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44 reviews in total 
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The Ward (2010)
6 out of 13 people found the following review useful:
Carpenter is not back!, 4 June 2011

I can't believe that this is being billing as John Carpenter's comeback.

It's just another routine 'ghost in the asylum' film that's been done so many times recently, nothing original here at all.

There's so little going on. It's boring, dull and unimaginative, it could easily have been a Masters Of Horror episode!

How can the guy who made Halloween and The Thing go on to make stuff like this (not to mention other turds like Escape From L.A and Ghosts Of Mars!).....No more chances from me Carpenter...stick to the Coup de Villes!

300 out of 415 people found the following review useful:
Nastiest Film Ever...Most Probably!!!, 26 July 2010

OK, I finally got round to watching A Serbian FILM.

I consider myself to be in the heavyweight division when it comes to having seen the most hardcore of horror/shock films, i.e, Slaughtered Vomit Dolls, The Gateway Meat, Murder-Set-Pieces, Irreversible, Men Behind The Sun, All the Cannibal films, name it, I've probably seen it. Now, I have to say, NONE are as nasty as this beast!

Im not going to say what happens in the film, but even for me, some was hard to watch. BUT the actual film is GOOD!...If you can get through it.

The basic story is about a guy called Milos, who is a retired porn star, who in his day was the best actor in the business. Now he is a bit skint, so when he gets offered one last job, offering him enough money to set him and his family up for life, he just can't turn it down. He asks what the film is about, but the employer is reluctant to tell.....what happens is indescribable!!! Like I said it is very hard to watch in some scenes, but the film is actually really good, and the acting is solid throughout.

You got to think, the poorer European countries, are rife with crime, and money goes a long way. So if you are having hard times and a massive money offer comes your way...How far would you go!

For me 8/10, but I can't recommend it, simply for the content in the film. But if you think you can take it, and can appreciate it for the film it is, go for it!

15 out of 21 people found the following review useful:
So Bad...It's embarrassing!, 24 July 2010

After watching the original 2001 Maniacs, with Robert Englund, and really enjoying it, I was quite excited about the sequel when I heard about it.

Lots of positive reviews, saying it was better than the first, and more hopes were quite high.

...Now I have seen the sequel, and I'm not kidding's one of the worst films I have seen in years, honestly, the acting is soooo bad it's as if they are just people who were randomly picked up off the street! I know you don't watch a film like this for the acting, but when it's this bad, there really is no excuse!

As for the gore, well frankly it does'nt come close to the first one. after 45 minutes only 2 folks have bitten the bullet, and neither one was gory at all!...Then you wait for it to kick off (that's if you haven't press eject on your DVD player by now), it just don't happen. The couple of so-so gory effects towards the end are so badly done, obviously dummy's, you could'nt care less.

Anyway, I don't want to waste any more time on this pile of dog turd. I must just say, all the 10/10 reviews MUST be people involved with this film, they have to be!


Stolen (2009)
7 out of 14 people found the following review useful:
Good mystery movie..., 9 July 2010

Stolen is a good mystery movie.

If you are looking for something to pass 90 minutes, you could do a lot worse.

The story basically is a cop, Tom Adkins, is haunted by the disappearance of his son 8 years ago. Then he discovers the remains of another boy about the same age as his own son, who was murdered 50 years previously. He becomes obsessed with the case, which has been long-forgotten. Is the 1958 case, involving down-on-his-luck dad of three family man, Matthew Wakefield and his own sons disappearance linked in any way to that of Tom Adkins?

Acting is fine by all.

Personally I thought the film started really well, and I thought the 1958 story was more interesting than the present story. But the ending seemed a tad rushed.

But, not a bad film at all.

My advice...well worth renting....but don not buy! (It's a watch once film)

Fantacide (2007) (V)
1 out of 3 people found the following review useful:
"Give him the Treatment!", 5 April 2010

If you are a fan of hard-gore films and are not easily offended...this is the film for you!

It's certainly not for everyone thats for sure (my wife lasted about 10 minutes max!)

I managed to pick the Special Edition DVD up a few years ago, and I have seen it 4 times...I loved it!

A big shout has to go out to Peter Rands (Oppenheimer), this guy must be in his 80's, and Im not sure he knew what he was doing half the time, but he had me and my mates in stitches!

The film offends just about EVERYONE, seriously no one escapes here! It contains rape, animal cruelty, violence to gay people, Jewish people, torture...basically everything in the book.

The gore effects, which there are plenty of, are very good on the whole. The acting, well it's not the best, but that's what makes it so much fun...think Peter Jackson's Bad Tast, just a Director and a bunch of mates making a film, I think Shane Mather has a lot going for him, I been keeping an eye out for more stuff, but as yet there has'nt been anything.

If this is anything to go by...I can't wait! So basically if you like extreme violence, loads of gore, and don't get offended, you got to try and seek this's well worth it!

