series' legacy to have Keen written out as soon as possible so as to give Reddington full emphasis in the closing episodes.

The One (I) (2021)

Two episodes is quite enough

[3/10 · 26 March 2021]

Can't comment on faithfulness to the book as I haven't read it but can say, based on the first two episodes, that this falls somewhere between bad sci fi and police procedural. And fall it surely does. The absoluteness of the premise, the arc of research geneticist to corporate wolf (seemingly overnight) and the choices and actions of the protagonists are all just too much to accept. Reading some of the reviews suggests that things don't get better so that's me out. None of the characters are particularly sympathetic, there is no compelling mystery to encourage continued viewing and other than the premise itself, there's no sci fi to speak of. Pity.

Aliens: Zone of Silence (2017)

Not the worst FF example

[6/10 · 11 October 2020]

It's not the best but it is far from the worst. The FF genre rarely delivers a fully fleshed-out scenario or compelling special effects and so the skill (or lack) is whether the journey itself is watchable and whether there are enough twists or fresh ideas to sustain interest over the run time. On the negative side, a *lot* of belief suspension is required, the Mexican desert doesn't seem like the optimal place for a single American female to journey through. even more so with substantial equipment, supplies and no transport for the most part. The beautiful desert scenes mostly carry the film while the remote assistant's domestic footage seems largely out of place.

On the plus side, the lead actress did a good job, there were successfully-crafted moments of tension and a few flourishes which took my rating over halfway.

The Wretched (2019)

Easy-watching

[8/10 · 5 August 2020]

There's nothing demanding about this, it's a little edgier and cleverer than normal teen horror and takes itself seriously. There are some effective moments and it is quite dark at times. Obviously a lot is borrowed from older material (eg. Disturbia) but it's handled well and the run-time is about right.

Truth About Demons (2000)

Stick with it.

[7/10 · 14 July 2020]

I was poised to abandon watching after the first few minutes which weren't promising, but it slotted into an interesting rhythm and was worth the watch. It was more psychological horror than scare and it's a pity it didn't spend a little more time on the latter as what's there is pretty good. Very clever overall given the limitations.

Underwater (2020)

Ugh - no.

[2/10 · 10 June 2020]

I wouldn't normally write a review while still watching the film in question but this is bad, bad bad.

Within a minute or two of runtime, we are into chaos mode, a bunch of people we don't know, don't have any affinity with and can't yet relate to are suddenly thrown together and have to make their way to safety. Once disaster hits, there is no space to breathe, just a continuous stream of action with no tension whatsoever. There were set-pieces which, in the right hands, could have been effective but with no connection to the characters, were just tickboxes for the attrition.

This movie is another example of the failure to recognise that what is imagined by the viewer can go way beyond the skills and budget of a filmmaker, something Kubrick and Ridley Scott understood when they left space for silence to do the talking, or kept their antagonist's form indistinct and vague.

Pity.

There Are Monsters (2013)

Worth persisting with!

[8/10 · 9 June 2020]

Underneath the excessive wobble-cam is a really solid movie. The jump scares are effective without being gratuitous, the FX are restrained (all the more unsettling for it) and the acting is way above expectations for the genre. And it is clever, too. Recognising that the battle for engagement is won or lost in the first few minutes' runtime, the movie chooses non-linear over the normal linear method of character establishment in found footage and drops straight into the unnatural from the off. It gives an indication of what the movie promises to - and does - deliver.

The only negatives are the wobblecam and random close-ups (unwatchable at times, I had to look away rather than risk nausea but missed nothing of relevance) plus a couple of improbable escapes. Look past those and this is a really rewarding watch demonstrating that genuine creativity and effort can surpass budgetary constraints.

I Am a Ghost (2012)

Low budget does not mean low quality

[9/10 · 16 March 2020]

Really enjoyed this - and I didn't expect to. The opening montage wasn't promising and looked like other run-of-the-mill attempts at style over substance but I checked the reviews which recommended to stick with it... and I'm glad I did. Everything fell into place and the result was an engaging, clever and occasionally jump-scary film. There are a few small issues - anachronistic dialogue and the psychic sounded a little like Majel Barrett's computer voice - but none of this detracted from what was a really entertaining watch.

