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Buffy The "Dummy" slayer?..., 10 April 2014
8/10

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

When Buffy, Xander, and Willow are caught by the new principle by making fun of the talent auditions, he forces the three of them to audition themselves. They happen to encounter a talented but very peculiar ventriloquist (The paring of Morgan (Human) & Sid (Dummy) People are getting killed off one by one with their hearts being removed. Morgan is the prime suspect, but Buffy is more frightened by the Dummy. With the school shrouded in mystery over the killer, Buffy will have to get over her phobia of dummies to solve this mystery and keep the school safe

This episode is extremely creepy! I might raise some eyebrows by saying this, but Sid makes Chucky look like a walk in the park in comparison. That dummy gave me the willies in many ways. Joss Whedon knows this and takes every opportunity to pray on these fears. Wait until you see the shot of the dummy leering in the window while Buffy sleeps! There is another suspenseful scene where the dummy stares at Buffy in class. The amazing score really adds to the atmosphere in this one. It's one of the best scores I've heard since the original Halloween movie. That may be an exaggeration to some, but to me it isn't. What was cool about this episode is how vulnerable and fragile Buffy is here. She always has moments of vulnerability, but I truly felt the fear from her in this one. Not only was it great psychology but good storytelling as well. I give major credit to Sarah Michelle Gellar for giving such a great performance. It also benefits from some sly humor at times. I did feel the conclusion was a tad disappointing after some amazing buildup, but I do give it credit it for being rather unconventional at the same time. I just felt a better ending was needed after some terrific storytelling for 30 minutes or so.

Buffy fans should love this episode. Some may be disappointed at the lack of Vampire action, but this is a great mystery that is filled with some wonderful psychology. I don't know about everybody else, but I sure got the creeps from this one. I have but one request, now... I never want to hear Charisma Carpenter sing again as long as I live!

P.S. Stay for the end credits! I believe this was the first time in this series at this juncture for something to happen in the end credits

8.5/10

Legendary (2013)
0 out of 1 people found the following review useful:
Don't be fooled by the cast, 10 April 2014
2/10

(Credit IMDb) Travis and his team travel to China in search of what isn't supposed to exist ... their mission to capture a Cryptid which is wreaking havoc in a remote village and they need to do this before it is killed by Harker, the legendary bounty hunter.

Dolph Lundgren is one of my favorite action stars from the 80's, and Scott Adkins has set the standard for burgeoning stars as far as action stars go. How could you possibly go wrong with those two? It turns out a lot. Those expecting a movie filled with action will be highly disappointed. In lieu of action, we get an excruciatingly boring adventure film that features very little to no excitement. It has some really lame CGI with animals and it doesn't take advantage of the martial art skills that both Lundgren and Adkins have. It's way too talky and sleep inducing to make much of an impact. The only good thing about this movie is the cinematography.

2/10

I don't see how any true Scooby fans could dislike this one, 10 April 2014
8/10

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

Bored of the "phony" villains they always capture, the gang is looking for something real and invigorating to solve. Daphne is especially bored of doing the same thing all the time and they wind up splitting. The gang reunites on Moonscar island, when real ghosts are promised by two mysterious women. This movie is the perfect example of having the best of both worlds. It keeps the traditions alive, but adds in innovative stuff as well. It's not afraid to do things differently and I appreciated that. Unlike Scooby Doo the movie, the split-up stunt works in this one. As fun as it is to see the gang capture villains and unmask the culprits, I do appreciate originality. For a cartoon movie, this is actually somewhat creepy. I don't recommend this to kids, they will probably be terrified. The zombies are impressive for a cartoon, as is the overall atmosphere. It was nice to see something real for a change. The Bayou was the perfect setting for this movie. It has some great gags, mainly from Scooby and Shaggy. Wait until you see their gags with the Louisiana peppers. I cracked up pretty hard at it. Scooby's obsession with cats is a lot of fun as well. The mystery unravels in a way you wouldn't expect at the end. It throws in a decent twist at the end, and it's rather creepy as well.

