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The Goonies (1985)
I don't get it...
What is entertaining about this? I fail to understand what is so great about it. I am 13, I should be the target audience. I saw this movie during a kids film camp, and everybody thought it was so hilarious that.. what? Is it funny that a fat kid jiggles his fat and that there are kids cussing and whining. What really shocks me is that the kids in the camp loved this and hated "Spirited Away". IS MY GENERATION THAT STUPID?! I'm going to analyze this film a little further to prove my point, though:
ACTING: The actors themselves aren't awful, although they become so annoying at times, you kind of wanted them to die. The one playing the kid with asthma was not captivating at all. He was bland and never showed any real emotion. The others weren't bad, and they probably did the best with the script they were given, which lead to my next point...
SCRIPT: Oh yeah, this is where the movie gets awful. The script is just all around unoriginal. In 4th grade,(before I saw this film), I would write adventure stories that were at the same level of this. These stories I wrote were all, honestly: There's a group of kids they go on an adventure underground involving many obstacles like:balance beams, swinging axes, etc. they find treasure, then get out and return to normal life. Sound familiar? I mean, nothing original or interesting happens. I guess you could argue that the piano scene was O.K., but even that wasn't fantastic. The characters were beyond shallow, all bogged down to just stupid quirks. They have no depth and just come off as whiny. Don't believe me? Well, how much development do they have besides fat kid-wimpy, loves food,lies Asian kid-invents things main character- asthma, whispers teenage boy- works out other kid- tries to be cool, but is annoying. YOU NEED TO DEVELOP! but the one element of the movie that really pisses me off is the deformed brother that the villains were keeping in their basement. The fact that they could stoop that low to produce comedy is just horrendous. And what was funny about him? Was it funny that he couldn't talk properly and communicated through yelling? Was it funny that he was wearing a superman shirt? No, it's actually kind of sad, and I'm surprised a lot more people don't hate this movie for exploiting people born with physical deformities like that. They deserve as much respect as people, and this just cruelly makes fun of them.
EFFECTS: The main reason I gave this film such a high rating is because the effects were really great. It wasn't beautiful, it was all very brown and gray, but I guess that isn't awful. That was at least pleasing to look at.
Well, this is getting pretty long, so I think I'm going to stop. To summarize; while the special effects were great, that doesn't make up for undeveloped characters, a plain, boring script and just O.K. acting. I really, REALLY hate it, but if this is what appeals to you in a film,and it appeals to a lot of people, then just keep enjoying it. Just, don't ask to me to watch it with you.