Reviews written by registered user
toyman1967

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18 reviews in total 
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0 out of 1 people found the following review useful:
Pan's Labyrinth................eh., 12 October 2017
5/10

I was FINALLY able to watch this after YEARS of putting it off and I have to say, with all the positive reviews from just about EVERYBODY, I was a bit disappointed. Sure, it was a beautiful looking and VERY well acted movie but for me, that was it. It wasn't boring in the least as it did hold my attention but I just don't get what everybody sees in it. I just didn't like it. I know that I'm am REALLY in the minority here and I guess that's OK with me. A beautiful film with no substance. Sorry.

Encounter (2016/V)
1 out of 1 people found the following review useful:
Do NOT Encounter this movie!!!!, 22 February 2017
1/10

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

What a HUGE waste of time this was!!! First off, I HATE found footage movies and when I found out that this was one, I should have NOT watched it. It is slow, boring and NOTHING happens!!! Then just when I thought it was about supernatural happenings, it turns into an alien flick. This is by far the WORST movie I have EVER watched and I have watched A lot of BAD movies. I kept falling asleep and having to rewind to see if I missed anything...............I didn't and you wont either if you skip this ROTTEN movie!!!

Split (2016/IX)
47 out of 99 people found the following review useful:
We should have listened to the title of this movie and SPLIT!!!!, 25 January 2017
3/10

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

HOW can a movie with such a HIGH rating be SO bad??!!?? First off I have to say it WAS well acted but you have to have a decent plot to go with it. It was BORING and YES there WAS a twist ending but it was from a movie, that I WONT reveal, that I predicted the ending to within the first half hour and if you HAVEN'T seen THAT movie you will have NO idea what I'm, or everyone else, is talking about. The last time I went to a movie based on a high rating was to see "It Follows". It should have been called "Sh&t Follows". THIS one should have just been called "SH&T". Save your money!!!! M. Night Shamalamadingdong's movies are going downhill with every new one. Can you say "The Crappening"? By the way, my wife fell asleep during most of the movie and SEVERAL moviegoers shouted "this sucks" when the movie was over so I don't know what movie OTHERS reviewers saw but it wasn't THIS one.

Tenebre (1982)
2 out of 6 people found the following review useful:
Argento's BEST?? I'd hate to see his WORST!, 16 February 2015
3/10

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

I just got done watching this mess of a film and felt that I just HAD to write a review on it. Why does this film have such a high rating? The acting is horrible, the editing is rotten and the "twist" I figured out within the first fifteen minutes. Other users talk about how bloody this movie is and the amount of nudity is in it. I must have been watching a whole different version because the one I was watching had very little nudity and hardly any blood, except at the end, and a victim has her hand or arm cut off, not in the version I saw. I watched a version called Tenebre, not Unsane, on Amazon Prime and it said it was unrated but I think it was HORRIBLY cut. I have watched only one other Argento movie and that being Cat O'Nine Tails and that one was bad as well. I saw that this movie had such a high rating from viewers that I should give it a try. WRONG!!! I've seen better acted movies from Troma films. If this is what Italian Gallo is, I'll just stick to my American films.

32 out of 44 people found the following review useful:
THIS is why people are afraid of clowns!!!!, 1 November 2013
6/10

I just got done watching All Hallows' Eve and I have to say that even though it's not a great movie, I did enjoy it. The movie is a series of three short stories with a wrap-around story as its' tie-in. It's a low budget movie with mediocre acting and some decent gore effects but when it is over you'll be glad you watched it. I wont tell you what the stories are about. I'll let you find out as you watch it but what I WILL tell you is that you'll NEVER look at a clown the same way again!!! The first story is just okay, the second story is just plain awful but you'll LOVE the third story and the wrap-around story starts off slow but you'll LOVE it by its' end. Again, it's a low budget movie and most of the time they are painful to watch but there ARE exceptions and All Hallows' Eve is one of the exceptions...........and NO, I'm NOT associated in ANY way with this film. I am just a horror fan who enjoyed this movie.