I enjoyed this thoroughly. I wouldn't recommend this to your kids, but anyone else will love this. It has everything you love about Scooby Doo, including new tricks up its sleeve. If you can find it, pick it up!

8/10

Not as bad as its reputation, but definitely a "F" you to Freddy's legacy, 10 April 2014
5/10

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

I own this movie because I love this series.. Mediocre or not, I've seen all of them countless times, this one included. I don't consider this movie to be the atrocity that many say it is, but it certainly is a major disappointment in every way. They had the potential to give Freddy a major send-off that people would never forget. I've never understood why they didn't bring back Alice (Lisa Wilcox) from parts 4/5. She had a son named Jacob in the fifth movie, why not continue that storyline? This could have been the send-off Freddy fans deserved, but Rachel Talalay made sure that didn't happen. She is a big part of the problem. She has a lack of experience and it shows. Like the 4th and 5th sequel, this movie fails to find the proper medium between comedy and horror. This series was beginning to wear out its welcome at this juncture and a proper follow-up would have been ideal. This was not only an insult to Freddy's legacy, but the fans as well. How could you show so much contempt from such a die-hard fan base? As much as I love Robert Englund, he started getting bigger than the movie themselves in the 3rd movie. As a result, the quality went down and the character development was nowhere near as strong. They got into the bad habit of having a penchant to make money with little effort as possible. You want an example? There is a dream scene with Spencer (Breckin Meyer) , where Freddy plays video games (What do you know? Beat my high score! I have to admit I love that line) The point is that this sort of thing doesn't belong in a Nightmare on Elm Street movie. The storyline of "Who is Freddy's kid" had all the potential in the world to be something special, but it was done in a half-assed way. They try to be clever by pulling a stunt from Psycho with the lead male character, but it wound up hurting the movie more than anything else. The gore is average. we get self-lacerations, a cut off ear, but the highlights are an impaling on spikes and a body exploding in half.

We get the same desecrated house that started in Nightmare on Elm Street III: Dream Warriors, but you're telling me you couldn't get the original house back? This was supposed to be the final chapter, laziness is not acceptable. I can't forget the lame 3D at the end either. Trust me. The 3D glasses don't make much of a difference. The acting ranges from solid to mediocre. Lisa Zane is somewhat wooden as the heroine. She goes from an afterthought to the main character in the second half and I didn't buy it. It was shoddily written. Another dimension to her character would have been nice. She had too many "off" moments for my liking. Believe it or not, her storyline had potential as well. It all ended very anti-climatically and half-baked. Robert Englund is fun as usual, but far too comedic at times. His one-liners are awful in this one. ('I'll get you my pretty and your little soul, too!") ("Nice hearing from you Carlos!") I love Freddy when he's funny, but not completely funny. A balance of both is essential. He is human in this film at times as well. That's another storyline they failed to capitalize on. Shon Greenblat is decent as John Doe, but we don't know enough about him. It would have been nice to know where he came from and who he was. Lezlie Deane is one of the most annoying horror characters I have ever seen. It's not her fault, just the way she is written. Her abrasive character does her no favors, nor does her "Karate" shtick either. How the hell did she get to survive? Her phony tough act grated my nerves a LOT. Breckin Meyer is fun as a stoner, while Rickey Dean Logan is solid as Carlos. Yaphett Kotto's role is completely out-of-place in this movie. He felt painfully awkward as the Doc. We get some horrible cameos from Alice Cooper, Rosanne & Tom Arnold. I did enjoy Johnny Depp's cameo though.

It's a sad day when Freddy is defeated by Ninja stars and other lame weapons. I don't hate this movie, but it angers me at the same time. When it comes to "final chapters" you should do everything possible to reward your loyal fans. They failed to do that in this movie. There were a few story lines that had the ability to be riveting, but it failed in all of them. This sequel can be brainless entertainment if you turn your brain off, but it's not a good movie. After all the trouble of promoting this as Freddy's last hurrah, Freddy got the send off he deserved with "New Nightmare" As much as I enjoy it, I don't count Freddy Vs Jason.

