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cafesmitty

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66 reviews in total 
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Mr. Brooks (2007)
Good Movie, But way too busy, 24 June 2014
6/10

I like the movie, didn't love it and it is a rental at best. Costner plays a "serial" killer name Mr. Brooks. The movie opens up with him accepting an award for Business Man of the Year and he has his "urges" and he must take care of it. Someone witness his latest killing and now that person wants something. Meanwhile Demi Moore plays a local detective going through a hard divorce. She is brilliant at her job, but her divorce got her distracted a bit. She is "assigned" to the Mr. Brooks case.

This movie could have been and should have been better.. especially the end.. they had the perfect ending and they they went an additional 5 minutes too far. Because what happened before was brilliant. But the biggest problem with the movie is that they had about 4 different stories going on. The movie lacked serious focus. And pretty much 2-3 of the stories didn't really enhance the movie... Therer was Mr. Brooks; Demi's Divorce; Demi's other case; and Mr. Brooks daughter. Because of the lack of focus, I give this film 6 out of 10.

Godzilla (2014)
1 out of 3 people found the following review useful:
Godzilla. Good enough, 18 May 2014
7/10

I'm a fan of Gozilla movies. And this was way better than the Matthew Broderick one. But being a fan this is a straight forward Godzilla movie with better CGI. It wasn't mind blowing so it's no as 10, but it was satisfying. And I'm not going to include any spoilers but seriously it's impossible to spoil a Godziila movie. Giant lizard + mankind. Shake and watch stuff get destroyed. Some issues: I thought they took to long setting up the movie. And a slight issue with the creature design. And as I said the story was straight forward. And we didn't get enough of Godzilla's fire breathe because when they did show it, it was great. The movie feature some talented actors and actresses but this movie really didn't need THAT much acting. Fun to see the dude from Kick A in another movie. But regardless of who is in it, it is entertaining and that's all that counts with this type of movie. I say a must see on the big screen.

73 out of 123 people found the following review useful:
Love the first one, I wanted to like this, but...., 12 October 2013
4/10

Let me start off by saying love love love the first Machete. I can watch it anytime... This one, not so much. Robert Rodriquez swung for the fences with this one and it missed. Some people will never ever say anything bad about the guy and some will genuinely like it, but to be honest.. it just didn't have that X factor the first Machete did. This time around Machete is more like a super hero. He is sent on a mission to Mexico by the President (excellent choice of casting Charlie Sheen, using his birth name of Carlos Esteves). But other than that, (and of course Danny Trejo and Michelle Rodriquez), the rest of the cast just didn't fit. The schizo Mexican revolutionary didn't fit, Cuba was completely out of place, wasn't really feeling Lady Gaga or Amber Heard (even though she is gorgeous) and the gorgeous Sophia Vegara was just a little too manic. But it really wasn't that.. the film just was kind of flat, even the action scenes weren't clicking. Maybe because they gave away too much in the previews. Maybe its because they made Machete inhuman.. All I know is that when I was in the theater, 3 people around me fell asleep and 4 people walked out a hour after the film started... AND it wasn't that many people in the theater. Gosh I wanted it to be so much better.. This is a rental, at best

"Face Off" (2011)
4 out of 4 people found the following review useful:
Best Competition Show, 29 May 2013
10/10

You know what is truly great about this competition show? People either win or lose not base on personality and the rest of the country calling, but by the experts. The judges are in the business and it is only appropriate that they along decide the fate of who goes on and who don't. I've seen some remarkable creations by some extremely talented and dedicate makeup professionals. You get to see a lot of the behind the scenes stuff and techniques in creature/character creations and how to make quality stuff on a budget. The contestants are always working with a time constraint and the stuff that comes out of their heads from just a suggestion is amazing. None of it comes off fake... none of that fake personality clash drama and a lot of the contestants tend to help out their fellow competitors, whether it is releasing a mode or coming up with a concept. I think that if this is your passion, to get into the movie business and be a creature/makeup professional this is a MUST show for you to watch. But even for a layman like me, I find it fascinating. And I generally like all the contestants on the show (except Frank from the first season). But I would love to just have a room full of paints and stuff and just told to create something. Even if I was to fail, it still would be so amazingly cool. And when people "don't" get along, they do tolerate, but it isn't fake. There is no yelling at each other or over the top acting out. It's just about people who are passionate about makeup. I give it a 10 as in not comparison to scripted show, but only comparison to other unscripted show and for me, its the best.

