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Real Gangsters (2013)
Really, Really Bad
I cannot understand how a film this bad could have possibly been funded. Oh wait I think I can. A friend of mine forced me to watch this drivel over the weekend. We basically had to fast forward through parts of it because it is absolutely unwatchable. There is basically no plot, the acting is horrendous. D'Angelo is just not believable as the Gangster. Anyone that annoying and obnoxious would have been whacked within seconds by the mob. I guess Frank also thought it would be a great idea to replace dialog with incessant swearing. The F'bombs are off the scale!! The rest of the acting? what can I say. Sad would be it. Seeing Margot Kidder and Tony Rosato (fine actors in their day) reduced to working in this kind of joke is really pathetic. In addition to the acting, the filming of this movie looks like low budget porno. The filming angles of some of the scenes just don't work. Many times you can clearly see the bewildered looks on some of the actors who don't seem to realize they are in the shot or just cannot stay in character as they wait for the inane dialog to unfold. Its not even funny bad, its just bad!!
Che: Part Two (2008)
Soderburgh gets it right
A lot of the problem many people have with this movie is that they seem to think that the story should have been more entertaining (ignoring it is based on a true story) or ranting against a film that glorifies Che (which it really doesn't). This film is very close to Jon Anderson's definitive bio on Che and gets the story right. Soderburgh does an excellent job of setting the mood for the unraveling debacle that was Che's Bolivian adventure. You really get the impression of the total timidity and bewilderment of the Bolvian peasant to Che's revolutionary ideas or of the difficulties that his men faced with hunger and the terrain. Sorry to bore the attention challenged movie fan out there but that was how it happened. So don't go into this movie expecting a Rambo shoot em up, its a true story!
South Park (1997)
Super.. thanks for asking!
Most of the people who criticize this show, do so because they are either prudes or dont get it. As for the animation being bad, isnt that kind of the joke as well?? Some of these episodes are comic masterpieces not just for their gross out qualities but also for their social satire. "Death camp of tolerance", "Fat Camp" and "Timmy 2000" are absolutely biting in their lampooning of Americana. The writers on this show are dead on in their ridiculing of many aspects of American culture and the tons of obscure references to movies or Tv shows (Star Trek) are well done. Easily one of the best shows on TV.
American Wedding (2003)
It is exactly what you expect from the previous 2 films, however the writing and most of the characters arent really there. The strangest part for me was seeing a boom mike in full view above the heads of Stiffler and Cadence (in the scene where they first meet). This is a big budget film, surely they must have noticed that amateurish error?
A non sensical diversion
Go to this movie only if you are ready to suspend your disbelief. It is truly mindless entertainment. Not really that bad but not that great as well. Depp is good, the plot is interesting but the unfolding of the tale is full of flaws. The end is excruciatingly cheezy and absurd. You think they could have written a better one than that thinking off the tops of their heads! 6/10
The Ben Stiller Show (1992)
Too smart for the average plebian
This show was excellent. Great actors, funny skits, good writing. The problem?? Most of the humour required a brain and some inteligence. Combine that with the 7pm time slot on Sunday night that it was originally on and the fact that Fox totally gave up on it and you have a total cancellation misjustice. The skits were hilarious, The U2 parody, the video diary ("I ate today"), Legends of Springsteen and the Tonight show tryouts were all phenomenally funny. It was an absolute embarassment that the show was not continued even though its contemporary SNL at the time (and since) was horrible! If you can catch this in reruns do so!!
Hong fen bing tuan (1982)
The dubbing of this film deserves an honarary Oscar. From the terrible choices of English words to the insults and even the odd accents, this film has it all. The kommandant of the prison steals the show with his fearsome speeches including berating the prisoners ferociously as "all-time losers!". Add to this 7 hot Asian babes all with their own special skill and a requisite Fat guy and... voila a cinematic tour de force. Lately this movie has been packaged as a Jackie Chan movie. This is a shameless sales pitch as Chan only has a small part in it. Nevertheless a true work of genius to be savoured.
The Four Feathers (2002)
A truly horrible film
The Acting and the plot of this film are flat out horrendous.I dont know how anyone can watch this movie and not start to question it immediately. The story isnt properly explained throughout the film. Over and over you are wondering, "how did that happen??". How does Heath Ledger manage to get himself on his soldier salary to Sudan to follow the troops? How do the locals not notice a guy among them that has European features?, How does Heath's best buddy, blinded and bleeding, make it back to England when he surrounded by the enemy in the desert?How does Heath even manage to keep the feathers on him after he is put into the prison? How does Abou get shot in the one scene (carrying Heath's buddy( and then emerge without a scratch. Dont directors think of these things before they release a film? The acting is embarassing as well. Kate Hudson is awful as the love interest here and Heath is pretty average. All in all a giant waste of time!!
Black Samson (1974)
Who's the man??? Black Samson!!!
If you are into unintentional comedy, classic one liners or a ridiculous plot then this movie is for you. This along with Dolomite should be in the Blackploitation hall of fame!! Rockne Tarkington's performance is electric as the staff wielding, lion owning barowner Samson. He truly is the man. Add to to this William Smith's over the top Johnny Napa, Samson's hysterical hoochie mama and one badass mortician and you have the makings of an epic battle. The stakes?? Control of the ghetto!!. The tension builds until a final conflict replete with matresses being thrown off a roof, ultimately settles the score! A true period piece if there ever was one. Thumbs up! Way up!!
If if's and but's were...
First off this film was called "twice upon a yesterday" in the theatre and on video when I saw it, so this other title may confuse you. **spoilers follow**. This is a solid film. An interesting story, well directed and well acted. The reason I like this film so much is that it examines all those twists of fate that govern one's life. How many times has one wondered what might have been had one not met a person at a certain place at a certain time? Or also wondered if only I could undo what has happened! Victor's character gets a chance at redemption and he is able to try and mend his ways. However his life seems destined to go a certain way. I liked how this film explored that whole idea of karma and destiny and how maybe life would have gone exactly the same way no matter what we envisioned. As a guy one can only laugh as well as empathize with Victor's paranoia over his girlfriend's impending infidelity. There is nothing he can do to stop it, because it is fate. All in all, a well crafted little fairy tale.