Reviews written by registered user
Movie-monkeys

10 reviews in total 
Index | Alphabetical | Chronological | Useful

0 out of 3 people found the following review useful:
monkeytastic analyze of bag of bones, 18 December 2012
2/10

Normally its not our style to review low Budget movies, but we have to get this from our chest. Probably the worst thing in the whole movie is the music. Pierce Brosnan is the only OK. actor but he seems pretty gay. The whole movie is over top. Horror movies should me thrilling and bag of bones is the boring bullsh•t. Stephen King books are great and a history of literature,nothing was good except the end credits. So do yourself a favor and do not watch this movie.

Story: 2/10

Acting: 3/10

Effect: 0/10

Action:0/10

badass factor: 0/10

0 out of 1 people found the following review useful:
monkeytastic analyze of Arkham City, 17 December 2012
10/10

After Batman Begins there was no doubt that batman was reborn. Arkham City is the perfect example for it. After seeing The Dark Knight we the Movie- Monkeys were great fans of the watchful protector;the dark knight, the silent guardian, the prince of darkness or just Batman.Without knowing whats coming we jumped right into one of the best games we ever stumbled over in all does years.The graphic is awesome,the gameply is so anticipating. STORY IN THE HEART OF !GOTHAM CITY! THUGS AND INFAMOUS SUPER-Villains. WITH THE LIVES OF INNOCENT CIVILLANS AT STAKE ONLY ONE MAN CAN SAVE THEM AND BRING JUSTICE TO THE STREETS:!BATMAN! IT is a game with the best combat we know and we always enjoy kicking some villain **s

Ted (2012)
monkeytastic analyze of Ted, 17 December 2012
6/10

It's a dream of every little boy, his beloved Teddy bear comes to life. This is no normal bear he's a pretty a**hole. A comedy well not for the whole family, but it is comedy, that sure as h*ll(why don't they let you write thi. Some scenes are bullsh*t like the last minutes, but at some scenes we laugh our **s of. The guys of family guy made a teddy bear that is perverse as hell. The story is about this piece of sh*t and a looser called John Bennett, and he had no friend and he gets a living Teddy bear. So it start very cheese. And John meets this girl,but she doesn't like Ted ,so as Ted is old an a**hole, he has to go and he doesn't like that and he gets pi**ed and that typical family drama. But the movie isn't that bad, with the right humor we started to like it

Story:5/10 Humor:10/10

Effects:4/10 laughing factor:9/10 total:28/50

Not Bad

Write commits at: movie-monkey@hotmail.com

Prometheus (2012/I)
1 out of 6 people found the following review useful:
monkeytastic analyze of Prometheus, 16 December 2012
8/10

Because this movie was taking so apart our we now will make a special review we this movie rocked. Monkeys rule

1.As in the first minute, you get demonstrated how special effects are awesome in this movie. You see that this is not a normal movie, it's an alien. Let me introduce Alien 5

2. The story is great and really gives something to think. It's not a movie were a car gets to life and needs to save the world.

2. Prometheus the ship is one of the coolest looking things ever. It looks so futuristic that I checked the Internet for hours to find a model of it.

3. Prometheus is like Alien totally Badass, with a bit of gore.

4. The creatures are stunning and terrifying.

5. The small details make it to a world, where you like to spend your time.

6. One scene i don't want to spoil but the operate scene is Badass,bloody as hell and you really can feel it.

7. It's a movie that built up to the end and the end is not disappointing at all.

8. All characters are likable and you want them to survive.

9.The last seconds are so shocking and badass. We immediately watched Alien

10. Movie-Monkeys say it's badass so watch it

Fargo (1996)
monkeytastic analyze of Fargo, 16 December 2012
8/10

Movie-gorilla vs Movie-ape Don't like it Love it

Movie-gorilla: As a great fan of No country for old men and The Big Lebowski I must say Fargo is no Coen brother masterpiece Seeing the first half of the movie it was great. The other half is Bulls**t. They just wrapped up to what the whole movie was building up to into 5 boring seconds. One thing is great:the acting.

