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17 reviews in total 
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The Jar (1984)
7 out of 8 people found the following review useful:
Below the bottom of the Barrel, 19 March 2002

I rented this back in the 1980's, and the bad taste still lingers. Not one redeeming quality. Not worth watching, even for the thrill of a "fun" bad movie.

Let's drop the subject right here...

"Blakes 7" (1978)
0 out of 2 people found the following review useful:
Bad Effects, Great Series, 19 March 2002

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

Sci Fi shows today are chuck full of special effects, and short on script. This show was just the opposite.

Blake, a political prisoner in a future ruled by an evil Federation, is being transfered to a prison world with a shipload of other criminals. The shuttle find a derelict space ship en route, and stops to investigate. The guards who go on board, are killed.

The remaining guards send a few "expendable" prisoners into the ship. But they figure out the way to disarm the security system, and take over the ship.

So now Blake and a half dozen petty crooks are in charge of an alien vessel that is the most powerful ship the Federation has ever seen. The Federation wants the ship, and the crew doesn't trust one another.

The amazing thing about this show was it's revolving cast of semi - regulars. Characters you came to love would die, or disappear . Sometime heroicly, sometime tragically, and usually unexpectedly. I was constantly wondering who would survive. You never knew.

The bottom line is that the characters and stories were compelling and complex. Sure the effects were bargain basement, (a notch below Dr. Who), but the stories, for the most part, were first rate.

I won't spoil the ending, but suffice it to say that it was something I've never seen before of since. I wish someone would remake it using todays special effects, and most of yesterdays scripts.

If you love Science Fiction, rent the series. Give it a few episodes to grow on you.

1 out of 2 people found the following review useful:
Santa says "Mindless fun", 19 March 2002

I'm a professional Santa Clause, so i guess I found a perverse pleasure in this flick.

A boy, whose witnesses his parent's murder by a guy in a Santa suit, grows up to be a worker in a department store. When the store's Santa gets drunk on the job, the boy is drafted against his wishes into playing Santa. Let the mayhem begin!

The set up is so transparent, you're just waiting to see the guy blow a gasket. The cheesy FX add to the general goofiness.

Sit back, have a few beers, put your brain on hold, and enjoy!

2 out of 5 people found the following review useful:
A sorry excuse for a series, 16 March 2002

If Gene Roddenberry wasn't already dead, it would kill him to see his name on this series. Everyone agrees the first season was good, and showed a lot of promise. But the death of the main character, Boone, was the end of the series as far as creativity is concerned.

I seriously doubt anyone still connected with the writing of the show have a clue what they're doing, or what science fiction is. The entire premise of the show has been ripped out, and replaced with new evil aliens that are so laughable you can't suspend your disbelief for even a second.

This series should have died about 3 seasons back. Hopefully this will be it's last. (March / 2002)

3 out of 4 people found the following review useful:
Suddenly I'm 9 years old again!, 15 March 2002

Just hearing the title sends me tumbling back in time to age 9, sitting in front of my old black and white TV watching "Creature Features" on channel 5 in New York City.

In retrospect, it may have had poor special effects, but who cares? This was the type of sci-fi kids my age lived for. It can't compare to modern monsters, but creeping around in the ships air vents, this monster did just find. As a child, it scared me to death, exposed zipper and all.

Yes, "Alien" is based on this film, and also an Italian Sci Fi flick called "Planet of Vampires" or "Vampire Planet". (In that flick, a ship answers a distress call from a derelict ship, and finds an oversized alien skeleton slumped over the controls).

Get a copy, turn out the lights, and remember what it was like to be a little kid scared of cardboard sets and rubber monsters!

5 out of 5 people found the following review useful:
Are my comments needed?, 15 March 2002

We all agree this was probably the best crime series ever made, despite NBC's reluctance to support and promote it. This was TV acting, scripting, and directing at it's best.

What the public could not accept, was that the stories did not have neat endings. Life, and crime stories are messy. The show reflected that. And I'm grateful for it's honesty.

On the other hand, I'm grateful they allowed the show to have a movie that ended several major story lines. At the end of it all, we needed closure, even it some of the endings weren't "happy endings". That in itself showed the quality - the truth of this show.

Fiction can be truthful, and "real". This was the best example . And NBC should hang it's head in shame for the way it treated it. I'm glad that "Munch" still lives on Law & Order SVU, but it's a shadow of a great character in a great show.

On TV you take what you get.

2 out of 5 people found the following review useful:
A Real waste of Time, 4 March 2002

This is obviously a vanity project by some people who thought they were rock stars, movie stars, and film makers all in one.

They are not.

This is what I call a "Fast Forward Film". To pad out the time, the "actors" take long walks where nothing happens. Or there are long establishing shots where nothing happens. So if you put your VCR on fast forward, you can watch most of it without missing the story.

The highlight was the "hero" being attached by demons. One was a starfish with an eyeball in the center. I think it was made of play dough.

You may still find this on the bottom rack of some second rate video store. Do yourself a favor and leave it there.

0 out of 2 people found the following review useful:
Stupid is as stupid does., 17 February 2002

I saw this on TV, premiering at 2:00 AM. So The local TV station was using it as filler cause they couldn't sell enough infomercials. That sums it up.

I have to have at least four lines for the IMDB to process this review. But I can't think of anything else to say about this film.

Oh yes - don't waste your time.

Dead Alive (1992)
Another point., 17 February 2002

The first review pretty much sums it up, except to point out it's a horror film done in a cartoon type of style. Lots of comedy.

By the time you get to the lawn mover scene, your jaw kinda drops open and you say to yourself "He's not going to do that..."

And of course, he does.

Don't let your mom see this, especially if you live at home. I highly recommend this film too.

6 out of 9 people found the following review useful:
The problem is..., 17 February 2002

Here's the set up. Earth is going to be half fried by a giant flare the sun is getting ready to shoot off. A ship is sent to drop a bomb on the sun to make the flare go off away from Earth.

Not a bad premise, and the film has a lot going for it. But...

The problem is with a subplot. Half the population is in danger of being fried to death, and someone on Earth wants the mission to fail.


Otherwise there are great special effects, a few tense scenes with real conflict. If they had edited out that sub plot, it would be a much better film.

Still recommended for science fiction / space buffs. Worth a look.

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