Reviews written by registered user
jcs_stanley

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20 reviews in total 
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Prometheus (2012/I)
3 out of 10 people found the following review useful:
The equivalent of mixing " Alien" with "Avatar"., 2 June 2012
8/10

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

In all my life I have never seen something so awe-inspiring yet terrifying, Prometheus is that very thing I'm describing to you! Before watching this I had never seen the original "Alien" nor do I plan to. Instead I looked up. I studied it, dissected it, learnt it's inner most works to prepare me for what Prometheus has to deliver.

So does Ridely Scotts's long anticipated that's sorta prequel to Alien but isn't pay-off??? The answer it happens is yes. Not only does it deliver with incredible visuals and technology almost on-par with what James Cameron has made for his vision of the future, Prometheus provides a genuine sense of fear and tensity to itself especially mid-way with some pretty nasty alien attack and a Caserian scene that wouldn't be allowed on "One born every minute" even if it were re-cut multiple times, Quarintend , Disinfected and given a lollipop afterwards.

And Speaking of Re-cutting, I actually glad "Prometheus" wasn't butchered and forced to line a life of "12A" because any cuts would have severely water-down the force and and energy of the film and What Scott was trying to achieve. While the likes of "The Hunger Games" and "Hot fuzz" are excellent in their own violent rights, their Gashing is almost wussy-like compared to Promethues because Scott is crazy and brave enough goes to places of stomach that most wouldn't consider.

The Acting in the film was amazing and well thought out, the ones that stand out the most for me are Noomi Rapace's Liz Shaw and Michael Fassbender's David. I swear to god if Fassbender isn't nominated for the award for "Best Actor" at the BAFTAs along with Mark Ruffalo (The Hulk), critics will have me to deal with, He deserves a big fat golden face for him to take home.

In conclusion that the film has best cliff-hanger ending period. If you've watched "Alien" before it'll knock yer socks off.

2 out of 5 people found the following review useful:
The Box-Office shall be Hulk-Smashed..., 28 April 2012
10/10

GRAAAAH! Oh my god. The sheer power of this film, how it is able to pull of one big magic trick and somehow cram everything in without coming off as a bloated or lazy being that lives off a diet of eye-candy and Clichés. No. Absolutely No! The avengers takes the harder but more fulfilling route making it more of a god like the mighty Thor, and god that deserves attention and respect for all mankind.

I have personally seen this film twice and not once has it's quality withed with each viewing. It has genuine sense of epicness and suspense that almost makes you think everything will be all right in the end, Meance provided by Loki resonates perfectly, in fact in one of his scenes I felt my heart rate going up! literally. If you only know a bit about the film before seeing it, ;et me tell you he does things that you'd didn't expect which only adds to it all. The visual splendor is huge and with the acting coupled with it believable. The fight sequences can be narrowed down to three things: Tesserect theft, Hellicarrier attack and NY final showdown. It makes you stay on for the ride, it makes wish it could have gone on. Even my family found themselves in joyful hysterics at the end of it!

11 out of 22 people found the following review useful:
Makes other aardman movies look like complete pants!, 6 April 2012
10/10

In my eyes even the mighty "Wallace and Gromit" and all those Gothic stop-moes from Burton and what have you are just a single inch away from what "The Pirates" has been able to accomplish.

It's just an imaginative comic thrill-ride from start to finish. Obviously it won't be as thrilling as let say umm... a Marvel or Transformer film but still thrilling on a family level. What amazes me is the kind of boundaries that have been pushed since "Curse of the Were-Rabbit" not just in visuals but also in tone. The overall film contains mild swearing, a little more risqué elements than what W+G Would normally allow and a several wacky Historic Anachronisms which help the daft and buffoonish tone of the film move smoothly along the seven seas out to go try a plunder the box-office if it can get passed the healthy competition e.g. The deadly, all money consuming "Hunger Games" sea monster for example (I enjoyed that too).

Of course underneath all that tomfoolery and cut-throatiness a warm and eager heart beats underneath the beard providing us with the same care and emotional connection with the characters who by the way are one of the most well put together and recognisable of animated casts I've ever witnessed since "Kung fu Panda". Hugh Gant makes a terrific, bumbling Pirate Captain whose performance is held up high by the Portrayers of his crew (Particularly that of Martain Freeman and the rest of them) Even supporter Charles Darwin (David Tennet) gets his fair share of scenes. And I'll salute anyone who sneaks the Elephant man into an animated movie. Who says it's just for kids?! Not me!

