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Alright. So it might not be the most perfect film ever. It may have random green screen for outside scenes. But you know what? It is entertaining. Talon is, honestly, a cool character. And The Savage does a good job playing the character. He's an assassin, that isn't exactly human...and when he is hired to kill a woman he knows as a friend, trouble happens. Sound familiar? Of course it does. But it has enough original elements in it to make up for it. Heck, he even has a cool name. Movie also has some other great characters, like that cowboy. It's comical, it's fun, and it is worth watching at least once. I caught the screening at the Pittsburgh Horror Festival, and it was one of the better films. Check it out if you get the chance. But don't expect The Godfather.
Unrated: The Movie (2009)
Should of been better
With the joining of two great German horror legends - Andreas Schnaas and Timo Rose - you would expect the greatest film ever. However, what you do get is a movie that is just okay. And a movie where the only gore is in the last 10 minutes. And a musical number by Karl the Butcher - but that's a good thing. However, the first hour of the movie is kind of boring. Considering what the movie is, you know the fans just want gore, and it doesn't deliver till the very end. It just isn't well made or that entertaining. See it - but don't expect too much. However, Karl the Butcher vs. Axe was a definite improvement over this, and I know that these two will make many good films to come. Well, good if you like this type of thing.
Karl the Butcher vs Axe (2010)
Karl the Butcher is BACK!
The Violent Sh*t movies are amazing. I mean, they aren't GOOD, per say, but they are pretty entertaining. Andreas Schnaas has pretty much gotten better with each new film he has done, and now that Schnaas and Timo Rose have joined forces, it's a gore fan's dream. Unrated The Movie was a bit disappointing to me - but Karl the Butcher vs. Axe does not disappoint. It has all the hyper violence any fan of the genre could ask for. Though, in my opinion, not as good as Nikos the Impaler, this one comes close, and I believe to be one of Schnaas's best films to date, as well as Rose's. It's funny, ridiculous, gory, offensive, and fun. A must see for any fans of German splatter. The last 20 minutes is just pure gore. This one does not disappoint!
Freddy Got Fingered (2001)
What the heck?? Left me speechless!
The cover of this movie, makes it sound disgusting and notorious for being so. So I decided to rent it, and as I viewed it, I was left speechless. I really have no idea what I watched. I have no idea what it was supposed to be. But the sad thing is, I kind of liked it. A scene in the shower make me chuckle every time I think of it, as does a few other scenes. I mean...why would anyone make this movie? Haha. It's rude, it is crude, it's absurd, it's outrageous, it's disgusting, it's offensive, and that is why I liked it. I was almost appalled at some of the scenes in the movie, and I want to give Tom Green a high five for that, I watch the most offensive movies ever, and some of this made me say...woah. The storyline is pretty weak, but it is entertaining enough to entertain. Watch ONLY if you like offensive humor, and when I say offensive, I mean OFFENSIVE.
Dr. Chopper (2005)
I want you to meet someone...my inner *****!
HAHAHA! This film is actually REALLY funny. REALLY terrible at the same time, but you can't really say it is boring. A friend told me this was the worst film ever, and I needed to see it, so I did and only enough I kind of enjoyed it. It has some okay gore, and some really hot ladies, but the acting is bad, and the "villain," Dr. Chopper has to be the most nonthreatening villain I have ever seen. And I love why they call him Dr. Chopper...dude, he rides a motorcycle! With an obvious ending, but entertaining all throughout, this movie isn't so bad. A scene at the end when the main character frantically throws a garbage pail at the villain is the funniest. Worth a look if you are really bored and need a movie to mock.
Colonel Kill Motherfuckers (2008)
This movie is EXACTLY what a no budget horror/comedy should be. The gore is cheap, but good, the comedy is funny, the film makes good use of it's budget, and the whole film is entertaining, with not one boring second! And the use of a lollipop to kill someone is one of the most genius ideas ever! It is a must see for anyone looking for a fun, no budget horror film, and shows the viewers at home they can do this too. A reason why this movie is so awesome is because anyone can make something like it. Also, the title is catchy, there are many memorable lines and funny characters, and I know real people who are like them! This was my 3rd Hack Movie and so far it is definitely my favorite. Check this flick out, you won't be disappointed.