5.2/10

Bobby (2006)
A good effort from Emilio, 10 April 2014
6/10

A story of how President Kennedy was shot in the early hours of the morning and how it affected the lives of everyone around him. I don't remember much about this movie, but it did have some powerful moments. Emilio Estevez hung up his acting boots to sit in the Director's chair. He's a pretty good Director in all honesty. If you want a better example, watch The Way Way Back. It has an all-star cast that will knock the socks off of the most critical. I do remember that the cast kept me going, but it was a little bit too slow-paced for my liking. Political enthusiasts will likely find things to enjoy about this movie.

6/10

One of the most disingenuous sequels ever made, 10 April 2014
3/10

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

Lenny Feder (Sandler) moves in with his three best friends so they can be closer together. Lenny is forced to face his childhood bully (Steve Austin) and defend their town from an arrogant kid (Lautner) Kurt (Chris Rock) is appalled to learn that his wife (Rudolph) has forgotten an anniversary and plans to take advantage of this situation. Kevin Lamonsoff (James) is perturbed that his wife is making their son think he's a genius. Meanwhile, Marcus Higgins (Spade) finds out he is the father of a recalcitrant teenager. I'd write more about the plot, but I'm so disgusted with this sequel that I can't be bothered. I actually enjoyed Grown Ups to a certain extent. Sure it was lazy, but it had genuine moments and laughs to make up for it. It had a semblance of decency to it and made me look forward to this movie ever so slightly. I should have known that Adam Sandler would end up disappointing me again. He can't seem to make consistently entertaining films if his life depended on it these days. They go all out to be as crude as humanly possible in this one. Nothing is exempted in this movie. They even go as far as to make fun of mentally challenged people, which I thought was despicable (Played by the annoying Nick Swardson) This was here to make some cash, nothing more. You couldn't detect passion in this movie at all, it's impossible. Want more proof? Swardson defecated into a toilet in a furniture store and nobody throws him out (How lazy is that plot hole?) Sandler and his family get peed on by a moose, David Spade rolls down a hill for some misadventures in a giant tire. It's like they ran out of ideas and didn't feel like being creative. I bet they decided to say "Write down whatever you can think of, it will make money regardless" The sad thing is that this is true. People will flock to see this sort of thing. Sandler phones it in completely and gives one of the laziest performances you'll ever see. He's better than this. Watch Reign On Me or some of his earlier comedy films to see what I mean. James, Rock & Spade aren't very good. Steve Austin is wasted in his first major project in Hollywood. I thought he was fun as a bully, but they didn't use him very much. Taylor Lautner continues to try to shed his Twilight image to no avail. The finale has to be seen to be believed. It felt like something that was straight out of the movie 300.

I wrote much more than I should have for this movie. It is complete and utter garbage. I can't see how anyone could laugh at this lazy drivel. This isn't as bad as Jack & Jill, but what is? This is an awful movie that has barely any laughs. I don't know why I continue to waste money on Sandler.

3/10

Accept it for what it is and you'll have an OK time, 10 April 2014
6/10

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

In this remake of the original from 1985, Charley Brewster (Yelchin) seems to have it all for a nerd. He has one of the hottest girls in school named Amy (Poots) , he's popular with the jocks, and he has a rather relaxed lifestyle. His former best friend, Ed (Mintz-Plasse) is despondent over the way Charlie neglects him. Ed is thoroughly convinced that Charley's neighbor, Jerry (Farrell) is a vampire, but Charlie shrugs it off as ludicrous. When people keep disappearing, including Ed himself. Charlie is forced to reevaluate his beliefs. When he realizes that Jerry is a vampire and nobody believes him he enlists the help of magician, Peter Vincent to help kill Jerry.

