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Out of the Dark (1988)
Starts put quite fun but goes to far
I had wanted to see this move for awhile and finally found an old VHS copy for 50p. It started out as quite a promising cheap thriller with some interesting cameo appearances promised in the main titles (Divine, Tab Hunter, Lainie Kazan, etc -- all from the movie Lust In The Dust). The first two thirds of the movie were good but the last part really spoiled it with a ridiculous ending and a poorly handled twist. That said i'll probably watch it again one of these days. Incidentally, the 1992 cable movie Intimate Stranger starring Deborah Harry totally 'borrows' the beginning to this film, virtually scene for scene/word for word too. If you like this movie, you'll like that one too.
Miami Vice (2006)
Fans, you'll be praying for the acting talents of Sheena Easton!
I saw Miami Vice yesterday, it is an abomination! I can understand the need to keep things fresh and update a franchise. However, this is basically a very boring 'action' film incidentally entitled 'Miami Vice'. In particular Colin Farrell's pitiful performance bore no relation to the Crockett i'm familiar with. What Miami Vice the TV series lacked in depth it always made up for with a bit of humour and a good soundtrack, both were absent in this film. I'm glad it's flopped and there wont be sequel, its an insult to a decent TV show, very fondly remembered. Everyone involved in this movie should be thoroughly ashamed. The only good thing that will come of it is the continued release of the season box sets to cash in on the undoubted flock for the real thing when disappointed cinema go-ers head for their nearest DVD store. Horrible. PS. I do like Sheena as Caitlin Crockett in Season 4, "I Got You Babe *do do do*", in fact she's much better than the love interest in this lame duck.
Before I start my mini-review of Reeker, I must say that I am by no means a high-brow movie buff. The classiest movie I own is Aliens and let it be known that I have DVD's starring the likes of Hulk Hogan, and the great Pia Zadora, and even such classics as Hell Come To Frogtown and the Complete Friday the 13th box set have a place in my collection, I even have Glitter somewhere! Even for a disposable flick, this movie is cheap! I'm talking Poundland. cheap! The killer is invisible throughout at least half of this piece of nonsense. As far as special effects goes, I haven't seen dismembered bodies this ropey since they last showed Day Of The Dead on the Sci-Fi Channel! In fact I think the ones from that movie were better, even though it was made 20 years ago! I will spare you yet another synopsis of this excuse for a 'horror' flick, but I feel it does earn its 1 star for the finale which does help make sense of 90mins of one dull incoherent cliché after another. There are no scares, and certainly no laughs to be had with this lame effort. Rent one of the bad movie classics I mentioned earlier if you have an evening to kill, don't waste time on the Reeker, it stinks!
85 million dollars for what looks like, and plays like a TV movie
This movie looked horribly cheap for it's budget, cheap sets, virtually no locations, cheap lame script, but it featured name actors. However, that doesn't mean it still didn't come off like a made for television movie. The acting was pleasant enough but it could hardly be called great. It's nice to see Shirley McLaine & Michael Caine on screen together, but they really are above this kind of thing. It reminded me a lot of Mariah Carey's movie 'Glitter', but without the good soundtrack. Vacuous and empty but not the worst thing you'll ever see. One to rent if your very bored. Better still watch the classic TV show. Credit where credit is due though, Nicole Kidman can certainly do Samantha's nose thing!
The Devil's Rejects (2005)
Great follow up
This movie has some classic ingredients for a great horror movie. Interesting characters, some really vile gore scenes, bad language, unnecessary nudity, and some familiar faces; Leslie Easterbrook (from the Police Academy movies), Ken Foree (the original Dawn Of The Dead), 80's pop singer/actress E.G. Daily and Michael Berryman (The Hills Have Eyes) provide more than enough nostalgia for retro junkies, like myself.
The story isn't overly fast paced but the gore can be thick and pretty relentless and is at times implied rather than shown which I think adds to the experience. I really enjoyed Leslie Easterbrook as Mother Firefly (replacing Karen Black who was in the first movie, House Of 1000 Corpses). She does some wonderful overacting in her scenes, it's a shame she wasn't in it more, same goes for E.G. Daily who plays a sassy hooker. In fact everyone was great in their parts, let's face it this is not Shakespeare - this is a horror movie, I for one demand hammy over the top performances and a bit of camp! I don't want to give anything away but I will say my favourite scenes involved Mother Firefly and the sheriff, and Captain Spaulding and a mother and child. If you enjoyed House Of 1000 Corpses, this is a superior sequel in my mind and you wont be disappointed. If your idea of horror is a glossy PG-13 rated remake you might want to try weaning yourself onto this kind of movie with something a little less extreme.
This was quite a good documentary. It was shown on BBC1 the week after Sheena Easton's 2000 album 'Fabulous' was released. We see Sheena on the gondolas at the Venetian in Las Vegas, on stage with David Cassidy, in the recording studio, making her video, and appearing at London's G-A-Y! Sheena discusses her new album, her 20 year career, and why she decided to make a comeback. There are interviews with various 'celebrities' and there is lots of footage from her debut on 'The Big Time', her stint on Miami Vice, getting canned off the stage in Scotland, and a stroppy interview with newswoman Kirsty Wark. Entertaining stuff! Sadly the album was a huge bomb and Sheena hasn't come back since.
