Change Your Image
Upload An Image
Crop And Save
Hard Luck (2006)
If you know or care what is going on by the end...good on you.
Slow moving, a little incoherent and with next to know pay off.
You must have been sniffing paraffin if you think this is good a GCSE student scripted this after an all night Tarantino movie watching session Incoherent, badly scripted, hammy dialogued, in places poorly acted. See Wesley Snipes amble from one flung together scene to another (with little or no continuity) as he inexplicably meets a lot of deranged, unbelievable, two dimensional characters.
The only value this movie has is that it features Snipes, who manages to put in an OK performance (unbelievably under the circumstances).
Its tried, its old, its clichéd, it's a waste of your money and/or time and finally it features Mario-Van conducting one scene wheeling about imparting dialogue on a push-bike why? Who the hell knows.
At the end if you know or care what is going on then you must be on some higher level of consciousness is all I am saying! Avoid, unless you want to laugh at a bad movie done badly.
Rubbish I will say that again
The Animal (2001)
The best feature length, live action, slapstick, animal based comedy of the year
I think you have missed the point of 'The Animal' completely. It is truly brilliant.
First off there is Schneider himself, with the acrobatic dexterous slapstick genius that is only equalled by Keaton and Chaplin while his characterisation of a failing, loser, police office evidence clerk is the equal to any performance put in by Brando, Olivia, Hopkins or Curry.
The production values, while not overly high, portray an attention to detail unrivalled by any feature length, live action, slapstick, animal based comedy that came out that year. Whilst the script is as cutting and contemporary as anything produced by a Hollywood studio, the directing demonstrates a brilliance that a comedy (even of this calibre) rarely get the luxury of having.
The over loud animal noises, the nob gags, the bum gags, the brilliant juxtaposing of 'funny' animal related physical jokes and human social events that on the face of it a 7 year old could have wrote but in reality could only have been penned by a genius.
The plot is brilliant, inspired and in places truly emotional. (I don't want to spoil this truly great movie so don't read on if you haven't seen it).
Mourning the loss of his father, Marvin has to come to terms with his inability to find a companion and his spiralling out of control lack of self confidence. Ostracised by his work colleagues, ritually abused by his neighbour (and her viscous dog) and devoid of any and all satisfaction personally and professionally. Its to this backdrop that Marvin suffers a hideous debilitating car accident but is miraculously saved by having his DNA spliced with an unknown amount of domesticated animal DNA and having some body part replacement.
The movie covers politically hot topics such as whether using animal DNA in humans is acceptable, the ethics of breeding animals for body parts, the threat of hunting on animal populations and the cost of animal conservation, that cannibalism is acceptable and that bestiality is OK. This is not to mention the exploration between god, man and animal and the questions regarding animal consciousness.
This is apart form the everyday elements of work place rivalry, racism, fat-ism, sexism, gun control, murder, meat eating and monkey jokes.
On a personal level, I have watched this movie 1000 times and have yet to not find it funny, I literally end up doubled up in pain, crying.....with laughter its just that good. I challenge anyone to get through this movie and not laugh at one joke, its not possible. Brilliant brilliant brilliant.
The bit where the scientist suggest Marvin get rid of his latent aggression fuelled by his sexual urge by sleeping with a chimpanzee in a pink tutu is possibly the funniest thing I have ever seen in my life...my life!! If you don't laugh at this movie your just dead inside.
Mr Schneider we salute you another fantastic movie, lets hope he ignores the billions of ignorant critics, the unjust reviews and the failing box office returns and goes on to make the animal 2 and 3. Brilliant!
Screaming Ninja (1987)
For hardcore fans of the genre only
Screaming Ninja is about a Chinese boxer who goes on a journey to avenge the massacre of his village by an invading Japanese army.
The production quality on this is so bad that it makes the already flimsy and hard to follow plot even harder to follow. So instead you end up waiting for the few and far between action scenes to kick in.
Although this is usually the status quo for the genre and something fans may be willing to put up with it still proves hard going, some fight sequences are entertaining but nothing you wouldn't have seen done better before.
Watching on fast forward until the fights might be your best option as trying to get into the plot and characters will take some doing.
Unless you love this stuff....just avoid it.