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Alien Armageddon (2011)
Why a 9 and not a 10? Because I couldn't watch it on the big screen. I mean the special effects were so amazing, acting spot on, script was Shakespeare worth. I mean come on, there is no better movie out there that captures LA through the eyes of a homeless drug addict.
Watch it high, on shrooms acid or a grip Robitussin PM, won't regret it!
And the jews in this movie are awesome, always asking for a discount and neglecting customers. Gun fights from 10 feet away are pure win. I think this movie could only be improved on if it had vampires and demon gummy bears.
Vampires Suck (2010)
Much better than a 3.3
Honestly this is much better than all the parody movie that came after scary movie. It wasn't too over the top or too random and that what makes it very enjoyable to watch. Also it wasn't profane, I can only remember one time they said the P word (kitty) all else was G-rated basically. The actress who played the parody version of Bella was SPOT ON, lol. I actually saw the first two twilight movies (long story) so I got a really good kick out of this movie. Also in this movie they rolled up the trilogy all up into one. Funny thing was that some of the things that happened in the original movies are just shown verbatim in this parody movie since it was just too funny not to include it.
If you like slapstick comedy then watch this and laugh.
Overview of the movie
First off, let me say that I don't care what any movie's budget is, all that matter is if it's done well.
That being said, Skyline had a low budget and it showed while not having anything else redeeming. The first 15~20mins of the movie I was pretty engaged. From there it just kept going down hill. Instead of writing out a long drawn out synopsis, I'll just give my overview in bullet points.
Things that led you to think was more, but wasn't.
*The part about the woman being pregnant seemed like it was going some where, but in the end, didn't matter really.
*Turk (the black guy from scrubs) had some character development and seemed like there was some social conflicts to deal with... nope killed.
*Background character becomes a main character(why?), the guy's paranoia and persistence to stay makes you think maybe he's working for the other side, nope just a guy.
*Jared (Alien Neo!) character was persistent in getting out to the docks made you think something was going to happen, nope, nothing.
*Jared's persistence makes you think that maybe he's being controlled, nope nothing.
*Jared's comment about the aliens not being over water makes you think maybe there's something there, nope just what ifs.
*Showing us Day ONE, and Day TWO, etc, seemed like it was leading up to something... but there was nothing. Maybe they thought the audience forgot that after night comes day again and that needed to be retold that a day passed by. Maybe if say it skipped ahead and it was like Day Four, then Day Ten, to express how desperate things are getting.
==Lack of Research==
*When the nuke goes off on the alien ship, the shock waves felt weak and the portrayal of the after affects didn't makes sense, like how all the characters could easily stare at the WHITE light of the explosion.
*The military forces acted like it was their first time.
*Sniper teams with no spotters.
*Snipers using their weapons as regular rifles and just shooting.
*The use of UAV were like that of a video game and just dumping them at the enemy.
*WTF DO YOU NEED A UAV TO DELIVER A NUKE WHEN YOU HAVE REAL ICBM TO DEAL WITH IT!
*Where were the tanks? Humvees? Ground Troops? Attack Choppers?
*Why did the fighter jets only shoot bullets and seemed like they weren't equipped with any bombs or missiles to engage targets that were the size of buildings?
*Why have a background character (the apt employee) jump into the scene and take place of the second main male character(the black guy) when he wasn't developed and the other was?
==Cheesy moments that weren't meant to be==
*Garage gate scene was comical, people actually laughed in the audience.
*Jared's nerd rage on the alien looked extremely odd with funky punches.
*The "I hate LA" was my favorite cheesy line since it made me laugh, I also hate LA, lol.
*Jared's brain glows red... really... couldn't we have guessed when the alien went AWOL? I felt like it was a weird episode of Red vs Blue.
*When the employee tried to blow up the room by trying to light the gas leak and the lighter didn't work it came of comedic (maybe that's what they wanted) and I don't think it helped the scene.
*After the employee hits the alien with his SUV, it seemed like it killed it, maybe by smashing its brains, but some how it was able to still revive itself and then grab a new brain, which it needs to function... seemed a bit like a chicken and the egg conundrum...
*Jared for some reason wants to keep his nerd rage powers a secrete... wait why?
Ending thoughts, the only cool part was the end when Jared got turned into an alien, but kept his own will. That should have happened on "DAY ONE" so that there was something interesting going on. Instead we are left with a Alien version of Neo from the Matrix, who also has comparable acting abilities.
And if they are going to shoot the ENTIRE movie in one building I seriously think they should try to play it up more. I mean we (the audience) just kept seeing the same scene one after another, it went, apt room, pool, roof, apt room, garage, pool, garage, apt room, roof. There was no trapped in the dark in the stairwell, fights in the hall way, not even checking to see for supplies in other rooms. The character was just so bent on leaving he wanted to come up with any excuse possible.
Not as good as Pirates, but still great
I thought the movie was great. People really need to get off their high horse on historical accuracy, this is a fictional movie... Either way, I thought that they did a great job, feels like Aladdin meets Lion King. If you like action, some light plot twists, nothing overly complicated but just enough to keep you interested then this is the movie for you.
Costume designs were great, the acrobatics were great, and as a gamer, this is the best video game to movie ever.
I really hope every video game that is decided to be turned into a movie gets as much thought and effort as this movie got.