Reviews

4 ReviewsOrdered By: Date
10/10
It's a Wonderful Life as reimagined by Charles Manson
30 April 2009
Wow, I certainly wasn't expecting it to be this overwhelming. It's the emotional equivalent of having your head kicked in against the curb.

I thought I knew where the story was going but I couldn't shake the sense of sinister dread. I didn't think the story could get any bleaker but then... Maybe I'm doing it a disservice but I would strongly recommend this film to anyone who isn't in an already too fragile state. Because once you invest your own emotions in the story, you are screwed - within minutes I went from sad to angry to shocked and depressed and back and forth etc.

That's quite an achievement. Yes, the film is flawed but you know what? I don't mind that films are flawed, it's the emotional punch that I'm going for. The film is made by someone on a mission (albeit a confused one at times) but the end result is a film that is raw and intimate.

Oh, there is a special place reserved in heaven for all the Bagbys. And a special place in hell for the murderer and the judge who set the murderer loose.
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Donkey Punch (2008)
1/10
The worst of British cinema
30 July 2008
"Donkey Punch" must have started out as a joke, just like "Jaws the Revenge". But somewhere along the line some idiot thought it wasn't such a bad idea after all and miraculously managed to get funding. Shame as "Donkey Punch" is devoid of ALL artistic merit (to paraphrase Bill Hicks) - it's simply someone trying to be Guy Ritchie at his worst. The story is simple - a group of chavs do chavvy things - like the title suggests it involves attempted sodomy and punching women (ha ha ha misogyny is so much fun)- but like Peter Bergs film "Very Bad Things", things go very wrong. What I cannot fathom is why the director Oliver No-Talent has been all over the UK media and is being held up like the next big promising director when it is clear that the guy couldn't even direct traffic. What happened to intelligent British cinema - Powell and Pressburger? Hitchcock? Nic Roeg? If the director has some taste he will just give it all up and start working for M & S. It will do society a lot of good.
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1/10
Awful
31 May 2006
I thought I'd give this film a chance after having seen all the positive reviews on this site. But goddamn this has gotta be one of the worst films I've ever seen! If you wanna witness Mark Ruffalo flush away his career then this is it. Ruffalo who was so charming in "You Can Count on Me" is incredibly lackluster and he completely lacks comedic timing. And folks, let's get this straight - there is NO chemistry between the leads. Bogart-Bacall, now that's chemistry. More examples? Day-Hudson. Hepburn (either one)-Grant. Even Clarkson-Guarini had more chemistry! I normally like Reese Witherspoon, she can like Ruffalo be a very charming presence but in this film she is at her most annoying. You can only do that ditsy cutesy persona for so long... And what the hell's up with the soundtrack? Cover bands galore!
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1/10
Biggest piece of s##t since Passion of the Christ
1 March 2005
Lord, here we go again. Another nasty little revenge tale that uses the "Christian Excuse" - because it's got "values" it can be as awful as it wants. The writing is diabolic. This was based on a play? No wonder people avoid the theater. The actors? Condescending as ever, cast black actors and build the stereotypes. Gospel? Yeah, if you ain't got soul. Please avoid this s##t film and please someone get rid of its director (go back to frying those burgers). I know what some of you are thinking, I am taking this film too seriously. But hold on, take a deep breath, take three steps back and look at the film again. You see? It's a piece of s##t! It's like Bill Hicks said, America is full of morons who watch American Gladiators. The same morons saw this film and made it number one at the Box Office!
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