1 out of 3 people found the following review useful:
A Smokey and The Bandit movie WITHOUT Bo, The Snowman or Sheriff Buford!!!!, 17 July 2013
4/10

This is one of 4 television adaptations of Smokey and The Bandit that featured Brian Bloom and a whole host of other 90's TV stars. I never knew they existed until I saw the Smokey and The Bandit 7-pack on DVD in stores. They were made by Universal TV Studios and directed by Hal Needham in the early 90's. I don't know whose idea it was to make these movies, as the interest in Smokey and The Bandit had died out years before, but it wasn't a good idea. I caught THIS one on the Encore Family movie channel yesterday and I KNEW that it wouldn't be that good but I am a HUGE fan so I just HAD to watch it for the first time as ANY of these television movies are RARE to see on TV. I haven't seen the other ones in this series but if they are anything like THIS one they will probably be just as bad...........but I'd still watch them once to say that I've seen them. I'd recommend these to the DIE HARD fans of Smokey and The Bandit ONLY!!!!

4 out of 8 people found the following review useful:
Dr. Strangelove.......strange covers it!!!, 8 November 2012
3/10

I don't get it!!!!! I haven't written many reviews but after watching this, I feel compelled to do so. I have heard this movies' reputation for YEARS about how GREAT it is so I got the opportunity to watch it and I did and I will say it again......I don't get it!!!! I found it neither funny OR good. How can a movie about the end of the world be funny??? The war room scenes are long, drawn-out and tedious and the scenes in the airplane are repetitive(sorry about the spelling) and BORING!!! What is SO good about this movie??? Someone please tell me!!! I invite fellow IMDb users to tell me or am I just missing the whole point to the movie???

6 out of 10 people found the following review useful:
Machete Joe may be scarred but NOW I'M scarred for life!!!!, 6 March 2012
1/10

I haven't written a review for a film in quite a while but after watching this movie I feel compelled to do so!! I have NOTHING good to say about this movie at all!! The big stars of this film are Art Evans and Ernie Hudson but they only appear in this film a TOTAL of about 5 minutes COMBINED. The acting is horrendous, some of the worst I've EVER seen and I've seen MANY bad-acted movies. I would even put the movie "The Room" above this one in terms of better acted bad movies. There are NO redeeming qualities about this movie so I'm going to stop now because I just realized that I'm wasting my time reviewing a film that ALREADY wasted my time!!! Just stay away from Machete Joe!!!!

The Trip (1967/II)
1 out of 4 people found the following review useful:
Wow, man. Look at all the pretty colors!!!!!, 20 May 2010
3/10

Dude, all I have to say about this movie is..........WOW!!!! I don't usually go for this type of movie but I saw that it was on Retroplex and I have heard of it for years but have never seen it. The (plot?) is about this soon-to-be-divorced TV commercial director and his LSD trip and the effects it has on him..............that's it. I seen that it was written by Jack Nicholson. What did he have to write???? All there is is a bunch of psychedelic colors, some very loud late 60's music and Peter Fonda running around. Dennis Hopper plays a flipped out drug dealer and Bruce Dern plays Fonda's friend who introduces him to LSD. You won't need any luggage to go on this trip. All you will need is some weed and some LSD and you are on your way.

A Side to Robert Culp I Wish I Had Never Seen!!!!, 12 May 2010
1/10

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

Sometime last year I bought A compilation of 20 horror movies called HORROR DO NOT WATCH ALONE for $5 at Wal-Mart. It contained mostly z-grade movies from the 60's to the early 80's such as Dementia 13, The Night Evelyn Came Out of the Grave, House by the Cemetery and this one that I am reviewing, among others. I thought it was a great deal. Boy, was I wrong!!! The compilation SHOULD have been called DO NOT WATCH AT ALL!!! These movies SUCK!!!! I will stick to reviewing THIS movie right now. I should have known I was in for trouble when I was watching the opening credits and seen that it was put out by Penthouse. Yes, the magazine. So I kept watching it thinking how bad can it be. There were some ghostly voices, a haunted house and some pretty freaky music and that's about it. AND THEN........Robert Culp hops on a horse and all hell breaks loose for no apparent reason what-so-ever!!!!! Sex galore and naked people everywhere..........INCLUDING ROBERT CULP!!!! I SPY Robert Culp's thingamajig!!! Then somebody dies and it's over. This movie defines the era in which it was made. Billy Joe Royal who sang the 60's song "Cherry Hill Park" sings a song and appears briefly in this piece of crap. The ONLY reason ANYONE needs to see this is if you want to see Robert Culp naked. Others, keep adoring him as Debra's father on Everyone Loves Raymond. I'm sure this was a poop stain on his resume.


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