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alistairc_2000

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71 reviews in total 
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Lucy (2014/I)
2 out of 9 people found the following review useful:
Sexist BS fromTransporter producer, 20 September 2014
1/10

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

Lucy The new movie by Luc Besson. Luc is both good and bad as a writer/director. He has made many fine movies in the form of Leon, the fifth element and Nikita. In his career he has made well over 10 movies but has wrote and produced far more. Taken was great but Taken 2 was just a watered down version of the first movie. Lucy is the same Nikita plot item reworked yet again but as this is now an SF movie can he do it justice?

No. It certainly looks the part and it has Scarlett Johansson. Scarlett gets to wear an adorable black dress and that for me was the highlight of the movie. The problem is the plot and the way it needs certain characters to drive the plot. Scarlett is a dizzy blonde who gets sucker punched into delivering some drugs to cartel. She later wakes to find them sown into her. After she is brutalised further by her captors the drugs leak out and she becomes a super woman. So what does Scarlett do? She goes back and bumps off the underlings of the cartel but leaves the really evil ring leader alive. Is this an intelligent move? No but it is needed to give this creaky plot a driver. Scarlett knows she is going to become the star child (out of 2001), the zenith of the human race. She will be at once the most intelligent woman on the planet and perhaps the stupidest. Well this bosh was written by a man. What do you expect?

So she is going to have a brain the size of a planet (and in Marvin the paranoid android territory) what does she do with it? Very little really. She is going to evolve in 24 hours and she needs all the drugs sent from cartel to evolve to the 100 percent mark. She devises a cunning plan and gets every guy she speaks to to do her bidding no questions asked. Though they are French so this might explain it. She arranges for the drugs to get sent to Paris but they are taken to the most unsecured hospital known to man. So when a load of Chinese rejects from Reservoir dogs turn up no one bats an eyelid. Lucy gets to the airport and then has to drive quickly to hospital. Cue the total unnecessary car chase through Paris. We have seen the Bourne Identity so we know how to get it right. Also Luc has tried the endless car chases with his turgid Taxi and Transporter series. Now there could be some sly digs at women being useless drivers in this part. She drives down all the one way streets. Causes loads of crashes.

Then we get to the part of the movie she is going to ascend but wait what is this the ring leader of the bad guys has got to Paris first? Wow. He is going to get Scarlett one way or another. Blah blah evil terrorist blah blah. This bit of the plot is telegraphs right from the start of the movie. Scarlett aka Lucy turns into various things but ultimately wants to help the human race. If it was my last 24 hours on the planet and I was going to ascend I would get Christopher Lee to get all the great heavy metal bands on the planet to play for me whilst he narrated over it. It is a better ending than this tosh.

In conclusion this is a Luc Besson movie in the vein of his opus Transporter. Trashy, cheap and ultimately very UN fulfilling.

2 out of 5 people found the following review useful:
Dougay Scott Duffer, 20 September 2014
1/10

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

Scott is no stranger to absolutely atrocious acting performances and here shows why is he is getting close to Danny Dire's crown as the worst actor of his generation. Okay I have a confession to make I have disliked him ever since he did the day of the triffids rehash some years back. Also I watched a bit of Aeon Flux last night.

So what of this movie. I was hoping for an unofficial update of Dr Terror's House of Horrors. Freddie Francis's masterpiece from the sixties. No such luck I got to see some turgid nonsense about six passengers on a train but wait, some train driver has decided to go on the rampage.. with six passengers. Another reviewer poured scorn over the train details (agut-65-912139) and I pouring scorn over the plot and the acting performances.

This movie is supposed to be a thriller the first half an hour is trying and failing to show that the characters are human. This section is boring. Then after which a person with a motor cyclist helmet obviously the evil one. Then they are preparing to got to Tunbridge and the train goes through. After which sheer boredom reigns. I have seen speed.

Really I could not work out why what should have been such a taught thriller was so boring, then I remembered that I do not like Scott. Well this movie has not convinced that he can act after he hammed it up so much.

Blackwood (2014)
16 out of 16 people found the following review useful:
British ghost story., 6 August 2014
7/10

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

This is the type of movie that feels like it was written by James Herbert in his Ash the ghost investigator series. If you think of Haunted or Ghosts of Sleath you will get the right idea.

This movie starts so slowly you just keep thinking I wish it would hurry up. A guy is haunted by ghostly goings on in the middle of the night. He is convinced the previous owners of and that they did some nasty things. Basically it turns into a sort of who done it. Then in the last 20 minutes the movie comes alive and explains itself.

Is it worth the wait? This reminded me a lot of Brian Clements 70s series Thriller. 50 minutes of build up then the explanation.

This movie was good but could have been better.

Scintilla (2014)
3 out of 4 people found the following review useful:
Superb British SF/Horror Hybrid, 6 August 2014
10/10

I love these bunker corridor shooter type movies where you are searching for the enigmatic truth that turns out to be far more problematic and puzzling that you originally hoped for.

Billy O'Brien shows that he was not just a flash in the pan with his superbly creepy Isolation being an amazing starting point. Hybrid/Scintilla is the type of movie that should be showing at your local multiplex, reaping the rewards for the British film industry. Of course rather than seeing it on the big screen it is getting a DVD release and a Digital down load release. That is a real shame as this is a movie that deserves to be seen by a wider audience.

