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Just A Bad Movie
When I first saw previews for "Stop-Loss," I thought, this could be a great movie. Unfortunately, I was way off in my assumption. If you thought "There Will Be Blood" was boring, imagine what it would have felt like if there weren't any good actors in it. Can you picture it in your mind? Good. If not, go see "Stop-Loss." Our hero, Ryan Phillipie (however you spell it)goes to war in Afghanistan (which we never see) and then to Iraq. He comes home, is stop-lossed, and decides to stand up to the system and NOT go back to fight the ridiculous war George Bush got us into. Trouble is, you don't like him. You don't like his dumbass Texan buddies. You don't even like the blonde chick he rides around with. I won't spoil the ending, but trust me...it's worse than you'd imagine. Overall, it's a bland statement about a war nobody likes thinking about anymore. I was glad to see it end as I'll soon be glad to see the actual war end.
The Bank Job (2008)
The Best Heist Movie In Years
I expected this movie to be somewhat entertaining, and maybe a bit cheesy. After all, it's not difficult to muck up a heist movie. However, this film gets it all right. The acting is top notch, the story is not only engaging and clever but TRUE (!), and the experience of seeing it is thoroughly enjoyable.
The only complaints I have of the film are that the characters do get a little cheeky from time to time (but hey, they're British, so it's kind of expected), and there's a couple flashbacks/lapses in time that are initially confusing - although everything is clearly laid out about halfway through. Want to see a good movie? Check this one out!
Guns, Blood, Boobies = Fun Movie-Going Experience
Let's keep this short and sweet. If you enjoy the video games, you will more than likely enjoy the movie. It's very easy to follow, the acting can be downright terrible at times (but very solid from Olyphant who was a GREAT choice to play Agent 47), the special FX are loud and neat to look at, there's lots of explosive action-packed gun fights, and the hot chick gets naked. The only thing I have against the film was that it was a little dull and awkward in the beginning, but it picked up about 15 minutes in and kept it rollin' until the ending. Oh, and the hot chick gets naked.
You want to go to the movies and have a discussion afterwards? Go watch "Lions for Lambs." You want to go have a fun time at the movies with your friends? Check out "Hitman." Word on the street is there's lots of blood and explosions (and a hot naked chick).
Quite Possibly The Worst Action Movie Ever Made
I love action adventure movies. Indiana Jones, Jurassic Park, and yes, Pirates of the Caribbean. But not this movie. Not by a long shot. Whereas the first movie was fun and original, and the second one a little more cartoony but just as entertaining, this third Pirates film just nose dives, completely missing that mark each and every time.
Jack Sparrow was such a cool character in the first two pirates films. He seems so uncomfortable here. Depp almost appears bored with the part. Orlando Bloom is not a good actor. He's annoying, and I have no idea why. Furthermore, his character is a pain to watch. Whose side is he on? What is he fighting for? Why should I care? He is, at this point, the only thing making it possible for there to be an overblown cliché love triangle between Jack, Elizabeth, and Will. And folks, men and women, you're not watching Keira for her acting. She's not good at that. But looking hot in just about anything (less is more, in this case) is something she does exceedingly well. I'll watch her for that. Other performances - dull. Drawn-out. Uninteresting. But I will say this: the best overall performance in this film comes from Jack Davenport, as Norrington. He plays it with such conviction, such sincerity, than even the dumbest of lines sound decent coming from him. The storyline sounded as though it could open a unique chapter in the story when he reappeared in Pirates 2, but I believe audiences will be very disappointed in how he's handled in this film.
The plus side - good special effects. Negative side - everything else. Boring and dull performances all around (except by Davenport), a very slow and often confusing storyline that went no where without explosions or action sequences (the movie could lose forty-five minutes), and the broad sense that this film was both too rushed and too poorly conceived. Had the writers been given a couple years to really pound out a good script, the movie would have been as good as the other two. Instead, it truly stands out as being one of the worst movies I've ever seen.
True To Itself and HILARIOUS
This is the official Aqua Teen Hunger Force movie...and it delivers only as Aqua Teen can. Master Shake, Meatwad, Carl, the Mooninites....everyone's here, with a couple fun cameos here and there.
Non-fans take note - if you've never seen the show, this movie will likely make NO SENSE WHATSOEVER. Here's something you might not know either: it's meant to be that way. The movie is as random and inappropriate as the TV show, and I loved every minute of it.
There are a few times when the movie slows down, but you have to admit that it has one of the most catching opening sequences. You almost HAVE to watch it after that...and chances are, you'll probably love what you see.
Too Much, Too Fast
I was anticipating "Syriana" like a fat kid anticipates the ice-cream truck on a summer's day in the Persian Gulf. Only thing is...that ice-cream truck never shows up. Especially not in the Persian Gulf.
The same is true with "Syriana." This 2 hour-plus movie feels like eight hours on a bumpy flight. The dialogue is delivered at such a fast pace, and is chock-full of nuances, metaphors, and political innuendos. I'm not an ignorant American like, say, the President is, but this movie was way too confusing. The seven or eight separate story lines that the film kept jumping back and forth through were difficult to follow. And performance-wise, nobody really stands out. Most scenes feel like the director gave the actors a list of statistics and turned on the camera and said, "Now repeat what you just read." I will say that the cinematography was impressive and the soundtrack was slightly less annoying than "The Weatherman" (by the way...what is it with the glitch-techno crap filmmakers seem to be putting into EVERY movie that comes out?). Matt Damon and George Clooney are fun to watch. Everyone else is either too underdeveloped or boring, to put it simply.
And in conclusion....we know the oil business is corrupt and evil and blah, blah, blah. If you want to soapbox your point-of-view, then do so. Otherwise, take the time to write a good story and make a GOOD movie about the corruption of the oil industry. If you can't do either...don't waste our time.
The Greatest Adventure Movie of All Time
When Steven Spielberg and George Lucas came up with the idea of "Indiana Jones," he was essentially a comic book character who highly resembled James Bond, mixed with the ruggedness of James Dean or Marlon Brando. With "Raiders of the Lost Ark," we see this exact character. In "Temple of Doom," we see another side of Indy: his humor and his humanity (he's not invincible). However, we see the most important side of Indy in "Last Crusade": Henry Jones, Jr. We see the man, and Harrison Ford brings the character to such life.
There is never a point in this particular installment of the Indiana Jones trilogy when the audience knows Indy is going to make it out in one piece. Here, we see tension, fear, and doubt. Indy isn't dealing with Indian rituals or solely with Nazis: he is dealing with the powers of God.
In my opinion, this is by far and away the absolute best film in the Indiana Jones trilogy, and easily the most perfect adventure film ever made.