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Night of the Demons (1988)
The Invitation is in the Mail
Night of the Demons is a classic case of a cheesy gory 80s horror movie that may seem slightly dated but still maintains its entertainment factor. A bunch of teens decided to party at Hull House, a funeral home that happens to be the sight of several evil things throughout the years. Kick in a séance and before you know it a demon is summoned and starts possessing and turning the others into demons. Simple premise but it works. The effects are good, there is plenty of TnA and the opening theme that plays over the credits is awesome. They just don't make them like this anymore. Get your invite and attend this party. Its a fun and entertaining movie as long as you don't take it too seriously.
Battle of the Damned (2013)
Zombie Problem? Call in the Killer Robots.
Battle of the Damned has a great idea going for it. A somewhat unique premise in the execution but its all hampered down by a small budget. Don't get me wrong their is some fun to be had with this movie plus it doesn't try to be anything that its not. Dolph Lundgren is a soldier for hire who gets employed by an individual who wants him to go into a quarantined city of infected people and rescue his daughter. Sure you can call them infected or zombies but essentially they are like the infected in 28 Days Later as in they are fast moving and are more prone to bite and tear than eat. So Lundgren's crew doesn't last long and its up to him and only him to find the target and get her out. Along the way he finds some survivors that are led by one who is addicted to his position and they end up clashing. Also while trapped in the city Dolph and his fellow survivors come across Robots that happen to have wondered into the city fresh off of malfunctioning and killing people from another movie called Robotropolis. So how to get out of the city alive? Reprogram the robots and let them pave a way. I'll admit its a good idea but the acting is uneven, Dolph is showing his age and the budget isn't high enough to properly execute this idea. With that said its entertaining and has a good idea going for it. Sure its not for everybody but its fairly good in the end for what they had to work with.
Android Insurrection (2012)
From the start to the end the first thing you will notice about this movie is the low budget and amateur acting. Budget so low there are only 3 types of robots and 1 is used 3 times as guards. The plot involves a group of soldiers sent to retrieve a robot from a robot stronghold. That is about it. The stronghold looks like an office building and a garage. The robots look about on line with PS1 graphics and the acting is awful. Flat dialog left and right as the actors go through the motions. For a min I thought I was watching something from the asylum but even they are not responsible for this train wreck. You know its a chore if you're looking at the clock several times during its 75 min running time. The CGI is about as cheap as the budget. The robots look bad, the gunfire is cgi and as the actors just shoot wildly at the green screen you can't help but laugh. A time waster if anything and only for those who can watch bad movies longer than 10 min.
Carrie: The Jean Grey teen years
Another horror remake that for the most part was not needed. Sure the story has been updated but it lacks what makes the original a classic. Chloe Grace Mortez is miscast as the shy awkward teen Carrie White. Yeah she is a good actress but she just isn't believable in the role. I never bought she would have been picked on and bullied by the popular girls. Julianne Moore is the saving grace as the mother as I felt she did the part justice. Problem is she can only carry the movie so far. With the original there was a slow build to Carrie discovering and using her powers but here she uses her powers left and right with just a minimum of her learning about it.It could have been a series of scenes in an X Men movie. She moves this that and the other and by the time we get to the prom there is no surprise. Which brings me to the films biggest fault. They drop the ball completely on the prom scene. If they had upped the violence and made her really lose it then maybe the payoff would have been better. Here she has full conscious of who she attacks and kills or hurts. The original had Carrie pushed to her brink and her powers unleashed a hellish fury. That isn't present here at all. I was quite disappointed with the final results. Way over the top CG effects just hamper down the mess even more.Sure the main tormentor gets hers but that after Carrie lifts the car she and her boyfriend are in and lets it rip into a gas station. As you watch the scene Carrie does it all while using her arms as a catalyst for the telekinesis just as Jean Grey might have done. Its what I kept thinking as I watched the movie and it just didn't seem to fit. Is this remake terrible? No, but its a mixed bag. Watered down for today's teen audience and masquerading as an R movie. Stick with the original '76 version instead. That version is quite superior.
Killjoy 3 (2010)
Can't keep this clown down
What essentially hurt the Killjoy movies was the first 2. Part 1 was awful and 2 wasn't much better. Killjoy 3 turns this around and does what the franchise should have done with to begin with. Gone is the urban setting. Gone is the shoestring budget. Gone is the horrid script. Gone is the annoying main character. This one actually makes Killjoy ghoulishly demonic and semi menacing. The story evolves around Killjoy being resurrected once again but not told the victim he is to kill. So in turn he and his newly formed minions are trapped in a mirror which serves as a portal to their world. The mirror gets delivered to a house a group of kids are house sitting and as you can guess they get sucked into Killjoy's world. Full moon seemed to set out and make a decent Killjoy movie which they did. Is it great? No but its entertaining. Killjoy's minions are also a welcome addition (especially Batty Boop) and add some to the movie. Granted this is for fans of the genre or fans of full moon but it works in its own way. 5 out 10. Hopefully these movies keep going this route. It seems Killjoy can't be kept down.
