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Wolves of Wall Street (2002)
Stay away ... Far away
Wolves of Wall Street has an interesting concept. But, that is the only interesting element in this movie.
Here a Wall Street wanna-be fresh out of school and with no luck finding a position elsewhere joins a highly successful all-male Wall Street Firm whose initiation consists of transforming the new members into werewolves.
Now a Wall Street werewolf may be a new concept.
The concept that a werewolf is just a person in dark lighting, some blue make-up who catches his victims with his "odor" while novel is AWFUL. The reason it wasn't tried before is that it doesn't work.
The werewolves in the film are supposed to be completely irresistible to women, but there is hardly any evidence of this in the film. They cut in and out repeatedly of the two or so scenes of anything remotely erotic. And, I stress REMOTELY.
These werewolves are too "suave" to hunt or chase their prey. They just approach their intended victim and let their exuding natural pheromones do the rest. And other than a wet kiss on the victims' thigh, there doesn't seems to be much other damage.
I did learn this though: with pheromones, a designer suit and just the right "I'm too hot for you" glance, a werewolf can even "convert" a lesbian. But, in this case, a "lesbian" is a woman the werewolf can't get any vibes from. Sounds like the guy who gets rejected at the bar!
Nothing scary... No suspense... No special effects... No sex...
These wolves don't even have canine teeth!
If you want to see male models parading in fine suits looking smug, you will be quite pleased. The entire budget seems to be spent on clothes and bad actors, in that order.
Do yourself a favor ... just pass.
Perfectly Legal (2002)
Plot good, nudity lacking
I watched this movie on The Movie Channel, and it appears on the Showtime family of channels. It was rated R and ran for about 89 minutes. Apparently 10-11 minutes were edited out from the 100 minute version listed on IMDb.com.
The plot was well above average for the soft-core genre, but there was far less nudity than usual for this type of film. The acting was fine. There were 6 actresses who, with the exception of "adult film" star Ms. Swift, specialize in this genre.
The story has echoes of the classic "Adam's Rib" with the two "lover by night" attorneys as adversaries in the court room of a divorce case. Ms. Hays plays the ambitious, work-aholic, soon-to-be evicted divorce lawyer (the only major plot flaw - how can a successful divorce lawyer who gets rich clients due a magazine article documenting her acumen, be anywhere near broke?!?). After her boyfriend leaves her for putting her work over their relationship, in the old Hollywood cliché, she literally bumps into the man who will be her love interest.
Ms. Miller is her client who alleges that her husband has created a lucrative book and video from the research in her stolen diary. Ms. Lynne, a personal favorite of mine, shines as the ambitious paralegal of her adversary/love interest. Ms. Wyote plays her friend and a satisfied video client. The under-used, exotic and stunning Ananda Saint James (created as "Amanda") plays a model who catches Ms. Hays' neglected boyfriend on the rebound (she should be cast more often). Ms. Swift appears as an interviewer who falls for the charms of the defendant/husband.
Will Ms. Hays be able to prove that the husband stole his wife's work and thus defeat her lover/adversary? NUDITY SPOILERS based upon the version I reviewed as noted above.
Nudity is far below average with no front nudity below the navel. Of the approximately 89 minutes of the movie, there are about 17 minutes of nude scenes. Even if all 10-11 missing minutes are all nudity and were added to the film, that is well below average for the genre. The nudity is mostly the result of straight one-on-one love scenes with one masturbation scene and clips from the "video" under litigation. There are no "girl-girl" scenes, which is always a minus. But, I always appreciate the omission of the perfunctory shower and dressing scenes.
With one exception, all of the credited actresses have nude scenes. Ms. Parent, who is listed as a "special appearance" under her oft-used alias of 'Scarlet Johansing' does not have a nude scene. Most of the actress have one 2-minute nude scene each.
Ms. Hays has three nude scenes with two different actors of about 5 minutes in total. The first with her pouting, neglected boyfriend at about 7 minutes into the film. The second is at about 41 minutes in with her masturbating to the contested video. Her final scene with her lover/adversary is at about 48 minutes in.
Ms. Saint James' scene is about 14 minutes into the film and is just under 2 minutes long. The scene is about evenly divided between photo-shoot and love scene.
Ms. Swift appears at about 22 minutes in and is about 2 minutes long. The reward of getting to the hour point of the film is Ms. Lynne's only scene which is also about 2 minutes long. Ms. Miller's 2 minute scene comes at about 74 (1:14) minutes into the film. There are brief clips of the video which is the "McGuffin" of the story and, as such, not well covered, These appear in the opening credits and are reprised in Ms. Hays' masturbation scene. Once again this totals about 2 minutes in length.
