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Then She Found Me (2007)
This film is directed by Helen Hunt, which makes sense, as she plays the 39 year-old "love interest" of Matthew Broderick and Colin Firth. Sadly, and no offense to Ms. Hunt, but viewers would have to be on drugs to see her as 39 years-old. In the film she looks much closer to 55. I would have enjoyed the film much more if the actor had been somewhat younger looking, and a bit more attractive. It's just a bit hard to imagine Matthew Broderick and Colin Firth fighting over Helen Hunt. Also, the woman she plays isn't the most delightful person, and I applauded Broderick's character dumping her in the first few minutes of the film. Much like I was happy Tom Hank's character was stuck on an island for years in Cast Away and avoided marriage to Helen Hunt's character. Lucky bastard.
Anyway...the film is a chick-flick, and I watched it with a chick, who agreed that both the leading men would not be fighting over someone who looks like Helen Hunt, and especially not with her sour-puss, cheerless, sad-sack, basset hound attitude. Actually it's a bit of a boring film.
World's Worst Tenants (2012)
So obviously fake, it's an insult to the viewer's intelligence.
In fact, I feel stupider having even watched it. I happened across it while channel surfing, and it took me about 10 minutes to realize it's all fake. There was one "incident" where the two goatee-wearing morons had to go evict a property filled with bikers. No two guys like that would never go wander into a camp filled with bikers without backup. The biggest giveaway was, some idiot put a sheet of plywood up against a tree and had the "bikers" actors throwing a hatchet at it. Any real person playing that game would know you throw a hatchet at the tree, not a sheet of plywood. All the faces of the bikers were not blurred, and no one had any words on the backs of their jackets. Then, the idiot with the stupid haircut threw a punch and knocked down one of the bikers, and no one jumped in. No dude like that is going to punch a biker, and then all 8 other bikers are just going to stand around and watch. Bullshit. Horrible show.
OK, I'll give it a 5 rating for being mildly entertaining, when there is nothing else on...but it's just so fake.
Hidden Colors (2011)
Is this movie a joke? I thought it was a mockumentary!
I am interested in black history, so rented this "documentary" because I thought I might learn something. What happened was, it turned into a comedy! To sum up the entire film; Africans invented everything from the wheel to space travel, and white people (and the Catholic Church) have buried and suppressed all this to "keep the black people down".
I had it on when some friends were over, and some of the statements are so absurd and ludicrous, we were laughing out loud.
According to some of the "historians" in this film: The Buddha was African (because they interpret the statues with the thick lips and "nappy hair" as being so. Now THAT'S proof! Even though he is known to have been an Indian man named Siddhārtha Gautama, they don't talk about this.
The Japanese are actually Africans who had sex with Korean people (because in ancient paintings, the figures are painted in dark pigments).
The Africans are the basis for all Asian people and culture.
On and on and on. We were all laughing out loud at this point.
Basically, the film is nonsense and it's purpose seems to be to simply make people of African descent feel good about themselves as a race. This movie is so ridiculous that is seems like something produced by Saturday Night Live. Something from the movie "Undercover Brother", that Conspiracy Brother would watch.
Anything European people have done is history was stolen from Africans, or Africans did it first. Greece, Rome, England, all that culture and discoveries.....stolen from the African.
Forget that "myth" that Arabians invented Algebra. Nope. It was an African. (Algebra was invented by the Muslim mathematician Al-Khwarizmi in the book he wrote in 820. Algebra is the Arabic word (aljabr) for "equation". Some people say Babylonians invented it, too.) The production value is crap, some of the interviews are horribly recorded, you can hear the echo in the room they are in. Most of the people are smug and act like "How can you not know this? Are you stupid?" This page seems to be filled with paid reviews, or reviews written by friends or family members, and all of them should be reported to IMDb.
The Tommy Chong Roast (1989)
A roast is where you make fun of the person being roasted. This is a bunch of comics getting up and doing their comedy club routine. Sure, there are a few jabs at Chong, but they aren't even funny. He should have gone on Howard Stern and got a proper roast.
