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David and Goliath (2015)
Could have been shot better by high schoolers.
Without any possible doubt the single worst biblical movie I have ever had the misfortune to watch. The acting for want of a better term was diabolical, the cinematography again for the want of a better term was on a par with that of parents shooting their kids school play on a VHS camcorder (although the acting would doubtless be better), the sound recording at its best points was muffled and at its worst sounded like it had been done with a microphone at the bottom of a metal bucket on a 1970's cassette recorder.
I accept I will never get back the half hour of my life I managed to force myself to sit through this travesty in the hope that it might get better but I sincerely wish there were a way I could at least UN-watch it.
The ONLY ways I can imagine anyone could possibly give this rubbish a good review are either:- 1. they were in it themselves. 2. They know someone who was in it and want to promote it on their behalf. (if you are one of these people do your friend a favour, let this movie disappear into the oblivion it deserves, the same goes for those who were in it) 3. They are so deeply indoctrinated into their faith that they are unable to accept that anything to do with it could possibly be bad. 4. They have been paid. or 5. They have never before seen any kind of movie and were just blown away by moving pictures that can talk (even if you can't actually hear what they are saying a lot of the time).
I actually felt embarrassed for everyone involved in this movie, I felt embarrassed for the actors (I use that word very liberally here), the director, the producers, all of the crew, the animals, the guys who made the cameras lights and sound gear and the guys who sold them to whoever shot it; it was so bad those responsible should get down on their knees and apologise to the very locations and equipment for involving them in the making of something so thoroughly awful.
I only hope that none of those involved relied on the skills demonstrated in this movie to keep them from homelessness and starvation and that having got it out of their system were able to go back into society, perhaps with the help of some counselling they will one day be able to forget.