Let's get the obvious out-of-the-way first. This remake is completely otiose in every way possible. I really like the original, but It wasn't necessarily calling for a remake. I saw this when it first came out and thought it was decent at best. For some reason I decided to give it another try. How did it fare this time around? About the same. This one is nowhere near as clever and hip as the original, even if it tries to be. It lacks the original's sharp humor to be as successful as it wants to be. I dig the "You're so cool Brewster" thing, but you have to suspend disbelief that a guy like Charlie can get a gorgeous woman like Amy. One thing this movie has going for it is great psychology. I liked the mind games from Colin Farrell. Speaking of Colin Farrell, I felt he was terrific as Jerry. He is very suave and charismatic, stealing every scene he was in. Chicks will love him. Anton Yelchin is great as Charlie. He truly felt like a nerd and I was behind him the entire way. Imogen Poots is hot as doughnut grease and a solid actress. I adored her in more ways than one. Toni Collette is decent, but I felt she was a bit too nonchalant when it came to things. David Tennant is a blast as Peter Vincent. I cracked up at his drunken antics and he clearly had fun in the role. A lot of the cast are impeccable and really made this movie more fun than it should have been. Mintz is one of the most overrated actors today. He basically does the same thing in every movie. He felt like McLovin' from Superbad, only more sadistic. He's very one-dimensional in my opinion and annoyed the crap out of me. There is plenty of blood, but it's mostly CGI.

This remake wasn't a complete failure. The cast makes it throughly watchable and fun at times. That being said, it doesn't change my opinion that this was pointless in the scheme of things. If you take it for what it is, you should be able find some entertainment value from it.

6.2/10

Well done but not exactly a pleasant experience, 10 April 2014
6/10

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

A budding writer moves away to move to a remote cabin somewhere in New York in the woods, with nothing but peace and quiet. Along the way, she encounters some mysterious men at a gas station. Not too long after, she is harassed and raped by the same men. She goes through an ugly transformation and turns into a female vigilante to get revenge on the rapists. This is one of the video nasties that people have talked about for years. It's up there with Last House on The Left, Virgin Spring, and Deliverance. Ostensibly, it was so bad that Roger Ebert walked out on the movie incensed. He gave it zero stars. With all due respect to Ebert, this movie wasn't made for the public. It's supposed to revolt you and be repulsive. This was never meant to be along the lines of "It's a Wonderful Life" This is a brutal revenge film and that's all there is to it. As far as revenge films are concerned, it succeeds in that aspect. In some ways I can see why it was banned. It's unrelentingly brutal in some scenes and the rape scenes are very hard to endure. I'm talking lengthy rape scenes that can make even the strongest of stomachs churn. The dialog is very simple, perhaps a bit lewd at times, but it fits the movie. I'm a guy and this movie reminded me of how disgusting other guys can be at times. It is a harsh reality of how guys view women at times. I can only imagine how difficult it was to film this movie for some of the cast members. The acting is decent for this sort of thing. Camille Keaton is gorgeous but a solid actress as well. Considering what she had to go through, I wouldn't be shocked if some of the emotion was real. It was a good job on her part. My only carp with her character is that I would have liked more character development. The people who portray the rapists are very good at playing perverted creeps, that's all I'll say. I'll be sure to word this as carefully as possible, but I was highly satisfied with the ending. Those that like violent revenge will be pleased. There isn't much gore, but many unforgettable images. I'll just say a castration is a highlight.

This movie won't be for everybody. If you found Last House on The Left engrossing, this will be right up your alley. It's not a movie I make a habit of watching often, but it's above average for what it is. If you have the stomach for it, check it out

6.6/10

One of the most awkward romantic comedies you'll ever see, 10 April 2014
4/10

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

Ryan Walker (Prinze) & Jennifer Burrows (Forlani) have a history that goes way back, all the way to the time they met each other randomly on a flight. It continues off and on until college. The only problem is that both are in a relationship and they have contrasting personalities. Jennifer is funny, perceptive, wise, and beautiful. Ryan is an uptight mess that doesn't like to be out of his comfort zone. After a while, they become great friends. Things get a bit complicated when they develop feelings for each other.

