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swlit2001

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5 reviews in total 
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12 out of 29 people found the following review useful:
Awful., 16 July 2008
1/10

The second film in the ST series was nicely made little claustrophobic sci fi horror. CG was great for the budget level, as was the art direction, acting and wardrobe. A well made, well written little film. Marauder looks cheap. Terrible CG, uniforms that don't fit, bad green screen, obviously tiny sets. The writing is terrible. I want Edward Neumeier's agent! The only redeeming qualities are Jolene Blalock and Casper Van Dien who both deserve so much better. Why did Neumeier cast so Van Dien looks tiny in some of his best scenes? Van Dien gives a nice performance and Blalock is beautiful and likable even in a role without depth or sense. The bugs look terrible, too. Re-hire the guys who made 2 for 4, even if you have to pay them what they deserve!

BloodRayne (2005)
3 out of 6 people found the following review useful:
This movie is so bad., 18 April 2006
1/10

According to director Uwe Boll it was cheaper to hire real prostitutes than actresses.

Apparently it was also cheaper to hire Uwe Boll than a real director. But it's not only his fault. A surprisingly terrible script by Guinevere Turner, bad art direction and costumes, a weak edit. . . This movie is so bad you even wonder why Billy Zane would be in it, let alone Michelle Rodriguez, Michael Madsen and Ben Kingsley. I'd really like to talk to the people who produced this stinker. I bet they made money on it somehow and if so, that would be the most creative aspect of this unwatchable garbage.

Fear of Clowns (2004) (V)
1 out of 8 people found the following review useful:
Mediocre by-the-numbers low budget horror feature. . . but I'll rent the sequel., 8 March 2006
4/10

Others have written about the problems of FOC so I won't rehash. Here's what I liked. . .

The camera work is uneven but some of it is very nice. The clown's makeup is fantastic. Although I found myself confused at times by plot twists that seemed part of a larger story that was never revealed, Kevin Kangas (the writer and director) knows the genre and takes care of business. I would not say FOC is an artful or even especially fun film, but it is generally competent. I expect Kangas to go on to make better films and I look forward to seeing them. For me, the one real standout in the film is the actor who plays Detective Peters, Frank Lama. Lama has the look of a 1940s noir detective and gives a strong performance as the insomniac cop who tracks down the murderous clown. The script doesn't give Lama much to work with but he exudes the kind of studio movie or network television presence you rarely see in indies. According to IMDb he is in another horror film called Swarm of the Snakehead which also stars Gunnar Hansen from Texas Chain Saw Massacre! I'm really looking forward to that one.

The Wickeds (2005) (V)
1 out of 3 people found the following review useful:
Sadly, this movie is unwatchable., 22 July 2005
3/10

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

I wanted to like this film but. . .

Positive: It is for the most part well-lit. Some nice camera work. Some of the CG is slick, especially for a no-budget mini-DV zombie film.

Negative: Terrible script! Adequate to poor acting, bad art direction, inconsistent audio.

*SPOILER* The Wickeds is incredibly boring but also just dumb. I turned it off when the vampire (the first corpse that wakes up is a vampire, right?) magically appears in the house for the sole purpose of performing oral sex on a young woman wearing panties. Maybe they did things differently back in his day?

62 out of 124 people found the following review useful:
Silly Show, 6 January 2005

The single reason to watch is Jessica Alba. The premise is fine, but the execution is terrible. Consistently poor writing and an absurd structure (does anyone else find the "Jam Pony" scenes strangely reminiscent of Taxi?) make this almost unwatchable. "Eyes Only" is completely ridiculous -- Logan is the ONLY guy that can hack the cable system but no one in this future can trace the hack or identify him even though the broadcasts feature his unaltered voice and a clear view of his retinas? Max's friends seem like they should be in some horrible sitcom, not a sci-fi action show. Actually, it may be that Dark Angel is entirely ironic, in which case it's still bad but at least perversely interesting.

If you want to watch a well-written sci-fi series that was cancelled, check out Firefly.