The little act by Bill Saluga is terrible, the guy comes out and does his ancient "you can call me Cheech, you can call me Chong..." blah blah blah which goes on too long and slowly dies and is pushed offstage.
I think the reason this sucks so much is Hugh Hefner "produced" it. Leave the roasts to the professionals, Mr. Hefner. Let the Friar's do it next time. I mean, it is more of a Playboy thing, with a giant bunny logo right behind the podium (instead of a picture or caricature of Chong, for example).
You can usually download this from a Peer-2-Peer site, don't bother buying it. I saw it on VHS, don't think they would bother releasing it on DVD.
Unang tikim (2006)
One of the worst movies I've ever seen
This isn't even a real movie, it is more "soft-porn". The story is, a girl lives alone in the Philippines and works as a prostitute. Many of the male villagers in the area want to have sex with her or have crushes on her, and most of them barge their way into her house and assault her, where, after 30 seconds of terrible acting, she gives in and has sex. The sex scenes, which rarely show anything other than her breasts, are painful to watch, as the scenes are long and the camera rarely moves! Also, both actors barely move much, perhaps to get by the censors. The movie doesn't really have a story, it is just the girl screwing different guys! I recommend this movie to be a future "cult-classic" film!
Der Tunnel (2001)
Great Movie, much better than I thought it would be!
This turned out to be a great movie, much better than I thought it would be. I am a fan of the spy movies of the 1960's, and this movie fits into that genre (but not quite). I am a fan of the cold war era, too, with Berlin and the wall and all that, so this movie was great to watch. There are a few things I didn't like, but they were minor, which is why I gave it an 8 out of 10.
I was watching this with a buddy, and we both got caught up in it and were on the edge of our seats wondering if they would get away with it, and was much more thrilling that I thought it would be.
There are several very touching scenes where people get shot, and people are looking over the wall, reaching down, trying to grab their hand and pull them up, while the shot man is gasping, whispering how he had to get over the wall before he lost his girlfriend...it was very freaking' sad and moving, especially the way the filmed it, very cool.
It gets slow a few times, dabbling in the romance between two characters, but I am used to that in movies now. The version I saw was in German with English subtitles, but luckily I speak German. I thought the main character was very like Bruce Willis.
You have have to be an "idiot" to enjoy "Idiocracy"
As much as I want to love this movie, as long as I have waited for it's release since I heard about it, and as much as I loved "Office Space" and "King of the Hill" and all things Judge, I couldn't. I overlooked many stupid things in the movie, but finally have to admit that this movie is a piece of crap. I thought maybe Fox wouldn't release it because it makes fun of them and many other corporations, but now I see how it really is: The movie simply sucked.
They want us to believe that the future society of the USA is so dumb that they don't know how to water their crops with water and not sports drink, YET we see airplanes, monster trucks (500 years in the future and we still have monster trucks with combustion engines?), television, guns, cars, subways, video cameras, etc. Yet they don't know plants need water?
Sorry, but the basic premise of the movie is that humans are so dumb we are starving, yet many of the other basic things in life are still around and working, so that ruins it right there. There was way too much for me to overlook, as in: The main characters are in two hibernation units that are unplugged and thrown in a dump for 500 years, yet...with no power, no food, nothing...they both survive and walk away as if from a nice sleep. Money is still somehow being printed, television is still being broadcast, movie are still being filmed....all 500 years in the future...
The acting was terrible and overblown, and despite several funny gags, I couldn't wait for the movie to be over. I am glad I only rented it on Netflix and not in the theater, as it was cheaper. This is probably the disappointment of the year for me. Maybe Judge is being ironic; the kind of people who enjoyed this film probably didn't realize it was about them.
