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The Order is only relative, not absolute.
The Pillars of the Earth (2010)
Unbelievable bad and dumb
Can live with bad effects, the setting is OK. But historically so unbelievable bad. And the historical errors mostly not from the book. This isn't a movie in a medieval setting. This is a bad dream of the middle ages. The importance of Follet's first Pillars-Book to bring light in the "dark ages". They weren't dark. But the series brings all to dark black night. A monk who should been hanged? In the middle ages? Prior Philipp really ask Jack if he would be praying! Never a people in the European middle ages would ask such a question. Never somebody would think, you would not pray! Thiefes who get burned? Nonsense, they were hanged. In the middle ages "witches" were not often burned. This happened mostly in the later times until the french revolution. But yeah! A bit incest, so we have something to look at! Please - don't bring the really bad second book to "life". The imagination is horror.
Caterina di Russia (1963)
Technically well made - historically a catastrophe
Yes - it's Fun to SEE this movie. Costumes, Art Direction, Cinematography are really wonderful.
But historically it's a disaster. The Bad German Czar and his sad wife (the author seems to forgotten, she was a German too). The bad Czar was in real life an reformer. Intrigous were Catharine and Orloff - here they are shown as victims. But it's nothing new. Often in history the Kingslayer at the end shown as the heroes. But it makes nothing better.
The acting is all in all good, only the leading actress (she really looks bad here) is only cold and colorless. Mostly Raul Grassilli as Peter III. is really good.
This movie is only an anti-German history-fake. Sad, but true.
Der Heiland auf dem Eiland (2004)
This a German version of Don Camillo and Peppone. The Priest Pfarrer Erdmann (von der Lippe) comes to a small island (Soonderney) in the north-sea. There he meets its future opponent: Mayor Fredericksen. A hate love begins.
So long - so good. But now the problems starting. It's not funny! It's a very simple, very crude kind of Comedy. The normally funny man Jürgen von der Lippe can't save anything. Sometimes it's so bad, it nearly hurts.
All here is only poor - Acting, writing, directing, art direction and so on. And the worst thing is - the second season is coming now! Heaven help us!
Antonio e Cleopatra (1996)
Oh my Good...
Give them some Costumes and say they are Antony and Cleopatra - more is not possible if D'Amato makes a movie of this Kind. Plot - for what a plot? If we let Fu*k some ugly men with some much more uglier woman. But for this we don't need a "Big Budget" Porn-Movie. And then there is the Question - for what a Big Budget here? There's nothing more than some Costumes and papier-maché-Culisses. No other Action then fu*king and so on. Historically a Disaster - but I've not expected more than this.
Absolutely not worth to be watched.
2/10 - because they do something. This not good - but it's more than only standing around.
Yes. Legends live forever
This movie is the first real movie with the characters of the only real comicbook of former East-Germany. The heroes, the Abrafaxe - Abrax, Brabax & Califax (the heirs of the in East-Germany absolutely famous Digedags) for the first time appearing in the Mosaik-Comic-Book #1/1976. Since then more than 300 issues (every month one) are published. The Abrafaxe are one of less good Things who survived East-Germany while the German reunification. And now they're going to the Big Screen.
First is to say - the Abrafaxe are NOT children. They are a kind of Elfes, Goblins (in a positive way) or what ever, nobody knows. They are on her big voyage through time and space. They've participated on much historical events in world's history. And ever there are new secrets to discover.
Here they are now in the 17th century in the Caribbean Sea. The high time of the pirates. And of course they are involved in a very special adventure. And this adventure is a good movie, specially for the kids. But for the fan it's not so pleasant. And for an adult who never heard about the Mosaik, the Abrafaxe and their origin - it's unsatisfactory. In the best moments it's good as a Disney-movie. But today in times of Pixar an Anime should be more than this. And by the way - the story is not more than OK. Maybe it would have been better to start with an older story out of the Comics.
As moviefan 6 out of 10. As fanboy 8 out of 10. It was good to see the heroes of my youth on the big screen.
Imperium: Augustus (2003)
Believe nothing here!
What can I say about this? Such a big Prestige-Production - but in the End? Wasted Time, wasted Money.