1 out of 1 people found the following review useful:
Visually thrilling and well realised., 18 March 2012
8/10

John carter has got to be one of the visual spectacles of 2012, with much of it's combat scenes being reminiscent of Star Wars (a franchise that came long after the original "Barsoom" series was first published) However John Carter is a able to to such scenes in it's own unique way so that though they resemble what Lucas did later in the 70s, it creates creatures, Cultures and Airships that only the people of Mars could have dreamed off from hulking White Apes to an imaginative mash-up of Traditional bladed weaponry of the ancient past and Sci-fi technologies.

The film takes a while to get going (Such as the firsts scenes with Carter on earth) but once he gets to Mars I can assure you you will regret nothing because the Filmprovides us with a more fascinating mythos than Avatar's.

The plot is decent to an extent but is pushed along effortlessly by the amount of talent that's involved in the performances regardless of whenever it's a savage Thark or Taylor KItsch as He-man (I therefore look forward to seeing him in "Battleship" when it finally hits land) Did I mention that Edgar Rice Burroghs himself his more or less involved in the beginning and end of the story. I wont say any more for fear of spoilers but I will say it is all really interesting that he appears in the film himself even though the "The Raven" has done similar thing this year.

1 out of 4 people found the following review useful:
One of the funniest films of the year!, 17 February 2012
10/10

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

This film is quite literally a Joy to be hold. It shows what felt things are capable of, It's quality makes it worthy of being among those being entered into Next year's baftas. It has this timeless quality to it in that many of the things the Muppets do for entertainment never seem wear and tear at the felt seams over time, It's one of the advantages of being Hand-made and not hand-drawn.

It's Hard for any one to hate the antics of Kermit and pals, even the most cynical and fun-hating of people pone to getting annoyed will find themselves succumbing to awesome power of an Aforementioned frog's banjo and a bear's bad jokes that are constant targets for heckling. Even the sunny and colourful songs avoid entering sickly-sweet Saccherine town because in the Muppet franchise no age or demographic gets left behind.

The Muppets did what J.J Abrams did for Star Trek in that it took an age old franchise and pumped wholley good energy back into it ready in time for it to delight a new generation of HensonWorshipers with Gags, Clebraties and laughter galore!

Chronicle (2012)
1 out of 2 people found the following review useful:
Shaky cam does Awesome tekinis that makes this worth the watch., 16 February 2012
7/10

Chronicles is sort of like the rouge super child of "Cloverfeild" and "Blair Whitch" in that it goes in a direction no other found footage film has gone before, In that it actually has a plot of some sort even though it is told in the same format as it's monster-mash father. One camera. Zero Music and Mold-breaking visuals.

In fact when I say Mold-breaking the visual effects in Chronicles go beyond the very word. "Splitting the very fabric of the universe" is what it should be used to describe the divine powers of this film and I don't mean the Telekenetic ones our 3 characters gain in the story, I mean that kind of CG (That's come a long way since Cloverfeild) that used to make said abilities come to life and seem so real to the point they make the Force in Star Wars look old-hat and dysfunctional (Not that the force is).

The film is Essentially a visualisation of the whole "With great power comes great responsibility" thing used my Spider-man in marvel in that it shows the three focuses of the picture initially messing around with their abilities in broad daylight before an accident convinces them to try take better care of them. It also shows the corruption of said powers depending on the users's Exsitance. Secpifically the film explores the creation of a supervillan in how they are eventually driven to use their powers for Greedy or down-right mental purposes based on how difficult their life was before which involve a lot of pain, wrecking stuff and causing general anarchy. If you watch the whole film you'll know which of the two out of the three characters sides with the either the Light and Dark side Respectively.

Although they don't technically have superhero/Supervillan names in the film cause they don't need to. I would have personally called the hero "Tellikit" and the Villain "Apexus". You'll know why I gave those characters those names if you watch the film. I wouldn't call it a masterpiece but never-the-less Chronicles offers a new, Exiting and Interesting take on a film in a strange yet popular genre that offers up hints of a sequel.