One unintentional moment of humor is when Ms. Miller bites on the puca shell necklace of her estranged husband in her love scene. It thought at first she was biting on one of those candy necklace kids have.
CONCLUSION For an "after hours" movie the acting was average, the plot well above average, the nudity well below average (no "lower" shots, likely edited out, and only 17 minutes with a maximum of 28), no one "new" to look at, and nothing that stands out as a "must watch" scene. The film was not as painful to watch as most of this type. Since the main "purpose" of this type of movie are the love scenes and nudity I rated it as a 3 out of 10.
Naked Ambition (2005)
Average for genre
I watched this movie on Showtime on Demand, rated TV-MA.
It is an average movie for the soft-core detective genre. The acting is fine for the four, primarily, "adult film" actresses.
The story is fairly predictable. Ms. Drake is the naive actress wanna-be who is found dead after scoring with Hollywood's hottest new star. Ms. Lick stars as her crime-scene investigator sister who gathers evidence the inept local technicians miss. Ms. Vincent is the cheating Hollywood star's jealous plaything, though she is quite active herself. Ms. Eden plays a party girl who has little to do with the plot other then to reveal the star's manager as a pimp for the star, as if that revelation was needed.
The crux of the plot is who killed Ms. Drake's character. Is it the star, the manager or the plaything?
NUDITY SPOILERS Nudity is below average with little or no front nudity below the navel. Of the 91 minutes, there are about 31 minutes of nude scenes. The nudity is all the result of straight one-on-one love scenes. There are no "girl-girl" scenes, which is always a minus. But, I did enjoy the omission of the perfunctory shower and dressing scenes.
Ms. Drake has one love scene at about 16 minutes into the film with about 5 short clips based on this scene throughout the movie. Total time is about 5.5 minutes.
Ms. Vincent has three love scenes with three different actors. The one with the manager is 9 minutes in. The one with the detective is about 66 (1:06) minutes into the movie. The one with her star boyfriend starts at about 29 minutes in and continues about 34 minutes in with various interruptions; this one is filmed outdoors and has the best lighting. Total time is about 11.5 minutes.
Ms. Lick, the erstwhile star and heroine, has three love scenes with two actors: her detective love-interest at about 51 and 86 (1:26) minutes in the movie; the star she suspects of killing her sister at about 77 (1:17) in, and I judged to be her best in the film, with a very good, albeit fake, oral sex bit. Total time is about 9 minutes.
Ms. Eden has two love scenes with two different actors. The first is at the very start of the movie and the second about 42 minutes in. Total time is about 5.5 minutes.
CONCLUSION For an "after hours" movie the acting was above average, the plot average, the nudity slightly below average (no "lower" shots and two bad boob jobs on Ms.'s Drake and Lick), no one "new" to look at, and nothing that stands out as a "must watch" scene. But, surprisingly, it was not painful to watch, as are most of the genre.
Deviant Vixens I (2001)
Nothing deviant. No vixens. Pure stale formula.
Deviant Vixens is of the soft-core adult genre. But even for its type, it is boring beyond belief. It is merely a series of faux sex scenes cut together with absolutely no plot or any interesting scenarios.
Veronica Hart, the 70's porn actress credited as Jane Hamilton, is a real estate broker who meets a couple interested in buying an old hotel (the wife is played by Gabriella Hall).
The film consists of the 3 characters walking around the hotel, looking in windows, tramping from room to room. Each new room causes the trio to tap into the memories of a couple who had sex in the room. There is no real connection between the sex scene, the room or the trio wandering about the abandoned hotel. The trio of credited characters is a device upon which to hang some rather lame, disconnected sex scenes.
While truly this is a device endemic to the bad porn movie, it is even worse when there is no porn.
If you actually take note of an actress who may be interesting to watch in a better film, you can't get her name. There are over 25 actresses listed without roles in the end credits and about a dozen sex scenes - none with more than one actress. Sadly I think that means that there are more movies expected of this type, (yes, a series!) and the producers are too cheap to use different end titles.
There is nothing remotely erotic here. Nothing different or special. And the "old standby" lesbian stuff is outright omitted. The only girl-girl "action" is Hart briefly rubbing Gabriella Hall's blouse. Thankfully Hart who must be pushing 50 is dressed for the entire film. Hall has a brief nude scene. She's been much better.
Change the channel. Watch something else. Red Shoe Diaries might be on.