27 out of 52 people found the following review useful:
Worse Acting, Writing, Directing for a debut in recent memory, 28 May 2013
1/10

So I watch another program on VH1 and I saw the adverts for this show. Being a straight guy, I figure the show would be tailored made for me, hot chicks wearing skimpy outfits dancing to a good grove. I couldn't be more wrong. The chicks are hot, but the writing, acting. music and directing is so atrocious that it inspired me to read, go hiking, count the imperfections in my ceiling.. anything but watch this show. The characters are cookie cutter characters... the new and kind girl who wants to be friends with everyone. The head evil cheerleader who is extremely mean spirited. Throw in the love interest, the basketball player who LITERALLY gets run into by accident by the new girl. And throw in the most unlikely person to play a coach of a head basketball team, Dean Cain (Lois & Clark). How this show ever get green-lit it is beyond me but it is a complete garbage of a show. The tryouts, the dancing tryouts? Uninspiring. Completely horrible. It as if this show has no one coordinating as they "actresses" (use very loosely) basically spin and hop like a chicken with it's head cut off that ran into an electrified fence! Then the worse of worse... line delivery... I am not even remotely an expert but I know bad when i hear it and it doesn't even measure up as "good" as bad. In the end, here is a show about cheer leading tryouts in the NBA, and a cheer squad, in a sunny location, with hot women in revealing outfits, throw in a relative hip hop beat, and it is the most boring thing on TV. Enough to stop me watching the moment that the cheerleader ran into the NBA player... (and the NBA player.. just some random black guy they probably grab from a local Olive Garden or Applebee's). And by the Power of my remote control, I have vanquished thee from my television.

Oblivion (2013/I)
1 out of 2 people found the following review useful:
A really good Sci-Fi flick, beautiful imagery, 21 April 2013
7/10

First, I recommend going to the theater to see this movie because it was made to be shown on a massive screen. I thought it was a really good Sci-Fi flick, good story line, good pacing. My friend and I never once found ourselves board. They did a good job of telling the story. It starts off with the future and throughout the movie you find exactly what happened. Tom Cruise is kind of like a more "action" oriented Wall-E. As he and his manager are left to fix the drones that roam the earth. And you know, with any destitute place you always will have a monkey wrench thrown into the mix, but its a really good monkey wrench. Its a gorgeously looking picture and the thing about Sci-Fi vs action for me is that is about, could it be believable.. and I say yes. It has good action scenes in it as well. I compare it to Prometheus and it has better pacing and more action than that movie, although they have about the same scale. I recommend seeing it on a large screen because the scale of the imagery and the job at hand is really beautiful. I saw it on an IMAX screen.

Branded (2012)
0 out of 2 people found the following review useful:
Not a Sci-Fi or Fantasy movie, it's a statement film, 27 January 2013
4/10

Overall, I have no problems with statement films, but if you going to make a movie like that, then ADVERTISE it that way. I know the previews were misleading on purpose so you can have an epiphany and say "Oh, they were making a statement with the preview", but I think that is complete bull. If you advertise a Sci-Fi movie and you deliver something else, all you are doing is tee-ing off your audience. As you all can probably tell from the preview, the movie is about advertisement and our association with it. Unfortunately, even as a statement film, the movie lost focus. The creatures you see in the preview practically means nothing and for a time, they are just annoying because they are just uninteresting blobs. LeeLee really doesn't do anything more than to be a focal point for the main actor from time to time. Max Von Sydow is completely wasted in this film. They had a chance to do something really special here in turns of statement film and they completely missed. I would only rent this from the dollar rental from Redbox or wait for cable. And if you want to stop watching halfway through, go ahead because trust me, you aren't missing anything eye opening. Filmed entirely in Moscow (I think maybe one other location in Russia) and it felt like a bad foreign production.