I saw this when it first came out years ago, strangely enough, I remember digging it. That is far from the case this time around. I was never bored, but it's one of the disingenuous romantic comedies I've seen in some time. Nothing in this movie felt genuine at all, despite the potential to be so. Right off the bat, we get conversations about orgasms and periods. When a romantic comedy pulls out all the stops in the beginning to try to get cheap laughs, you know you're in trouble. It tries to be clever and perceptive about the pratfalls of relationships to no avail. Despite the lame start, this movie did have potential to be a decent romantic comedy. It doesn't have the cast or the script to pull it off. It's also filled with unfunny slapstick that produces more groans than anything else. The only scene I laughed at is when Jason Biggs fakes being a priest and has a pool ball incident at a bar. That almost had me in stitches. The main problem is that I had trouble empathizing with any of the characters. All of them are rather obnoxious except for Biggs. Freddie Prinze Jr is a good guy in real life, but acting should have never been in his calling. His wooden style is painfully obvious. He lacks chemistry with Forlani and really brought the film down. Claire Forlani fares better and has the charm to spare. She's also gorgeous, but I felt her character was quite pretentious. There were a couple of times I wanted to smack her. Jason Biggs will never be known as a great actor, but I think he's funny. He injected some much needed life with his antics in this movie. The finale is completely clichéd and predictable. Forlani's monologue in the end made me cringe with how forced it sounded. Alyson Hannigan is wasted as a brief girlfriend of Prinze's. Amanda Detmer is OK as Forlani's odd friend.

I wouldn't exactly call it horrible, but it was certainly mediocre for the most part. It comes across as extremely awkward and very phony. Romantic Comedy enthusiasts may wanna give this a look, but you're not missing anything

4.8/10

It kept my interest if nothing else, 10 April 2014
6/10

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

Flippant television producer, Taylor Mendon (Broderick) has a knack for heavy drinking, drug abuse, and excessive gambling. After starting to turn his life around, his dull lifestyle leads him to gambling on horses, causing his wife (Tierney) to be exasperated at his actions. When he finds out his twenty-year old Niece Amanda (Snow) has a job as a hooker in Las Vegas he promises to send Amanda to rehab, and promises his wife he won't gamble. Unfortunately for Taylor, things don't go exactly as planned

This is a very minor film that doesn't amount to much in the scheme of things. The script is nowhere near strong enough to ascend like it wants to. That being said, I definitely had a decent time with this movie. The acting is as consummate as you're going to find. It's one of Broderick's quirky projects he made around this time. I'm sure he is set for life with the money he's made, and doesn't exactly need to be a top star these days. This is the type of movie that won't appeal to everyone. For the people who love blockbusters, you'll probably be bored silly. Those that appreciate an above average character study should find at least a fair amount to like here. I would especially recommend this movie to addicts of any kind. Many people have had drug and alcohol issues, especially with gambling. On the downside of things, this movie isn't able to harness the immense potential it has. The relationship between Taylor and Amanda wasn't explored enough for my liking. It all felt cold to me. Matthew Broderick is far too hypocritical to be sympathetic. His pretentious demeanor will have a lot of people indifferent or annoyed at him. Broderick himself is solid as usual in a monotonous sort of way. In my opinion it's Brittany Snow that steals the show here. She is poised for her age and mature beyond her years. Despite having to contend with a disappointing script, she gives it her all. Her energy and charisma was a lot of fun to watch. Maura Tierney is solid as the wife, but doesn't have that much to do but play a frustrated wife. I'd like to have seen more depth from her character.

All my criticism aside, this is a good time-waster. I just wish the characters were a tad easier to relate to. I didn't think they went as far as they could have, but oh well. It's worth a look

6.3/10


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