Honkytonk Man (1982)
Decent story, but not very authentic in details
This movie has an okay story, a bit in the road-trip theme, and Eastwood's son, Kyle, is an okay actor, but the other actors don't impress me much. Eastwood didn't seem to care much about making the movie an authentic "period piece", and you will often see details in the background from modern times, as well as the haircuts, which are obviously from the early 80's. Several times he shows musicians and they seemed to put the least amount of effort into looking authentic. At the Grand 'Ol Opry, the female singer who is on after Eastwood is singing in a modern style, and anyone who listens to music from the 1930's knows that doesn't fit. Even the music the bands are playing has a 70's/80's sound to it. Maybe they should have got T-Bone Burnett as musical director! They could have had a band on in the vein of the Carter Family, instead. I guess they had a limited budget and it shows, but it could have been a much better movie than it turned out to be. Other things I noticed were, the cement curbs in the really luxurious looking cemetery in the film with all the green grass and trees...excuse me, this is in the 1930's, and as far as I can tell, most graveyards didn't look that maintained, as there was little money. Little things like that that kind of ruin the illusion of a rough period in the US. Even the cars sitting outside the Ryman Theater are highly polished and obviously collector pieces rented for the film and the owners didn't want to get any dust on them. With all the detail Eastwood put into his later masterpiece films, I am a little disappointed, but it is still a decent movie, I gave it a 6 out of 10.
Grizzly Man (2005)
Treadwell was obviously disturbed
I feel that this film doesn't look very deep into the theory that Treadwell is obviously mentally disturbed, and I don't mean "mad at the world". Seeing a 40+ year old man prance about in the woods crying about the death of a baby box, and almost weeping at the sight of a dead bumblebee on a flower is embarrassing. Treadwell talks to the camera as if his audience is a group of 5 year-olds; "Wow, that was a big bear, a big bear, such a very big bear!" It is almost like watching a Saturday Night Live "daily affirmation" sketch with Stewart Smalley, the sappy, weepy, touchey-feely guy. Never in my life have I seen a grown man weeping over the corpse of a baby fox or a dead bug. In my opinion the guy was a fruitcake. And this is coming from a liberal.
Yes, I am a liberal naturalist, but I had to cringe seeing Treadwell cuddle-up in his tent with a teddy-bear, talking to bears as if they were 5-year olds "Oh Hellwo there Mr. Chocowate, how are you today?" I can just hear all the Conservative red-neck types turning Treadwell into a poster child for the whole ecology movement, them envisioning us liberal's as a bunch of weepy crybabies who want to run around naked with bears and foxes and everybody living in harmony.
And the film also didn't look very much into Treawell being a homosexual, which anyone with any sense could see. He even states he wishes he were gay. Maybe he liked living in the wild with the bears because he would not be judged? The footage was great, and I could see Treadwell had good intentions, but he was obviously mentally disturbed, and his friends in the film also seem to be a bit loony. And I lived in San Francisco for 10 years and have seen it all, but these people are even crazy by SF standards. Like I said, several times it seemed as if I was watching a Mocumentary like "Best in Show". Some of the characters were so strange, especially the coroner.
Der Untergang (2004)
One of the Best Movies I've Ever Watched
Seriously, I wasn't expecting much, but this was one of the best movies period. The actors and acting was terrific, the sets were incredible (St. Petersburg, Russia), the emotions... I felt like I was in Berlin during the last few days, I felt like I was in the bunker with Hitler. It is the most realistic depiction of the situation I had ever seen, and I almost felt a tear in my eye. And that is something, coming from a 40 year old Army veteran. The last 5 minutes, I was on the edge of my seat, when the Russians showed up. Anyway, this movie is totally recommended by me, but brush up on your Nazi history first, or you won't know who is who.
I also liked it because it showed Hitler as a real human, and not the usual Anthony Hopkins/Alec Guiness "nutbag" Hitler, or the stereotypical "demon" Hitler. It showed him as he was, a broken down egomaniac. I will totally buy this movie and add it to my collection, which is rare for me to do these days.