"Mongrels" (2010)
5 out of 6 people found the following review useful:
BBC 3... Bring.This.Show.Back., 18 January 2012
10/10

Mongrels is perhaps one of the funniest TV shows that I have seen in a long time. It's just big furry comedy ride of a lifetime from beginning to end. It also pushes the boundaries of comedy even further.The one who gets the notice would have to be the badly behaved and dirty-mouthed Vince with his constant spouting of the C word and territorial behaviour. The show also has this unique mixture of American and British humour which means any English speaker from different parts of the world can enjoy.

In Case your wondering why The summary is in big caps then I'll tell you why... the show has been AXED! Shocking I know, when I first saw the news that it been given the "big sleep" I felt lie half the comedy universe had collapsed in on itself. Why would BBC 3 cancel such a wonderful show like Mongrels?? I know it'll never be big as the Inbetweeners but still In my eyes it still had a way to go. BBC 3 should have given this show several more series! I was hoping it would go into series 4!

That's the problem with network at the moment, their constantly deleting shows like they'e lost the will to keep going. This was the same network that murdered Dr who confidental. Think about that avid Time lord fans!

Hopefully this review will get across to any Mongrels fans out their so that they may launch a campaign of outcry to force the BBC to bring this show back regardless of what they say about the ratings!

If Vince heard what they have done to the show he would have been like: "oh you cheeky little ****s." cue bloodshed in the BBC office.

Funny though slightly Bankoked up., 15 January 2012
7/10

Essentially the overall film basically just follows the same format that the original had but this time the ever raunchy Chaos is erupting in Bangkok, Thiland with even more Crudness, Frontal-nudity and scenes that will either offend or amuse you. New additions to this crazy sequel include a Monkey who smokes and deals drugs for bananas, Lady-boys (eep), A cut off finger and Stu getting a tattoo Fused onto his skin! When you watch the film you quickly realise that this no ordinary Rehash. It's actually one that offers a lot more Adultness that even the likes of South Park or Family Guy could ever dream of.

Being much bigger, The Sequel tends to veer into much darker black-hole content and comedy than the first, But still retains the Madness and hi-cap Hiluarity that helped the original make a name for itself. This sequel will either overall feel like a demented scientific clone Of The first one or The original Upgraded into into something even bigger depending on how you feel. I reckon it will probably feel like both.

3 out of 4 people found the following review useful:
Chaotic, stupid ,but very funny, 14 January 2012
10/10

Nothing more then a deranged completely unashamed thrill ride of laughs, This film delights itself in mocking, teasing and outright twisting things that would normally be frowned upon if they were ever committed in real life.

Showing a fairly accurate portrayal of how things can get out of control in Vegas, The film follows the exploits of Phil, Stu and Alan. Three guys who one day go out on a stag-night to the city of sin itself before a wedding with Groom-to-be Doug who goes missing the following day next morning leading to the three trying to piece together the events of what exactly happened during that crazy last night in which they were all tipsy and out of their minds.

Characters swear like sailors, Propert is broken and smashed, Danger is made a complete laughing stock, all put together to form one anacarhic and funny comedies. I especially laughed at the "pretending to ***k a tiger scene. With the amount of raunchy jokes and a scene of full frontal male nudity, This is definitely not one for the kids or grandparents.

3 out of 6 people found the following review useful:
The Greatest Christmas film of all time!, 23 December 2011
10/10

This film is perhaps the best thing to have come out of Aardman since Wallace and Gromit. It might not be in the Legendray stop-motion category the duo are know for, 'Arthur Christmas's Computer Animation was just as well blending a well assembled cast British actors with A mixture of British and American humour effortlessly they virtually all demographics can enjoy without being offencive.

Best of all it Goes to places NO Christmas film has ever gone before. Not only does it contain an original Idea that does not involve Santa getting Amesia! (A child is missed which means our Titualar hero must put things right) Cue a crazy, MANIC and entertaining Slegih-trip that ranges from Lion attacks to Supposed Alien Invasion! And yes it also has a sentimental heart which is core to most Festive big-screen eye candy.

Arthur Christmas is film that ditches any Saccharine, syrupy junk that seems to plague some Christmas entertainment today and instead brings in something new, fresh, TIMELESS, cool and above all chaotic and jolly. And for that I'd like to bless the following groups with Christmas Cheer:

1. Jesus 2.Santa. 3. The guys and women at Aardman and Sony 4. Those that are less fortunate. 5. The leaders of the U.S and U.K 6. My family. 7. And most importantly this MOVIE!!

MERRY Christmas! (have a happy new year IMDb)


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