Whistle and I'll Come to You (2010 TV Movie)

Confused rewrite missing the point of the original

[3/10 · 18 January 2020]

The original story describes the horror when the supernatural breaks out of the confines of abstract theory and scornful dismissal into a very real manifestation. The sense of growing dread which begins with the question carved into the whistle is conveyed brilliantly in Jonathan Miller's version.

Not so in this version. Despite sharing many of the elements of the original, with a superb actor in John Hurt and with a far superior budget, this production can only be seen as a confused mess.

There is no whistle, just a ring. The whistle is critical for summoning this ancient menace - for what reason was a ring seen as an appropriate substitute? A play on words for the smartphone age?

And what is this ancient menace ? Miller's version never answered this question; it never needed to. In this version it seems the wife's disembodied spirit was doing the haunting - and if so, why was the manifestation so aggressive and frightening? Was she annoyed he didn't bring her along?

It would have been more coherent to drop the horror element altogether and turn it into a romantic ghost-of-sorts story whereby the couple could be reunited at the place they had enjoyed so much.

Doctor Who: Orphan 55 (2020) Season 12, Episode 3

Dreadful

[4/10 · 16 January 2020]

Yes, I think everyone involved with the concept and writing could do with a holiday.

Phobia (2008)

Surprisingly enjoyable and good quality

[7/10 · 8 January 2020]

I enjoyed this film very much despite having limited expectations. Each of the four segments plays out smoothly with few cheap scares and reasonably coherent plot development. That said, none of the chapters are particularly scary and it's all stuff we've seen before. What set it apart for me was the wry ingenuity of Man in the Middle and one small detail in The Last Flight - at one stage when the stewardess is serving the Princess, sunlight reflection from the aeroplane window moves slowly across the bulkhead behind as if the plane is banking. A nice touch. I can overlook that the galley interior is of a much larger plane than the 737 portrayed externally :-).

21 Days (I) (2014)

Quite watchable

[5/10 · 21 December 2019]

Definitely derivative of Paranormal Activity along with the standard 'Native American Burial Ground' fare of The Shining, Amityville Horror etc. but... the production team did a reasonable job, the paranormal effects were sensibly minimal, there was little tedious padding and there were a few mildly unsettling moments. Not a classic but neither a skip-forward, an OK watch.

1974: La posesión de Altair (2016)

Rewarding effort

[8/10 · 10 December 2019]

The trouble with the constraints of Found Footage is the difficulty of coming up with anything original in what is undeniably a flooded - and largely uninteresting - market. I wasn't expecting much but this film surprised me by going a long way towards delivering something different. Firstly the lo-fi video made a pleasant change and the lack of clarity was used to great effect for background menace in one or two scenes. Secondly, while the fate of the protagonists was made clear at outset per FF convention, the plot took some unexpected turns to arrive there.

It has a few flaws and evidently the budget was limited for special effects but this didn't detract from the experience. I would recommend this as a superior example to anyone with an interest in the Found Footage genre.

I Remember You (2017)

Atmospheric and satisfying

[9/10 · 16 September 2019]

Starting with the minor negatives: just a few minutes longer than necessary, whilst never losing interest, it did unnecessarily lose a little pace. Plotwise, definitely one or two implausibilities.

Otherwise, a wonderful piece of work, linking the spectacular and harsh scenery with the backstories of the protagonists who all acted brilliantly. The supernatural elements are given a very light touch - this is a mystery with horror elements rather than the reverse - but I was genuinely surprised at how the plot strands took a turn I absolutely did not see coming. It's been a long time since a film carried that off successfully for me. Bravo!

Impossible Horror (2017)

Atmospheric, weird ...and very watchable

[8/10 · 7 September 2019]

The basic premise is simple enough but then the plot wanders into the surreal, thankfully never so far as to lose coherence but all the same, the story spends most of its time in what looks to be an alternate reality shared almost exclusively by the two protagonists, a security guard and a dozen hooded figures. There's only a vague explanation as to the background or course of events but that's in keeping with the general theme. High standards of camera work and compelling acting by the two female leads, Hannah in particular delivering lines and action with a directness essential to balance the wandering weirdness. An enjoyable watch with an appropriate runtime.