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holycrapitsandrew

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9 out of 11 people found the following review useful:
Brilliant in its stupidity, 19 January 2006
10/10

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

Just when I thought the genre of the rock opera had faded away, R. Kelly released this masterpiece, a romp through the world of infidelity with an R&B twist. Bad rhyming is a staple, with words being brilliantly rhymed with themselves and elements of the plot added solely for the purpose of creating rhymes (in the director's commentary, R. states that he gave the main character a Baretta because he "needed a rhyme for dresser). The plot is an emotional roller-coaster, with each additional character having slept with at least two other characters, allowing for the audience to play "Who'd they bang?" every time someone walks onto the screen.

As for the music, R. Kelly provides the voices of all the characters, carefully crafting his 45-minute opus to the tune of one simple beat that is reminiscent of the drumbeat from a Casio keyboard.

Oh... and there's a midget. An asthmatic one. Who craps himself. And R. Kelly tries to do a Midwestern accent.

Essentially... Trapped in The Closet is an incredible work of art, masterfully crafted with the college students looking for good drinking games in mind. Take a shot whenever someone is caught cheating or somebody pulls a gun on someone else, then last person alive wins! For added difficulty, take a gulp of beer every time you laugh at the ridiculous rhymes.

In short, see this movie. It's incredible, garnering a 10 on the Unintentional Comedy Scale. You won't regret it.