2 out of 11 people found the following review useful:
Exasperating Slow start, 18 December 2012
7/10

First, I think people who are "true" fans, the D&D, Gamers are going to love this film no matter what. I love the other three, but to give you my honest opinion, this film is so slow of a start that I wanted to give up on it. I like the film, but didn't love it and I tell you why. The Dwarfs makeup were so fake looking that it played more like a Saturday Morning Puppet show than a adventure movie. And of course they come in all shape and sizes and for a minute there I thought they were rejects from a Snow White film. They sure acted like it. But the movie just trudges along at a slow pace and it's not revealing any true relevant information. Unlike the other three, when this one was over, I wasn't thinking "wow". I was thinking, thank god. It fees a heck of a lot longer than 3 hours, I can tell you that and a good movie should never make it seems you are spending more time in the theater than you actually have. I think true fans will love it, but I think most people will like it. Once the movie got going and the pace picked up, I thought it gotten better. But o me, it is Peter Jackson version of the Phantom Menace. Beautiful to look at, but missing that "X" factor. It isn't magical. It is just another movie, not an adventure. It's a bit too kiddie. I can't see myself sitting in the theater and watching it again. I couldn't get past the slowness and the fake-looking characters. One last thing... beautiful set and I welcome all the familiar faces.

In Time (2011)
0 out of 1 people found the following review useful:
Eh, worth the rental, 1 March 2012
5/10

Cool concept of a movie and Timberlake is pretty good in it, but the dialog is clunky at best and there isn't any chemistry between the co- star. Justin lives in the ghetto, Amanda lives in upper society. The only currency is time itself. Having time, keeps you alive. They never explain how people are engineer that their lives are measure by a timer, it just is. With everything you do, you have to pay for it in giving up time on your life. You can get time back by borrowing it, stealing it, or being super rich. Rich guys comes into the ghetto, tired of living, he gives all his time (a century) to Timberlake. Justin, having all the time in the world, goes to see where the rich lives. He meets Amanda and bada bing, they are being chase. The whole premise of the movie is based on people running out of time and controlling time Like I said, good concept, but not so good execution. It just flat in a lot of places, A LOT. Amanda isn't ask to do a whole lot and she doesn't to include deliver her lines with any convictions. The movie should be called "Justin Timberlake gets chased" Because is on him 90% of the time. Everyone else is just cardboard background people, to include the guy playing Amanda's dad and the cop that chases Justin. And the end of the movie is so anti-climatic and boring and it makes no real sense. Still, if you must see it, Rent it from Redbox for a dollar or wait for it on Netflix or HBO.

22 out of 44 people found the following review useful:
one star and I am being generous!, 22 April 2011
1/10

This was a must see, because after all, it is called Hobo With A Shotgun, HOWEVER, it is not a well done movie at all. Here is the premise of the movie, what if someone made a Quentin Tarantino or Robert Rodriquez film without their talent. This is what you get with this film. The people who rate this film high have lost their minds. The problem is the actors don't seem to believe it. Their characters act cartoony and thats the difference between something like Planet Terror. So now I know to watch out for cool sounding titles, because it is not the title or the subject matter, it is who directs it. But if you must see if, please wait for it to come on HBO or Netflix instant streaming, but do not buy, do not rent, just watch when it becomes available. Because trust me, this is no Machete, it is no Death Proof, it is truly a pretender with a director who has no idea on how to direct and with a writer who storyline was pretty garbage for a movie with such a basic concept. How in the world do you screw up a movie called Hobo With A Shotgun? Easily, have this moronic director make it.

One of the other main problem is that it isn't fun, at all. It's violence for the sake of violence with no point. And I have a tolerance for many things, but there are some scene (such as a bus, scene, not giving anything away), that I found reprehensible. No one, not even Rutger Hauer was believable and if this is satire, it didn't come through, it is just exploitive. Guys, do yourself a huge huge favor and DO NOT subject your wives, children, girlfriends, dates or any females you know to this nonsense or you will forever be in the doghouse. They will never forgive you and it will always be brought up throughout the rest of your future history (remember when you insisted on watching that Hobo Shotgun movie). Me and my male friends watched it and we loved Machete but hated, hated this.


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