Reviews written by registered user
valens-1

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12 reviews in total 
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Cars (2006)
4 out of 26 people found the following review useful:
drop that ball Pixar, d'oh, 7 June 2006
4/10

As soon as I heard that the new Pixar film was going to be about cars and especially naascar, i was fearful, whereas the car circuit is big in America, it means nothing overseas. And I was proved right. When the lead characters motivation is to get a sponsorship deal, these people have lost sight they are making a film for children. When Michael Schumacher turned up at the end, I knew Pixar had officially jumped the shark. My 4 year old son has no idea, nor cares who he is. What a flop. The lead car is really unlikable, and all the voice work is really tiresome, as if no one wanted to be there. While i have to say the animation is probably the best I have ever seen, as the film is slow, dimly written,(there are no new jokes or situations in evidence here), it does amuse me the the first film released by Pixar since Disney brought them is this second rate flick that would be right at home on the Disney release schedule

Ethan Mao (2004)
12 out of 14 people found the following review useful:
Excellent, see it now, 10 May 2005
9/10

I would say this is one of the best gay, Asian love stories ever made, but it isn't. It's just a great film whose lead characters happen to be gay hustlers. As their families have abandoned them, they have to use whatever is at hand to survive. At first, there seems to be no reason for their relationship, and the whole self sacrificing nature of Romeo seem too over the top. Only it soon becomes clear what is really going on. But the great strength of the film is it is about the effect parents violence and coldness affects children, often manifesting itself in dangerous and self destructive ways. At the end, realizing what a beautiful film the director had crafted, I would have to say it is one of the best independent gay American films ever made. But I have always been a sucker for a romance in disguise

20 out of 52 people found the following review useful:
Is everyone drunk?, 25 April 2005
5/10

What a failure. Sure, the jokes from the books, radio show, et al, that survive are good, but the rest of the film is not funny. And the 'storyline' they've put on the story stinks. They should have left well enough alone. The romance between Arthur and Trillian is terrible, (that girl is the worst actress ever), and this film is for fans alone, who want to have their hearts broken. Avoid this, unless you want to have your heart broken. Mos Def looks sop bored, and spends most of the film looking like he has no idea how he ended up in this stink hole. I once meet Douglas Adams when he came to New Zealand. It was after he head been fired from Dr Who, and seemed to find the idea of being at the bottom of the world entertaining. He would loath this film, but would like the idea of other people discovering his work through cinema. God, the books and radio and television shows are so much better

2 out of 12 people found the following review useful:
what a disappointment, 8 December 2004
4/10

Sorry Pixar, Sorry Brad Bird, sorry America,this is a huge disappointment. While the animation is the best ever, except for Studio Ghilbi, but the storyline is truly wrong. Apart from owing a huge debt to 'Watchmen', it is so slow to get going, who cares about the marriage being in trouble and lies being a theme of the relationship, if I want Cassavettes, I'll watch one of his film, this is a unsutiable storyline for a kids film, and if Pixar think this is 'aging' up the stories, sorry, the three kids I took were so bored by the parents relationship, there is no villain for the first half, if not more, of the film, and after Iron Giant, this is not nearly as good. Think again, people, this is not good enough, and it is so America, f**k yeah, I just know this film is going to do really badly overseas, not nearly on a par with Nemo. Not as good as you are all saying. Try harder 1 out of 5,(o.k.,two for the stunning animation) Watch Studio Ghilbi stuff, kicks this craps ass

7 out of 11 people found the following review useful:
The best film ever made in New Zealand, 29 November 2004
9/10

New Zealand film-making is very up and down,generally down. But 'In my Father's Den' is not just the best N.Z. movie, it is one of the best film of the year. No knowledge of the country is required to understand the film,(unlike Whale Rider), it is beautifully shot, but, mainly, the story is totally brilliant. A mix of Momento, Secret and Lies and Lantana, this view of parents, their children, communities and values is one of the best films you'll ever see. A great,(and sexy), cast also add another level of brilliance to this must-see film. Don't want to talk about the story,(I knew to much when I saw it), anyone who likes their emotions true in cinema will love this film. 10 out of 10 just see it

2 out of 3 people found the following review useful:
The best film ever made in New Zealand, 29 November 2004
9/10

New Zealand film-making is very up and down,generally down. But 'In my Father's Den' is not just the best N.Z. movie, it is one of the best film of the year. No knowledge of the country is required to understand the film,(unlike Whale Rider), it is beautifully shot, but, mainly, the story is totally brilliant. A mix of Momento, Secret and Lies and Lantana, this view of parents, their children, communities and values is one of the best films you'll ever see. A great,(and sexy), cast also add another level of brilliance to this must-see film. Don't want to talk about the story,(I knew to much when I saw it), anyone who likes their emotions true in cinema will love this film. 10 out of 10 just see it

Wimbledon (2004)
The best English Romantic Comedy in years, 15 September 2004
8/10

The recent glut of god-awful ro-coms from England,(Notting Hill, 4 Weddings), has been slowly driving me crazy. So, I was not exactly excited to see this film. I was wrong. It reminded me of the excellent sports ro-com 'Love and Basketball', and as with that cool flick, 'Wimbeldon has a lot of the same charms. The film doesn't focus on solely the sport or the budding romance,instead melding the two for a very successful mix. Bettany and Dunst are funny and cute,(although their tennis playing sucks), and except for the usual dull performance from Sam Neill,(someone wake him up when the camera is on, please), all the actors are very good. Funny and sexy, if they get the ad campaign right, this could be a sleeper hit. Lotsa fun.

2 out of 8 people found the following review useful:
Oh, dear. What a crock!, 23 November 2003
3/10

Awful inwatchable, why get a director like Peter Weir, (likes small films, lots of emotion and HUMAN interaction), this is trying to be Gladiator on the high seas, but all the revisionist dialogue, and nothing happening for the middle hour, I found this film , with its' very bad digital graphics, unwatchable hell. Crowe also, blew chunks. Avoid.

1 out of 1 people found the following review useful:
oh, dear, back to baby films please, 25 September 2003

I do not expect anyone to pay money to see a film obviously shot on video at the cinema, and certinaly no reason to pay to see such a crappy storyline, Johhny Depp doing Another role with no focus or control, (please, Johnny, take the medication), but also so sloppily shot. The BIGGEST dissapointment of the year. I would much more like to see Spy Kids 4. This was onr of the worst films of the year. Come back, Michael Cimino, all is forgiven.

Frida (2002)
sad, 19 November 2002

Why do bio-pics always suck? Because the people who make are obsessed with the subject person, so any real truth goes, and you get a nicely nice dull fake version of peoples lives. No reality. Just dull, but still better than the worst film ever made, Malcolm X Avoid frida


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