Clearly derailed off the tracks
A train full of terrorists. A biological weapon. Sound familiar? Well it is due to the fact Derailed borrows most of its ideas and scenarios from other movies. Jean Claude Van Damme stars as a special agent trying to get a thief and her cargo from one point to another. Mode of transportation is a train and like most action fans will immediately think of is Under Siege 2. Of course that movie utilized this idea much better but we are working on a much lower budget. The cargo happens to be vials of a toxic nature that so happen to be wanted by the bad guys. This movie is strictly for hardcore Van Damme fans only. Essentially he is the only real saving grace of the movie as is Laura Harring who plays the thief. The biggest problem with this film? Everything else. Borrowed story, terrible editing, horrible cheap effects, sound design that needs to be heard to be believed. For i'm certain movie fans can pick up sound effects from other things that are used in certain spots throughout. JCVD should have skipped this one but he didn't and his fans get treated to this mediocre film. Not his fault of course but as a loyal Van Damme fan myself, even I thought this film was bad. Even if you can get passed the minor gripes and try to enjoy the movie, the editing and effects will make you think twice. Everything looks cheap and shoddy.The bad guys are stereotypical in every form and their deaths in some cases are over-exaggerated. Everybody makes bad films from time to time and this is at the bottom of Van Damme's filmography. It would have been a lot better in someone's else hands who understands how to use Van Damme and his talents correctly. Still just off of Van DAmme alone I'm giving this a 4 out of 10. The movie will pass some time if you are looking to kill some but you will be wondering how this movie derailed so bad.
This Re-Animation should have stayed buried
Where to begin? Sluggish pace, weak effects, weaker acting and just plain bad decisions made through out. This is a sequel to 2006's Night of the Living Dead 3D which in turn was a semi remake of the original 1968 classic. We all know the story of how the title of Night of the Living Dead is in public domain and anybody can use it. So it seems every couple of years somebody dusts it off and slaps it on a low grade zombie movie. This is exactly what we have here. Jeffrey Combs and Andrew Divoff (both have very stern roots in horror) play 2 brothers who one inherits the mortuary while the other shows up wanting to use it for a quick cash scheme. Throw in a few employees and about 20 zombies and that is the cast. The pace is very slow and when you combine that with sub par acting then it seems like the movie is longer than it is. You get a zombie here and there (only 1) and most show up in the last 20 min or so when the "outbreak" happens. I was really hoping for something slightly better than this but all I got was another disappointing zombie movie to toss on the pile. Next time use another title or come up with something original. I am giving it a 2/10.
976-Evil II (1992)
Dial it Again....
This sequel has the survivor from the first tracking down a serial killer who is apparently using the 976-evil line to gain demonic powers. The thing is with this story is he isn't really becoming demonic as the character in the first film was. Yeah he shows signs of it but it isn't the same kind of way. More or less he uses astral projection. Almost a different story with the 976-Evil name on it. For straight to video it isn't bad really. Its true claim to fame for horror fans is one scene that steals the movie.That being one of the characters is zapped into the TV and is put into a situation that begins as Its a Wonderful Life and turns into Night of the Living Dead. Such a clever combination and it works so well. Its an idea that's good and executed well but belongs in a better movie. Other than that you have a few car explosions and people being ran over and a few death scenes. Also has a fairly interesting ending which especially at that time you didn't see a lot. Acting wise its your standard low budget actors and nobody is really "phoning " it in. There are also a couple of cameos and a sign to a play that most horror fans will get and understand. So its not great but its not bad either. The wonder life/living dead scene is a show stealer but the movie is average at best.
Ghoulies meets Animal House?
Two fraternities are at war with one another during prank week. What could cause even more chaos? Why add Ghoulies to the mix. No not the same type from the first two movies but ones that talk and crack jokes. Oh yes, this entry decided to blend "horror" and "comedy" together. Instead what you get is both parts falling flat. Its a very silly movie with a very silly premise. Especially when you consider the ghoulies come from an occult looking demonic......toilet. Yeah I know it was sort of a running gag from the first two but this one just makes it even more silly. Then there is the whole fact of the ghoulies talking. What a mistake because as soon as they speak which is in the first act you know what you're in for. Throw in them being controlled by a comic book, cheesy death scenes, unfunny one liners and just a cheap looking movie and you have ghoulies 3. The thing is there are ways of making these types of B movies work. This one just doesn't. Its very silly. Believe it or not it runs a full 90 min before the credits roll. This could have been easily an 80 min movie with credit roll included. It runs out of steam by the end and you began to wonder how much sillier it can get. Maybe that is what they were going for. The subtitle is Ghoulies go to college so you know what you are watching before it even begins. Positives? Has some nice nudity and a joke here and there might crack a smile for the sheer silliness of it. Its a B movie. What would you expect? Even with that fact I can only give it 2 out of 10.
Bloodfist 2050 (2005)
Mindless and mind numbing
Bloodfist 2050 is the ninth in the bloodfist series and it does not star Don Wilson (who was in the previous eight). Here we have Matt Mullins take over as the lead and apply his martial arts to those who need a beat down. In this chapter he is looking for his brother's killer who fights in a no holds barred competition. Sound familiar? For the most part this one is basically rehashing the first Bloodfist's plot even down to the killer's identity. This one takes place in the future (post apocalyptic kind) and the usual anarchy reigns supreme. For the most part Matt Mullins is OK in this. His fighting skill seems to belong in a better movie though as he easily disposes of any foe with ease and a couple of flashy moves. The budget is quite low as there only seems to be about three sets and the extended strip scenes at the strip club seem to be more at home on cinema's late night. All in all this chapter is a let down for anybody who are fans of the first eight. Except for the potential of Mullins the rest of the movie is a bomb and a disappointment.