This work a disaster is historically seen. Only some examples:
* Augustus often is named 'Gaius' - his First name (Pronomen). But the old Romans don't used this Name. Correct would be the Surname (Nomen Gentile and Cognomen) or the 'Octavian', 'Caesar', 'Augustus'.
* Livia was shown as tyrannic Wife. But this historically wrong.
* Iulia was shown as nice young woman - but she wasn't one. Adultery and (maybe?) Prostitution and arrogant behavior was the cause of her banishing.
* She wasn't at the dying bed of her Father. She never was allowed to leave her banishing. And she was at this time around 50 years old! Not as young as she was shown. In the same Year Augustus died she committed suicide, because Tiberius stopped giving her a Pension.
* Augustus was much more scruplesless then in this Movie shown. But Author and Director seems to believe Augustus' own 'Res Gestae'.
What remains? Historically extremely doubtful, bad acting, bad built and equipment - 2 Points out of 10 - one for Peter O'Toole.
...altrimenti ci arrabbiamo! (1974)
The Worst Spencer Hill!
What's to say about this Rubbish? Not Much. It's definitely the worst of all Spencer/Hill-Movies. Not a bit funny. It seems, Donald Pleasence needed Money this Time and came do make a uninspired Appearance in an non-English European Low-Budget-Pulp (like for Example Edward G. Robinson in Die Abenteuer des Kardinal Brown or Yul Brynner in a lot of Movies). You don't need a Brain to look at this 'Movie'. It's definitely not like an other Critic here means a 'GREAT COMEDY ONLY FOR THE INTELLIGENT!'. Oh no.
4 of 10 Points for this Pulp. And I give two more than I should. 2 as Present. One for Mr. Hill, one for Mr. Spencer.
I hope, sometime I can forget this Rubbish.
Good Bye Lenin! (2003)
It is strange. Germany is again divided. Does one ask Germans according to its opinion to this movie, he usually get negative criticisms of West German ones however positive criticisms of the Germans from the former GDR. Why is it like that? Many of the West Germans are going into the movie, without having any conception of the life in the GDR. It's is not clear to them that one could live also in the east of Germany without continuous fear. That one could love. Could have fun. They do not understand the fact that also the East German had fun alive and not they are not only sitting and crying in their chambers.
The film is ingenious! It creates the balance between the good memories and the negative sides. Also the mix from Drama and Comedy, that often one criticizes stands for the film very well to face. How can one criticize such a combination? Most of the best comedies have also tragic sides.
Clearly 10 points.
Hot & Saucy Pizza Girls (1978)
Funny, funny, funny
I never thought, an adult movie could be so good - but this movie is so good! A funny sample for the pornographic cinema of the 70's, a sample for that, what's later in the 90's is shown in movies like _Boogie Nights (1997)_ (qv) . And it's a sample for the easy Life without AIDS! I never had so much fun with a porn! 10 Points!
Die Feuerzangenbowle (1944)
Best German Movie ever
"Die Feuerzangenbowle" is absolutly one of the Best Movies ever and the Best German Movie at all. In my personal Ranking the "Feuerzangenbowle" is under my TOP 8 Movies. Between "The Life of Brian" it's the funniest Movie. It's made during the II. World War near Berlin. At one Time the British and US-Bomber came and at the other Time this Movie was made. Such a funny Movie in such a Dark Time. In the Beginning the Movie was forbidden by the Nazis but the they need every Laugh for the poor German Humans.
The Cast of this Movie it outstanding in the German History. There are not only Stars, no - but every Character is perfect casted. The leading Man Heinz Rühmann is the Best Actor in the History of German Movies. And here he has his Best Part before his Character-Time from the End of the 50s to the End of the 60s. He played the leading Role in the Oscar nominated Movie "The Captain of Koepenick" and a supporting Role - his only Hollywood Movie (he was too old this Time and don't wanted to leave Germany for longer Time) - Stanley Kramer's "The Ship of Fools". The "Halliwell's" means, he is Great in this Movie. It's truly sad for non-German speaking Persons that they can't see his Movies (you can but at the most important Countries like USA, UK, Canada, France, Japan and Australia are non-English or non-Motherlanguage not often shown and seen)
sorry for my bad English (I learn and try - learning by doing)