Also worth noting that the sound track contains a hybrid of Saxon (Biff Byford) and Balance of power. It is a great song (s) and this shows how forward thinking the film company were in trans-media. It is just such a shame that there is no game as well.

Overall a superb movie that deserves to be watched by all. Looked down my review list and see I like the good stuff.

Total rubbish, 19 July 2014
1/10

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

Well I caught this drivel on Netflix. What was good about it had a good idea. Though it was done in slow motion mode. The plot is ludicrous. Eco terrorist do not want big business to succeed with their aim of giving the world free power without the use of fossil fuels. This is eco terrorists we are talking about. You would think they would be queueing up to help them get the project off the ground.

So these naughty do something at a pivotal moment and mayhem erupts. A lot of the ideas behind this come from the reboot of the British TV series Doomwatch.

If they had made it an hour and a half dropped some of the clichéd dialogue this might have been quite good fun. In the end it was a case of I have seen this done before better.

1 out of 3 people found the following review useful:
Slow Mo FDTD, 1 July 2014
4/10

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

It is like a version of the movie in done in slow motion. The true blood school of horror film making. Yeah I am saying they have made it into a soap opera. Sure there is a bit of violence but all the nudity has gone.

This is just okay for anyone who has never seen the infinitely superior from Dusk to Dawn. Though thankfully it is better than the sequels. I am just glad they did not try to make it like Twilight.

A boring companion to the original movie but not a replacement. Last in line. Last in line. Last in line. Last in line. Just put the rest of the lines to get it to the right length.... really why do I bother?

2 out of 9 people found the following review useful:
The best isolation movie since the thing., 21 January 2014
10/10

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

I watched this with subtitles but that did not diminish the joy I felt at having watched such a great movie.

In one way this movie is about a ecological disaster that mutates into horrible things.

In another it is an isolation drama. What would you do if you were cut off and you needed help? At the start you might not know how bad the situation was but it would creep up on you. Then it would be like a tidal wave of danger but would the characters get swept away? Watch the movie and find out. It was simply a joy to be so scared of such an empty and barren place.

Vendetta (2013)
12 out of 26 people found the following review useful:
A very BIG disappointment, 28 December 2013
4/10

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

Comparing this movie to Death Wish is like comparing the Walking Dead to Dawn of the dead. One is a camp zombie soap opera and the other is a timeless Classic.

In the blurb it is compared to Death Wish. Death Wish is a revenge thriller. Brian Garfield's story is sharp and believable. It has a brutal beginning, a time for self reflection in the middle and a very brutal ending. This is a movie about revenge where the good guy wins. Stephen Reynolds should take note. I also suggest he watches the movie to understand that nearly forty years ago Michael Winner could make a much better movie. Remember the good guy gets to win. He grabs the girl and rides off into the sunset.

In Vendetta Dyer is a hard bitten action hero who is virtually invisible. He appears when he needs to does the deed then disappears like the morning mist. Well that is what the Colonel tells a Police detective half way through the movie. It is of course rubbish. He leaves a trail that anyone can follow.

Spoiler Alert.

So his family is murdered and he is out for revenge. It is a brutal beginning and we get to see the nasty gang bangers having quite a lot of nasty fun. They are bad people. We already knew this but Reynolds has to reinforce it with two hateful events. Then in the middle He takes his time to find the bad people. Like death wish. Then we get to the not particularly brutal ending. Now this is where the movie could have shined after all the bad guys done in his parents. He kills all the people and all of the deaths are off camera. The effects are extremely weak. No gore. I have seen more brutality in The Bill.

It was an okay movie then it has the twist in the tail that changed this from being a Dyer comeback movie to a cheat. In the end the character walks away with nothing a bit like the viewer. It was predictable. All the characters give it large but there is no pay off.

I just paid £10 for Blu Ray now I just need to find someone I do not like to give it to.

1 out of 3 people found the following review useful:
Surprisingly good., 14 December 2013
8/10

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

I had read the reviews absolutely trashing this movie on IMDb. Though I like low budget British horror films. So I thought I would watch this.

Basically an estranged couple go for a weekend break. They decide to get away from it all.

This movie is edgily shot. With bleak shots through out. The music is great. The characters are good. The lead male Brunt is a likable guy who is out of sorts with life. His estranged wife is this socially aloof woman who is more concerned with her position that being kind to her partner.

As the movie develops the zombies attack. This is not World War Z so do not expect a 200 million dollar budget. There is plenty of gore. The movie is not without its problems but it rises above them. This makes it an original take on a crowded scene and for that it is recommended.

Crawl (2011)
1 out of 3 people found the following review useful:
Boring, 11 December 2013
1/10

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

This was a Glasgow Fright Fest selection according to some of the other reviewers. I did not go to that one but have to say what do the organisers have against Scots. This is not a horror movie. It is slow and ponderous. They way they keep panning back from every shot and I keep thinking. Yeah I know get a move on. This movie should have lasted for forty minutes but again and we get the same shot take over and over again.

The plot is some twaddle about a Croatian dude trying to kidnap some woman.

Spoiler alert.

The only funny bit in the whole movie regards a chocolate cake left outside a door.

Spoiler over.

Other than that this is ponderous, slow and predictable. Yeah it does have some fake blood. Also it has a good sound track but in the end the movie just leaves you with the thought why did I bother. Do yourself a favour and do the washing up instead.


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