By the way, forget looking for it in the UK, the BBFC would throw it out in the first 5 minutes...and never welcome it back!

6 out of 10 people found the following review useful:
Decent enough remake..., 22 January 2010

I loved the original Long Weekend....Very underrated movie.

This remake was literally a scene for scene remake, no new ideas, so I suppose if you have seen the original and remember it fairly well, you are going to no what happens next! But I remember the original fairly well (I have the SYNAPSE DVD) but I still enjoyed Natures Grave. Jim Caviezel and Claudia Cavan play the unhappy couple well.

The film basically is a married couple who are having a rough time go away for a long weekend, and find themselves on an isolated beach. They treat the place with total disrespect (chucking away cigarette butts, litter, shooting bottles)) and shooting the animals...then nature turns on them! Pretty slow but always interesting. Solid acting. Little gore, so not much to offend here.

Tidy little movie. Surprised about the negative reviews really.


Hanger (2009) (V)
2 out of 7 people found the following review useful:
Certainly Not For Everybody!!!, 9 January 2010

First of all I loved Ryan Nicholsons earlier film GUTTERBALLS, so I was eagerly anticipating HANGER.

Now I have seen it, I did,nt rate it as much as GUTTERBALLS, but I still enjoyed HANGER, but it definitely is'nt for everybody.

There is some pretty nasty stuff going on in this film, a coat hanger getting shoved up a vagina to remove an unborn baby!...Tampon tea!!! to name but a few nasty treats.

But seriously, it is'nt pleasant viewing but if you enjoyed GUTTERBALLS, I would say give it a try...I can't recommend it really, but I did like it myself - There are some funny moments in it as well, some quite good lines and the Chinese kid made me laugh too.

My advice is rent it if you can, my wife bought my one for Xmas pressie and Im pleased with it, but as I already said it is difficult to recommend.

7 Out Of 10 for me.

5 out of 10 people found the following review useful:
Average Horror...Awful Comedy, 23 September 2009

I just sat through Audie & The Wolf, I don't want to be to harsh on it, but it was,nt very good.

It,s about a guy who has his spirit put into a wolf by ancient Indians form the Battle Of Custer. It is now present day and he is in Suburban America, where he breaks into a house and kills the young girl who lives there. He needs fresh meat and kills anybody who turns up. Then all his victims turn up to exact revenge - American WEREWOLF style! It ain't a bad story, but they have added this comedy side to the film which really does not work at all! Not one joke works, if you think the wolf (when hes in man form) running round with furry monster slippers on is funny, you may enjoy the comedy factor in it.

The film is quite gory, which is a plus point because the effects are quite good, and frequent throughout the film.

It is a mere 76 minutes running time, which is plenty for this film, uneven, disjointed and does,nt work unfortunately.

Grotesque (2009)
8 out of 13 people found the following review useful:
They Would Have Been Slaughtered..., 19 September 2009

I know this was withdrawn by the BBFC, but I can't believe this was even considered for a release. I just finished watching it and it is basically just 2 people (a guy and a gal) getting tortured, raped and abused by a sick deviate! What you see on screen is VERY hard to watch at times (Nipples getting cut off with a pair of scissors, and a rape scene involving both the MALE and FEMALE!)), and the camera never shies away. I must say the gore effects are very well done. I picked my copy up off ebay for 4 pounds, I Wasn't disappointed, I knew what I was letting myself in for, but it is very sick, and most people will absolutely hate there is ablsolutley no plot whatsoever, why he tortures these two nobody really knows!

How on earth this nearly saw the light of day in the UK, the BBFC would have been slaughtered for letting it through!

97 out of 156 people found the following review useful:
It;s Going To Be A Halloween Tradition, 30 August 2009

I saw Trick 'r Treat last night as part of FRIGHTEST in Leicester Square, all I need to say is it had a round of applause at the end (which does'nt usually happen in the UK), and it wasn't down to the fact that Michael Dougherty was there!

I have seen thousands of horror films and T'r T is undoubtedly one of the best films I have ever seen.

From the moment it started I got the feeling I was going to like it, you can tell it had a fair amount of money chucked it's way, the set looks fantastic. This is going straight to DVD in October, with no theatrical run (it was made in 2007)...Unbelievable! From the acting to the effects to the direction - the whole thing is just masterful.

The film itself basically is set on Halloween, and a bunch of stories interweave into one in a very clever way, it is sort of like the CREEPSHOW films but each story is'nt standalone, they are all going on at the same time and come together at the end. I did'nt know to much when I went into it, and I think it's the best way because there are a bundle of great surprises littered throughout! It makes me wonder how a movie like Prom Night remake and the coulntless SAW films get a Theatrical Run and a film as awesome as this just gets shelved and disregarded.

A true masterpiece by any admission, and sure to be INSTANT CLASSIC!

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