The Sharon Osbourne Show (2003)
I really like this
I think this show is great. I try to watch it whenever I can. I think Sharon's relaxed approach is so refreshing and easy to watch. It airs on Sky One here in the UK in the afternoons and gets repeated in the evenings on their +1 channel. I think she has some great guests and I really like the way she incorporates some live music into the show. I can understand why some people don't like it because Sharon lacks the professionalism of most other talk show hosts. However, I think that's what makes it more enjoyable. I know it would be naive to say that she is like an everyday person, she's a multimillionairess who lives in Beverly Hills! But she has a certain worldliness and a down to earth quality that really comes across. It's a shame it was axed. It's less sensationalized than MTV's 'The Osbourne's' and should you want to see what the 'real' person is like then I reckon this is the best show to watch.
If you think you've seen a bad talk show, you ain't seen nothing' yet!
This show was absolutely appalling. Poor Cybill! She should fire her agent for this one. The premise of the show was that each episode would have a topic or two and then the discussion would be put to a small panel of guests. Half were women, half men. Not the worst idea in the world but not a particularly fresh one either. It was just rubbish! It got the worst viewing figures of all the talk shows in America and probably in England too where it aired on UK Living. Cybill looked totally out of her depth. She read every line very obviously off an auto-cue. It was horrific! And even worse, boring as hell! She is a much better actress than a presenter. Her sitcom was great but this was just the worst.
VH1 Divas 2004 (2004)
This should have rocked. VH1 moved away from the traditional divas (Whitney Houston, Celine Dion, etc.) that had made the 2003 show so stale. Sadly the move backfired. The show had no MC keeping the show together. Queen Latifah did a fantastic show at the 2003 Divas. The show kicked of with a horrific rendition of Lady Marmalade featuring Patti Labelle, Cyndi Lauper, and Jessica Simpson. Okay in the studio with some control they can all sound great.
However, when they are competing with each other (why?) it just sounds torturous! Jessica Simpson has the most bizarre facial expressions when she sings that i've ever witnessed! Cyndi Lauper also performed Girl Just Wanna Have Fun. That wasn't as bad but it was hardly impressive. The worst was yet to come! Cyndi and Patti Labelle teamed up to perform Cyndi's hit 'Time After Time'. It was acoustic, and didn't fit in with the rest of the show. Still it could've been okay if they both hadn't insisted on squealing like mamed animals. It was just dire.
Debbie Harry (from Blondie) is always cool. She has a style of her own and although maybe she can't compete vocally with a many of the divas although she certainly can sing very well. Debbie came out and performed Blondie's #1 hit 'Rapture'. With some lovely vocals. She really hit the notes perfectly. She looked stunning. Rapper Eve provided a new, but sadly inferior rap. It was good. Debbie's next performance was a team-up with newcomer Joss Stone. They performed the Blondie hit 'One Way Or Another'. I think Joss misunderstood the style of the song and just shouted over Debbie. A rather sad bit was when Debbie tried and failed to match her shouty style which spoiled it a bit. She should've just let Joss get on with her totally inappropriate warballing. The whole of Blondie performed this track. The final track Debbie performed was Blondie's massive hit 'Call Me'. It was pretty poor. Not Debbie's fault because you just couldn't hear her. The sound was atrocious all the way through the show.
Joss Stone also performed a few songs on her own. They were quite well done. Ashanti also showed up to perform two inexplicable cover versions. Firstly she did Diana Ross' 'I'm Coming Out', and then Chaka Khan's 'Ain't Nobody'. She is not a diva! She can sing to an extent but she has no presence whatsoever. Why not just get the real singers in. Chaka was even interviewed on the show....
Gladys Knight showed up and did a medley. It was very good. She was probably the best bit of the show. I don't know much about her other than she is a seasoned performer in Las Vegas and her experience and class really shone through. Patti Labelle fitted in another performance this time her 80's hit 'New Attitude'. It was the finale and it was okay but it was too little to late. This was one big dud. Better luck next time VH1.
The version I saw was a heavily edited 55min version which was shown on VH1 in the UK. If these were the best bits.....
Voyage of the Rock Aliens (1984)
Pia Zadora is my new favourite 80's leading lady. This film is atrocious. The acting is bad, every joke falls flat, and the aliens are annoying beyond belief! I like the songs a lot. Bizzarely many of them are badly re-recorded versions of Pia's own songs. This is most obvious in 'A Little Bit Of Heaven' which she sings here with the alien commander Absid. Fans of trashy 80's movies will love it! It's even worse than Xanadu and Grease 2! Pia's outfits rock too! I'd give the plot 1/10, the acting 1/10, the feel-good factor is at least a 7/10, and the soundtrack is a 10/10 or 1/10 depending on your taste in music. Watch out for Pia's all singing, all dancing performance in the ladies room! Hilarity awaits you.... Buy, buy, buy!