It's Alive (2008)
Not that bad, actually...
I love It's Alive, it is a favorite of mine. Cheesy 70's killer baby flick, you can't beat that. I am a big fan of Larry Cohen, and his older flicks, so when I heard a remake was being made I was skeptical. I thought if done right, if they went with a less cheesy approach, it could be decent, at least better than some of the other recent remakes. I wasn't sure what was going on with this film until recently I received a screener of the remake at work. I must say, I actually enjoyed it a lot more than expected. It has flaws, including a CGI killer baby this time...but overall, this film is actually a lot of fun. It isn't the spooky, realistic film it could have been, but it is a bloody good time. Though not as much fun as the original, it is a decent watch, with some decent gore. It really has no relation to the original, other than a killing baby, and the same of the family is still Davis. Overall, if you like the original, it is a decent watch, and if you haven't watched the legendary classic, watch that first, then this. I was just sad they didn't recreate the milkman scene.
Black Devil Doll (2007)
Black Devil Doll...filmed in NEGROSCOPE!
Ahh where do I begin? I had been following this movie for probably over a year, and since I first saw the hilarious looking trailer, I had put it at the top of my list with movies to see, along with Bad Biology. And I remember that the DVD was supposed to be released last year, and I was disappointed to find that they delayed the release, but I am happy because I got to experience Black Devil Doll on the big screen, in a theater, the way it should be seen. And it was more than worth the wait. Trust me. This movie is like no other film you have seen in your life, trust me. And you will never see a film like this again. And that is more than a good thing. This film is definitely not for the easily offended, not for the faint of heart, not for those who are easily grossed out, and you get the idea. Full of nudity, violence, gore, and more awesomeness, this must be the most fun I have had in a theater since I saw Poultrygeist. There are scenes that will make you scream OH MY GOD, scenes that will make you laugh your butt off, and scenes that are just plain wrong. It all adds up to one hilarious fun time. I must also add that the score from Giallos Flame is excellent, 70's style music. From the credits, I knew I was in the presence of greatness. The black devil doll is one of the most entertaining characters in film history, and will be sure to make you laugh. Whether you like the movie or not, you will be entertained. Just know what you are in for. It is sick, twisted, funny, gross, and so wrong, but oh, so right. I really wish there were more movies like this. It screams sequel!
Space Zombie Bingo!!! (1993)
My IQ lowered a few points while watching, but I laughed my butt off!!!
So, I bought the Toxie's Top 10 set, awesome set by the way, and in it was this movie. The cover is extremely misleading, showing a bunch of babes. However, this movie really has no babes, although it does have a woman named Barbie Que. That is one of the many gags in the hilarious, stupid, weird film. This movie has the worst special effects ever, however, that makes the movie all more hilarious. It doesn't take itself anywhere near seriously, it is a spoof with bad acting, terrible special effects, loaded with stock footage, and a newscaster who announces some hilarious stories. Looks like the crew must of had fun making the film as well. It doesn't make much sense, it was made for 0 budget, and it will make you feel more dumb, but there is no doubt you will laugh. See this if you want to see a GOOD, stupid spoof of sci fi movies from the 50's. And what a great title!
Better than the previous entries, but still bad
In the final of Todd Sheet's unfortunate Zombie Bloodbath Trilogy, this time the zombie outbreak hits a school. A bunch of dumb kids are in detention when it happens, and they have to fight. This one is a bit more original than the other two, and has a little more of original and better gore effects. But the acting is still bad, and you still see some of the actors who died in the original Zombie Bloodbath. Nice to see Todd Sheets is improving a little, though. Basically, if you survived the other two films, you can survive this. This one is just a little but more fun, but still awful. And chances are, if you liked the first 2, you will really enjoy this one. Watch at your own risk.