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I'm a reader of The Guardian. Feel free to stereotype, you'll be pretty close.
My favourite drink is tea (whether herbal or otherwise).
My favourite swear words are 'wanker' and 'bollocks'.
The sandwiches that I've brought to work today are margarine, marmite and crunchy peanut butter on brown bread.
My favourite sleeping position is to lie on my right side with both arms hanging outside the bed.
I smoke roll-ups - that sweet, sweet 'Drum' tobacco.
I don't like alcohol but I do drink it, on occasion, out of social pressure. I tell a lie, I actually like red wine but I rarely drink it. Give me a cup of tea instead, please.
Music Likes: Well, anything and everything except The Stereophonics, really.
Three favourite albums:
1. Husker Du: 'Zen Arcade'
2. Public Enemy: 'It Takes A Nation Of Millions To Hold Us Back'
3. The Beatles: 'The Beatles'
Three favourite films:
1. What's Up, Doc? (1972)
2. Scott Pilgrim vs. The World.
3. Trust (1990)
So awful it's fantastic. 1 or 10 out of ten, depending on how you look at it.
One evening,while channel surfing, my friend and I came upon this film on TV. In its own way, it was more astonishing than anything by Kurosawa, David Fincher or Takeshi Kitano. We simply couldn't believe what we were watching. We sat there as dumbstruck and as open mouthed as if we were watching Elvis doing his shopping in the local Sainsburys store. How could any film be such a complete failure? Even awful films usually have some saving grace, some ray of light, that stops your viewing being a completely worthless experience - one good performance or one funny line or even just some good scenery. 'Bullseye!', however, exists entirely in a vacuum; in a cinematic black hole. The script: No good. The acting: No good. The direction: No good. The editing: No good. Even the music: No good. Yet, later, I realised that the ray of light that I'd been looking for was actually in the fact that the film was such a total, glorious misfire and, if one watches it from that perspective, it's a wonderful film. The next time it came on TV I made sure to tape it and every so often I watch it again, in awe at its uselessness. It's nothing against Michael Winner personally. I'm sure he's a lovely bloke but, as a film maker, he makes a magnificent restaurant critic.