Story: 6/10 Acting: 10/10 Effect: 5/10 Action: 3/10 Badass factor: 6/10 30/50 OK

Movie-Ape

As a great fan of No country for old men and the Big Lebovski and Fargo they all blew me out of my socks. The acting awesome. I think Frances Mcdormand didn't really deserve the Oscar, instead William H. Macy or Steve Buscemi. I love this movie, because it's dark,thrilling and funny at the same time. It is one of the best movies I have ever seen.

Story: 9/10 Acting: 10/10 Effects: 7/10 Action: 7/10 Badass factor: 9/10 Total: 42/10 Monkeytastic

0 out of 2 people found the following review useful:
monkeytastic analyze of the departed, 16 December 2012
4/10

Movie-Gorilla vs Movie-Ape Hate it Like it

Movie ape: Whats wrong with you man! I have to say I don't like Martin Scorsese that much,but The Departed is one of the best movies I have ever seen

Story:7/10 Acting: 9/10 Effects: 5/10 Action: 7/10 Badass factor: 9/10 total: 37/50 Great

Movie gorilla: I don't like to be the critic but the Departed is one piece of s**t It's like a two year old made the story and Martin Scorsese wanted to test how much Bulls**t people like. I hope you didn't like the Departed or You fell into the dumbest trap ever made by a human being. It's just not good

Story: 1/10 Effect: 0/10 Acting: 4/10 Action: 0/10 Badass factor: 1/10 Totall: 6/50 Bulls**t

2 out of 11 people found the following review useful:
monkeytastic analyise of shinning, 16 December 2012
1/10

Bullshit! Every time we hear this word we think of Shinning. We Movie-Ape and Movie-Gorilla together the Movie-Monkeys were bored to death. Movie-Ape said "I love Jack Nickolson from the Departed, but this movie sucks. Movie-Gorilla said: "It's like the Departed, its Bullshit, but the worst thing is they think their creation is good" The gernre is Horror movie, but not because of blood or gore, because it is so bad. Bullshit + Dogshit = Shinning

Story:1/10 Acting:2/10 Effects(+music)4/10 Action:1/10 Badass factor:0/10

Bullshit

monkeytastic analyise, 16 December 2012
10/10

Our review of No country for old men

Again the Coen brothers shock the world After the cinematic successes Big Lebovski and Fargo the stakes where high. But again they blew us out of our socks.

After watching Javier Bardem performance there is no doubt that he deserved an Acedemy Award. This is the dark but striking story of Llewelyn Moss (Josh Brolin), who goes on the run after being tempted by the bounty of a drug deal gone awry. A thrilling sequence of events ensues as a ruthless hit-man Anton Chigur (Javier Bardem) nand benevolent sheriff (Tommy Lee Jones) trail him in a nail-biting and suspenseful chase that will decide Moss's fate one way or another

Story:6/10 Effects:7/10 Action:9/10 Acting:10/10 Badass factor:10/10 Total:42/50 Monkeytastic

3 out of 13 people found the following review useful:
Awesome, 15 December 2012
10/10

The dark knight meets platoon. Haven't we all dreamed of it. the "gameplay" the visual effect, its bad**s. So as David mason in 2025 with advanced technology you kick some **s. Sitting in front the TV holding the controller you can't stop playing. the combat is great. Zombies are great. "multiplayer" is great. It's all "awesomeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee".If your not sure buying it?BUY IT! Black ops 2 gives exactly what the first one promises. Driving cars, flying,explosion,great story,awesome evil main villain (which is a mixture out of Heath ledgers joker and "Javier Bardem" in No country for old men and a bit of Dragovich.We also bought the care package edition and it is totally f**king worth it. Sorry I have to say it (write) it's the best most bad**s Call of Duty ever

The Cloud (2006)
2 out of 22 people found the following review useful:
this is s**t, 15 December 2012
1/10

This letter is to does who gave this movie more then 3 points. What is wrong with you! this movie is total bulls**t and thats nicely said. its like a mixture of I am legend and "caillou". We were like forced from our teacher to read this and watch it. You gotta give the movie credit for believing that their creation was likable. but its not points from ten -10 so because it needs to be 10 lines long I am going to talk about what p***ed me off. whats with the s*x scene between that "dou**ebag" "elmar" and "caillou" or known as "hannah". Its bulls**t The acting is like, well you get more in school kid theater. The best thing in the movie was the end, because it ended. Not because the ending was good. The book was bad and the movie was the worst thing I ever seen.